Is That My Alter Ego

Chapter 130 – Passion

When I came to, I found myself sprawled on the bed in Ariel’s room. A cold wind rushed in through the open window, but the warm sunlight and the heat of the room kept the chill at bay.

Ah… I should have moderated my drinking. After a few rounds, I had gulped it down without a second thought, and now my head throbbed with a hangover.

“Ah, you’re awake. Good morning, Venice.”

“Y-yes… good morning…”

“…Drink in moderation. I’ll cast a spell for you.”

As Ariel looked at me, cradling my head with only my upper body propped up, she cast a spell, and like a ghost, the headache vanished.

Stepping out of the room with Ariel, I found the others waiting for me, as if everything was already prepared. We decided to head straight to our next destination.

It felt as if all the pent-up tension had been released… and since we had shared enough stories last night, there was no longer any reason to linger in the North.

“Please… come back.”

“Ugh… cough…”

“Our Ariel…”

“Keep in touch more often, okay?”

“Do I… really have to?”

After heading straight to the dining hall, when I announced that I would be leaving among everyone gathered, the Frost family, Kale and Priya, and my acquaintances all welcomed us with blessings.

Some shed tears and wept openly… but it would be alright. This meeting would not be our last; we would surely meet again.

“…Take care, everyone. Even if not often… I will return.”

As we climbed into the automatic carriage gifted to us by the Northern Duke, Ariel flashed a bright smile.

On the pure white snowfield, her smile was far brighter and more radiant than the warm sunlight.

No trace of anxiety or worry, no negative emotions were visible; only the hope for the future shone in Ariel’s expression, and everyone waved goodbye to the departing carriage with smiles.

The automatic carriage began to race forward. Yet, there was no coachman.

Whatever magic Ariel had cast, it was said that as long as the destination was set and she continued to infuse it with her power, it would drive itself.

“I really… can’t believe it.”

Inside the swiftly moving carriage, Ariel spoke while gazing out at the changing scenery.

“…What do you mean?”

“I just… can’t believe I can be this happy. That my heart can be filled with such warmth, along with everything else.”

In response to Seris’s puzzled question, Ariel beamed a truly bright smile.

When I first met her, her empty, violet eyes showed no sign of life, but in this moment, they shone far brighter and more brilliantly than the light reflecting off the white snow.

…Yes. Looking back, there had been so many moments with Ariel.

From the very first time I met her, I had nearly died, and I had danced between life and death countless times… but those days held so much meaning for me.

Tightly.

“…….!”

As I gazed at Ariel, I grasped her hand firmly and looked up at her.

“…From now on, there will only be happy days. We will… always be together.”

“Be…nis…”

“So, just wear that expression in front of me. You are far more beautiful now than the lifeless, cold Ariel!”

“………”

Seeing her look so happy made me feel joy as well, and as I spoke with a smile, her eyes began to tremble rapidly.

It seemed like tears were welling up. But they were not tears of sorrow born from negative emotions; they were tears born from overwhelming joy and happiness.

“….Yes. From now on… let us live happily.”

Eriel clung to me tightly, her body swaying slightly as she spoke. I embraced her in return.

Inside the automaton carriage, where we exchanged our hearts and wished for happiness.

The monster that had once killed itself, consumed by hatred and drowning in emptiness, had vanished. Only a girl, filled with hope and joy, remained.

*

“Haah… I feel a bit… trembling.”

“I understand that feeling…”

“I’m not so sure.”

Ceris spoke softly, gazing at her slightly trembling hands. The reason was clear: we were crossing the North, heading toward the South.

The Southern Empire. The place where my first avatar had acted, and where I had first encountered Ceris.

It was the space where I had begun to learn about this world, leading the Sky Mercenary Corps through days filled with fervor and passion.

We were heading there. Before achieving our journey or any trivial purpose, we had decided to confront the past, just like Eriel.

“The South… it’s been such a long time.”

Let’s see… I had roughly arrived in this world around the beginning of last summer. Now, it was the middle of summer…

It seemed I hadn’t been to the South for about a year. It felt like an eternity, and since it was the very first place I had acted in this world… I felt a strange anticipation.

“Captain… I, Ceris, have waited for this moment every single day, praying for it to come.”

Ceris spoke to me, her fist clenched tightly, trembling. Her eyes, always vibrant and passionate, seemed to hold a void, tinged with sorrow.

…It made sense. It was the time when I had first acted, and Ceris was the first bond I had formed.

After I had left, it was Ceris who had suffered the longest, drowning in pain and sadness.

Memories of the days she had shared with me after my departure flooded back.

Living each day on the brink of death, processing countless requests like a machine without a moment’s rest.

Not just Ceris, but all the mercenaries had followed her silently, without uttering a single complaint.

They had tackled the four-star monster hunts that ordinary folk or mercenaries would never dare to attempt, even the five-star calamity beasts.

After I had left, the Sky Mercenary Corps had taken on requests with a frenzy, as if my departure had ignited a hatred and fury directed at all monsters.

“…….”

Thanks to that, the Sky Mercenary Corps had become the Empire’s finest, just as Ceris had longed for, yet a pain lingered in my heart.

Even at the pinnacle, they could not rejoice; it felt as if they were merely hollow, endlessly taking on requests.

And it seemed that their inability to smile, despite being in the highest position, was all because of me.

“…I want to see everyone soon. There’s so much I want to say…”

Thus, I had to confront them, without fail.

I do not wish to see the brilliant lights that will illuminate the world beyond this empire dimmed merely because of my presence.

*

The carriage, having galloped through the day, finally arrived in the south.

True to being the warmest region of the empire, the sweltering summer heat enveloped us all, suffocatingly thick.

“Ugh… why is it so hot…?!”

“…The weather is insane.”

“Ugh… this is like Daegu levels of heat…”

As soon as we entered the south, the maddening heat struck the carriage, turning it into a veritable sauna, and we all let out pained sounds.

“…Captain, do you remember this heat?”

“Yes… it’s been… such a long time. It feels even hotter than before…”

Only Seris and I could face this familiar yet maddening heat and laugh.

Truly… this heat felt as if it were melting and roasting my entire body. If I were still on Earth, I would have been cursing, standing in front of an air conditioner with my mouth agape and eyes closed…

But as I faced this heat, memories of days gone by flooded back, and laughter escaped me unbidden.

The insane heat. We who had trained relentlessly beneath it. Soaked in sweat from the stifling warmth, we would finish our quests and marvel while drinking fried chicken and beer with ice floating in it.

As those happy memories surfaced, a massive village loomed before our carriage, so grand it could easily be mistaken for a small city.

“Let us go together, Captain. To our… village of Leriah.”

“…Yes!”

After a year… I had returned to the village of Leriah.

*

“”………””

The weather was as stifling as ever. Sweat poured from everyone like rain.

Even with the expensive cooling artifact we had procured, the heat was unbearable, and anyone could have been forgiven for cursing and complaining.

Yet, in the small mercenary outpost—old and modest compared to their might and skill, but well-maintained—no sounds could be heard.

Everyone wore vacant expressions or sighed softly, lost in distant memories, quietly sipping their beers.

Today was a designated holiday for all. A day of respite amidst the perilous, life-threatening quests they undertook daily.

It was a day meant for relaxation, yet no one could muster a smile. Everyone sat quietly, occupying their spots in the small mercenary outpost without a word.

And it had already been several weeks since Seris, the vice-captain leading the current Sky Mercenary Corps, had suddenly vanished without a word.

I knew well that Seris would not be in danger. Her peril would mean the empire’s downfall.

Thus, even in her absence, they continued to take on quests, honoring and remembering the captain who had departed.

– Creak…

At that moment, the sound of a cart halting outside the mercenary stronghold echoed through the air.

It was a sound so faint that it would go unheard by ordinary folk, but they were no longer mere mortals; they were elite, superhuman.

…Perhaps someone has come to recruit us again. Despite my countless vows to never leave the mercenary band.

“…I will go.”

“Please, Birong…”

Birong, always bright and full of life. Yet now, there was no trace of cheer upon his face as he slowly stepped out of the stronghold, his spirit sagging.

Hans quietly passed a mug of beer, watching the back of his friend and comrade.

Those days of foolish laughter and trivial jokes had vanished. Now, they all handled requests with blank expressions, unable to smile.

…It is hard and painful. I miss the captain, I long for those days.

Yet no one dared to voice it. They all knew that the feelings they shared were the same.

And they understood that, more than anyone among us, it would be Seris, the vice-captain, who yearned for the captain and even harbored feelings for him.

Hope and expectation had long since faded. Without the captain, we were no longer the ‘Sky Mercenary Band.’

Creak…

Birong, holding a small vessel, opened the stronghold’s door. His eyes widened slightly.

“…Vice-Captain Seris.”

“Vice-Captain Seris, you say?”

“At last, you have returned…”

At Birong’s voice, everyone reacted. The return of our vice-captain, who had vanished without a word, could only be good news.

“………”

Clatter—

And at that moment, Birong dropped the vessel he held, staring outside the stronghold with a look of disbelief.

“What is it, Birong!”

“Damn it… has something happened to the vice-captain…?”

Could something have befallen the vice-captain? Has humanity finally begun to crumble?

Seeing Birong’s expression, all the mercenaries hurriedly rushed outside the stronghold. Birong had already stepped out, tears streaming down his face.

“Vice-Captain—! What has happened…”

“…………”

“…Hello. It’s been a while, everyone.”

All the mercenaries stood there, blankly staring ahead.

Seris, the Vice Captain. Since the departure of the Captain, she had never once shown a positive emotion, only sorrow, pain, despair, and grief. Yet now, she was smiling.

Hope had long since vanished, and her eyes, which once reflected only the depths of an abyss, now seemed to brim with happiness and joy, as if gazing upon a past self.

“…..Kuh, kuh…”

And then, Birion, watching the small boy who held Seris’s hand, sank to the ground, beginning to wail like a child.

Thud—thud.

“Ah… Aah…”

“Ha… Haha… Am I dreaming?”

“Ugh… Huh…”

One by one, they followed suit. Soon, everyone was sitting on the floor, tears streaming down their faces.

“……”

Lastly, Hans. He began to weep more than any of the others.

“Everyone… it’s been a long time.”

His hair, as dark as the night sky. His eyes, a red so vivid they resembled roses.

No longer the sturdy figure of the past, now reduced to a small boy. Yet, the sincerity in his gaze remained unchanged.

And… the warm, overflowing mana he always radiated. It could still be felt, albeit faintly, within the boy’s body.

How could one forget? The trace of the one who saved our lives… and gave us hope to continue living.

How long had we awaited this moment? How often had we recalled it? Every day, every moment, we had longed for this with unwavering fervor.

“Captain…!”

“Captain!!!!!”

With Hans’s cry as the catalyst, all the members began to wail like children, tears flowing freely.

The Empire’s strongest mercenaries, who had slaughtered monsters without emotion. A small light began to return to their once hollow eyes.