Konoha: The Honored One

(A/N: Bonus chapter!!!!)

With your strength, is it meaningful to snatch Six Tails?" Terumi Mei glanced at the unconscious Six Tails Jinchūriki, her brow twitching in irritation. For weeks, she'd been tracking his whereabouts, only to be outpaced by the most insufferable man in the ninja world.

It was one thing for a Jinchūriki to go rogue; that was a Mist Village problem. But having him end up in his hands—now that was a catastrophe.

"Snatch? Don't make it sound so petty," Gojo said, lazily twirling a lollipop between his fingers. He flashed his trademark smirk, equal parts condescending and charming. "When I took care of the Akatsuki, he was just part of the loot. Think of it as...finder's keepers."

Terumi Mei's eye twitched. "Finder's keepers?" she repeated, incredulous. "He's not a misplaced sock! He's the Six Tails Jinchūriki! A critical part of maintaining the balance between the Five Great Nations!"

Gojo waved dismissively, like she was lecturing him on proper folding techniques for laundry. "Balance, shmalance. To you ordinary ninjas, tailed beasts are all doom and gloom, walking natural disasters. But to me?" He paused dramatically, slipping the lollipop into his mouth. "They're just oversized house pets."

The Mist Anbu behind Terumi Mei exchanged nervous glances, their fingers twitching toward their weapons. It wasn't every day someone referred to tailed beasts as pets. But then again, Gojo wasn't exactly normal by any stretch of the imagination.

Terumi Mei's pretty face darkened as her temper flared. Ordinary ninja? Her? Fifth Mizukage? A woman with not one, but two Kekkei Genkai? She clenched her fists, her nails digging into her palms as she forced herself to remain calm.

"Fine," she said, a strained smile spreading across her lips. "I'll humor you, oh mighty Gojo. If Six Tails is such a trivial matter, surely you wouldn't mind returning him to us? After all, Mist Village needs him."

"Return him?" Gojo tilted his head, feigning deep thought. "Hmm, tempting, but no. I'm thinking of giving him to Tsunade as a gift instead. You know, as a little something to brighten her day."

Brighten her day?! Terumi Mei's composure cracked, and she took a step forward, her chakra flaring ominously. This wasn't about the Mist Village anymore. This was about principle. How dare he treat Six Tails like some romantic bribe for that woman?

"You arrogant—" she started, but Gojo cut her off.

"Oh, relax," he said, grinning. "I'm kidding. Sort of. But really, if you think you can take him from me…" He raised his free hand in a mock gesture of surrender. "By all means, give it your best shot."

That was it. That smirk, that tone, that arrogance. Terumi Mei's patience snapped like a brittle twig.

"Fine. If you insist on being an insufferable clown, I'll just have to put you in your place!"

Her hands flashed through a rapid sequence of seals. "Water Style: Hidden Mist Jutsu!"

Thick, rolling mist enveloped the area, blanketing the battlefield in an impenetrable white fog. The Anbu scattered instinctively, their training kicking in as visibility dropped to near zero.

Gojo's voice rang out, amused and clear. "Mist? Really? What are you, thirty going on thirteen? Playing hide and seek at your age…not a good look, Mizukage."

Terumi Mei's jaw tightened. She could see him through the mist, thanks to her honed senses, but his Six Eyes made the technique entirely useless against him. Still, she wouldn't let his taunts distract her.

"Water Style: Water Dragon Jutsu!"

Three massive water dragons materialized from the mist, roaring as they surged toward Gojo. Not one to leave things halfway, she followed up with another jutsu. "Water Style: Water Colliding Wave!"

The water dragons merged with a towering wave, the sheer volume of water enough to submerge a small village. To cap it off, she slammed her palms to the ground. "Lightning Style: Ground Surge!"

Bolts of electricity crackled through the water, amplifying the attack's lethality. Together, the combination was enough to obliterate even the most fortified defenses.

The Anbu braced themselves for the impact, but when the water finally surged forward, it froze midair—motionless. For a moment, the battlefield was silent, save for the soft sound of Gojo unwrapping another lollipop.

He popped it into his mouth, gave a low whistle, and said, "Wow, that's a lot of water. You must be really lonely."

Terumi Mei flushed beet red. "You…perverted…clown!"

"Oh, come on," Gojo said, grinning as he flicked his wrist. The frozen water collapsed harmlessly to the ground, leaving the battlefield wet but otherwise untouched. "Don't tell me you're mad. It's all in good fun."

"I'm going to end you," she hissed, her hands trembling with rage.

"Now, now," Gojo said, raising his hands in mock surrender. "Let's not get too violent. Think of the Anbu. They're already trembling in their boots."

Indeed, the Anbu were standing well back, their nerves frayed from the sheer power on display. One of them muttered under his breath, "Is this…really how Kage-level fights go?"

"Haven't you played enough?" Gojo said, suddenly appearing behind Terumi Mei. She froze, a bead of sweat rolling down her temple as he leaned in, his voice low and teasing. "You know, men and women are supposed to…enjoy each other's company."

Her mind flashed back to that moment from years ago—the dreaded Thousand Years of Death. Panicked, she clamped her hands protectively over her rear.

"Y-you wouldn't dare!" she stammered.

"Wouldn't I?" Gojo replied, his fingers poised for the infamous technique.

Terumi Mei's scream echoed through the mist as she lunged forward, tripping over her own feet in her haste to escape. She ended up face-first in the muddy battlefield, her cheeks burning with humiliation.

Gojo chuckled, leaning casually against a tree. "You're too easy, Mizukage. Maybe next time, try some meditation? It might help with that temper."

"I will…end you," Terumi Mei growled, struggling to her feet. But her legs wobbled, and she sank back down, glaring at him with tears of rage in her eyes.

Although it didn't hurt that much, there was a strange feeling that spread throughout every part of her body.