It Seems Like My Childhood Friend Has Returned

#01

“Why aren’t you two dating?”

I’ve heard this countless times from the same childhood friend since we were 6, going to the same kindergarten, elementary school, middle school, and high school.

At first, I freaked out—what are you talking about? Why would I date someone like you? I’m way better, and all that… But at some point, I reached some kind of enlightenment and just smiled it off, saying,

“Yeah, no~ We’re like family~ We can take baths together~”

At first, my friends teased us as they saw our reactions in disbelief, but as we genuinely stayed friends for 13 years, those who teased or questioned us slowly vanished.

“Do we look like we’re dating from the outside?”

One day, while we were casually spending time at a cafe, I suddenly asked.

“We?”

Joonu paused sipping his bubble tea and stared at me wide-eyed, as if asking what kind of nonsense I was talking about.

Lee Joonu. My treasured childhood friend and the bad luck charm I’ve known since I was six.

Looks? Honestly, he’s one of the better-looking kids around. Tall, well-built, athletic—a catch.

Personality? Well… we’ve hardly ever gotten into big fights over the last 13 years, so that says it all.

There’s nothing particularly wrong with him, and he’s a great friend, but I’ve never seen him as a romantic interest.

But why do people think we’re dating?

“Hmm… Is it because when you look at me, hearts pop up in your eyes? Honestly, if that’s not it, then it doesn’t make sense. Admit it?”

I couldn’t help but chuckle seeing Joonu pretend to ponder seriously before throwing out that ridiculous remark.

Yeah, as if I ever saw this guy as a man.

“Are you crazy?”

We teased each other, saying that’s why rumors started, as we walked out of the cafe and made our way home.

As we stepped outside, I noticed the sun had completely disappeared.

But I had never felt scared walking down dark night streets, not even once since I was a kid.

Why? Because this guy had always been solidly by my side.

“What if, according to them, we really were dating?”

While humming a cheerful tune in the brisk weather, I tilted my head at the sound that came from beside me.

Dating? Us?

“Hmm… Seriously?”

“Yeah. Seriously.”

Was he being serious? I turned to look up at Joonu, and he was staring at me with an oddly earnest expression.

“I mean… wouldn’t it be hard? I don’t know. They say dating should, like… have a spark, right? We’ve known each other for 13 years, and we know everything about each other—can we even feel excited?”

His sudden serious question and the atmosphere caught me off guard, but I spoke from the heart.

Yeah, we know each other too well.

It feels like nothing would change even if we dated.

But—

“You think you know everything about me? Us?”

With a tiny sigh, Joonu seemed to deflate, and at that moment, I felt something was wrong.

I didn’t know what was off, but when I looked into his eyes, I sensed a feeling of emptiness, and I wished I could take back what I had just said.

“No, that’s not what I meant…”

“No, no. You’re right. We do know each other too well. We’ve been through a lot together.”

I wanted to correct this wrongness, but Joonu cut me off, as if saying it was fine.

Or as if there was no need to say more since we knew everything.

Joonu, you do this when you don’t want to talk anymore…

From that point on, there was no conversation between us until we arrived home.

I wanted to ask Joonu why he was acting this way, but his profile looked so upset that I couldn’t bring myself to say anything.

I should’ve forced myself to talk to him then.

The road home, which was always filled with laughter and discussions about our daily lives, felt especially long that day.

#02

After that day, meeting Joonu became difficult.

For the first time in 13 years, I learned that even if you lived next door, it didn’t guarantee you could see each other all the time.

“Did you two fight?”

As I was picking at my breakfast before school, Mom asked with concern.

“…Can you tell?”

I felt a twinge inside, yet at the same time, I felt indignant.

We didn’t fight.

In fact, it was that we hadn’t fought that made the current situation unsolvable. I didn’t understand why Joonu was acting this way.

“Yeah, a lot. You used to go to school together every day, and you often ate together too, but now Joonu hasn’t even shown his face or mentioned him at all. How could I not know?”

Mom, waiting for me to confirm, began her deductions like tap tap tap as if she just got the answer.

“Why did you fight? You two have often quarreled, but you’ve never stayed mad this long.”

Right. Why?

I seriously have no clue.

Did me saying I knew everything about Joonu upset him?

Did it make him feel belittled?

That wasn’t it at all…

As my thoughts tangled, chasing each other, all of a sudden,

“…Me too.”

“Huh?”

“I also… ugh, I don’t know… I just don’t know….”

This situation was so frustrating that I couldn’t help but tear up.

I just wanted to resolve things, to reconcile, to go back to how it was and enjoy our time together again, but the fact that I couldn’t figure out the cause or the way to do so made me so sad and tight in the chest that tears fell.

What if we would never return to our original relationship?

“Oh my, why is she crying? Don’t cry! Mom will go next door and ask. Don’t cry, okay? Our pretty girl is ruining her beautiful face!”

As I suddenly burst into tears, Mom seemed alarmed and came over to hug me, wiping my tears.

“Really…? You’ll ask?”

“Ah, yes…~ I’ll ask. Don’t cry now!”

At Mom’s promise to ask, I felt slightly encouraged and turned to double-check, but at that moment, I could sense a bit of confusion on her face. However, more than that, I felt relieved that she was willing to ask.

Thank you, Mom.

#03

That day, as I came home feeling lonely after school, I found the house empty, which was odd, so I called Mom.

Ring ring

“Daughter~ Are you home already? You came back early today!”

“Yeah… I wasn’t feeling well and came straight home. Where are you and Dad?”

I couldn’t confess that I couldn’t contain my curiosity about what Mom would ask, so I refrained from mentioning that I rejected plans with my friends to come home.

I didn’t want to seem like I was desperate to reconcile with Joonu.

…But I was, somewhat.

“What should we do? Mom and Dad are at a high school friend’s funeral right now, so I think it’ll be tough to come back today. I’m really sorry for the sudden news, but can you stay home alone? Or you could go next door to Joonu’s house! I’ll let him know.”

I felt flustered by the sudden news of being home alone and about Joonu, but there was nothing I could do.

“Okay… No need to tell Joonu’s family. I’ll just stay home, Mom.”

“Are you sure? You really can’t just go next door? What could have happened for you two to fight so much?”

“Oh Mom…! It’s not like that at all! Just have a good time with Dad. I’m going to hang up now!”

“Alright. Love you, daughter~”

At that moment, Mom, who hung up with a chuckle, irritated me a bit, but I thought it would be unwise to vent my feelings on her, so I decided to take a shower and rest.

Would I be able to meet Joonu tomorrow? I pondered as I lay down in bed.

#04

“━━━━━━!”

In the middle of my sleep, I awoke to what felt like a very loud noise.

I had opened my eyes, but everything was still dark as if a fog had descended, and I could smell something foul in the air mixed with the oppressive heat.

It didn’t feel like it was just dark since it was nighttime; it felt like something was blocking my line of sight.

Thinking something was wrong, I tried to call out to Mom,

“Mommm…! Cough cough…!”

The words I tried to choke out scattered along with my cough; it felt like something was stuck in my throat.

The notion that something was terribly wrong hit me hard as I reached for the doorknob to the living room.

“Ah, it’s too hot…!”

The doorknob was so hot I jumped back in shock. It felt like there was a fire…

Fire?

As the word “fire” suddenly popped into my head, everything I was experiencing felt surreal, like a splash of cold water that jolted my brain awake.

Is our house on fire?

“Han Seo-ah━━━━━━! Open the door RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Bang bang bang!

As I regained my senses from the loud banging and shouts, I realized why I had woken up and what I had heard.

There was no mistaking that voice. It was the one I had heard for 13 years, the one I had most wanted to hear recently.

“Joonu… Cough Joonu, hey…!”

Joonu, I’m right here.

I wanted to scream that I was so scared and to help me, but no sound came out.

Was it because I had inhaled smoke while sleeping? My voice wouldn’t work properly.

What do I do? In a panic, I grabbed the summer blanket and wrapped it around myself.

Crackle crackle-

The door was engulfed in flames, and the blaze began to spread into the room.

As the door disappeared, the sight of my home was beyond words; it truly looked as if it had been devoured. All I could see was red.

In that moment, I realized how naive I had been to think I could just jump out.

Jump out? In this inferno?

It’d be a miracle if I came out unscathed.

As the roaring flames rapidly extended into the room, I was paralyzed with fear, my mind going blank.

Wait… am I… really going to die like this?

Is this real?

In disbelief, the faces of Mom and Dad flashed through my mind like a slideshow.

Then I remembered Joonu’s last upset face.

That day. I shouldn’t have said that.

Afterward, I should have talked to you.

The last image that came to mind was of you looking so upset, and it broke my heart.

If only I had one more chance.

As my vision grew dim and my eyes began to close, I heard a loud crack! and I prayed fervently in my heart.

Let me open my eyes again.

#05

Surprisingly, my prayer was answered.

Only halfway.

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