Naruto: Tango with Death

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"Tani?"

The merchant looked down at me as we unloaded our merchandise right next to the kitchens, and I asked, "I didn't really get to ask, but what is the big occasion for? I didn't really get to follow with everything that happened."

A look of pity flashed on his face, but as he came to the explanation his pity turned into admiration, "Emissaries from the Land of Water are here to congratulate the new Daimyo. As it is his first banquet, the Great Leader wants to make this a grand event that spread on several days."

The Great… Leader. Okay. Something I'm missing.

"I'm curious, Tani-san. If he is the Great Leader, why shouldn't I see him? My mother thought he was my father, he wouldn't…"

Tani's face turned terrified as he exclaimed, "By the sages, no! The Great Leader is kind, merciful, and the chosen one!"

Oh, so we're going for a Cult of personality. Getting Mao vibes around here.

Tani placed a hand over his head, and another on my shoulder as he said, "Serving the Great Leader would be the greatest honor of your life, of anyone's. But if you come forward as his bastard, you would only suffer."

Scratching my cheek, I replied sheepishly, "I didn't mean to do that, I just wanted to see how he looked, and what kind of person he was. I mean, I know he is great, he is the Great Leader after all…"

Gotta blend in, gotta blend in.

Tani sighed, "The Great Leader would love to take in such a beautiful girl as you, but his wife is another matter altogether."

He got closer and whispered, "Don't let anyone hear this, but she is very jealous. She has killed and skinned multiple beautiful girls because the Great Leader only looked at them. If you went there, she would hurt you because of your face. And if she ever learned that you could possibly be the Great Leader's child, even the Sages wouldn't be able to protect you."

Alright, so I'm not killing a pedo, I'm killing a dictator. Potato potahto.

Still, this was… surprising. Not because I misread the situation, but how Kiri actually managed to do this. It takes time to build an image for a leader and turn him into an idol, especially when they aren't one.

This means Kiri must have been working on the Land of Forests for months, at least, to give the current Daimyo his reputation. So it was odd Konoha didn't catch onto anything and didn't reply in anyway.

We quickly finished unloading the products, funnily enough I carried the lightest things despite being the strongest. But they don't know that. And it makes it even funnier.

I am diabolical.

Anyway, it's time to go against every instinct I learned in Korean dramas and go provoke the bat-shit crazy queen and kill the king. Yay, so much fun.

Before I could go on though, Tani grabbed me by the arm, and said, "We should go, Takayama. I don't want you to get killed for nothing."

I shifted away from his palm and smiled as I reassured him, "Don't worry, I don't even know whether I'll be taken or not. Maybe I won't even get to see him. In any case, thank you for bringing me all the way here."

Tani sighed, placing a hand on my head for a moment before nodding. As he got on his carriage, he paused for a moment, before saying, "I'll be at my friend's inn for the festivities, so if you ever need any help, come there, alright?"

I nodded, and waved him goodbye as he left the palace, another carriage coming in to deliver even more food. Tani was a good man, if not a little irresponsible.

Well, he's not my problem anymore.

I approached the least amiable servant overseeing the cargo, a woman who had been yelling at basically everyone and who was avoided like the plague.

I arrived in front of her and bowed as I said, "Hello, my name is Takayama Kakume, and I would like to become a servant for the Daimyo."

She looked stunned for a moment, and after a second she replied, "Hum, no."

What? She refused to hire a complete stranger? My god I'm shocked, all of my plans are ruined! If only I was in a fanfiction and everything went my way… wink wink. (Not targeting anyone, or am I?)

That was a joke, of course. I didn't expect her to agree readily.

"All I want is a chance. Could you bring me to the Great Leader, or anyone capable of hiring me?"

She frowned and grunted, "Do you think anyone can just come in and become a servant for the palace? Scram before I have you thrown out."

As she said that, she also threw her arms around, and making sure no one was watching too closely, I suddenly cried out loudly as he threw myself to the ground, slapping myself while doing so.

The servant froze, her hand still raised in the air, while our surroundings got quiet. For additional impact, I whimpered while on the ground, loud enough for everyone to hear, but not so much that it sounded fake.

The servant reacted after a few seconds and cursed, "You little…"

"What is happening here!"

An angry voice interrupted her, and stealing a glance towards said voice I spotted a guard walking over here, his face looking incomparably angry.

Raising my head little to let him see the red mark on my cheek, as well as me barely holding back my tears, I practically whispered, "I only a job after my mother died…"

Pity 1000!

The guard looked at me in pity, but the servant lost it as she said through gritted teeth, "You little bitch! How dare you…"

She suddenly stopped as the guard slammed the butt of his spear with force against the ground, his pity now fuelling his anger as he uttered, "Do you have no shame, hitting an orphan child for no reason?! Do not forget that you represent the Daimyo, and you are humiliating the Great Leader!"

The servant took a step back in fear, but still argued, "I didn't touch her!"

The guard angrily pointed at my face and growled, "Then we all saw wrong? She just hit herself!"

Right at this moment, I used one of my low ranked jutsus, which I had devised from my Tenketsu, an E Rank Genjutsu.

'Genjutsu: Muddle Headed!'

My naming sense wasn't the best, I know, but at least it described what the jutsu did. The servant's eyes turned glazed for a split second as she replied with a mutter, "She did."

I immediately cast off my illusion, and the servant returned to normal. However, before she could even properly realize what she had just said, the guard started releasing killing intent as he growled, "I would have taken your head if it wasn't a day of festivities."

He turned to look at me, his killing intent nearly completely subsiding as he asked, "You said you were searching for a job as a servant here?"

Since there were still some trace of his killing intent, I gulped in what appeared to be fear before clenching my jaws and nodded.

The guard nodded back and said, "Good, a place just freed itself."

Next to us, the servant's eyes widened comically, but she didn't dare to say anything as the guard's killing intent remained deeply imprinted into her.

She looked at me in extreme anger, but did not say anything to me anymore as she bowed to the guard and asked, "May I gather my belongings and say goodbye to some of my friends before leaving?"

The guard snorted softly and replied, "Fine, you have until tomorrow morning to leave. If I see you after that, don't blame me if I turn violent too. I don't hit women, but one capable of hitting a child is no woman to me."