Living with the Arrogant Queen from High School is Surprisingly Not Uncomfortable

Come to think of it, just the other day, I had to carry Kasahara on my back on our way home.

At that time, the emotions residing deep within me, given the relationship I had with the person I was carrying on my back, were a complex mix somewhat similar to nostalgia. There were feelings of frustration, loneliness, and a slight expectation. Anyway, those feelings were swirling and forming a collective whole.

However, the emotions I feel now while carrying Hayashi are somewhat more refined compared to that time.

Especially, the biggest percentage is worry.

Back when she clung to my arm, and even now, as she trembles on my back, I can’t help but worry about her.

… I’ve never really analyzed my feelings like this in an environment where I’m alone with the opposite sex, I thought vaguely.

But having analyzed them, I thought of something… That is, I can’t help but think that Hayashi’s current mental state is disconnected from the purpose of going out.

Usually, the main reasons for going out are to have fun or refresh.

Hayashi must have also planned today’s outing to have fun with Kasahara.

… But the emotions Hayashi seems to be harboring now, from an outsider’s perspective, seem to be nothing but fear and negative feelings.

“Ugh…”

After Hayashi’s moan, her head hit the back of mine.

Even now that I’m carrying her, she probably can’t keep her eyes open properly.

In retrospect, I should’ve stopped us from walking on the Rainbow Bridge.

… Could that really be the case?

Originally, the reason we decided to walk on the Rainbow Bridge was because Hayashi wanted to entertain me.

And right now, the most prominent emotion swirling within me is worry. But secondly, funnily enough, there’s a feeling of enjoyment.

According to her calculations, I’m actually enjoying walking here, in one way or another.

So, it wasn’t a mistake to walk here. There was absolutely no need to stop us from walking here.

… Yet, even after thinking that far, why do I still think I should have stopped us?

Oh, humans are strange creatures.

I find it troublesome that I can’t explain my own feelings.

… Well, ultimately, unless I can help the trembling girl behind me recover, I feel like I’ll regret coming here.

So, what should I say to help her recover?

I racked my brain a little.

Why is she so scared right now?

… Is she scared of heights?

Then, how can you get rid of the fear?

Get down from the high place, or leave quickly.

… Don’t take such a person to a high place in the first place.

No good…!

No matter how I think about it, it seems like it was a mistake to come to the Rainbow Bridge…!

… Ugh.

Let’s try to think in reverse.

That is… yeah. I should make her overcome it.

In other words, although she is afraid of heights right now, we should make her no longer afraid of high places.

… So, what should I do?

The first thing that came to mind was shock therapy.

I shook my body hard.

“Kyaaaaaaaa!”

Hayashi screamed.

“W-w-w-what are you doing!?”

I shook my body hard once more.

“Gyaaaaaaaa!”

“Hmm. No good, huh?”

It seemed to have only fueled her fear.

Hayashi, panting heavily, pinched both my cheeks hard.

“What the hell are you doing!!!”

“Well, I thought if I inflicted a stronger fear, you’d get used to the fear and it would lessen. Ouch! Ouch!”

If my cheek was mochi, Hayashi would have torn it off with the force she was pulling.

Hmm. This was a complete failure. More importantly, I can’t move recklessly because it would only instill more fear in Hayashi, and as a result, I can only let myself be done as she pleases, and my cheek hurts so much it’s unbearable.

… Originally, the idea of applying shock therapy to stir fear in her, who had been subjected to the intense trauma of domestic violence, was unthinkable when calmly considered.

I felt a strong guilt for trying something experimentally that should not have been attempted in the first place.

“I’m sorry. That was thoughtless of me.”

“I won’t forgive you even if you apologize!”

Hayashi was unusually genuinely angry.

“I’m sorry.”

“You always, always! You just do weird things! I’ve had enough! Enough!!!”

“Sorry…”

Had I always been doing such strange things? The situation being as it is, I didn’t object, but I certainly question that. I mean, I do tend to act thoughtlessly at times, constantly cleaning when not sleeping, or provoking Hayashi who’s heartbroken from domestic violence.

Hmm…

It certainly seems like I’m always doing strange things.

“You… you pay close attention to me, huh.”

Suddenly, Hayashi’s hands stopped.

“…Don’t feel flattered when I’m scolding you.”

“Sorry. I admit, I was too thoughtless.”

Hayashi seemed to have calmed down a little.

Could it be that my haphazard actions had some effect after all?

“But, since we get to see such a splendid view now, I want to share it with you.”

“With me?”

“Yes, with you.”

Hayashi remained silent.

“Instead of closing your eyes because you’re scared, why not try to open your eyes and take on the challenge? Even if you still can’t handle it, that’s fine. Because, think about it: if you overcome this fear later on, you will regret not taking on the challenge now. You’ll wonder why you didn’t challenge yourself then. You’ll realize you could have had more choices if you knew you could handle it then.”

Come to think of it, Hayashi said something similar on the train when we were returning from her hometown.

She must be trying to change, having gone through various experiences.

If that’s the case, I, as her roommate, should encourage her.

Even if one day she comes to dislike me.

“Your way of speaking… it’s as suspicious as a friend trying to lure me into multi-level marketing.”

“Ah, indeed. But what I’m saying isn’t some shallow line borrowed from someone else. These are things I’ve experienced and thought about.”

“…I can acknowledge that.”

You would acknowledge that. I’m grateful.

Hayashi fell silent for a while.

“Amazing.”

After a while, I heard a voice from behind me.

It was undoubtedly Hayashi who let out that sigh-filled voice.

What exactly was so amazing?

Without even having to ask… It’s probably the same thing I’m looking at right now.

“Isn’t it?”

“…Yeah.”

Hayashi let out a sigh again.

“You were right. It would be a waste…not to see this.”

“Isn’t it?”

“…Yeah. I’m glad I won’t regret it.”

Hayashi’s arms wrapped around my neck.

… I said it’s a waste not to see the view, but I didn’t say to entrust your body to me in fascination.

I felt a little strange and lowered my gaze.

“The sea looks pretty dirty though.”

“Don’t ruin it, you idiot.”

Hayashi hit the back of my head with her forehead.