NOVEL NEXT Abyss Of Hysteria
[Mayuri's POV]
Mmmm... my head feels kinda light right now, Ohhhh...I see these must be Big Sis's thighs. Mmmm~ they are so soft, wanna lay my head forever upon this, but unfortunately, that would trouble our plans. This is the only time we have, this is our only chance. If we fail here, then our goal will never be realized, so we gotta work hard!.
YOSH! let's get up.
"Oh?! Mayu, you awake already? sleep a bit more"
Big Sis is being considerate, even though I kinda ruined our plan for today. That's why she's the best, and why, I have to give it my all.
"No, Big Sis. I am fine now, thank you for your help"
"It's fine, it's fine, but stay home today, for my sake. So, I will go back to university now"
Shit! but I wanted to go back...... huh? FUCK! there it is again! I thought of something that is against Big Sis's wishes. Why is it happening? All I know is that it started when my mind started thinking of all these unnecessary stuff, earlier these thoughts didn't even exist in the abyss of my mind, but now, it's like these thoughts which are opposite to Big Sis always appear in my head.
Am I really becoming abnormal? ......NO! that's impossible! if I am abnormal then everyone else is this world is also abnormal. I know that I am a Devil but that's normal! there are many Devils in this world, so is every one of them abnormal? Of Course Not!
Yes! I am normal! There's nothing wrong with me.
Mother didn't leave me because of my freakish nature, yeah...Yeah! she didn't leave because of me! it's her own fault she left!
Big Sis will also not leave me. Big Sis knows that there's nothing strange with me.
'But Big Sis left me, all alone, for three weeks'
STOP! I didn't think that! I am not thinking of something like this! I am not! I cannot!
'She came back, but...... what if she didn't?'
No thinking! No thinking! No thinking! brain shut up!
'What if Big Sis also becomes like Mother?'
Crap! Crap! Crap! can't let that happen, definitely can't let that happen! I need to ask her! I need to confirm it!
"Big Sis, am I abnormal?" please say no, say no, say no, say no!
"WHA?! Mayu! what are you thinking?! Of course not! Where did you even get that thought?!" Big Sis got a bit angry, but it made me happy. Big Sis is not like Mother, Big Sis is not Mother. Big Sis is just Big Sis, and she will always treat me with love. I am normal for Big Sis, so I am normal for everyone else too.
"Yeah, sorry for suddenly asking something strange like this"
"Well, no problem...... but! don't ask such stupid question from now on!" Big Sis's eyes are warm.
"Yes, I will make sure" Big Sis's is warm
"Well then, you just rest here. I will be going to my class now, You want anything when I come back, Mayu?"
"Nope, I will just rest" can't let Big Sis take more burden than she already has
"Well then, later Mayu" ...... and Big Sis is gone.
...
Well, I guess I should sleep now.
'Big Sis is lying'
Huh!? I am thinking of strange things again.
'Big Sis is lying'
Just ignore it, I am not thinking anything.
'Big Sis is lying'
Just ignore it
'Big Sis is lying'
Ignore it
'Big Sis is lying'
Ignore!
'Big Sis is lyi—'
NO! she isn't, she isn't, she can't!. Her eyes were genuine, Her face was warm! she isn't lying!
'I know Big Sis is lying to me, but I am too afraid to admit it'
AHHHH! get out of my head!, STOP. *SMACK* THINKING. *SMACK*
'How long can I run away from thi—' *SMACK*
STOP *SMACK* THINKING *SMACK*
'Look how cowardly I have bec—'*SMACK*
STOP *SMACK* THINKING *SMACK*
'I am just like mothe—' *SMACK*
STOP *SMACK* THINKING *SMACK*
'...' *SMACK*
STOP *SMACK* THINKING *SMACK*
Ahhh~ thank *SMACK* god, those *SMACK* thoughts went away, seems like *SMACK* it is good for me to *SMACK* hit my head against the wall *SMACK*.
AHhhhh! such peace... *SMACK*, no more strange thinking... *SMACK* just the sound of me banging... *SMACK* the wall, it sounds quite soothing... *SMACK*. Hmmm... such a calm *SMACK* atmosphere.... surrounds me. It seems like I found the solution... *SMACK* to this overthinking.
*SMACK* Just keep banging *SMACK*, it's nice stress relief, maybe I should do this every day? *SMACK*
*SMACK* .........*SMACK*......................*SMACK* .......................................*SMACK*
...
"THUMP*...... Hmm? the cold floor, also ........... fells................good
Need...........rest–.
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[Mehak's POV]
"so this is it, huh?"
"Yup, Jyoti. Isn't it cool?"
"No! it's just freaky."
"Shut up! you don't know art!"
"So? why is Mayuri banging her head against the wall?"
"She's trying to stop thinking"
"Maybe she's more freaky than you, so you say after this she will forget everything?"
"Yup, her mind should probably return to that time, before she asked me the 'am I abnormal' question"
"Well, it's hard to believe, but nothing's impossible with you two"
[Mayuri's POV]
My head feels cold, it's not comfortable. Wasn't I just laying on top of Big Sis's thighs? ......AH! she said she was going back to university.
But what should I do now? Big Sis just went away, she should be back my evening I think.
Hmmm? what's this? my head hurts for some reason, it's really painful in the forehead region. What happened while Big Sis carried me back from University to home? Did Big Sis accidentally drop me? ......
Jeez! that's why I always tell her to take it easy. Her constant stress is even making her movements wobbly now. I should properly reprimand her when she gets back home, it's good to be serious but Big Sis is being very serious or extremely serious which is not good for her health, it will also bring nothing good in the end.
I should prepare a heating bag for my forehead, it's going to swell otherwise.
...
Hmm? Awwww! Big Sis already prepared a Heating Bag for me. So I did fell while coming back from university, and while I was asleep she prepared this for me... how sweet of her.
I should probably lie down on the bed now and rest for a while
.
.
.
'Big Sis is going to leave me'
Mmmmmm!.....Shhhhhhhhhhh!
'Big Sis left me all alone again, she may not come back now'
Eeeeeeeeeeee! *sob* *sob* she will, she definitely willllllll *sob*
that was just one time *sob*, she will not do anything like that again *sob* *sob* she isn't like that
'She didn't even give me a single phone call while she was away, giving me excuses like there's no reception there'
*sob* *sob* please don't think these things, please don't, don't, I want to go back*sob**sob*, I want to go back to high school*sob* I didn't think of these wicked things back then *sob*
I want to go back *sob* I don't want to grow up *sob*
'Big Sis and mother, they are all same. I couldn't hold Mother back but am I going to allow the same thing for Big Sis?'
*sob* *sob* *sob* I can't stop these thoughts anymore
'Should make sure that Big Sis doesn't go away'
*sob* why am I thinking such cruel things towards Big Sis?
'Should cut her contact with the outside world, those people influence Big Sis in the wrong way'
Big Sis is free, *sob* I won't do that, in the first place Big Sis is not *sob*like that
'Should cut Big Sis's legs so that she can't go anywhere without me'
*sob* No! No! get out of my head! I don't want this!
'Should hurt anyone who comes near Big Sis, but first should stop these fake tears'
Stop! Stop! Shut up! Shut up!
'I am not even crying, so why sound sympathetic? am I trying to gather sympathy?'
I am crying! I am really crying, See! *sob**sob *. I am not just making these noises!
'Did I just say *sob**sob*? how cute, even I am laughing at this'
hahahaahaha, no I am not laughing! ahahahahaah
'hahahahahahahaha, yes I am!'
hahahahahahaa *GRIP!*
'hahahaha, why am I choking my neck?'
Help.......Stop.......Thinking
'I am going to die'
No......I......AM......Not
...
[Mehak's POV]
...
...
"Hmm, so Mayu♥ choked herself to sleep"
"She really did forget everything. So? is she even going to forget this?"
"Nope, she just forgets the whole 'abnormal' things. She simply doesn't want to admit that she's not normal"
"Why?"
"If I have to make a guess, probably her mother"
"Her mother? now that I come to think about it, you never told me about her childhood"
"And I will not, until Mayuri's ready to confront it. When she's ready to confront her mother, I will tell you"
"Why confront her?"
"That's probably the first step towards improving her condition, she can't get her problems with her mother out of the head. She keeps denying that it's not a problem, but one day I will make sure she acknowledges it as a problem"
"And when will that day be?"
"When her condition has reached its peak"
"What to do till then?"
"Till then, just carefully observe Mayu and find her mother"
"Hmm, so you are really going to find her?"
"Hahaha, how cute of you to say 'YOU', it's 'WE'. We are going to find Mayu's mother"
"No! I am not!"
"Then stop calling your parents. You ParentCon!"
"WHA!? I have to tell them! otherwise, they would cook my food and get worried. I will not be back for a few days, finding her mother is going to take time"
"Well, aren't you an open tsundere"
"Stop calling me with these weird titles! I don't even know what the mean! you crazy bitch. Both of you are crazy!."
"Well don't say that now, Jyoti. Isn't it thrilling to see Mayu's violence?"
"Go to hell"
"Going there anyways"
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[Mayuri's POV]
Hmm? how much time passed since I went back to sleep?
Ouch! that strangling really hurt, but at least those evil thoughts are gone now. Hmm, it's already evening, Big Sis should be coming back anytime now.
But man these thoughts really take a toll on me. I need to get myself back together, just like the old days.
First, let's start by realizing the problem. Stress? Nope
Tension? Nope
Anxiety? Nope
Any abnormal behavior? Nope
Overthinking? Yup!
Hmm, so overthinking is the problem here, but how did I start overthinking? I didn't use to do this earlier? is it because of the growing age? is because Big Sis and I were apart for 3 weeks? No, that can't be the reason, I got my fill of Big Sis when she came back. In fact, the one in the problem was Big Sis, she dismantled most of my dolls and even beat up that drunk guy who bumped into her, but now she's all good! except for that over-working of course!.
So how did I start overthinking? am I missing something crucial here?
am I lying to myse....NO! THAT! CAN'T BE IT!
yes! yes! that's not the case! why would I lie to myself? yup! that doesn't make sense!
then what!?
My legs are also starting to feel tired.
.
.
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More than two hours have passed, Big Sis should be back home now, so why isn't she coming back?
There are so many fucking problems! I can't find the solution to this overthinking! For some reason, my legs are hurting really bad! I am getting really tired! It's like all of my stamina is flowing away from me! Big Sis is not coming back!
What Happened?!
'Should I actually, cut of Big Sis's legs?'
fuck! here it is again.
*Knock* *Knock*
AH! SHE BACK!
[Mehak's POV]
"So, Jyoti. What do you think about this?"
"Why is Mayuri, just walking into a wall?. She's been walking into it for the past two hours"
"She doesn't realize it. Her mind is probably filled with chaos right now. She doesn't even realize that she's overthinking her overthinking."
"Then isn't she just mental?!"
"Hey! watch what you say! it hurts when someone calls my Mayu like that!"
"Sorry, forgot you were mental as well"
"Hmm? what did you say?"
"Wha?! nothing"
"Hmm" ain't she getting a bit cheeky around here, but well that just proves that she's comfortable around us.
Right now, Mayu should be thinking 'Why hasn't Big Sis come back?'. She has already banged her head, choked herself and is now walking like a zombie against a wall. Mayu's condition has probably reached near peak now, just a little bit more and it should reach its utmost limit. Then little by little, I and Jyoti will help to improve her condition. Right now, we should head back to our flat, but well it's just one floor below.
"But your stalking room is really creepy"
Wha!? how dare she call it stalking room! It's just a flat in this apartment which apparently has a tv screen that shows everything that's happening inside our flat.
"It's S.U.R.V.E.L.A.N.C.E"
"or S.T.A.L.K.I.N.G"
she's getting too comfortable.
