I Only Want to Lie Flat But Am Forced to Cultivate Immortality

Kids playing house always pretend to be a family, maybe add a next-door neighbor, but Ning County's County Magistrate, so old, is still playing the role of the foolish king Daji.

The key thing is that this Daji is a man!

Xu Qing didn't know what's going on with that County Magistrate; it seems the problem here is more complicated than he thought.

Keep in mind that the County Magistrate who delivered the map to Baiyun Daoist was already from decades ago, and Xu Qing came to Ning County only to confirm whether that County Magistrate is still alive.

If he's dead, find out where he's buried, dig a shovel into the ground, perform a Yin court interrogation, and uncover the truth of all matters from back then; that would be the end of it.

But the sudden appearance of the Fox Demon from Miaoying Pavilion delivered a message to Xu Qing, that the current County Magistrate seems to be the same one handing out maps of Baiyun Cave years ago.

And why he could live so long relies on the 'longevity elixir' sought from all around.

A sixty-year-old Crown Prince is not unusual, but a centenarian County Magistrate is not just unusual, it's a matter of considering hiring experts to exorcise demons!

But this hundred-year-old County Magistrate, the Imperial Court ignores him, which could be overlooked, yet not a single citizen in Ning County finds it strange, which is very illogical.

"Xu Immortal Family."

"Hmm?"

"We actually don't have to kill the Emperor."

Seeing Xu Qing remain silent, Xuan Yu paused and added, "Killing the Emperor is really dangerous. If caught, you would certainly be beheaded!"

Xu Qing suddenly halted, and the little girl behind him unexpectedly bumped her head against his lower back.

Xuan Yu felt she had hit an iron plate.

"Do I look like someone afraid of beheading?"

Having practiced the technique of surviving beheadings, Xu Qing spoke confidently. He turned to Xuan Yu, saying, "When the dog Emperor seeks the elixir, he didn't say he wouldn't behead you."

"Xuan Yu, you must remember, we don't easily provoke others, but if someone antagonizes us, then find a way to grind him to dust! If he's strong, then we put it on the tab; no matter how many years have passed, once there's an opportunity, we must settle the score!"

In chaotic times, one shouldn't be too naive, let alone be a monster.

Xu Qing doesn't consider himself human; he clearly knows he's a demon. He can choose to do good deeds, but he absolutely won't choose to be a good person!

What's a good person? Someone others find easy to bully and take advantage of, then you're a good person!

The last monster raised by humans and chose to be a 'good person' now has only eight lives left.

Xu Qing didn't say who it was, but it should know itself.

While speaking, the County Magistrate's mansion is already in front.

"This is the County Magistrate's mansion, do you have any business?"

Xu Qing, still using his familiar spiel, smiled and said to the gatekeeper, "Please report that Xu the Benevolent from Yunmeng Mountain has come to visit Master Yang."

"Master Yang? My County Magistrate's surname is Xiao, where's Master Yang?"

Xu Qing raised his eyebrows slightly, surprised, "Surname Xiao? Isn't your County Magistrate Yang Mingchun?"

"Yang Mingchun, that name sounds familiar." The gatekeeper pondered and suddenly recalled, "Your words are interesting, that Yang Mingchun was the County Magistrate during the year of Qianyuan, and it's been years since, with who knows how many County Magistrates have changed in between, how do you expect to find him?"

Xu Qing, unfazed, said, "Then please report to Master Xiao that an old friend from Yunmeng Mountain has come to visit."

Shortly, a servant from the County Magistrate's mansion hurried with a reply; the gatekeeper heard that the master was summoning, and was still puzzled, someone so off-topic, turns out to be an old friend of the County Magistrate?

Upon entering the County Magistrate's mansion, Xuan Yu was tense along the way, killing the Emperor is a big deal, with the national dragon defending against evil within and outside the Imperial Palace. These monster spirits wouldn't dare come near the palace, let alone assassinate the Emperor, but if the Emperor went to the Qianzhou territory, perhaps there might be a chance!

Yet when Xuan Yu saw the County Magistrate in the seventh-rank official robe, her mind was full of questions.

The little girl looked around, thinking: where's the Emperor? Where could such a big Emperor be hiding?

Xu Qing ignored Xuan Yu's subtle actions and his gaze directly fell upon the County Magistrate Xiao in front.

Opening the Qi Observation Skill, he saw County Magistrate Xiao's shoulders and head empty, without a single flame of life burning.

One must know that living people have three fires, the celestial fire on top of the head governs longevity, also known as the living person's fire.

Besides the head, there's also a fire on each shoulder; the left shoulder bears the flattering fire governing cessation, also known as the turning back fire, commonly noted that turning back suddenly might extinguish this fire.

The right shoulder bears the agitated fire, also called the nameless fire, governing yin-yang harmony.

The three fires represent a person's yang energy—vigorous fire wards off evil.

If the three fires are weak, avoid sudden turn-backs or being tapped on the shoulder or touched on the head.

Yet in front of him, County Magistrate Xiao's head and shoulders have not a single flame of Yang Fire.

Xu Qing's eyes narrowed slightly; there's only one possibility for this: County Magistrate Xiao is dead, and what he sees is merely a shell occupied by evil spirits, not truly a living person.

"Should I call you County Magistrate Xiao or County Magistrate Yang?"

County Magistrate Xiao furrowed his brows and responded with a question, "Since you come from Yunmeng Mountain, you must be sent by Master Ruyi. Did he send you with anything important?"

Xu Qing shook his head, "Are you talking about Baiyun Daoist? He can't command me now."

"Then you must be sent by Abbot Dingguang?"

County Magistrate Xiao smiled slightly, displaying an image of a wise master.

Xu Qing grinned, speaking in a peculiar tone, "I came here not under anyone's orders but merely to see what kind of person Ning County's Emperor and guoshi truly are."