Of Men and Spiders

Scott didn't know how to feel. His dad was a pirate? His mom was a pirate? At least Alice's dad was still kinda lame, but even he took on a new light given, well, everything. Maybe that wasn't the case. Maybe his mom's brain had just been fried by all the drugs she'd gotten into. Maybe...

But he also remembered things that didn't quite add up. When he'd started training in basic weapons handling as a scout trainee, his mom had all sorts of surprisingly effective tips. The one time she'd taken him to the range, she nailed the bullseyes like it was nothing. At the time, he'd just thought she was a savant with an unexplored talent, but maybe that skill had been born of long practice and life-or-death combat.

But who had that combat been against? Traders and merchants trying to make an honest living shipping goods and services between planets? Innocent civilians, who just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time? Did she usually spare them, or was she a "dead men tell no tales" kind of pirate? And even if she spared them most of the time, surely some fought back, and what then?

Then there was his dad. He'd always had tales about fending off pirates, yet he'd been one. Were these stories entirely made up? Or had they been based on reality but from a different perspective with a different ending? He wasn't the son of a hero and a loving mother. He was the son of two pirates with innocent blood on their hands!

He set down the computer and stared at the cavern ceiling, lost and overwhelmed. His whole life before now had been a lie! What should he do now? What could he do now? What...

His thoughts were interrupted by movement to his right. There was far too much mass and limbs so near at hand, making Scott jump to his feet and shout incoherently before his brain caught up with him and he realized it was just Charlotte's other/main body. He closed his eyes and slowed his breathing momentarily, trying to calm his frayed nerves.

When he opened them again, Charlotte was staring at him in that odd way of hers. Scott smiled sheepishly. "Ah, yeah, sorry about that. I guess I was just a little too caught up in my thoughts and didn't realize how close you'd gotten, so you scared me a bit."

Charlotte leaned back a little. "You were scared of me? Have I done something to make you fear for your safety?"

Scott smiled and shook his head. "No, it's not anything you've done. It's not that simple, or maybe it's more simple than that, depending on how you look at it..."

While Scott couldn't quite read Charlotte's body language as well with this larger version of her, she seemed confused. "I understand the words you said, but not the way you used them."

Scott laughed at himself, and maybe a little of that laughter was directed at the absurdity of everything he'd been faced with at the same time. "That's because I didn't explain it well. Sorry, my thoughts are a bit of a jumble right now. What I was trying to say is it's not your fault that I still find you scary sometimes. It's just instinct."

Charlotte settled in place a little. "Instinct? But I thought humans were self-aware? Why rely on instinct?"

Scott looked at her in confusion. "Well, we use a combination of thought and instinct. Don't you?"

Charlotte shook her head no, which was odd on this more alien-looking body. It involved a bit more motion from her upper torso than usual. "No. Everything I do in each of my bodies is driven by thought and choice. There is no instinct. That was removed from our consciousness generations ago."

Trying to understand, Scott shook his head. "But what about reactions? For example, if I place my hand on something hot, my body will react, pulling it away from the hot surface before I know I've burned myself. Don't you have something like that?"

The large alien spider mantis shook her head no again. "No, I systematically test things for danger using my eyes and hands. If one of my limbs is damaged, I take note of the damage's severity and categorize the risk of future contact. If the limb is severely damaged, I can either dispose of it or reabsorb it to aid in the construction of a new limb."

At first, that surprised Scott, but the more he thought about it, the more it made sense. Evolutionarily speaking, losing a single bee in a hive is hardly a risk, though there was still the question of her main body. "But what about your main body? Surely, you have some means to protect that. What would happen if it were damaged or lost? Woulnd't you die?"

Charlotte seemed more confused. "Main body? There is no main body. The only way for me to die is if all my selves die. This is very rare for a She. Usually, only systematic eradication of all of a She's hives can result in extinction. Such a thing has not happened in many generations. Though recently, I came close to such an event..."

Scott still didn't like the use of the word She as a description of a race, but he's given up on fighting Charlotte on that subject. But still, the implications of what she'd just said... "So wait. What about this body here? If it were to die right now, what would happen to you?"

Charlotte tilted her head again. "I would be temporarily diminished, but one of my backup creation selves would take its place. However, if all creation selves were destroyed, as nearly happened not long ago, each hand has the necessary genetics to become a new crude creation self, which can then create a new full creation self, though much of my knowledge would be lost in the process and I would be very vulnerable for a time. A certain amount of knowledge can be stored genetically to be accessed once I regain enough selves to become fully cognizant again. However, such a thing is a severe setback in the progress of a She."

There was a lot there to unpack but at the core of it... "So wait... No, I mean... What you're saying is... So there's no main you? You're not a queen running a hive but rather the whole hive, is you? Even this guy?" Scott pointed at a passing "hand."

Charlotte nodded. "Yes."

Looking around, Scott pointed at a wall. "What about the tunnels? Those are obviously somewhat biological. Are those you as well?"

This time, Charlotte tilted her head. "Yes and no. You don't have an equivalent I'm aware of, but I suppose it would be somewhat similar to your hair or nails. It's not something I have direct control over, though I can shape it or direct it to grow and behave how I need at any given time."

Trying to process what he'd just heard, Scott sat down again. "So wait, I'm like, inside you right now? You're not going to digest me or anything, right?"

While he couldn't quite make anything out in her tone, Scott got the distinct impression Charlotte was amused as she responded. "If a small animal were to sit in your hair, would it be in danger of being digested by you?"

Scott shook his head. "No, but it might be in danger of being swatted."

When Charlotte answered this time, Scott almost got the impression she was offended, though maybe that was just in his mind. He wasn't even sure if she was capable of being offended! "I will not swat you or your sister."

Feeling stupid, Scott shook his head. "No, I know that... I'm sorry. It's not your fault. It all just goes back to that instinct thing again. Since, apparently, unlike you, we only have one self, we're programmed to protect that self at nearly all costs. It's so ingrained in us that when anything similar to a potential danger from our ancestor's past appears, our mind is instinctively wary of it. And you trigger a LOT of potential danger signs."

Charlotte leaned forward, and Scott got the impression of curiosity. "There are things in your people's past similar to a She?"

Scott kind of wavered. "Well, yes, and no. There are things that look very similar to your hands. We call them spiders. They're usually pretty small, even the biggest ones aren't much bigger than my actual hand, but they're all venomous. Most of the time, their venoms are only mild irritants to us, maybe painful, but not really dangerous, but some species of spiders are quite deadly. Given that they're so small and easily overlooked, our brains have been hardwired to notice the kind of movement they make and avoid it at all costs."

So far, Charlotte seemed to be following, so Scott continued. "We also have hive animals, like bees or ants. Any individual bee or ant is of no real danger to most people, but an entire hive can kill us, so again, when we see creatures swarming in large quantities, we've been programmed to avoid that. Then, of course, there are large predators on earth, maybe not quite as big as yourself, but still bigger than a human. Despite their size, they've learned many tricks to blend in with their surroundings and move subtly, so when we notice a large creature moving close to us, we've been programmed to treat it as a threat. You combine all three of those into one, and it's a large part of why you still occasionally trigger a bit of a fight or flight response in me."

After a moment, Charlotte tilted her head again. "So then, what you're saying is all this time, you've been scared of me?"

Scott laughed at the naivety of the question. "Well, again, yes and no, and as time goes on, the answer is more and more frequently no. You still trigger some instinctual reactions in me, but I've come to trust you pretty implicitly. Honestly, right now, I think I might trust you more than our parents..."

-

This was a lot of information for Charlotte to process. Apparently, her physical attributes caused humans to distrust her on a level that even logic and reason couldn't override. Though trust could be gained over time, there was still a core part of themselves that remained wary. It was also evident that Scott reacted more strongly to this form than her other. That did make sense since the other form was designed to emulate human behaviors to an extent. Perhaps further refinement for an appendage designed for human interactions would be advantageous. Especially if this experiment with Scott and Alice proves successful and other interactions become possible.

This complication was brought on because humans retained their instinctive selves along with their sapient selves. It had long been speculated among the She that the two mindsets were mutually exclusive, and perhaps for them, it was. After all, having instincts would often mean individual appendages would act to preserve themselves, possibly to the detriment of the She in her entirety. But with humans, it was not quite the same. Since every body has their own unique intelligence, being able to act in self-preservation before thinking could mean the difference between life and death for the individual. Though this was not without flaws, as Scott's reactions to Charlotte had proven, it did seem like it might be more beneficial than not to the survival of humans.

Then, there was the last bit of information. The fact that Scott claimed to trust her more than his own parents. From what Charlotte knew, the bond between humans and their parents was typically quite firm, and until now, it had also seemed that way for Scott. Perhaps something had changed? It might have to do with the condensed information he'd gained from his mother's tool.

Rather than speculate, it would probably be best to address the question directly. "What has happened to cause distrust between you and your parents?"

-

The question hit Scott surprisingly hard, considering he'd just expressed a similar thought. The wound was fresh, and even a little prodding hurt. However, a part of him wanted to talk about it, or perhaps more accurately, to vent about it. Besides, some of the information may even be relevant to Chalrotte's own well-being. "Well, for one thing, I just found out my entire life has been a lie."

After a moment of consideration, Charlotte had a question for Scott. "What is a lie?"

Scott sighed, hoping his choice of words wouldn't cause too much trouble in the near future. "A lie is when someone knowingly tells a falsehood. For example, if I told you the sky outside was red, knowing it's actually blue, that would be a lie."

Charlotte tilted her head. "But sometimes the sky is red."

Scott shook his head. "Right, but that's not... okay, bad example. Let's say I told you Alice isn't my sister. That would be a lie."

Charlotte tilted her head in a different direction. "Well, you two have a different father. Alice informed me that makes you 'half-brother and sister.'"

Why was it so hard to explain a simple concept like lying? Scott decided to make it more obvious. "Okay, let's give this one more try. If I were to tell you that humans stood ten feet tall, breathed fire, and had wings, that would be a lie."

That only seemed to confuse Charlotte more. "But why would you tell me such a thing? I can obviously see that's not the case."

Scott nodded half-heartedly. "Well, it's not always so obvious, especially when you trust the person telling you a lie."

There was a stillness to Charlotte as she asked. "What is the purpose of lying?"

This was a delicate subject, but Scott supposed it would have come up eventually. "Well, there's lots of reasons someone might lie. Sometimes, it's done with good intentions. A person might lie to make someone feel better or protect them from harm. But more often, a lie is told for selfish reasons, often to gain something from someone else through deceit."

Charlotte tilted her head again. "And humans lie often?"

Scott shook his head. "Well, most of the time, no, it's actually considered a bad thing to do, and if people get caught lying, there's usually a punishment depending on the severity of the lie. But still, some people lie often. Pirates, for example."

Scott had been expecting Charlotte to ask more about the meaning and purpose of lying, but instead, she switched back to the original subject. "And your parents lied to you?"

Scott nodded angrily. "Yes. They've lied to me my whole life about being pirates."

Of course, that led to the next logical question Charlotte would ask. "What is a pirate?"

Closing his eyes, Scott took a moment to think of how to explain the idea of pirates. "Pirates are people who live by taking from others, frequently hurting them in one way or another or even killing them. They are some of the worst criminals in human society and are usually hunted down and exterminated. They are scum."

Charlotte was quiet for several moments before speaking again. "How would you have been treated if you were raised as the son of a pirate?"

Scott stopped and thought a moment. How would his life have been different? "Well, for one thing, I doubt I would have been raised in a settled system. If they tried, I would have just been taken away from them, and they'd have been put in jail... So I probably would have been raised as a pirate..."

Charlotte tilted her head. "You said pirates are hunted down and exterminated. Would you have been hunted?"

That question made Scott stop and think a little longer. What kind of childhood could he have had living on a pirate ship? Instead of studying to be an explorer, would he have just become another pirate? Eventually, he stopped and answered. "Yeah, I suppose I could have been..."

Charlotte was staring at him, and Scott felt she was weighing his words carefully. "Then is it possible that your parents lied to you to protect you, like you said some humans do?"

Looking back at what he'd experienced growing up, how his mother had always been supportive, almost doting, and all the stories his father had told him, Scott wondered. But if his father had been lying to protect them, why had he left them and returned to being a pirate? Wasn't Scott more important than being a pirate?

He wasn't sure, but maybe he could forgive his mom. For all her faults, and there were many, at least she seemed sincere in trying to protect and raise her family. His father, though... Scott pulled out his pendant and looked at it. He'd worshiped the ground that man walked on, but he hadn't died like his mom had told him. He'd left them to become a pirate again. He gripped the pendant tighter, so tight it hurt.

In a surprise moment that left Scott dumbfounded, Charlotte reached out one of her scythed arms and patted him gently on his side with the flat of one of the blades. In confusion, Scott looked up at her. "What..?"

Charlotte looked down at him. "Alice has informed me that when a human leaks saline from their eyes, it means they are crying, and the best solution to crying is a form of physical contact called a hug. This self is not designed well for hugs, so this was the closest approximation I could manage."

Touching his face, Scott was surprised to learn there were indeed tears. The combination of his overwhelming feelings and Charlotte's absurd gesture made him shake his head and laugh, though he wasn't sure if the laugh held more humor or pain.

After a while, the laughter faded, and he sat like that, trying to process everything for several minutes while Charlott's scythe arm rested on his shoulder.

After several more moments, Charlotte spoke again. "Scott, have you ever lied to me?"

That made Scott blink as the abrupt change in subject ripped him out of his emotional turmoil. He thought back for a moment, trying to remember all their interactions. "Uhhh, no, I don't think so."

Charlotte then looked down at him, which was somewhat awkward from this angle. "Then you would probably not make a very good pirate."

This time, Scott's laughter was more genuine as he shook his head. "No...no, I suppose I wouldn't!"