Infernal Investigations

I was already moving before Aunt Diwei had taken her first step.

As our feet hit the roof about the same time, a half dozen emotions, anger, confusion, exasperation, pretty much all related to why the hells she'd decided to do this. Fear? Pride? Either way, I was not letting the work I'd put in go to waste because of her idiocy as I ran towards her.

The saving grace to all this was that Aunt Diwei was unbalanced from what had just occurred, helped by her still being stuck in that ridiculous clown costume. It slowed her down some. That and her tunnel vision focus on Tagashin meant she was responding to me several instants too late to stop me.

My tail hit the side of her sword, forcing the point off-target. Tagashin had already vanished, but her bent wrist, so when my fist hit it, her hand dropped the sword. My other arm hooked around her shoulder, trying to restrain her.

Even a decade after she had begrudgingly taken to teaching me martial arts as a reason to wallop me, I had no doubts about my ability to beat her in hand-to-hand. I just needed to keep her distracted until Tagashin interfered.

Assuming the other aunts stayed out of this.

Diwei's came into view. I turned my head just in time, taking it on the cheek instead of on the nose. Pain as my head snapped, but I got my leg wrapped around hers.

"Have you finally taken leave of your senses?" I said to her, dodging another punch as my tail wrapped around her other leg's ankle. "I barely saved you three from being consigned to-"

She disappeared, vanishing then reappearing near her fallen blade. Shite, the lock on her magic was gone as well. I spun, reaching inside my coat for a pistol as she scooped up her own weapon, pointing it at me.

Tagashin landed on the edge of the blade, the tip of her feet perfectly balanced, and Aunt Diwei hurriedly tried to pull her sword back.

Tagashin lept off the sword, driving it point-first into my roof, and then Diwei's limb stiffened, arms forced to her side and legs together. She toppled face-first onto the roof a second later.

"Very ill-advised," Tagashin said, waving her finger in a furious Diwei's face.

"Foul fey slu-," Diwei snapped, her last word choked off as I wrapped my tail around her, fins extending and muffling the sound of her voice.

"Until you learn how to keep a civil tongue in your mouth, I'm not listening to your bile," I told her, wrapping my tail around her head, fins pressing against her mouth. "Now then, I-ouch!"

She had started biting at my tail fins.

"Have you become possessed by some kind of rabid animal?" I asked, only to wince as her incisor punched through my skin. Fuck, I certainly hoped she didn't have rabies.

"Do you want to be a clown again?" Tagashin asked cheerily. "It could easily be arranged."

I turned my glare from my rabid aunt to Tagashin, whose grin faltered a little. "It would be temporary, only for a week. Maybe a month."

"Are you going to do anything to help her?" I asked Aunt Fang and Jing, who had wisely kept their distance during their entire mess.

They both shook their heads mutely, and their eyes couldn't quite reach mine. They wouldn't even look at Tagashin. Probably still shaken up from how the fey had almost rewritten their entire lives. Understandable.

"You know, some clowns have to do all the busywork," Tagashin mused. "I spent a week in a circus, on my way here. If I made you the youngest of them all, who do you think will always be picked to shovel after the menagerie?"

"Stop antagonizing her, please," I said to Tagashin. "We've put them through enough."

In actuality, it had more to do with the fact that she wasn't the one having her tail chewed on. I was going to need to sanitize it. And have it tested for any potential infectious disease.

"They tried to cut me to pieces," Tagashin said. "Be grateful I gave you your weapons back, ladies! The way you were waving them around, I really shouldn't have. You'll cut yourselves, or even worse, someone else!"

She's actually gone and grabbed Diwei's, which got a muffled roar of protest from Diwei. The sword crackled as it swung and I winced as it came far too close to comfort. Blue symbols carved into the hilt sparked as the fey magic of Tagashin came in contact.

"Tagashin, please stop talking," I asked her. "Also please stop waving that sword around. Aunt Jing and Fang, a word if you-"

Pain as a tooth went through the skin. Again. I tightened the loop of my tail around her neck, and Diwei finally gave up.

Tagashin at least took the hint and moved far enough away on the rooftop that my other aunts felt safe enough to approach.

"I have negotiated with your hunted target about lifting your curses," I told them. "Something your sister almost immediately broke. As is the case, while I'm certain Grandfather could lift the curses if they came down again, perhaps you can convince her more easily than I can."

Grandfather could break curses easily enough, and I'm sure he had trained some of my cousins by now. And the entire clan mobilizing in response to this would be bad. Tagashin might feel confident in her ability to weather that storm, I did not.

Even ignoring morality completely, for pragmatism's sake this had to end tonight.

"If I could have a moment to talk with Tagashin?" I asked.

Stiff nods from the both of them, and I released my hold around Aunt Diwei's mouth. For once, she actually kept her mouth shut. A remarkable moment of restraint, giving what she'd done so far tonight.

I walked over to where Tagashin was balancing the sword, examining the hilt intently.

"I'm not much one for metal-working," she said. "But this is exquisite craftsmanship."

"Don't try and draw attention onto a new subject," I told her. "You can bring someone back to their youth?"

It hadn't escaped me when Tagashin claimed the curses would take years off of their lives. That was…powerful. And also frightening, on top of how terrifying knowing she could do things like that. Age magic wasn't anything but the most rare of practitioners could do given the amount of power it would need. Biosculpting could technically do it, but requires a large amount of cells grown from the subject's samples, usually carefully cultivated. It required expensive equipment and a well-maintained environment, years of preparation and work, and constant treatments afterward.

A small fortune as well, every few years.

"Only when I've afflicted them with a curse that bad," Tagashin whispered back. "If I'm erasing someone's identity and youth fits the mold, I'm afflicting them to such an extent the spirits called upon will let some boons be granted as well. I wanted them to have a full life to lead better than what they had up until now."

I didn't say anything out loud, but I'm sure that was not intended. Certainly not the difficulties of three teenagers who probably had no memories outside of something to keep the illusion up, two of them in dangerous professions and one just slightly less so. Not dangerous, definitely not in this city.

"If they hadn't broken oaths, it would have stopped at where it is now," she stage-whispered to me. "As is, since they have, and there's no real time limit on when I can decide to put those curses back at any point."

All three of the aunts were staring at us, none of them seeming too happy about that.

"I'll drop it the moment I'm convinced none of you are a threat to me in the future," Tagashin said cheerily. "So if any of you want to start groveling or sending gifts to convince me of that, my address is on-"

I elbowed her lightly before the three found out she currently lived in Voltar's house. I wanted questions from them to be at a minimum.

"We can discuss Tagashin dropping the curses at a later time," I said.

"No, we cannot," Aunt Fang said, some of her poise back and steel in her spine again. "Leaving with the Kistune having that leverage over us is unacceptable."

"I am sympathetic, but a little less after you deliberately broke oaths sworn to her," I said. "And the her breaking the curse was met with one of you trying to kill her. Again."

Aunt Diwei snorted, but still held her tongue.

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"A mistakes was made, yes," Aunt Jing said. "Still, what is to prevent the kitsune from just afflicting them on us as soon as we are out of your sight."

A fair point.

"The same thing that is why you shouldn't have attacked her to begin with. Now, the blame isn't entirely on you, given how mentioning one simple fact could have prevented all of this," I said, turning my attention to Tagashin.

"Really Malvia, blaming me for this?" Tagashin said lightly, but that smile wasn't entirely joking.

"Only to the degree that you could have stopped them by just telling them who you worked for," I said placatingly.

"Why would I?" Tagashin said with a wry grin. "It would take all the fun out of it if they knew. Besides, would my employer want me to tell? It's supposed to be a secret Malvia, shush. Besides, they never would have believed me."

"You wish to explain your relationship with this creature, Lily?" Aunt Jing asked, tone more calm than Diwei, who looked ready to breathe fire.

"I work with her," I said. "By now, at a few points, because of mutual agreements between our employers, and I'm not allowed to say-"

"We both work for Imperial Intelligence, ladies," Tagashin said, suddenly kicking with her foot. Aunt Diwei's sword shot forward, burying itself point-first in front of her fuming face. Also, in my blasted roof again.

"That means Her Majesty's Government," I said as calmly as I could. "Tell me, Tagashin, who said something about keeping that secret less than a minute ago?"

"I'm incorrigible," she said. "This is far from the worst thing I've done."

"Well, it's not me who will be having to explain revealing it to our superior," I said.

"Someone trusted you to be a member of Imperial Intelligence?" Aunt Jing asked, disbelievingly. "And the kitsune?"

"We are contractors," I said.

"More like indentured servants," Tagashin said. "The only way to get your niece into doing honest work is literally by force, it seems."

"I did maintain an only slightly sketchy alchemy business for several years," I replied.

"Oh, only slightly sketchy, that makes it so much better."

I bit back a reply. My aunts, to my annoyance, seemed to be unsurprised by the idea that I had to be coerced into honest work.

"In either case," I said. "We're currently involved in work of some importance, one of which does not include sparking a feud with the Xang's. The details of it I would have to check on if I could go into."

"Not hard to guess, you stink of the Hells," Aunt Diwei accused.

"Maybe that has something to do with the Devil that invaded my house," I replied back. "Or do you mean other things? Since they were done on behalf of Her Majesty's Government, you can take them up with her duly appointed representative, assuming he hadn't left the house yet."

Call me petty, but after being sent up here, I was looking forward to potentially unleashing Aunt Diwei on Samuel Voltar. Truly a conflict worthy of song, assuming anyone survived to witness it.

Okay, I exaggerated, but it would be entertaining. Again, in a very petty way. Should I be avoiding that?

"You poison serenity by wearing it falsely on your face," Aunt Diwei said bluntly. "Take it off, now."

"I wear it openly," I responded. "Just because you can not imagine it genuine in me does not make it false."

"Diwei, enough," Aunt Jing said. "Arrange your own death at a later date. Lily, firstly, thank you."

I nodded, struggling to keep surprise off my face at those words.

"Secondly, I wish to apologize to you, Tagashin, for breaking our oaths."

Tagashin didn't respond at all, just looking at her with a predatory grin, and I interrupted before that caused any issues.

"Before you leave, I want to offer the three of you a chance to fight an actual great evil," I started. "Assuming my superiors allowed it.

Aunt Diwei snorted. "If you wish to have us slay a great evil, come over here and bare your neck, devilspawn."

"Of course," I said, taking a step forward, and my aunt's sword rose, tip pointed at my chest.

Only the one, as the others were busy looking disapprovingly at my aunt.

"Diwei, put your blade away before the kitsune decides that she took things too easy on us," Aunt Fang snapped. "The girl just save you, all of us, despite what she came from, so put your temper away for an hour before it kills you."

"Too late," Tagashin informed her dramatically, but with a chill. I did not miss the sudden vine on my roof inching it's way towards my hoof. Probably to yank me away if Diwei did try to strike me. "I already think that. Only the potential wrath of my captors is sparing you a lifetime scouring the sewers for vermin. Oh, I guess I could maybe just do Diwei. The world could always use more clowns, I think. Makes the world a brighter place."

Truth be told I had always found clowns mildly creepy but I was hardly going to gainsay Tagashin.

"Killing me now would probably also bring Imperial Intelligence's attention to you," I said.

Mind you, if only for the sheer inconvenience of what they had done. Samuel Voltar would probably shrug and try to find someone to replace me. Retaliation would only be to make it clear killing Intelligence's assets should not be done in general.

Aunt Diwei scoffed. "So you chose to hide under the skirts of her Majesty, unwilling to stand on your own two feet."

"My own two hooves, honored ancestor," I told her, to her reddening face. Whether from being called old or being corrected, I wasn't sure. "As for who I serve, is it not just an extension of the way of the world? If I were to slay you, would the rest of your family not come looking for my head in recompense?"

Diwei snorted. "Are you poor enough that you consider the bond of family the same as the bond of being a servant."

Breathe. Let the thorn prick and just fall away. Vitriol meant nothing if it came from an idiot, not matter how accurate it was.

"Similar enough for the purposes of this conversation. Also, given what Tagashin did to draw the attention of people in this city to begin with, perhaps do not suggest I am anywhere near Her Majesty's skirt in public, people may get the wrong idea."

Tagashin broke into a delighted cackle, while everyone else on that rooftop was probably deciding to forget that comment had ever happened. I assumed they had done enough research into this to know about the incidents involving Tagashin. Had they pried deep enough to find out about the entire 'got paid by a noble to impersonate the empress during sex' part? Maybe. I was not going to ask.

"In terms of the great evil, I do need to check with my superiors on if I can inform you of it," I admitted. "It is something that shouldn't be spread among the public."

"It's your kindred killing priests and summoning devils," Diwei spat.

Well, I suppose it wasn't too hard to guess what I might be involved with.

"The newspapers have already had their fill of saying things about that," Aunt Fang said. "Many of them are not flattering towards you."

"Or to your kind, who most finger as the culprit," Aunt Jing finished.

"Oh yes, the newspapers," I said. "Even if I am involved in that, that is who you trust? Such fonts of wisdom and knowledge, truly. If you wish to believe they have the full story, I won't dissuade you. Although I do have to wonder if their stories are as consistent as they were with the last incident we were involved in?"

I think some of them were still arguing over who was truly responsible for the shapeshifters, and the only thing taking up more space on the page than that was their constant assertions that the their rival's chief editors were secretly shapechangers.

Not really that important outside of proving their lack of honesty. I'd said my piece, though, and the seeds had been planted.

By pricking Aunt Diwei's curiosity and dangling tidbits like juicy morsels of meat I could drag her careening into all of this. Oh, she would know I was doing it, but the morsels were such juicy little bits of information she would go following them anyway. Her want to emulate the heroics of those before would drive her to it.

Sad thing is, she had done plenty, terrors ended, beasts hunted, actual monsters slain, all before I'd been banished. Just not enough to escape a shadow.

Right now, though, she was more focused on me, given her angry expression.

"The bonds you rely on are weak," she spat. "When they end, what will protect you then?"

"Not them anymore," I admitted. "You should look upon that with great joy, Aunt Diwei. When it happens, you can claim my head with not a problem at all, and no complaints from anyone, I imagine."

Tagashin scowled at that, and neither of the other aunts seemed as eager as Aunt Diwei at that little bit of fatalism. I exaggerated as well. I wouldn't lie down for her, and her desire for blood on her blade would hopefully make her reckless enough for me to handle. Perhaps permanently.

"Needless to say," the kitsune said, positioning herself between the three of them and me. "Even if Malvia finds herself no longer in Intelligence's employ doesn't mean you should consider her head something that is yours. Unless you wish to spend the rest of your life compelled to shovel after the elephants?"

Well, also the fact that killing me would be murder. But of course, being an Infernal would counterbalance that. There's a reason cases involving pure-blooded Angleans a got more attention than all others. If you were Infernal, Kentish, digger, rat, dwarf, motronon….actually it would be easier to list all the races that were not at the bottom of that social pyramid.

Diwei held her tongue, the other two aunts having moved slightly away. Time to get things back on track before this dissolved into threats and attempted murder again.

"Aunt Jing," I said, turning to her and inclining my head. "I wish to ask a favor."

"Ask, Lily, and I shall see if I can fulfill it," she said reluctantly. Probably expecting some onerous demand that it would hurt the family to not fulfill for Intelligence now that Tagashin had neatly roped them all into this.

I would hardly dare. Coerced help was some of the worst help. No, when they helped me, I wanted it entirely of their own will.

"I told your husband that I would visit at some point, to fulfill a request he made of me," I said. "I no longer need the request fulfilled as a precondition, although I would appreciate it being done. If you could please pass along that he can send a convenient time, and if my own duties allow me to."

"If you let this thing inside the house, I will not speak to you for a decade," Aunt Diwei threatened, and from the look Aunt Jing gave her, that had only sweetened the pot in her eyes.

"As soon as I can, I'll communicate a time," she said, then with just the slightest hesitation added "and a place."

If Aunt Diwei expected me to be upset over that, I wouldn't give her the satisfaction. "As long as I can reasonably be able to make it too."

"It won't be far from the Quarter," she assured me.

"Distance is not the only problem," I replied, rapping a knuckle on the base of my horns.

"It will be a place where that won't be an issue," she said.

That I doubted. Oh, I'm sure she'd find a place she thought wouldn't have an issue with me. It might even be better than average for places outside the Quarter that a Xang would deign to visit. That would not be that large an improvement.

"I look forward to your message," I said. "Now, I'm sure it had been a very tiring day for us all, so is there anything else to be addressed?"

I'm certain there were questions they wanted to ask, but two of them wanted to spend as little time near Tagashin as possible. As for the third, she was glaring daggers at the both of us. The effect was ruined by the clothes, the makeup, and the mild squeaking noise her shoes made as she took a few steps closer to us. Without her sword her lethality was quite limited.

No surprise what she asked about.

"I would have made my blade back," she asked bluntly. "It is a family heirloom."

"I'll mail it back to you," Tagashin told her tauntingly, yanking it easily out of my roof once again. "Malvia knows the address, I'm sure."

Diwei turned her face towards me, and I had to stifle a laugh. Really?

"If one stabs a tree and finds their sword stuck in it," I said. "Is the tree to blame, or the fool who decided to strike it?"

Her face colored, and she seemed to consider saying something, but instead turned on her heels and walked away.

"So, she can learn," Tagashin stage-whispered.

"Oh hush," I muttered, as Diwei stiffened but after a moment continued her walk. "I don't think Intelligence's protection against the Xang's extends to you deliberately provoking them."

"Yeah," Tagashin agreed, as the aunts reached the edge of the roof and paused. "One thing. I do have their magic locked."

Oh. I sighed.

"How are we going to get them down?"