Only After I Was Reborn Did I Realize That I Had Childhood Sweethearts

(TL: Trust me, I don't know where Part 4 is either..)

What am I doing…

I'm truly despicable.

Really.

Mei Fang, oh Mei Fang, you're such a shameless man.

She invited you to live together because she trusted you as a fellow hometown friend, and here you are getting delusional!

She's a girl who lacks love and companionship. Bipolar disorder might distort her emotional needs, but you shouldn't misinterpret things so easily.

We're just friends.

Yes, just friends…

To an ordinary guy like him, Lin Youxi remained an untouchable goddess—even if she was a fallen one.

I should stop overthinking.

Isn't it enough just to stay by her side like this?

But then again, it's not right for me to keep living here indefinitely…

Once this game is done, I'll move out…

Mei Fang barely slept a wink that night. By morning, he felt the paradoxical vigor of someone on the brink of collapse. Yet he waited until their usual departure time before getting up, only to find Lin Youxi's door still tightly shut.

Not daring to disturb her, he sent a message:

"Take your time resting today. Remember to take your meds."

Then he tiptoed through his morning routine.

After washing up, there was still no movement from Lin Youxi's room. Mei Fang prepared a box of pan-fried dumplings for her brunch, placed her medication beside it with a note, and sent another message—still no reply.

…She must still be asleep.

With that assumption, he left quietly, gently closing the door behind him.

Working on zero sleep wasn't new to Mei Fang, but the bizarre adrenaline rush always made him oddly productive.

"Xiao Cao, that proposal I asked for yesterday—"

"Already done! Sent the doc. Please review."

Xiao Cao hovered eagerly as Mei Fang skimmed the file before nodding.

"These event templates are mostly reskins, but double-check the spreadsheet structure with programming. A table with hundreds of rows for gift packs is begging for errors."

"Got it… By the way, Boss Fang, maybe ease up a bit? Your dark circles are brutal despite fewer late nights lately."

"Just insomnia. What're you implying?"

"Rumor says you're cohabiting with your girlfriend now. True?"

"We're not dating."

"But not denying the cohabitation, huh? So it's imminent?"

"Shut it."

Xiao Cao slunk back to his desk, sighing dramatically.

"Even the eternally single, terminally straight Boss Fang is abandoning the bachelor alliance. What hope do I have?"

"Don't worry, Xiao Cao. You're young—plenty of lonely years ahead!"

"HAHAHA!"

"Seconded!"

"Laugh all you want! When I finally get a girlfriend, we'll see who's—"

"Wait, isn't 520 coming up? Time to scout trash bins for discarded roses again?"

"Oh damn, good reminder. Gotta prep."

"PFFFT—"

Amid the laughter, Mei Fang realized:5/20—yet another manufactured romantic holiday.

…Whatever. Not like it concerns me.

Yet Lin Youxi's face surfaced in his mind.

Ugh, this lovesick brain…

Checking his messages, there was still no reply from her.

…Is she still upset about yesterday?

Can't blame her… She trusted me as a friend, and I hugged her.

But…

It was just a hug! Unless—

Argh!

What is she thinking?

After agonizing, he drafted another message:

[About yesterday—my bad. Let's forget it happened… Or if you can't, that's okay too. If you feel I crossed a line, I'll start apartment hunting this week. But please, considering I cook/clean for you, don't sue me. I couldn't handle that qwq]

He sent the rambling text bracing for her reaction—only to see:

[Message delivered but rejected by recipient.]

Oh no oh no—

Frantically calling her, he got only a busy signal.

[The number you dialed is currently unavailable.]

…An episode? Is this depression hitting after mania?

Armed with mental health knowledge, Mei Fang suspected the crash—likely exacerbated by last night's emotional trigger.

Though crushed by yet another block, he understood her condition. Without hesitation, he requested leave.

"Boss Yu, family emergency. Need to bail early."

His manager nodded sagely. "Roommate trouble?"

"…Yeah."

"Go, go!Roommatematters take priority!"

"Stop looking at me like that…"

After notifying his team—

[@All: Off-site today. Ping me for urgent issues. Otherwise, ask Xiao Cao.]

Employee A: [Can Xiao Cao handle it?]

Xiao Cao: [If Boss Fang can do it, so can I!]

Employee B: [Boss Fang has a gf. Do you?]

Xiao Cao: [Laughing through the pain.jpg]

Mei Fang raced home by taxi.

Depressive episodes brought severe lows and irrational pessimism—and today, he hadn't even ensured Lin Youxi took her meds.

Unlocking the door, he found the apartment silent and empty, Lin Youxi's bedroom door ajar.

"Youxi? Are you home?"

No response. The dumplings and pills sat untouched on the table.

Her shoes…Her shoes—

She hadn't even swapped into outdoor footwear. Her slippers remained indoors.

Did she leave barefoot?

Barefoot, in pajamas…

Panic mounting, Mei Fang searched the building—questioning guards, reviewing CCTV, interrogating elderly mahjong players—but no one recalled seeing a girl matching her description.

Outside the complex lay a riverside walkway. The water was shallow, unbarricaded—

But if someone truly wanted to…

Gritting his teeth, Mei Fang combed the path, his calls growing increasingly desperate.

"Lin Youxi—where are you?"

"LIN YOUXI!"

At 3 PM, the trail was sparsely populated. He lowered his voice when passersby neared, but after fruitless laps, he abandoned decorum entirely.

"LIIIN—YOUU—XII—"

God… I haven't slept all night.

Gasping for air, his heart throbbed with alarming intensity.

If I keep this up, I'll collapse before finding her.

Not here, not home—where else?

How far could bare feet take her?

Why has no one seen her?!

Frantic, Mei Fang trudged home under the setting sun, the glow of household lights and chimney smoke mocking his solitude.

A lump formed in his throat.

If only I hadn't hugged her.

She'd still be okay.

This wouldn't be happening.

With her unstable mood today, I shouldn't have gone to work.

I should've stayed.

If she's really gone… If something happened… How could I face her parents—no, her parents' spirits in the afterlife?

I… I don't know…

Returning to the empty apartment, Mei Fang—still unable to reach Lin Youxi—grabbed a drink from the fridge.

The moment he opened it, his legs buckled. Clutching the door, he crumpled to his knees as overwhelming helplessness wracked his body. Silent sobs shook his frame.

No one witnessed the devastation on his face.

As he wiped his eyes and reached for his phone to call the police, athudcame from Lin Youxi's room.

…?

Alert, Mei Fang rushed in.

The bed was empty.

Her bunny slippers sat neatly by the footboard.

Still no Lin Youxi.

Turning to leave, his gaze snagged on the wardrobe.

…

Gulping, he gripped the handle and slowly pulled—

—as sunset rays spilled through the window, illuminating the figure curled inside.

Clad in rumpled sleepwear, hair disheveled, Lin Youxi hugged her knees, her dazed but clear eyes lifting to meet his.

Mei Fang struggled to swallow, his voice cracking as he forced a smile.

"What… are you doing in there?"

"Playing hide-and-seek…?"

Lin Youxi shook her head listlessly.

"You can hit me or yell at me. No need to pretend."

"I'm a disgusting mess when episodes hit."

"Sometimes… I'm worse than this."

"Everyone's better off if I'm dead."

"A burden either way."

"Don't you think?"

"No! I've never—"

Exhausted, Mei Fang reached into the wardrobe. "Come eat. You've had nothing all day."

"And your meds… Skipping them makes it harder."

"Leave me alone."

"I'm a mentally ill freak. Not worth your effort."

She remained motionless. "Forget finishing the game together. I'll just destroy you first."

"I don't want to see you like this."

"It's fine… I'll take care of you… Really…"

Coaxing her out, Mei Fang's stomach churned violently, but he kept his tone gentle.

"I'm a masochist anyway. Ilikebeing tormented by you… But you can't starve yourself…"

"Please.Just this once… Come out and eat…"

His legs gave way, sending him kneeling—but he collapsed forward into Lin Youxi's arms.

No ulterior motives this time.

Just holding her.

Clutchingher, even as she shoved at him.

"Listen to me… Just eat something, okay?Please."

Every ounce of strength went into that embrace.

"What's so great about me? I've blocked you twice. Why chase me?"

Lin Youxi's voice turned eerily coy.

"Do youwantme that badly?"

"Want tofuckme?"

"Hmm?"

"Go ahead. Do it until you're satisfied—then leave me."

"Well?"

Instead of answering, she felt tremors against her shoulder—and the dampness of tears.

Ah…

After a long silence, Lin Youxi finally relented.

"Mei Fang, you idiot."

"You'll regret falling for someone like me…"

Leaning close, she whispered:

"Ah Fang, I'm hungry."

"Let me out."

Those words unlocked his grip. Wiping his face, he rasped:

"Okay… I'll make food. Or order takeout if you prefer."

"The dumplings from this morning. Those were mine."

"Got it. I'll reheat—"

As he stood, Lin Youxi yanked him back down.

Before he could react, she pressed her lips to his—clumsily but earnestly.

Veryearnestly.

Arms winding around him, pouring gratitude into the kiss.

Or perhaps…

Something more?

Equally inexperienced, Mei Fang let her lead until, breathless, he caught her wandering hands.

Ten minutes later, they finally parted.

Hah…

Cradling his face, Lin Youxi smiled—soft and warm.

"Ah Fang."

"Yeah?"

"You taste the best."

"I want another bite."

"…Spare me."