Is That My Alter Ego

Chapter 67 – Emotion

The laughter that burst forth was quelled by Kali’s fierce demeanor and the passage of time. Once again, I found myself apologizing to her after my laughter finally subsided.

Leaving behind the still-uncomfortable Kali, I once again let out a silent gasp, gazing at the city as I walked toward the vast square that lay just before my home.

I stood in the city of Espilia, in the eastern part of the Empire. The reason I knew its name was the grand sign that dominated the center of the square, adorned with the bold letters proclaiming, “The Empire’s Most Prosperous City, Espilia.”

The landscape of the town, a blend of medieval and modern, stirred my heart as if I were peering into a village from a fantasy game.

– …Why is a beastfolk here…

– Ugh, you guys! Come over here!

– Hey, let’s clear out.

At that moment, I noticed well-dressed people in the distance whispering as they glanced at Kali and me, soon retreating from the scene.

Amid their hushed conversations, I caught snippets of hostile murmurs and even a hint of disgust in their gazes.

“…….”

No, those looks were not directed at me but at Kali, standing behind me. The townsfolk whispered and shot her disdainful glances, even regarding her with eyes filled with fear before hastily leaving.

Kali bore those stares in silence. No, the veins on her forehead were bulging, and her teeth were clenched tight, suggesting she was forcing herself to endure. She simply did not express it.

Why? Why would they cast such looks at Kali? I could not comprehend it.

‘…Isn’t she just the same as anyone else? Just a little different, that’s all.’

Kali, quietly grinding her teeth and staring at the ground. She was just an ordinarily beautiful girl, with nothing more than cat-like ears sprouting from her head.

That was the only difference. Yet the townsfolk regarded her with the same disdain they might show to the lower classes.

Thump-thump—

In this absurd and incomprehensible situation, I felt my heart constricting inexplicably.

“…What’s with that expression?”

“What expression…?”

Following Kali’s resigned tone, I touched my own face. The corners of my mouth, usually upturned in a smile, were now drawn straight, my expression clouded.

…Why had I made such a face?

Beastfolk girl. Watching the townspeople’s verbal abuse, their disregard, their discrimination against Kali, I felt a surge of emotions rising within me.

Anger, helplessness, a sense of duty, sorrow.

Why? Why did I feel these emotions? I still could not understand.

As I wandered through the expansive square and around the corners of Espilia, the gazes directed at Kali never wavered. Rather, as time passed, the whispers and stares only grew.

And when I looked at Kali, forced to endure the daggers thrown her way without a fight, I felt I was beginning to understand the reasons behind the actions I had seen in my journal.

Why, despite being the same humans, did we harbor such hatred and disdain for one another? Why must we hurl meaningless daggers?

I could not grasp the reason, and since no one else seemed willing to change this situation, I took it upon myself to act.

No one could understand the reasons behind this hatred, yet I sought to eliminate it.

In a current state where no one stepped forward, choosing instead to turn a blind eye, I resolved to correct this wrong, to strive for change where others would not.

Could it be that I had become one with my doppelgänger, or was it merely the emotions I felt within myself?

As I reached such thoughts, it seemed as if a sense of duty filled my heart to the brim.

“Kali.”

“…Why?”

“Let us return home.”

Perhaps it was familiarity, or perhaps resignation, but Kali bore the gazes and scorn of the people with a certain dignity. Yet, it seemed she did not wish to endure the weight of meaningless stares, for she quietly followed my words.

As we passed through the square once more and entered my home, the suspicions and questioning glances directed at me, as well as the negative looks aimed at Kali, showed no sign of abating.

*

“Haah…”

I returned to my room on the second floor, cradling my throbbing head as I sank into a chair. Though Kali said nothing, she quietly took a seat in the chair she had occupied earlier.

What is it that I must do? How can I resolve this trembling, tumultuous emotion within me?

Knowing nothing, I quietly lifted the journal resting on my desk and began to read.

-xx year xx month xx day.

Once again, I head to my small counseling room without fail. After opening the door and waiting a moment, a few people trickle in, one by one.

Some faces seem familiar, while others are entirely new. Yet, they all share a common trait: their complexions are far from healthy.

The residents of the upper echelons of Espilia always wear smiles. They live as if devoid of worries, their faces adorned with blissful grins.

And all the inhabitants of Espilia are aware of the masks each other wears. Yet, they do not feel the need to mention or unearth those masks.

Because it is meaningless. Even if one were to peel back the mask and uncover the truth of a person, nothing would change.

I could not bear to witness such a situation. From the moment I first arrived in the village of Espilia, to this very day.

Thus, I established a small counseling room. To alleviate, even just a little, the pain and sorrow hidden behind the masks.

Fortunately, it seemed I possessed a slight talent for such endeavors. By the end of each session, people shed genuine laughter and tears, rather than the masks they wore.

Their faces. When I saw and came to understand their expressions and emotions, it felt as if I had found a reason to live.

Today, too, I quietly make my way to my counseling room. For the troubles of Espilia are not confined to the lower tiers.

I discovered a passage that seemed to carry a bit more emotion than the others. It appeared I had been conducting free counseling for the people at my small office.

‘Was it because I possessed such abilities that I acted in this way? Or did these actions give rise to my abilities?’

Hypnosis, emotional collection, and healing magic. Depending on how one used them, they could become truly wicked and vile powers, yet it seemed that was not the case for me.

“Kali. Let us go out.”

“…Where to?”

“To my counseling room.”

It feels as though I must do something to resolve this emotion. And though I cannot say for certain, I felt I knew the way to the counseling room.

With a deep sigh, I offered a small smile to Kali, who followed me, and stepped back outside.

*

Moving my feet as if flowing with the pull of my body, I found myself arriving at a small building on the outskirts of Espilia village.

Compared to the surrounding glittering and polished structures, it was small and old, yet it had a quaint charm. This must be the counseling center.

“…Is this really the counseling center?”

“Hmm…”

But there was something strange. In a typical counseling center, wouldn’t there be a sign boldly declaring its purpose, perhaps even some promotional material?

Yet, this building bore no sign, no letters at all. To an unfamiliar eye, it looked so dilapidated that one might wonder if anyone even lived or worked here.

Kali seemed to share my confusion, but I didn’t have the answers, so I remained silent.

‘Ah, whatever. Let’s just go inside. The key… it was said to be under the flowerpot.’

As written in my journal, I lifted the small flowerpot placed right next to the door, revealing an old key, which I picked up.

Inserting the key into the firmly locked door and turning it, I heard a clunk as the door began to creak open.

Stepping inside, the dim outline of the room slowly came into view.

‘…Is there no lantern or something? Why can’t I see anything?’

It was still morning, so it wasn’t completely dark, but the lack of light made it gloomy, and with the curtains drawn, I began to search for a lantern, taking cautious steps into the shadowy room.

Thud—

“Ugh… ow.”

“…What are you doing?”

I bumped into a chair placed near my legs due to the poor visibility. Kali, looking at me with a mix of pity and amusement, began to scan the surroundings before moving toward a certain spot.

Click.

As Kali pressed a switch, the room burst into bright light. She shrugged her shoulders, shaking her head in disbelief, and pointed at the switch with both hands.

‘…Is this even possible here?’

The switch looked just like any electrical one, and the light flickering on was identical to that of electricity. Typically, one would use lanterns or makeshift torches to illuminate a space.

I had heard that only at the Empire’s finest academy could one harness magic or technology to create light like this. It was said that such phenomena required an immense amount of energy, which most countries and villages did not possess.

Could it be that there was a reason this city was known as the Empire’s most prosperous?

As the light illuminated the room, I took in the sight of a small but well-organized space. Several plush chairs were arranged neatly, and there was another room partitioned off to muffle sounds from the other side.

Instinctively, I pulled a small lever next to the switch. My body seemed to remember, and I acted without thinking.

As I pulled the lever down, a crackling sound followed, and a small glass orb outside the building lit up. It seemed to serve as a sign of operation.

“………..”

What should I do now? Should I wait for people to arrive? A silence fell once more between Kali and me.

Knock, knock, knock—

The silence was shattered by the sound of someone rapping on the closed door.