NOVEL NEXT chapter 48
48. Dream or Illusion
───Why. How. You were right there, but only those words couldn’t come out. My memories deny it. Yet, my heart is rejoicing at her smile.
“What’s wrong? You look like you’re about to cry.”
Her hair, the same golden color as mine, was tied up in a side tail, a hairstyle I had given her as a gift.
Her blue eyes, identical to mine, reflected a tearful face. She smiled at me with kindness.
Oh, oh. Her figure overlapped with the one in my memories.
This is a dream. A comforting dream my weakened heart is showing me.
Lissette-san is dead. She died eight years ago, protecting her mercenary comrades. I should have seen her grow cold in my arms. I should have remembered her last words clearly.
This is a dream. The Lissette-san in front of me is a comforting dream created by my memories.
“You’re crying, Kyle? That’s rare.”
Her gentle voice echoed in my ears. I could sense her concern for me. Lissette-san approached me, sitting in a chair, and my heart couldn’t keep up. My body wouldn’t move. She hugged me tightly, and I couldn’t move.
“See, I’m here. Don’t worry.”
She hugged me strongly, and I could hear the sound of my heartbeat, dokun dokun. It was warm, and my heart felt at ease. I thought she was using more strength than necessary, and it hurt a little.
Does it hurt? Is this a dream? I looked at her, and she smiled gently. It was the same smile I had seen countless times in my memories.
There’s pain. This isn’t a dream. My head was clearing up.
Who was in front of me? Who was hugging me now? My family. My precious family. The precious person I had lost.
Lissette-san is dead. Then who was in front of me?
“Who are you?”
My voice was weak and trembling. My heart was weak, and I wanted to believe it, but I had doubts.
“I’m Lissette. Have you forgotten, Kyle?”
She tilted her head, and her side tail swayed. She overlapped with the Lissette-san in my memories. Her voice and gestures were all the same.
“But Lissette-san is supposed to be dead.”
“I’m not dead, see? I’m moving just fine.”
She hugged me again, and my head was buried in her chest. I could hear the sound of my heartbeat, dokun dokun. The soothing rhythm.
A sweet, golden osmanthus-like fragrance wafted through the air. It was the scent of the perfume Lissette-san loved to use.
I remembered confirming her favorite perfume and giving it to her as a birthday gift. She thanked me, and I was patted on the head until it was all mussed up.
“You’re still the same, Kyle, even after growing up.”
She patted my head again, just like back then. I’m not a child anymore. I’m 28 years old, a grown adult. I had stood on my own after Lissette-san’s death.
I gently pushed her away, and our eyes met. Lissette-san’s eyes were still gentle.
“Thank you, Lissette-san.”
“Huh? What for?”
My heart was weak, so she appeared in front of me, comforting me like she used to. My heart, which had been in disarray, was at peace. I looked away from Lissette-san and saw the desk. The Durandal that was supposed to be on the desk was gone.
I had always kept it by my side, never letting my guard down.
I looked at the person in front of me. My tearful face was reflected in her blue eyes. That’s why Lissette-san looked worried.
Thank you, Lissette-san. Thanks to you, I didn’t fall apart.
“What’s wrong, Kyle?”
Her gentle voice lingered in my ears. To me, who had lost my family, her voice was a comforting salvation, a voice that revived in my memories. Lissette-san’s voice was always gentle.
Thank you, Lissette-san. I had forgotten what to do when I was lost. I had forgotten how to deal with my wavering heart.
You taught me everything.
“I’m done.”
“Kyle?”
“I don’t want to use strong language towards Lizette-san.”
“What’s wrong?”
She looks puzzled, her well-shaped eyebrows forming an eight. She’s worried, and I can sense her concern is immense.
When I was young, I always worried Lizette-san. I was still weak and fought on the battlefield. Lizette-san always protected me.
Thank you, Lizette-san. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t be where I am today.
“So, I apologize.”
I want to apologize first. If I don’t, I might not have another chance.
I’m sorry, Lizette-san. I broke my promise to you. I abandoned your wish to live an ordinary life and continued to fight as a mercenary.
I’ve fought against demons and almost died many times. I even forgot the advice you gave me, to not push myself too hard because you didn’t want me to die.
“Kyle?”
Lizette-san, the things you taught me have been very helpful since I became independent.
If Lizette-san weren’t here, I wouldn’t be who I am today. Thank you, and farewell.
“Disappear from my sight right now!!”
───The scenery before my eyes changed with a sound like shattering glass.
The room in the inn where I was supposed to be was now a completely white, empty space. Lizette-san, who was just in front of me, was gone.
I heard the sound of applause, and when I turned to look, Lizette-san was standing there again, smiling happily. But it was different from the smile I remembered; her mouth was curved upwards in a way I had never seen before.
“Incredible, you’re not being consumed despite being weak-hearted.”
Her tone was full of surprise, and she even whistled. Lizette-san wouldn’t make such a gesture. Anger welled up inside me, but I took a deep breath and calmed down. On the battlefield, one must always remain calm – that’s what Lizette-san taught me.
“Stop that pose. I’ll kill you.”
“Can you kill me in this form?”
She spread her arms wide and smiled mockingly. That was not a gesture Lizette-san would make.
“You’re a disgusting guy. If you weren’t in that face, I would’ve punched you.”
“Then it was the right decision to take on this form!”
Ha! Ha! Ha! The thing that looked like Lizette-san laughed.
My head was calm now. My thoughts were clear. This was a dream, not reality.
“Don’t punch me, so stop that pose. It’s annoying.”
“Oh, I thought you had a favorable impression of this form when I read your memories?”
“Not if it’s not you.”
“Oh, what a shame.”
The thing that looked like Lizette-san distorted, its body twisting and contorting in a way that made me feel nauseous.
The sound of bones cracking echoed. Its arms and legs twisted and turned, taking on a grotesque form.
In front of me was a meatball-like creature. It was the thing that had taken on Lizette-san’s form and was now slowly transforming into a person.
Horns appeared, as well as red-black bat-like wings on its waist. The tip of its tail, which grew from its waist, was shaped like an inverted heart.
Its pink hair was styled in a twin tail, and its black goat-like horns stood out. Its blood-red eyes and lips were a deep crimson, as if they had been painted with blood.
Had I seen this before in my past life? A Gothic Lolita? A noble’s daughter wearing a modified black dress that was a bit too short.
Its tail swayed back and forth, and its gaze seemed to be enjoying itself.
“You’re aware of it, but this is your dream, right?”
“Probably.”
In reality, impossible things are happening. I had expected it, but this is a dream. Even with the abilities I received from Mirabel, I couldn’t defend against it.
No, I’ll think about that later. Even in a dream, there’s pain. I should take it seriously.
The woman in front of me seems delighted by my response.
“Will you tell me your name?”
“I don’t intend to introduce myself to an enemy, but it’s pointless anyway.”
“You don’t need to say it, I already know. I just want to hear it from your mouth.”
“Kail. Kail Grafem.”
When I introduce myself, the woman smiles in satisfaction.
“Ah, ah. Kail, that’s a great name!”
“Who are you?”
“That’s a natural question. You answered it, and I’ll answer it too.”
She spins around once, then winks at me, making me feel irritated.
“One of the Four Heavenly Kings, ‘Fantasy’ Diabolodeath (that’s what it is).
Welcome to the endless nightmare.”
───I want to go back right now.