NOVEL NEXT Chapter 1: oh no, im dead, anyway.
"hey, Aiko. Would you be willing to meet up later, me and a couple others, were thinking of going to that new bowling place in a couple hours, you down" a guy with short blond hair asked, leaning casually against my desk.
The bell had just rung, signaling the end of another mind-numbing school day. I was halfway through packing up my stuff until I paused, to glance up at him. "oh, what time were you thinking?" I asked, sliding a few notebooks into my bag before slinging it over my shoulder. Getting up in the process.
"Hold up," Haru said, quickly spinning around to talk to another one of my friends, Hannah. Their voices dipped just low enough that I couldn't make out the words, but judging by Hannah's enthusiastic nodding, I figured she was coming too. probably the one orchestrating it. She was the one to always do that. Despite her, flaws in handling it.
After a moment, Haru turned back to me, his blond hair swaying slightly. "They were thinking more like six-ish. Maybe 5 but it's a bit iffy with Miko's basketball practice. Is that a good time for you though?"
I blinked before weighing my options. My afternoons were usually spent gaming or drawing, so it's not like I had any important shit to do. And lately, most of the games I played are starting to get a bit too stale. So, maybe a change of pace wouldn't hurt. Besides, if it got boring, I could always throw up duces and dip.
"Sure, why not," I said with a small shrug while heading for the door, but before leaving I quickly turned around. "But you'd better text me the exact info. You know Hannah's terrible with directions, and telling info. It's crazy how she messes it up every time despite being so good at planning"
Haru chuckled playfully "Right, she is—ow!" he yelped as Hannah, who had clearly been listening in, gave him a light punch on the back.
"shut up, it was only 3 times." she huffed
I rolled my eyes at her defence, already tuning them out. With a small wave over my shoulder, I pushed the door open and stepped into the hallway. The sounds of Haru trying to engage with Hannah about some new gacha game in which Hannah wasn't really into but was forced to listen to by his excited nature, I silently laughed at how Rom-com-like their relationship was. (it's almost like you're fiction)
I quickly shook my head and walked out of the school their conversation no longer keeping my interest.
I took a step outside but stopped slightly as the afternoon sun shined right into my eyes, making me squint and instinctively raise a hand to shield my eyes from the blinding glare.
I paused for a moment, letting my vision adjust before looking around.
Pulling out my phone, I quickly checked the bus timetable, hoping that this time it wasn't delayed like the past 3 days it had infuriatingly had been. "darn it" I muttered under my breath as I saw that it was once again delayed for another whole fucking ass hour. Like is there a guy busting tires or something exactly when school lets out?
"Ugh," I groaned, stuffing my phone back into my pocket. After a moment's thought, I pulled it out again. "Guess I'll check out that new buffalo wings place. Heard it's good," I mused, slipping in my earbuds. Selecting my playlist of "banger anime opening" I slid my phone back into my pocket before giving out a stretch, "Maaaan, I hope they got boneless wings." I moaned before beginning my trek to the buffalo place.
---
I stopped at the sidewalk quickly glancing left and right, making sure there was no danger when I cross. I paid no mind to the fact that there were no cars, no people no nothing all around me, as I was too busy bopping my head to the beat (bling bang bang born is a bop ngl)
I stepped onto the crosswalk, my foot hitting the pavement without a second thought. The sound of a truck engine reached my ears, but I brushed it off, too caught up in the beat to really notice.
Then, the sound grew louder. Way too loud.
I turned, my eyes widening as I saw it, a fucking truck speeding toward me, its horn blaring. Like a cry of success.
I froze for a moment before.
"HOLY FUCK!" I screamed, jumping back in a desperate attempt to get out of the way, which obviously was a bad idea as it still hit me. The last thoughts going through my mind 'damn, I didn't get to try the wings. fuck.'
*SPPLATT*
---
My eyes shot open, only to be met with utter darkness. Just a blank void devoid of light. "is this hell?" i muttered in confusion.
It was the logical assumption since, i knew, i wasn't going to heaven. That place is for kind people. Not people like me, who enjoy the suffering of others. Especially for petty reasons.
I breathed out in defeat as I pushed myself up to my feet, small random useless thoughts flung around in my mind but I quickly ignored them because I couldn't be bothered to think about them now.
I looked around and like on the floor, saw nothing. "yeah, I don't know what I expected." I sighed, before picking a random direction and started walking. "maybe I'll find something" I said aloud to no one but myself.
.
.
.
---
Its been hours or maybe longer, I have no fucking clue, I can't feel anything at all so there is no way to keep track of time except manual counting, and I'd rather do anything other than counting for all eternity. "out of all the purgatory theories out there, empty void has got to be the most boring. At least suffering in hell is something. Or reincarnating as a cheese grater. Then something happens. Here it's just fucking nothing"
I sighed again, "If I weren't already fucking dead, I would have already killed myself."
Then suddenly, there was a figure, that just, popped into existence. Then, there was a voice, no idea where it came from but it sounded maaaaaale? Female? Actually. It sounded more like if someone smashed 20 different voices into 1 and called it a day.
"huh? There's someone here? Damn, he chose quick, thought I'd have a couple more years" Then the entire void completely went white, I quickly shut my eyes but realized that oh, right, I cant feel. I opened them again and I was sitting on a chair, with the figure sitting across from me.
"Hello. Sorry for the wait, but congratulations, you have been chosen by truck-kun himself to get the premium isekai experience."
"What?" I asked, in confusion, but quickly Shook my head in acceptance 'You know what, I'll roll with it.'
"so, I know I was kinda late, sorry for that, truly. But I'll explain what's going to happen, now first you're going into the MHA world, can't change that, it's fixed buuut. What you do get is 3 wishes, usually that is. But also usually those wishes have limits. But not for you, you are special. 1 wish, no limits. Whatever you want. Plus, I'll give you some extra stuff relating to your wish that you didn't think of, so if you make a wish without thinking of consequences or large weaknesses. Like a reverse monkey's paw, I'll make your wish the best it can be."
After finishing the sentence, they paused, clearly expecting me to freak out or whip up a storm of questions, but. No, I just stared at them. Blankly.
They stared a bit before awkwardly continuing. "okay, now, I'll give a bit of time to digest that since most people u-" they tried again, to let me have some time to pepper him with questions since that is what normally happens buuuuut
"no, I'm good. lets get rolling." I said cutting him off, making a finger roll gesture.
The figure froze, momentarily caught off guard. "Wait, seriously? Already?"
"yep" I said, popping the p for effect.
"well, that's perfect, makes my job a heck of a lot easier. So, what is your wish, Aiko?"
I took no time to think and quickly voiced my wish "To control every aspect of time and space at the absolute highest degree of power, with no being, entity, or force capable of overpowering me. Letting me use my power on anyone, and them unable to resist and. . . " I took a moment to think a bit more but nothing else came to mind "yeah, no, that's all."
The figure looked at me, the person who took such a small amount of time for such a big choice, and said choice was . . . amazingly well crafted compared to... most others. "huh. . . great wish. Now before you go, my little reverse monkey's paw, instead of what usually would be needed to use the powers you chose, now you won't need to think that in-depth to do something. Basically, you won't need to think as hard as can be. Just to rearrange a brick into a block of cheese. Just think of it, visualize it, and boom. cheese."
I watched him speak and felt excited as one would if they were going to be given the powers of a literal god. But I kept watching, the thought that this was a trap lingered in my mind.
After finishing he took a small pause, putting his hand in his pocket, and "Now it's been a pleasure talking to you Aiko. but first" pulled out a fucking tablet. With on the screen five buttons, 1-5 stars. Like I was rating an app on the app store.
"Could you please rate your isekai experience at the moment, was the death painful or not? Was the service good, was the wait time too long? I would love to know your feedback" he gave off a smile even though he was a white figure with no features.
Now, this caught me off guard, making me give a small breath of a laugh, shock very clearly being shown on my expression "Wai-wha-huh? ok, this is stupid." I cut my confusion short, just done with the weird situation already "Sure you were great, but the wait time was a bit too long. So" I reached over and pressed 4 stars.
"Thank you, thank you," they said with an exaggerated bow before sliding the very large tablet back into their pocket as if it were a wallet. . . this is fucking stupid. What is this? A fucking crack fic?
(oh no, she's learning)
I stared at them, utterly baffled but like nothing happened, he spoke again. Ignoring his clown-like stunt "Well, with all that settled, goodbye, I hope you enjoy your new life." he raised his hands and clapped
and with his clap, my vision instantly went blank. Just barely hearing his last words "because I sure will."
.
.
.
---
I woke up, my neck was aching as my eyes quickly shot open. The sight that befell me, was a bedroom, a bedroom that I didn't recognize. I quickly got up and realized I was on the floor like I had passed out or something. My gaze quickly darted around the room but I froze, as I looked in the mirror. There stood a half-naked girl with pale skin, and very long white hair, that turned slightly pale blue at the tips. Silver eyes, and a face that I could only describe as the most beautiful.
I reached my hand up and so did the figure in the mirror, I placed my hand on my face and it was as smooth as it could be. "Holy fuck" I whispered, my voice filled with disbelief, awe and excitement "I'm... hot"
I turned my body around, making sure to get a glimpse at my every body part, with only one thing I could say, I said it. "I get the appeal of being a narcissist. cause I love myself."
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A/N YAAAY, reboot. Remaster, whatever it's called. For those that don't know this is a re-mastery of my first ever fic, a fic that even now is my favorite. Cause it had my favorite premise. Mc does shit because why the fuck not. The reason i decided to remaster it and not continue is because it was hella cringe and hella shit. not to say this wont have some cringe but that old fic. yikes. but anyway. i hope you enjoy
also, just a warning, i do not care. I'll just do shit for the sake of it, and i get side tracked . . . quite a bit. ngl.
also, i do like to add random 4th wall breaks because why not. and alot of other random shit.
(also how funny it is, that the mc's friends call up "why is she so late and not answering" then on the news, Aiko's mangled corpse splattered on the road is shown and they all go "oooooh. she's dead." with nods of approval.)
anyway, bye bye