Naruto: Reborn as Sakura with Manyuu Chifusa Template

Sakura tensed up as the gigantic white hydra reared all seven of its remaining heads.

Despite the hype, Orochimaru's ultimate form remained entirely without feats, having been defeated mere seconds after its one and only appearance. One could say that the Orochimaru of the original timeline was a rather unfortunate fellow— or perhaps, one might say his many failures were his just desserts for the karma he had accumulated.

Ironically, for all the knowledge he boasted of having amassed, it had always been some gap in that knowledge that had led to the original Orochimaru's most abject failures, of which there have been three major examples:

His first mistake was underestimating Itachi's Mangekyō Sharingan.

Had he not simply strolled up and demanded the thirteen-year-old boy hand over his eyeballs, he might very well have triumphed over a young, still-immature Itachi. Had he won, perhaps the Akatsuki wouldn't have been so quick to kick him out of the organisation and chase him halfway across the world.

His second mistake was looking down on his teacher, the Third Hokage.

Believing himself to have mastered everything the Hidden Leaf had to offer, never in his wildest dreams could he have imagined a forbidden Fūinjutsu powered by an invisible Shinigami. What's more, he failed to account for his teacher's willingness to sacrifice his eternal life to protect the village. Had he not played with his food, he would have certainly triumphed without injury.

And his third mistake once again came at the hands of Uchiha Itachi.

Having clearly not learned his lesson, he once again underestimated him. Unluckily, Itachi had found the Sword of Totsuka (though to be fair, Orochimaru couldn't have possibly known that), and despite his Eight Branches Jutsu transforming him into a gigantic hydra, he ended up sealed once more.

Orochimaru's pride and thirst for knowledge were no less fierce in this timeline, and would very likely once again be the cause of his eventual downfall. But even if it was a path that led to his certain death, he would never stop until he had mastered every Jutsu in the world and attained true immortality.

Pride indeed comes before a fall, but even so, Orochimaru truly is a man among men— except when he's occupying a woman's body. In which case, he's a femboy among femboys.

Or something along these lines.

"Eww…" said Sakura, pulling a face as one of the hydra's heads unhinged its jaw and vomited up the slimy, naked upper half of Orochimaru's human body. "That's, like, so gross."

With an exhausted Yamato draped over his shoulders, Naruto leapt onto Katsuyu, landing beside Sakura and Sasuke on the giant slug's head. Despite Katsuyu's enormous size, the Yamata-Hydra still towered over them, blotting out the sun with one of its heads.

"How very nostalgic," Orochimaru sniggered, looking down at Team 7 from the comfort of his serpent body's mouth. "Watching you three, I can't help but reminisce about the time we three faced down the Salamander… If he hadn't spared us, the Legendary Sannin would never have come to be…"

Orochimaru was buying time, indulging in Talk-no-Jutsu to keep his opponents from attacking him while he was vulnerable.

Sustaining this colossal form was extremely draining; of the three Sannin, he had always possessed the least chakra, even after conducting countless experiments on himself. Yet what he lacked in reserves, he made up for in staying power. As long as he had food, his stamina would rebound at an astonishing rate, a benefit of his deep foray into cellular activation techniques.

"Oi, where do you get off, acting all nostalgic? You cloned me without my permission, you bastard!" Sakura shouted at him furiously. "Get him, Katsuyu!"

"Yeah!" Naruto shouted in assent. "…wait, what's a clone?"

Sakura had used the English term 'clone,' to refer to a genetic clone. The clones Naruto was used to were called 'bunshin,' or alter egos. It was a rather fitting term, as the Shadow Clone Jutsu brought forth other selves, albeit temporarily.

"As you wish, mistress!" Katsuyu called out.

Katsuyu pursed her lips and inflated herself, then unleashed a torrent of acid at the seven-headed hydra. The monstrous creature slithered aside with surprising speed for its immense bulk. The acidic stream splattered uselessly against the ruined bathhouse, turning stone and mortar into hissing smoke.

"Oh?" Orochimaru's voice echoed across the battlefield, sounding rather amused. "Since when has asking for permission mattered in this world? You're certainly not one to talk, Uchiha… Sakura."

The Orochimaru-Hydra plunged its tail into the ground and started writhing rhythmically, generating an earthquake that made Katsuyu's soft body and Sakura's breasts start to shake like pudding. The vibrations progressively intensified, forcing Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke to lower their centre of gravity to avoid falling over.

"What's he doing!?" asked Naruto in confusion. "I—"

"Shikotsumyaku: Bracken Dance!"

The ground rumbled one last time, and in an instant, hundreds of thousands of jagged bone spikes erupted from the earth, transforming the entire battlefield into a sea of white, tortured trees. Katsuyu was skewered in multiple places… though that didn't seem to bother her much.

"Katsuyu-sama!" shouted Sakura in alarm.

"I'm fine, but I'm stuck, Milady," said Katsuyu, giving herself an experimental wiggle. "There are spikes everywhere, so I'm afraid there's not much more I can do, except offer you three somewhere to stand on…"

"The Kurama clan's blood."

"Where is he?" shouted Naruto, looking around wildly. "Orochimaru's gone!"

Somehow, the gigantic white hydra had vanished.

Sakura slid a senbon needle between her forefinger and middle finger, preparing the simplified Lorentz Gun Jutsu— but she didn't know where to aim. If her memory served her right, users of the Shikotsumyaku could phase through these bony growths, allowing them to more or less teleport between the spikes and strike from any angle.

"Senju blood."

Orochimaru's raspy voice seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere all at once. At times it was close; at others, distant. Sometimes it spoke alone, sometimes it spoke in chorus.

"Uzumaki blood."

"Keep my name out of your mouth, ya know!" shouted Naruto indignantly. "You creep!"

"Uchiha blood."

Sakura's heart leapt into her throat, gripped by a sudden feeling of foreboding. The others didn't understand what Orochimaru was trying to get at, but she did— those were the bloodlines she had collected.

"Am I missing any?" Orochimaru's sinister laughed echoed from below. "Oh, I se… you haven't told your little friends yet, have you?"

He was right underneath them!

"Katsuyu-sama, Reverse-Summon!" Sakura screamed. "All of us! NOW!"

Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke were overcome by a sensation of weightlessness as the ground ruptured beneath Katsuyu, causing them to abruptly plunge into a dark chasm below. Seven pairs of yellow eyes gleamed in the darkness around them— and without warning, bone spikes burst out from the walls of the sinkhole, closing in on them on all sides like some enormous beast's jagged fangs, shredding Katsuyu to ribbons!

Suddenly, the world turned into blur of white bone and yellow eyes and black darkness.

The spikes and fangs closed in on the spot where they had stood just moments before, but Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke, and Yamato-sensei were already gone— whisked away through space and time, the sound of Orochimaru's raucous laughter still echoing in their ears…