I Just Wanted a Quiet Life... So Why Am I an Uma Musume Trainer?!

Fuji Kiseki's POV

July's heat shimmered on the horizon, heralding the start of our summer training camp. My heart raced—not just from the anticipation of the grueling workouts ahead, but for the debut race looming at August's end. I'd told Trainer Hachiman to be merciless, to call out every flaw. Stretch my strengths, crush my weaknesses—that's the plan. I'm the bus captain again, but this time, Hachiman's riding along, his presence a quiet anchor amidst the chatter.

Hachiman's voice cut through the hum of the bus. "So, what's this talk about?"

Oguri leaned forward, eyes gleaming with purpose. "Trainer, this is critical. I need you to listen closely and answer seriously."

Special Week bounced in her seat. "Please, Trainer! This means everything to us!"

Brian's glare was sharp. "Answer properly."

McQueen's refined tone carried weight. "Your response could sway our morale, so do take it seriously!"

Hachiman sighed, slumping back. "...I can already guess from this lineup. Still, what's the question?"

Oguri's voice dropped, intense. "Trainer... will there be reward meals at this camp?"

A ripple of laughter escaped me. Of course. Hachiman's cooking was legendary among the girls. I'd tasted it once—pure bliss on a plate. No wonder they were obsessed. Last year, I wasn't his charge, so I missed out. But this year...?

Hachiman smirked. "Knew it. Well, the answer's set. Cooking plans are..."

The bus fell silent, all eyes locked on him, breaths held.

"...there."

A collective gasp erupted. "!!"

"For my charges, that is," he added, cool as ever.

Special Week's jaw dropped. "What!? Just Air Groove again!? Oh, and Fuji-senpai! So only them!?"

"Yup," Hachiman said, unfazed.

Brian leaned in, voice low. "Explain. Convincingly."

"Eh? That wasn't enough? It's a solid reason," Hachiman protested.

"Nope," Brian shot back.

"You're kidding..." Hachiman muttered.

McQueen tilted her head, eyes sparkling with curiosity. "By the way, what dessert are you planning? Same as last year?"

Hachiman raised an eyebrow. "Why do I have to spill? The ones eating it are right here."

I chuckled. "Haha, I could say, but it'd spoil the surprise, right?"

"Exactly," Hachiman said. "If I cook, Air Groove, Fuji, and I will handle it. Don't worry."

McQueen's composure cracked. "I'm not reassured! Please, make dessert for me too!"

"Why add more work?" Hachiman countered. "And don't think I don't know—you lot tailed me and Ardan that day. Cake was good, right?"

McQueen beamed. "Oh, it was divine!"

"Then you're fine," he said flatly.

"How does that work!?" she cried.

Oguri raised a hand. "Trainer, make me your charge for this camp. Then I'd get—'Denied.'" She pouted. "Why? It's a good idea."

Hachiman jerked his thumb backward. "Look behind you."

I stole a glance. The pony girls in the back stared like predators eyeing prey. It wasn't just the food—they craved Hachiman's training. Even the newbies were locked onto him, their ambition palpable.

"If I took that deal," Hachiman continued, "every Uma Musume back there would swarm me with offers. They're already eyeing me like hawks. I'm only cooking for my charges. Want plain rice and pickles instead?"

Special Week wailed, "That's too cruel!"

Oguri groaned, "Trainer, that's harsh..."

Brian growled, "What are you even saying..."

McQueen's eyes lit up. "I'll beg those two to share!"

Hachiman sighed. "You're relentless..."

The others gasped in unison. "That's an idea!"

Hachiman shot me a look. "Fuji, heads-up—they're planning to mooch off you."

I grinned mischievously. "Oh, that's trouble. Maybe I'll have mine packed as a bento to keep it safe~."

"Ehh!?" they chorused, a mix of shock and betrayal.

Hachiman chuckled. "You were worried too, huh?"

I shrugged. "I've only had your cooking once, but it was unforgettable. I'm not letting that flavor go—not even to these adorable pony girls."

Hachiman's grin turned sly. "Save that fire for the races. Think of this camp's first half as a comeback. You've trained a year—time to show off your new power." His eyes glinted with mischief.

I smiled back, excitement bubbling. "Hehe, my debut's gonna shine."

That wicked look on Hachiman's face, though—first time I've seen it.

I leaned in, teasing. "So, Trainer Hachiman, can I expect a killer reward menu? Air Groove's got the Sapporo Memorial in August, so we're counting on something even better than last year, right?"

He laughed. "Count on it. But you're savage, Fuji—rubbing it in when they know they're missing out. Fuji Kiseki, you're quite the villainess, aren't you?"

I smirked, bowing slightly. "Oh, nowhere near your level, Trainer Hachiman-sama."

A perfect comeback, if I do say so myself.

—Hachiman as the scheming magistrate, Fuji as the cunning Echigoya...

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