Magical Girls are the Best Toys 2

Act I – A Spring of Lust

Hi author here, I'll be just laying down some thoughts here. To those who don't want to read it, go ahead to the next chapter¹

You monster.

I don't actually have a plan for this. This is more of a self-reflection than anything, of the story so far and how it would go.

Truth be told, this was a side project for me to improve my writing for another story I was planning. I could say it did open my eyes to many things I need to improve on.

To those afraid, no, I’m not dropping this, at least not anytime soon. I'm enjoying myself making these chapters.

For the future, I have a rough idea of act 1 and 2, and a sketchy idea of act 3. [ I have plot set-ups sprinkled throughout the previous chapters and will continue to sprinkle more. Try to spot them and guess what the plan is😁]

Just know that the plot may progress slowly in some places. Because people are complicated

, they take time to change, they do not instantly break like in hentai or pornos. They need to challenge their current situation, fail, try something else, fail again, then after finally exhausting everything change themselves.

 

 

Things to improve

Well, the first thing I noted was my writing style having more dialogue-heavy and being a little lighthearted. I don’t know if it is a pro or con, it’s just the way I write, I guess. I want to try and change it up and see if there is a difference. Put more descriptors and stuff.

The second improvement I need. Consistency. Across chapters or even In the same chapter I feel the level of consistency varies. Some have a lot of details while others just one line. Not only that but when I leave it to the next day and I forget the feeling I was going for... especially between 2 chapters. The jump can be jarring.

Speaking of jarring, my transitions between topics needs work. Like between talking A and talking B, there needs to be some padding to give the readers time to process.

Another thing is descriptions, especially the sex. It is damn bad... I feel it is too short, I just can't find a way to extend the description and not repeat what I’ve already written in a different phrasing... Maybe I should be like those wuxia authors. Writing 5 paragraphs of the same thing when 1 is enough. Ahahaha

And lastly, the thing I most need to improve on is my writing speed. It's fucking slow. How in the world do the others churn out 1 chapter per day and I don't think they take more than 2 hours... I guess more practice writing is needed.