Lament of the Slave

 

I found the bed unreasonably hard this morning. Not to mention that no matter what position I took in my quest to find the sweet spot, there was something poking me in the side, the back, or a dozen other places. It was almost as if someone had put rocks in my bed - a prank, no doubt. Not as funny as the bastards thought, though. 

A growl escaped my throat. A demonstration of my displeasure. 

Yet, despite the discomfort, my eyes remained closed, and I rolled onto my other side in another attempt to escape the rocks in my bed. It was too damn early to get up. I mean, didn’t I deserve to stay in bed as long as I wanted?

I damn well did.

If only the bed was more comfortable. In fact, it reminded me too much of nights spent on a cliff above an ancient army encampment or in that cave in the woods. I didn’t mind it so much in my beast form, but in my human form... even the cage floors were more enjoyable to sleep on.

The barracks budget must have been really tight if they couldn’t even afford proper beds. 

Barracks!

I ended up in the barracks, didn’t I?

As the gears in my mind turned, the night in Drunken Filly came back to me. The drinking with the guardsmen at the bar, Hazel Mooney, and her almost fan-like enthusiasm and curiosity. I got drunk, but not enough to forget shit. I remembered catching up with Squad Four - the way the three of them, Freyde, Harper, and Meneur, were more tightly knit than ever; the way Stella and I seemed more like strangers intruding on their group.

I danced with Idleaf, a lot, and shook my ass with some of the guys on the dance floor. Better not to think about that, otherwise I would feel embarrassed even now. But I didn’t do anything to be sorry for. I talked to Thal, had a few words with Thalia, and got into an argument with some guardsmen. They didn’t believe that a whiff of my tail could poison them. Sage proved them wrong.

After I made sure they had the antidote, of course. The crazy bastards then wanted to try again, and more joined them. All in all, we had fun. And as the evening drew to a close and midnight rolled past, to the cheers of the tavern, I found the courage to take my beast form further, to become my true self.

Honestly, those guys just wanted to see a naked chick.

At that moment, drunk as I was, I couldn’t have cared less. 

Lie. It bothered me a wee bit. However, the price of a little nudity lost out to my curiosity.

I wanted to see my true beast self.

Much to my disappointment and a little relief, not much had changed from my Tier IV form. I still resembled the two-tailed fox from Fallen’s Cry in form, only with longer hind legs, larger ears, antlers between them, wings on my back, and a massive tail. I didn’t grow extra legs or turn into a drake, as I had dreaded in the back of my mind. What I did grow was in size. Not as much as I expected, though.

If my previous beast form was based on my standard weight of 67 kg, now weighing more than twice as much, I expected to be twice the size.

Wrong! 

My mass doubled.

To make some comparisons, whereas before I was the size of an iron-fang wolf or a small horse, not a pony mind you, now I was the size of a mule. Not the most flattering comparison I could be proud of. Yet, my chest heaved with the thought of how far I could grow with [Behemoth] and more food.

The biggest change for me, however, was not my size, but small nuances that changed the overall feeling I evoked. No longer was I a strange hybrid of human and beast, a woman in the skin of a fox-like creature, nor a beast with human eyes. Now, when I shifted fully, what other people saw was a beast through and through.

Not really true, mind you. 

Just because I gave in to who I was didn’t mean I got rid of who I used to be. A complicated way of saying that no matter what form I took, I was still me.

That wasn’t to say that the transformation into a beast was without consequences. Regardless of the fun I was having in Drunken Filly, I found myself suddenly overflowing with the desire to run. You know, to stretch my legs, get some fresh air, feel the wind on my fur, the freedom in my feet. When I mentioned the desire to hit the streets, I was instantly surrounded by volunteers who would dare to ride me, no pun intended - although thinking about it...maybe....

Pushing the naughty thought away, I rolled over on the uncomfortable bed, once again trying to find at least a somewhat comfy position and the solace in at least dreaming of a decent male, if not his embrace.

Anyway, I remember leaving the people at the Drunken Filly, not humoring their banter, and making my way through Castiana. But even so, I wasn’t all alone. Idleaf was there, running beside me, of course. The spirit enjoyed racing through the city at night, no less than I did. Then, on the rooftops, Sah kept up with us. And for some reason, even Deckard was there, running through the streets, reeking of the woman he was with.

In the end, it didn’t matter if he got laid or not. What mattered was that we were running, and we did. We ran out of the city, racing under a clear sky full of bright stars with two moons floating in it, the larger one the color of sapphire with a hint of green, the smaller one violet. Our destination was unclear at first, just to enjoy the freedom, I guess, and we did. Or at least I did, howling at the moons like some kind of crazy wolf.

Then Idleaf mentioned flying and...

My eyes flew open, and I got out of bed as swiftly as I ever had.

“Good morning, Grey,” came the voice of Sah, sitting not far from me on a massive root that I knew could only belong to Idleaf. Yep, I was in the heart of Esulmor, sleeping under her canopy by her trunk, on her roots and the moss that grew on them, covered by nothing but my own fluffy tail.

We had run a hell of a long way.

“Morning,” I grumbled back, looking around for anything in particular - just to get myself rooted, so to speak.

“You’re not a morning person, are you?”

“I thought you’d know that by now,” I yawned back, stretching like a cat.

“People change. For example, I remember you as a rather shy young woman, and look at you now...”

Yeah, I was brazenly showing my tits to the world.

“Well, some things just stay the same no matter what,” I commented on my late morning and crankiness, trying to stay cool about my nudity.

The Imperial Agent laughed. “ Unfortunately, I have to agree with you, Grey. Well, I don’t know if you’ll appreciate this, but you’ll find an outfit-spatial ring on your left hand and some clothes in it. Courtesy of Deckard.”

“Oh, where is he, anyway?” I asked as I quickly slipped into shorts and a shirt.

“That way in the woods. Since it’s quiet, I guess the mossbears are healing him.”

“From what?”

“From his training with the adult mossbears. Frankly, I’m surprised you were able to sleep through the noise,” Sah said, grinning, a tease on his thin lips. “Although if I did not know better, judging only by your snoring, I would have thought there were two beasts of Esudein’s might living here.”

 

***

 

Grey gave him the middle finger. A rather eloquent gesture, and one that amused him even more. 

“How come he’s already training with them?” 

“You don’t remember?” He wouldn’t find it odd if she didn’t. The amount of hard liquor she drank would knock out a dozen strong men.

“Give me a minute,” Grey said and began to rub her eyes, her temples and the bridge of her nose. Sah found it quite funny to watch her trying to remember. For what she looked like, the gal had her charms. There was this wildness about her. Something he hadn’t noticed before, but now... well, he wasn’t the only one to catch a whiff of that change last night. Quite a few men found it appealing - to put it mildly.

Sah even had to quietly pacify one of the guardsmen so he wouldn’t ruin Grey’s evening. Little did he know then where the wildness and open-mindedness of Grey he found himself drawn to, much to his horror, would take him. For the first time since his transfer to Castiana, he found himself in the Esulmor Woods.

And as always, his carefully prepared plans for such an occasion did not survive the encounter with the first mossbear. The beasts were larger than the reports had made them out to be. Especially the Adult Mossbears, the Mother Mossbears, and Esudein himself. The encounter took his breath away and strengthened his belief that Sahal could not afford a conflict with Esulmor at any cost. Especially not now, with the World Tree growing here and the northern eagles and Miros living in the mountains above. Sure, they would win in the end, but the price would be too high - especially in these times, when the Empire was far from its full strength and the threats beyond its borders were all but extinguished.

No, what they had to do was strengthen their ties with the beasts, whether the lords and ladies of the Empire liked it or not.

Thankfully, the Emperor and Sah’s superiors felt the same way. 

After sending back a brief summary of what Grey and Palemoon had found at the heart of Fallen’s Cry, he was told that they would be sending two more members of the organization to join him. They also decided to reinforce the garrison at Granhill and increase patrols around the woods.

Much-welcomed changes.

If only the City Lord would keep his word and increase the budget of the Castiana City Guards. Despite the training the guardsmen received, there were still gaps in the city’s security. Not everything could be solved by the strength of individuals alone, so there was simply a lack of people at the gates and patrols in the streets.

Unfortunately, in his opinion, the Emperor was too lenient with the nobles in this regard, giving them too free a hand in the management of their territories. There was only so much Sah could enforce within his authority, and Baron Egerton was well aware of that.

In any case, it didn’t change the fact that Castiana and Grey had grown on him more than they should have. It was not professional. But he couldn’t help it, not when he was enjoying his work here so much.

“Oh, I already arranged his training with them,” Grey declared triumphantly when she finally remembered. “Then I went flying with Idleaf.”

“Not exactly how it went, but yes,” Sah confirmed. “The first time I saw you actually fly.”

“And?” she asked with a smile on her lips, curious about his assessment of her performance as a small kid waiting for praise for a drawing that vaguely resembled the sun. That was another side of her, an almost childlike lightheartedness at times that he found annoying. But that was his serious nature in the play, and by all accounts, the fault of the beasts in her. From what she told him last night about her world to assuage his curiosity, she wasn’t much different from him before she came to Eleaden.

“It was a sight to behold. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were a born flyer.” Sah told the truth. For one thing, he had no reason to lie. And secondly, if he had, the girl would have smelled it. Her nose had gotten damn good. In fact, her overall instincts were kind of frightening. The way she always found him, despite all his skills and efforts to blend into the shadows - the idea that in a few years Arda could have an entire army of the likes of her... daunting.

If anything, it proved to him that he was still lacking and had room for improvement. Now - knowing more about the reason for the system - more room to grow than ever before. In fact, he kind of envied this duo of mentor and apprentice, their freedom and opportunity to grow stronger here in these woods.

 

***

 

Hearing my flight impress Agent Sah filled my heart with pride and made me want to take off for a little morning flight. Yet when I flapped my wings, my feet remained planted firmly on the ground. My pair of feathery limbs may have grown with me, but they were still too small to support my weight. The most frustrating part of it was that since I was sure to get even heavier in the future, it seemed that without the proper skill or Idleaf’s help, I would never be able to fly on my own. 

Like I said, frustrating, but not the end of my hopes. With the way the system was supposed to work, there was still a glimmer of the possibility of me being able to fly.

“Grrrr...”

Not the mossbear breathing down my neck. Just my stomach screaming for attention. Before anything else, it was time for breakfast. 

Only - I had no food with me.

“Sah?”

“Yes, Grey?”

“You wouldn’t happen to have anything to eat, would you?”

“I do, but...”

“You wouldn’t let a girl starve, would you?”

“Not usually. I have my principles. The mossbears sees it differently. Don’t you remember - if you can’t take care of yourself...”

“...I would only bring shame to Esudein by accepting help from you,” I finished, remembering my conversation with Mother Mossbears. They were really disappointed with the lack of progress regarding the moss on my head. A gift from Esudein.

Admittedly, the only one to blame was me. In those eight months in Echo, all I did for the moss was to keep it alive after passing through misshapen space back to the present. I might have grown in strength, but if I wanted the mossbears to accept me as one of them, I needed to know how to handle my moss, too - and the time to learn dwindled quite a bit, already.

“Time to get my shit together, huh?”

“Interesting. You said the same thing after your conversation with the Mother Mossbears last night. Although you didn’t bother to elaborate before you took to the skies, I might add.”

Was there anything to explain? 

“In general, that’s what I meant. Don’t you have things you’ve been putting off or a goal to reach that you’ve somehow lost sight of?” For eight months, my goal had been to get from Echo back to the present, but now that I was here, that was no longer the case. Of course, my ultimate plan was to return to Earth. Except that was as distant a dream as ever.

So - getting stronger was it?

Not a very noble goal, but it was all I had at the moment. Not that it had been any different before. All my aspirations, whether it was the fear of being weak or the desire to be strong enough to find my way home, could be put down to this: to get stronger. 

“Actually, I found mine again - after eight months.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle at Sah’s answer. His job as an Imperial Agent was to keep an eye on me. Me getting lost in Fallen’s Cry made that practically impossible. However, now that I was back...

“Then at least one of us has theirs,” I said back, trailing off, absorbed in my own thoughts.

Getting stronger. Was that really it?

I suppose so.

At least for the time being.

Resigning myself to the fact that there wasn’t much I could do about it now, I found a cushy spot, settled down, and focused my mind on the mana and moss on my head. My hunger was growing stronger by the minute, and if I wanted to fight it off without upsetting our hosts, I needed to get the moss growing.

Good thing the Mother Mossbears taught me how to do that before I ran off to have fun with Idleaf. With their might, they made me sit with them like a restless puppy and, in the middle of the night, taught me the bare minimum I should have known by now.

It really wasn’t that hard - certainly not after Rairok’s lessons in mana manipulation. And so it didn’t take long for a lettuce-like moss to grow on my head.

“This is one of the weirdest things I’ve ever seen. And I’ve seen a lot in my career,” Agent Sah commented as I plucked greens from my head.

“To be honest, it’s high on my list of weird things I’ve done, too.”

“Oh, interesting. Tell me - what’s the weirdest?”

“Ass sniffing,” I said bluntly, enjoying Sah’s stunned reaction as I worked up the courage to start eating.

Much to my distaste, not much had changed and the lettuce moss didn’t taste any better than I remembered. However, whether I liked it or not, eating enough of it was what I had to do to stave off my hunger, prove my worth, and have enough energy for my own training.