NotSoHero

“Ahhhhh!” wooosh

“Hey come back villain!” woosh swing “Is your side okay Lily? I have nearly ended mine, just one more push.”

“Ah yes, I’m -BONG- fine, splash!”

Splash? What splash? As I gave a quick glance, I could see small and large pools of blood here and there, some containing corpses, some, body parts. At least, they all had lumpy heterogeneous mush of bone and meat in their center, making it all quite artistic in a sense.

“Hey! Be careful! How are we supposed to give subjugation proof when the said evidence is gone. Not to remind you, but we need something to clearly identify them afterward!”

Splash “ARGH!!!!” 

OHHH!!! What a lovely red, here’s an arm for you. I was skeptical at first, when she said she would use a mass instead of her staff for the time being, but she seems to have mastered it quite well and she actually has no problem being on the forefront despite her rare specialty. Well, given her proficiency with the spoon, I shouldn’t have doubted.

“Easier said than done, you don’t have this concern! You’re a man so they don’t try to harass you or take you alive so they can rape before selling you as a sex slave. My innocence is at stake here!!” Lily responded with a very serious tone and a concerned face.

Well I don’t think you have anything to lose here, you threw it away yourself when you asked me in marriage ... .no, even before perhaps knowing the sister, this girl was certainly stained at an early age.

“BITCH, how dare you!, my dominant arm!! Give it baaaccckkkk! Woosh. You have the nerve to impute me! Strike. Not talking about masturbating properly, I won’t be able to write sweet love letters and poems to my favored prostitute Rosa now! AHHHH just thinking about it makes my blood boil! Wait for me, I'll make you my slave and train you well! Hehehe <3 don’t worry I’ll be gentle.” An imposing angry man, whose arm was no more, forcibly interrupted our talk and practically jumped on Lily, like a beast in furry.

I see what she means, they are truly lost cases. So what, if you lost a limb? If you die, you won’t be able to taste her body either… nor write to your lover, even if I wonder why’d you fuss over it.

BANG, Bong

“I’ll show you everything there is to know, teach you how to use your hands, your head, and your whole being!”

“Humf! Stay away from me, dirty pig! If your remaining hand comes near, let alone masturbation and writing, don’t even dream about imposing yourself on anyone, except a dead body, if you know how to aim well lol!”

“Stop worrying about others, savor your remaining freedom, I’ll make good use of your body and mind!” SPLASH

Wow, it’s not gone, but the angle it makes with the body leaves little hope for future full recovery, you should take care of it right away buddy… 

“Told ya, stupid beast.”Lily seemed overjoyed by the spectacle she was taking part in with enthusiasm. The man was not, his gait was pathetic and he was at death's door, yet, he didn’t care about his condition at all.

“AHHHHH! Now I’m angry, I wanted to be nice, but I think I’ll train you all night long without any rest hehe! Until you beg me to let you sleep and even there I’ll make sure you dreamed of it! It doesn’t matter if I become a torso man, cuz you will be my tool.”

Can’t you die already? It’s tiring at the end. If all our enemies today were this obsessed and resilient, I wouldn’t have bet on our side.”

“Boss! Andy is done for! He lost his mind...and both arms. We need help!”

“Can’t you see my hands are already full there? Why are you even looking at them, do something yourselves, idiots! Restrain that bitch, are you men or losers? Don’t mind the dead, they were wastes anyway, just think about this girl’s body into your embrace, It's a one in a million chance! You wouldn't want to miss this opportunity, would you? And remember, only the survivor's name will be known!”

“YES SIR!” Like a single man, a shared answer came in concert.

Ohhh! They’re fired!! Is a sexy body in front of you, a little promise of greatness, and lot’s of perverse thoughts, all you need to defy death?… Well, I did the same against the demon queen and it worked just fine… But it’s different! I’m the hero while they’re nobody, how can they use a secret skill right away when it took me a great deal only to learn it and I had to polish it throughout my adventure!! 

“You pervert! Why are you targeting my chest Uh?” Lily’s flustered voice kept distracting my attention and stopped me from focusing on my own target.

“But ma’am… When we were going for the legs or thighs, you said we were lecherous bastards, disgusting feet enjoyers when targeting the ankles with ropes, armpits fetishists when going to your arm and rapists for the rest of the body. You even prevent us from trying to attack the head saying that a girl's pretty face is as important as her life and we can’t be called men anymore if we damage it. What are we supposed to do? We are not even trying to restrain and catch you at this point, just killing you before we’re all dead!”

Splash!

 “SHUT UP! You are trying to manipulate and disturb my thoughts!? Saying immoral words so I surrender and give my body away, right? Too bad for you, that won’t work on me, I’m in complete sound mind!”

One less moron, but the biggest one is still well and fine, in top form I would even say. Sound mind? Her? MY ASS!

“Kyaaaa!?” Suddenly, Lily shouted loudly while striking a strange and embarrassed pose, holding her long nun’s scapular with that was scratched to the extreme with both hand 

What’s now? Did they finally lose it, and stop their hopeless offensive aptempts? Even if it means dying, you might as well do as she said, try to enjoy and molest her. At least you will be able to savor your last moment, right before turning into minced meat... Or did one go crazy and open to nudism all of a sudden, may--…  … WHAT THE HECK? 

“Yu fon’t efcape! Fu arf minef!”

Did this madman just try to… No, he totally did it. Something utterly stupid was happening before my eyes.

“STOP BITING MY DRESS!! You’ll damage it or worse, drool on it!!” BANG BONG SLPOOSH! The offender was hung on Lily’s clothes solely by the strength of his jaw and teeth, refusing to release the fabric despite the violent blows attempting to stop his degenerate move.

Hey isn’t he the one who lost both arms earlier? Is he some sort of immortal? A zombie? 

RIP “Arggbl…. -cough- ...I’m dying…” Finally, the dress gave up, just before the man. What did you expect honestly? 

“I won’t be able to see her one last time….ouch… ah… Estel my love… I’ll miss you. I’ll hope you will find another man in your life...”  sigh

And no, you aren’t! A dying man can’t speak so long when amputated both arm...and legs. Ultimately, he did become limbless like he said, what a bad taste of fate. And wasn’t his lover’s name Rosa, why did it change all of a sudden?

“Even if I die, I’ll make you take responsibility! Argggg” groan

How so? You have relations in the after world perhaps? If so, can you introduce me to some before parting away? I’m greatly interested.

“So you say! There is no way I would even pray for your soul, I don’t know what you want from me but as the French say, va mourire ailleurs si j’y suis¹ literally meaning ‘Go die elsewhere, see if I were there’, word play with the french idiom ‘va voir ailleure si j’y suis’ meaning leave me alone !!” 

Wasn’t it va voir ailleurs? And that’s my forte to use french idiom! Don’t take away the little nice personality I had left at least! 

“NOO!!! Please! uhg. I don’t have anyone else to ask, pr.. cough promise m..me that you will write her letter in my stead… Normal one will suffice… cough-cough, she has no one else to correspond with, I was the only one who had letter studies that she knew of… And if you can, a love poem as my last wish. To tell her all my love and sorrow, that I won’t be able to meet her again… please give her my farewell… sigh”

“….Oh…”

THAT’S WHY???

“I only wanted to teach you to write fine sentences as if it were me….”

Not due to Lily's irresistibly tempting slutty body, not by frustration, cuz you lost to a little girl? You just threw away all chance of escaping death yourself, after losing only an arm! All for what?  DID YOU JUST COMMIT SUICIDE, LOSING ALL YOUR REMAINING LIMBS, BECAUSE YOU WOULD NO LONGER BE ABLE TO WRITE PROSE TO A GIRL YOU DON’T EVEN REMEMBER THE NAME!!

“Hey, you shouldn't divert your attention here, that's dangerous in a fight you know.” SLASH 

And you, you shouldn’t remember your opponent of that in the first place. You’re not better yourself, didn’t you lose 2 buddies. To use your words, mobs, because you had lustful eyes on Lily in the middle of the fight and stopped covering for them just early? And 3 more as you were trying to peek under her skirt?

Well anyway, It’s time to put an end to this animal fight. There’s not a single one decent, the boss was already struggling keeping me at bay with his henchmen, now that they’re gone, and the ones threatening Lily being splashed pretty much everywhere. All that remains is that average boss of them, barely knowing how to use a sword. The danger which I paid attention to, that’s to say, by having Lily taken hostage and used against me. Has more or less disappeared. Unless she throws herself into it----

“kyaaa! Ah, ugh… Watch out hero, hmph…  The floor is slippery, ahh. -panting- I just slipped on something as I was going to come, hmm.” Lily interrupted my thought with yet another shouting, and sexy pose, but moaning and panting like she just had a run. She almost fell and had trouble managing her balance.

That’s likely to be skulls and brain residue..apart from strawberry milkshake I don't see what else it could be? And don’t use terms that could be misinterpreted please… I really thought you were cumming for a moment. Well, at least she finished on her side, it seems the remaining opponent met their end shortly after the limbless man did. It was fast, they probably hastened their death to escape suffering. 

“Don’t move and let me take care of the re—” SLIP

“Ah!!!” Fa-thud!  “Uggh, can’t you pay attention?, I told you I was coming.”

It wasn’t me.

“HEY, where do you think your hands are? I don’t mind it, but that’s not the time!”

“I said It wasn’t me, YOU idiot!”

“Hehe, I don’t know what you did to god in order to make him take my side, but thank you”

fondle fondle 

“I’m not an idio—KYAAAAA!!! Remove your dirty hand from my ass!”

“Hey! bas les pattes² Hands off , dirty bastard, she is not someone you can afford!”

What if she falls in love!! It’s a risk given her tendency. Can you stand it? Can he? I don’t think anyone can last a day without smashing his skull on a rock or suffering from a lasting mental disorder. Eventually, her sis will come to find you and...what?  I don’t even want to think about it.

“Now listen to me, put away your weapon and… Well I don’t know yet, but do that first, yes, drop down that sword boy!”

 “Tch... What a hassle, what a burden.”

“I’m no—”“Shut up!” Lily, still more concerned about what we call her than the situation, was trying to correct me without succeeding in finishing her sentence.

“ Stay still, you are my hostage, understood? One wrong move from either you or your boyfriends here, and I’ll cut something. But maybe I should strip you beforehand to prevent any attempt hehe… Anyway, you, the hero or something, leave without turning around and don’t come back until tomorrow midday. Give me the time to have a little fun with this dead weight, you can retrieve her later on. If she’s not broken, that’s it. Otherwise, you could always recycle her into an onahole afterwards. As long as you don’t mind another man semen hehe.”

That's all? You let me live, let me go, while we are not even that far from the city. I could return at any time with help while you’re making your affair you know… I don’t even need the guard, I can totally just hide myself, wait for you to lower your pants and kill you, d*ck in the wind! 

“I’…” mumble mumble

“So vulgar…, thanks but I’ll do without it. I don’t like going second. And even if she is useless, she is my friends (well, not only, she’s unconditionally my wife), I definitely can’t let you–” 

 “I’m NOT useless!” SNAP!!!

“

AHHHrghb!”

One finger of the hand that was on her ass was cut short. Why the spoon, again? Can’t you use a proper weapon when your life… well, maybe not your life? When your maidenhead is at risk? 

“I’m NOT A DEAD WEIGHT” BIM!

“HIIIII-yelp OWW!!” groan

The face.

“I’M NOT A BURDEN, OR AN HASSLE!” BAM, BOOM, CRACK!!

Both lower limbs, ♪bim bam boom ♪♫ . . . a devil’s melody cam to mind while the torture beating continued.

CHOP, one hand less. CRACK CLACK one arm in piece, completely bent.

“shtop Iarghhh, I bfeg fyou!”sob sob

He was no longer a man, but a simple pile of flesh.

“AND ABOVE ALL, I’M NOT HIS FRIENDS, I’M HIS WIFE!!” BANG BIM BOOM!!!

“EILL FME! FMERCY! OINK!” 

♪ POP♫ a distinct bursting sound reached my ears.

“SQUEEEEK!!!!! SQUEEEK!!!!!”

And now, a pile of flesh who lost his manhood…. 

On that, I looked away, forcing myself to ignore the painful cries asking for death, from a former man who has been denied everything he had.  There, I too, awaited my punishment with bravery. And got in a repentance position. 

… … … Kidding, I’m not a fool. I urgently need to find something before it's too late. Quick! Think!

At this exact moment, supplicating God was the only thing that came to mind. ‘At least… she had no heels.’ I thought while making a cross movement and offering my prayer, asking for forgiveness to a higher being .

Yet, this turned out to be very useful. A sweet warmth covered me, making me feel good and reassured, god, did you have pity on me? This is a sign! A sign that what I just imagined next, is a must!

“Hey Lily!”

“You! Don’t move from there, you’re next. Here, I can’t share the one I use, but I still have a few, if you want to prepare you can already stab yourself, it would save us time.”

A few? Oh my god, she has more than one? Did she rob a whole restaurant or something?

“Choose the ones you want neatly, cuz you won’t avoid it this time, personally, I’d recommend the teaspoon, it’s easy to handle for a first time. Make sure to plant them where It hurt the most, they’ll stay there until I’m statisf—mhhhh” 

One more reason to make it so it won’t happen. Hopefully, a deep french kiss will suffice.

“Mhhh—ahhh!! Let me catch my breath, and it won’t save y—”

If one isn’t enough, two will! 

pat stroke “—mhhhhh—” moan

One hand stroking her hair with a gentle touch, the other holding her neck and preventing her from separating. I resumed my action, not even letting me or her inhale. Forcing the kiss as my life depended on it, for a very long time… yes, just the right amount. More precisely, the time it takes to send someone into the realm of dreams. Shortage of oxygen didn’t make me wait, and as my lips turned blue,  dizziness appeared and my strength left.

“Mhhh—” bang

Will it be enough? I was at my limit and couldn’t help myself from crumbling down. I hope it was...

“Hey why did you stop! I was just starting to enjoy… Hey, did you faint?  What got into him, what a shithead, he could at least conclude and take me forcibly. I’m all ready and wet, tch…” A frustrated voice was heard as I blacked out.

“Never mind, I'll just do as usual and do it myself…wha!…why...su...ddent…fuz...y” flop, thud

“Outch!!”

I’m not too much of an M, fainting by lack of air? No thank you. Melting a sleeping pill with my saliva was the easy step, passing it down by kissing her, while making sure that she wasn’t aware of my attempt, was not. Because I didn’t use my experimental drug, and it was a simple plain sleeping pill, she could’ve probably detoxed herself if she found the problem early on. 

Well, somehow it worked, I merely wish she didn’t fall on me while I was also laying on the ground, catching my breath.

I may need to find another solution. Escaping the consequences by myself, or drugging the reason, that won’t get me far. She has already started experimenting on sleeping drugs lately. I'm afraid that if I keep it ongoing, she will spend her life’s work on the subject. At some point, she will find a way to forcibly awake the person, even if I use my divine mixture. I should keep it as an escape route for absolute necessity.

Maybe I should play the trash but domineering husband. But again, this will only work if I play the husband part first… 

We were a week after my last convalescence, on our way to finally start our adventure after fully settling down and agreed upon how to proceed. I drugged a girl for the first time without her knowledge, just so I could escape punishment and I nearly suffocated by doing so.