Lost

In the video, I was crying out in despair, like someone who had lost everything. It wasn’t a human cry but something closer to the wail of an animal.“Sunbae, do you remember why you were crying like that back then?”“Sob… hic…”Jung Woojin kissed the corners of my eyes, licking away the tears that streamed down.“You were crying because I didn’t cum inside you. You kept begging for it, but I didn’t give it to you. Look at this.”Jung Woojin grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at the screen. I was on all fours with my hips raised high. Jung Woojin wasn’t visible in the frame. The sound of crying continued endlessly. Soon, the camera moved, and Jung Woojin came into view, holding the camcorder and watching the screen. After a moment, he slowly licked his lips and approached me on the screen again. The camera refocused, showing me still sobbing with my hips in the air, now gripping my penis with both hands.— S-sorry, sorry, sob, hic, I-I’m sorry, sob, hic! Woojin, Woojin, I’m sorry, please, ahhhh!— What are you so sorry about? Don’t cry, Sunbae. You didn’t do anything wrong.— Hic, sob!The Jung Woojin on screen gently embraced me. I rubbed my cheek against his outstretched hand, like a dog seeking affection from its owner.— I’m sorry for making a mess, hic, sob! Sob, sob, hic!

— Are you sorry for making a mess? That’s not your fault. I should have held you tighter. I’m the one who’s more sorry.— No, hic! No, don’t, ah, ah, stop, stop, ahhhh!— Damn it, that’s the wrong thing to say. It’s okay to lack patience, but saying no, stop, or don’t is bad. If you say that again, I won’t cum inside you.Jung Woojin started moving his hips again. His penis appeared and disappeared between my buttocks, and with each motion, unknown fluids splattered everywhere.— This time I’ll cum inside, so say you love me.— Uh, ah, ah… hic! Ngh, ahhh!— Quickly.— I-I love, love you, love, hnnng!— Who?— Hic, ah! Woojin, I love, ahhh!— Who loves?— Sob, sob! I feel like I’m going to die, hic! Ah, ahhh! I, I love Woojin, hic! Ahhh!— How much?Jung Woojin kept asking questions. As I cried uncontrollably, completely out of my mind, he asked, and asked, and asked again.— Sunbae, how much do you love me?— Sob, sob!I stared blankly at the screen, watching myself, then squeezed my eyes shut. A suppressed sob escaped through my clenched teeth. As I silently cried, Jung Woojin, watching the screen with me, kissed my lips. Then he started rotating his hips slowly. I couldn’t even feel anything below my waist, but as he moved, a wave of pleasure began to spread, like a burst of heat.“Ahhh, ah…!”“Do you want to cry like that again?”“Huh, ah… ahh!”“Do you want to say you love me while crying?”Jung Woojin bit into the nape of my neck, whispering in a way that felt almost like brainwashing. When I didn’t respond, he began to move his hips again.His thrusts were so slow and shallow that it seemed like he was playing a joke. In fact, his expression was like that of a mischievous child, as if he didn’t care at all whether I was in pain or crying. When I closed my eyes, he persistently licked the corners of my eyes until I opened them, and when I closed my mouth, he sucked on my lips until I opened them again. The gentle voice whispering in my ear while he slowly rubbed near my prostate overlapped with the sound of my own voice pleading and moaning on the screen. I was getting confused about what was real.“You know, I noticed that every time you space out, you stare at the flower pot on the window sill?”Jung Woojin said out of the blue. When he pulled out, it felt like all the flesh inside me was being pulled out as well. It was as if my intestines were being dragged out, though that couldn’t be the case.“Ah!”“I didn’t realize it either, but now that I think about it, every day you were only looking at that flower pot. Even while eating, spacing out, or talking with me.”“Uh, ah, yes…!”Jung Woojin grabbed my ankles and lifted them up. Though I couldn’t see it, I was sure everything between my legs was a mess with precum and his semen. My joints screamed as I bit down on my lips, and Jung Woojin stroked my anus with his fingers.“It’s all swollen inside.”“Hng!”He clicked his tongue and lowered his head between my legs, now a mess with semen and fluids. Even though I didn’t have the strength to move a single finger, I mustered up all my energy and struggled as if some superhuman strength had awakened within me.“Stop it! I said stop!”“Do you remember when Da-young confessed to you right after you started university?”Even in the midst of feeling like I was dying, Da-young sunbae’s face flashed through my mind. But it had been so long since I last saw her that I couldn’t remember her clearly. She had confessed that she had feelings for me, but it had fizzled out, and we only exchanged glances occasionally when we met.“Uh, uh!”Jung Woojin licked my anus from bottom to top.“She gave you flowers she picked from the street, right?”“Stop, stop, Jung Woojin! Shi, uh!”“I didn’t know either.”“Hiii!”Jung Woojin kept making noise, licking, and sucking while talking incessantly. But I couldn’t hear what he was saying properly, drowned out by my own screams.“The flowers in the window pot, they were the same as those flowers she gave you back then. Just a different color.”“Uh, uh, ah! Hik, no, stop…! Ah!”“So I threw them away.”Jung Woojin lifted his head and again placed my legs over his shoulders. His hard member touched my already loose and relaxed anus.“It must have been a coincidence that you kept staring at that pot. Maybe you were just staring into space and I misunderstood.”“Ugh!”My already relaxed and loose anus slowly started to open again. When I opened my eyes, squeezed shut from the pain, Jung Woojin’s face was right in front of me. A drop of sweat fell from his chin onto my cheek.“When you’re with me, look at me.”“Ugh!”“Then maybe I wouldn’t have thrown that pot away.”His pubic hair brushed against the crack of my buttocks as he moved his hips with a gentle reproachful look.＊＊＊The sound of wet slapping filled my head.“Ah, ah! Mmm, ah! Ahh…! No, stop, mmm!”“Is it that hard? I’m moving slowly, so don’t close your eyes.”“Ah, stop, hick! There, stop, stop…!”—Woojin, Woojin, save me, ah! It hurts, it hurts, hick! I think I’m going to burst, ahh!“Ugh, mmm, yes! Ah, save me, save me, ahh!”I mimicked the actions of my on-screen self like a fool. On the screen, Jung Woojin was thrusting rapidly, as if he was about to climax. In reality, Jung Woojin was moving slowly, without any thrusting at all. Yet, I cried out as if being penetrated forcefully. Jung Woojin kissed my tear-streaked cheek, wiping it with his hand.“Why? Do you want to come?”“Ugh, ahh… it hurts, mmm…!”“Why does it hurt? I haven’t even touched it. Look, you’re still dripping like you’re peeing.”“Ugh! No, stop! Don’t touch me! No, ugh!”“You’re going to pass out.”Jung Woojin lowered his head further and licked my neck, where he had bitten earlier. As his tongue touched the bitten area, it throbbed with a sharp pain. It felt as if the flesh had been torn.“Do you not like doing it with the video on?”— Aah! Ah, no, slow, ahh, mmm! Faster, ah, it’s tearing, tearing, ugh…“Gasp, gasp, ah, ah, ahh! Gasp…!”“Sunbae.”As my on-screen self screamed as if about to pass out, I too became breathless. Panting with my chest heaving, Jung Woojin gently stroked my cheek, shoulder, and chest as if to calm me. He whispered in a low voice into my ear.“Do you not like doing it with the video on?”“No, I don’t like it… I don’t, mmm!”Jung Woojin pressed his fingertip against the protruding ridge. Reflexively, I tightened my anus, causing him to exhale a hot breath.“Then I guess we’ll have to keep the video on for punishment in the future.”“Ugh… no, I don’t want that! Don’t, no, aah!”As he roughly swept over my unremarkable chest and pinched my nipples between his fingers, everything before my eyes seemed to flash. When I shuddered as if electrocuted, he squeezed my chest even harder than before.“Every time you say you don’t want it, should we have sex with the video on? Or would you prefer a spanking?”“Ahh!”“Shall I make you come by just touching your nipples without touching anywhere else?”“Ugh, mmm… ah!”Every time Jung Woojin touched my chest, my anus spasmed. Even though Jung Woojin had been moving slowly, he started increasing his pace with every tremor of my anus. It wasn’t long before the sound of slapping from the junction was heard. The sound of splashing and the smacking of flesh against flesh made my head numb.“Do you know you’re moving right now?”“Gasp, ahh, ah, ah, ahhh!”“It was the third day.”“Ah, ahh, ah, ahh, ah, agh!”“You came while I was sucking your chest.”I couldn’t tell if it was ticklish, painful, or pleasurable. The sensations, which could not be defined clearly, spread from my nipples and grew more intense. I shook my hips and tightened my anus while tensing my toes.“Actually, we didn’t need to do it for a week. Whether it was because you had a natural talent or if it was really due to the drugs, after three or four days, you were still coming while sucking my cock.”Jung Woojin’s words cut through my foggy mind like a blade.“Now, without me, you won’t be able to come.”“Gasp, ugh, ahh…! Aah, ah, ugh!”“Don’t be too upset.”Jung Woojin, who had been watching me awkwardly moving my hips, smiled as he grabbed my thighs. He fixed me in place, bent over sharply, and pulled his rigid member out.“Ugh!”“Now I can’t come without you either.”“Aahhh!”His hot cock slammed into me with such force that it felt like it was splitting me in half.＊ ＊ ＊When I was young, I was quite good at drawing. Whenever I drew with crayons, colored pencils, or occasionally paints, all the kids would gather around me, and even the teachers, who usually had a stern demeanor, would pat my head and shower me with praise. I don’t remember exactly when, but there was a drawing contest in the orphanage. It was just a minor event. Some kids doodled indistinct shapes with pencils or turned their paper into collages with paint. Among all the entries, mine stood out particularly.I drew the landscape I saw outside the window with great effort, adding colors meticulously, and even included butterflies, flowers, the sun, and clouds that weren’t there originally. Both the kids and the teachers said I would win first place. First place was to receive a prize of Choco Pie and yogurt. I remembered that the day before, a kid had given me their share of Vienna sausage, so I planned to share the prize if I won. Although Choco Pie and yogurt were very small portions to eat alone, that was my intention.However, that day, it was not me but that kid who won first place.＊ ＊ ＊“Ugh…”I clutched my aching head and opened my eyes, but everything was out of focus. My vision wobbled, making me feel nauseous. As I lay face down on the bed, trying to suppress my gagging, a chilling rustling sound pierced my ears. Turning my head toward the noise, I saw my feet sticking out from the white blanket.I noticed a white, fluffy fabric wrapped around my ankles, like a blanket. And on that fabric were cold-colored handcuffs.“……”I strained my eyes and glared at the handcuffs. My head wasn’t working properly. Why were there handcuffs on my ankles? I reached out to touch them. They were very cold. I tried to loosen the cuffs with all my strength, but it was futile. At that moment, Jung Woojin came to mind. The only person who would put handcuffs on my ankles was that madman. Since there were only Jung Woojin and me on this deserted island, it made sense that he was the one who put the cuffs on me. My insides were boiling, but my head was strangely cold.I collapsed onto the bed and buried my face in the pillow. I remembered what had happened the night before. Jung Woojin had raped me while playing a video. He had been so crazed and forceful, but my body wasn’t too sore. Aside from a bit of discomfort in my anus and some pain in my lower back, I was otherwise fine. The most unbearable thing right now was hunger. I tentatively placed my hand on my stomach. It felt deeply hollow; I imagined it would be visible down to my ribs if I stood in front of a mirror.As I lay still, the only sound I could hear was my own breathing. There was no sign of anyone. Jung Woojin must not be home. If that’s the case, this is my chance to escape, but with the handcuffs on my ankles, that was impossible. If it weren’t for the cuffs, I would have climbed out the window and fled again. I knew this was a deserted island, but I would keep trying to escape whenever the opportunity arose. I felt like I would go insane if I didn’t.While lying on the bed with only my eyes blinking, I heard the door creak open. Without any footsteps, Jung Woojin approached me, like a ghost.“Are you awake?”Jung Woojin gently brushed my head and cheek before lowering his hand to tend to my ankles.“I’m sorry. It must have been very uncomfortable. Did it hurt?”The handcuffs clicked open as the clasp was released. Jung Woojin removed the fabric from around my ankles and kissed them. The touch of his lukewarm lips against my cold skin gave me chills. It felt like insects crawling on my ankles.“The boat arrived this morning.”Boat? As I abruptly lifted my head, Jung Woojin’s lips curved into a smile.“We ran out of food. Oh, and I brought a new plant for the windowsill.”Jung Woojin brought a small plant in a brown pot and placed it on the table. He set the pot on the windowsill and then sat by the bedside, placing his hand over mine.“Are you not hungry?”Just a moment ago, I was hungry, but now I wasn’t sure. Jung Woojin, who had brutally raped me and acted as if nothing had happened, was horrifically repulsive to me. But if I yelled or cursed at him, he would rape me again. And the next day, he would ask me if I was hungry as if nothing had happened, just like now.“……Are we going to stay silent again?”Jung Woojin, still with his hand over mine, asked quietly. He tightened his grip, holding my hand firmly. I didn’t want to answer, but I spoke up. I was actually a bit scared.“No.”“Are you still not awake?”Jung Woojin’s expression visibly brightened when I spoke. He covered me with a blanket and stood up.“Stay lying down. I’ll go get some food.”Jung Woojin bent down and kissed my forehead before leaving the room. The sound of the door closing echoed like a distant echo.Jung Woojin never let me go until I cried and begged him to stay, saying I loved him and that I couldn’t live without him. In the end, I was almost unconscious, muttering only words of love like a broken machine. Even when he touched my chest, which would shiver at a mere brush, or when he forcefully penetrated me with his hot, large member, I couldn’t feel anything. I didn’t feel good or bad. I was completely numb and even begged him to kill me. It wasn’t sexual activity; it was torture. For both me and Jung Woojin.I slowly rose from the bed and got down. I hadn’t noticed while lying still, but standing on the floor, my lower back began to hurt. My thighs, arms, chest, anus, genitals, and neck all ached. As I dragged my feet and left the room, I started to smell a savory aroma. Jung Woojin, who was cooking something in the kitchen, looked up in surprise when he saw me.“Why are you out of bed? Are you alright?”I stared blankly at Jung Woojin before turning my head and continuing to walk. It felt like I had been here for quite a while, but I hadn’t had the chance to see the house. I opened every door I came across as if I were crazy. I opened the bathroom door to check inside and then went outside to open another door and check. When I opened the door next to the room I was staying in, I saw a large desk, a laptop, and a bookshelf. Entering, I stepped on a plush rug. I dusted off the laptop with my hand and examined the books on the shelf.