I Refuse This Life, Your Highness! (Completed)

“Well… that may be true…”

As I hesitated, fumbling for an excuse, the Grand Duke moved with the efficiency of someone polishing a sword. Without hesitation, he began unfastening my dress, undoing the buttons and ties that had been constricting me all day. With the bindings gone, I could finally breathe freely.

“Change into something more comfortable. I’ll face the other way,” he said, gesturing toward the opposite side of the bed with a flick of his fingers.

Hurrying over, I shot him nervous glances as I changed. In my rush, I nearly got tangled in my pants and almost put my top on backward. It was an embarrassing struggle.

“Finished?”

When I glanced up, the Grand Duke had indeed kept his back turned.

“Yes…”

At my response, he turned and crossed the room in slow, deliberate strides.

“I drank quite a bit, so I feel drowsy. If I don’t visit your room, I’ll send someone for you. In that case, you’ll come to my chamber instead. The bed is spacious, so it shouldn’t be uncomfortable.”

He rattled off the instructions quickly, his words far outpacing his uncharacteristically slow movements. Then, crossing the flickering candlelight, he slipped under the thick feathered duvet.

“Your Grace?”

The moment his head touched the pillow, he was asleep.

I couldn’t believe it. I stepped closer and waved a hand in front of his face. His long lashes and eyelids didn’t so much as twitch. I even clapped softly, but there was no reaction.

“…Unbelievable.”

Finally, I grabbed the water pitcher, making a playful motion as if to pour it on him. A single drop accidentally fell onto his cheek, and I felt my heart drop into my stomach.

The Grand Duke frowned slightly, muttering in a low, drowsy voice.

“Stop wasting time and get some sleep.”

“I-I’m sorry, Your Grace.”

I quickly apologized, but he seemed to drift back to sleep immediately.

I returned the pitcher to the table and cautiously slipped under the covers. The space between us was wide enough for three people to lie comfortably.

As soon as I lay down, the exhaustion of the day caught up with me. My eyelids grew heavy, and instead of fighting it, I let them close. Consciousness faded swiftly.

“Sweet dreams, Yuraine.”

Just before I fell completely asleep, I thought I heard his voice, like a faint echo.

Bright sunlight streaming through the windows woke me the next morning. I glanced to my side, but only the puffed-up pillow and neatly arranged duvet remained.

“Your Grace?”

I heard a soft voice outside—it was Liss.

Since the wedding and bridal chamber had been held at the palace, only the maids who had served me since childhood were allowed to enter the chamber in the early morning.

“I’m awake.”

After a good night’s sleep, my body felt refreshed. At my words, Liss and Phea entered, bustling about with their morning tasks.

Phea prepared the bathwater and tidied the bed while Liss helped me bathe. The hot water, infused with bath salts and fragrant oils, chased away the last traces of sleep. Liss washed my hair and scrubbed my body with a sponge, her movements practiced and gentle.

When the long bath was over, I stepped back into the bridal chamber. It had been completely transformed—curtains, candles, and all signs of last night’s festivities had been removed.

Even the wine we had drunk had vanished, leaving the room pristine.

“Your Grace, the Grand Duke inquired if you would prefer to rest at the Grand Duke’s castle,” Liss informed me.

I had expected this. Although we had spent the wedding night in the palace, it was common for noble and royal couples to delay consummation or retreat to their estates. In my past life, the Grand Duke had suggested the same thing, though he hadn’t even entered the bridal chamber then.

Back then, I’d naively believed that moving to the Grand Duke’s domain might change things for the better.

After changing into travel clothes, I stepped outside to greet my family. The carriage bound for the Grand Duke’s castle was already prepared.

My parents and two brothers stood near the carriage.

“Mother, Father… brothers…”

The journey from the capital to Isser, the Grand Duke’s domain, would take four days by carriage. Even from Airden, which was closer to the capital, the distance was significant. This was the first time I would be so far from my family.

As I bid them farewell, I thought I would be able to visit Isser or return to Airden with the Grand Duke’s permission from time to time.

But the next time I saw my family was when I was accused of being a murderer.

As the thought crossed my mind, a crushing sensation weighed on my chest. I reached out and hugged my mother tightly.

“…”

Surprisingly, instead of her usual response of pushing me away and chastising me for being childish, she quietly returned the embrace. It was such a rare occurrence that it made me unexpectedly happy.

I didn’t want to part from my family. I wanted to stay home, to forget about this marriage entirely.

But I had a promise—divorce in three months.

If the Grand Duke kept his word, as I trusted he would. Surely, a man of his stature wouldn’t lie, would he?

It felt ironic to think that, considering he was someone who had taken a mistress while married. Yet, in other respects, he wasn’t the type to deceive.

…Or was I being naive? Perhaps I was clinging to the belief because I desperately wanted it to be true.

I wanted to believe that the dreadful future I feared wouldn’t come to pass, and that three months from now, I would return to Airden.

After a long, tearful farewell, I was about to step into the carriage when I froze. At the front of the procession, the Grand Duke was already mounted on his horse.

“Liss, when did His Grace arrive?”

“About ten minutes ago.”

“You should have told me!”

Liss shook her head.

“He said not to disturb you and to give you all the time you needed.”

“…”

Had it been like this before? No, last time, rumors of the Grand Duke’s absence from the bridal chamber had already spread throughout the capital. I hadn’t had the chance for such a bittersweet parting with my family.

“I’ll be going now.”

My family, though outwardly composed, wore expressions of evident emotional turmoil. Rision looked especially distraught, his brow furrowed so deeply that he seemed on the verge of tears. The sight of him made my chest ache, and I quickly boarded the carriage, lest I start crying myself.

The trumpets blared, and the sound of hundreds of horses moving in unison filled the air. The carriage wheels began to turn, as though fate itself had resumed the spinning of its relentless wheel.

After several days of travel, the carriage finally entered the Grand Duke’s territory. We passed through the inner city walls, following a broad, meticulously maintained avenue toward the castle. Beyond that lay the sprawling gardens of the Grand Duke’s estate.

The castle staff stood assembled in neat rows, awaiting our arrival.

I disembarked, positioning myself behind the Grand Duke.

At the forefront of the assembled crowd stood someone I could never forget.

The castellan of the Grand Duke’s castle—Erma.

He greeted us with a deep bow, his expression a mask of loyalty as he welcomed the Grand Duke and me.

According to Isser’s laws, my attendants could not accompany me to the duchy. A Grand Duchess’s personal maids were only permitted to join her one year after the wedding. It was said to be a measure to guard against external influence, part of the imperial family’s endless vigilance.

Even to work in the castle, one’s family had to have lived in Isser for at least two generations. This was one reason Erma, the son of the Grand Duke’s former nursemaid, held such a privileged position. Their bond was so close that Erma had even accompanied the Grand Duke to the palace during his youth.

Yet, even after a year had passed, Liss and Phea were not allowed to join me in Isser. The Grand Duke likely found the idea of having maids handpicked by the Emperor’s court distasteful.

If anything, he probably hadn’t wanted me in the castle at all.

Just looking at Erma’s face made me feel ill, so I averted my gaze.

Everything about Isser was so different from Airden. I didn’t know how to handle servants or staff in this unfamiliar environment.

In Airden, I didn’t need to assert authority—everyone cared for me without being told. But Isser was different. When I treated the servants the same way I had in Airden, they began to disregard me.

If I thanked them for bringing tea or told them to take turns resting during their night shifts to avoid exhaustion, they took advantage of my kindness. They stole tea leaves, left my door unguarded, and began to demand more and more. They acted as though my consideration was their due.

I didn’t know how to deal with the growing disrespect I faced every day. I was young and foolish—so utterly naive.

And behind it all was Erma.

Erma…

Cold sweat formed on the back of my neck.

I remembered the pain of the whip he wielded under the guise of “education,” the mocking laughter of the servants who watched, and the poison I was forced to consume daily.

The Grand Duke was often away from the castle and paid no attention to me.

Erma took that opportunity to court me. When I rejected him, he used my refusal as an excuse to torment me.

He somehow discovered a poison that directly conflicted with my Lamia blood. I still don’t know how he figured it out, but it left me frail and unable to function. My days were spent bedridden, paralyzed by pain.

Though my current body wasn’t in the same ruined state, I occasionally experienced inexplicable seizures. It had happened during the wedding and once more during the journey to Isser. Were the scars of my memories so heavy that they physically affected me?

Three years of powerlessness had built up, one day at a time.

I hated Erma with every fiber of my being, but I couldn’t help the fear that surged when I faced him again.

“Welcome back safely, Your Grace. Welcome to Isser, Grand Duchess,” Erma said, bowing deeply. The line of staff behind him followed suit, speaking in unison as they greeted us.

In my past life, I had forced myself to smile at Erma during our first meeting. This time, I didn’t.

Erma’s gaze darkened slightly, as though displeased by my failure to play the meek and cheerful Lamia he expected. That was the kind of person he was.

“Is Vihen in the castle?” the Grand Duke asked.

“Yes, Your Grace. She is stationed at the southern tower.”

“Tell her to… hmm.”

The mention of Vihen’s name made me tense. In my past life, Erma’s abuse had been facilitated by Vihen, who had been assigned as my tutor.

She had justified her actions by citing my “lack of diligence” and enlisted Erma’s help. Claiming the authority of the Grand Duke in his absence, Erma had taken it upon himself to “educate” me.

Did the Grand Duke know? Had he given explicit permission to beat his wife?

Probably not. But even if he hadn’t, he bore the blame for his neglect, just as I bore the blame for my ignorance.

If they dared to reassign Vihen as my tutor, I planned to oppose it outright.

But the Grand Duke seemed to be pondering something as he stroked his chin. Finally, he spoke.

“Tell her to report to my office when her shift ends.”

“Understood, Your Grace.”

He was likely planning to discuss education matters with her. In my previous life, this conversation had occurred right here, on the spot. Yet, not everything was unfolding exactly as it had before—there were subtle differences.

After Erma opened the heavy doors to the castle, the Grand Duke immediately crossed the hall and ascended to the third floor, where his chambers were located. Only a handful of attendants followed him quietly.

Before disappearing from sight, he turned to me and said, “You must be tired, Grand Duchess. The introductions will be brief. I’ll come to see you once I’ve finished my work.”

“…Yes, Your Grace.”

I bowed lightly, listening to the sound of his footsteps fade away.

Erma stepped forward and spoke.

“Grand Duchess, please step inside.”

Though he held the door open for me, I hesitated, my attention fixed on the group of people standing behind him.

They were the same ones who, in my past life, had reported my every move to Erma.

“Are those your servants?” I asked.

“Yes, Your Grace.”

“I don’t like the look of them.”

“…Pardon?”

Erma seemed momentarily flustered, but I wasted no time pressing on.

“I’ve heard there are workers named Resili and Bohen in the castle.”

His expression hardened at the mention of those names.

“How do you know of them, Your Grace?”

“My attendants know them. They say their work is exemplary. I will have them serve me instead.”

“That would be difficult. You cannot simply change the staff assignments on a whim,” Erma said, his tone becoming sharper as he straightened his posture.

His manner was reminiscent of how my parents used to reprimand me—stern and condescending. In the past, his domineering attitude had caught me off guard, leaving me unable to respond. Once he had established dominance, I had only grown weaker under his control.

But this time was different.

“Erma.”

“Yes, Your Grace.”

“Are you questioning the authority of the Grand Duchess?”