I Fell In Love With A Girl Who Died Before I Was Even Born

Shion and I walked through the swinging front doors of Shin'yume and back in time. The entire lobby looked like it had never seen a day beyond 1987, and that was being generous.

Overstuffed brown leather couches stared like sulking grandparents as an ugly, unfinished wooden coffee table sat between. A green ashtray on the coffee table served as the perfect accent piece that no one wanted.

The hallway was silent.

Like the inn was holding its breath.

Somehow, the faint scent of tobacco smoke hung in the lobby, and depressing rows of humming fluorescent lighting lit a hallway with reddish purple carpet that would make the Overlook blush.

Shion stood just outside the sliding door to my room, her arms crossed, her weight shifted slightly on one hip.

She looked casual. Too casual. She was doing the "standing perfectly still" thing again, but I saw it. The way her pupils dilated just a little too wide every time she looked at me.

She was nervous.

I stood in front of the door to my room on the second floor of the onsen wondering if she was going to come in.

"So… you're just gonna stand out here the whole time? You can-"

"NO!"

The word came fast – sharp, like a gunshot cutting me off.

I blinked. "I mean, I was just saying—"

She looked at me. And suddenly, the air between us felt too still.

She took a slow, deliberate step forward. Not too close.

"Don't invite me in."

I frowned. "Shion—"

"Don't. Invite. Me. In."

I winced and wanted to ask why.

But I was very aware of how thin the space between us was, and I could see it in her eyes how hard she was fighting.

"Let's see how much you know about vampires, Ryu. What happens if you invite one into your residence?" she asked.

"Can you refresh my memory?"

I saw her take another measured breath. She nodded, and I could tell she hated having to explain.

It was embarrassing for her.

"I'll kill you," she said simply.

My face fell.

"Oh, not like I'm some kind of maniac or animal. Do you understand? I'm NOT an animal, Blondie, do you understand?"

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"Yes, Shion. I understand. You're not an animal," I started, but she interrupted me.

"Then listen, because there are RULES with me Okay? They CANNOT be bent. And they certainly can't be broken. Because when you break one of my rules… things cannot be the way they were before… ever."

She looked at me with her waterless eyes. If she were alive, they would have been lined with tears. But Shion was dead, and she couldn't cry.

Not anymore.

"Don't ask me how I know," she said.

My throat felt dry. "...You don't trust yourself."

Her jaw tensed. A single muscle in her cheek twitched.

Then, she laughed – soft, breathless. Hollow.

"I trust myself just fine. As long as I'm full. But… if you invited me in, that's the same thing as saying 'Shion, you can feed on me as often as you please,' and I'd NEVER forget that. Later, maybe that same day, when I get hungry… I'd come back. And you couldn't stop me."

Her dry pupils burned themselves into my eyes.

"I'd open your door, walk up to you and suck every last drop of blood from your body before I even realized what I'd done. And there'd be NOTHING you could do to stop me. That's how it would be."

I nodded slowly, letting everything she said sink in.

I can't treat her like she's a coworker. Or just a high school classmate. She never breathes. She has dead, waterless eyes.

She has rules.

I wouldn't matter how much I wanted her to be a normal friend: she never could.

Not now.

She stepped back. The tension snapped like a wire pulled too tight. She looked at me again, softer this time.

But no less dangerous.

"Yeah. You should wait out here," I said.

She leaned against the wall, arms folded, gaze tilting up toward the ceiling like this was just another afternoon.

It wasn't. I swallowed hard and slid the door shut. Only when I was inside, away from her, did I realize my hands were shaking.

I walked into my room and felt an unsettling mix of familiarity and alienation.

These were my things—but remade, altered.

Or rather, they were things that Ryu had brought to his room at Shin'yume-sou. Our tastes were similar enough to be eerie.

A desk sat beside the patio door, which opened onto a small porch overlooking the onsen. Two closet doors stood shut to the left. His futon lay in the middle of the room, still unmade from this morning. A couch and side table lined the right wall.

I opened the drawer in the center of the desk. Yes! Letters, a folder…

Oh my god. I had paperwork here. A schedule for Crescent Moon Academy, grades from Ryu's former schools. Adoptive parents.

Ryu's life was like a twisted mirror of my own.

He was born in Elkins, West Virginia—just like me. But in a different year. Then, our lives split.

When he was four, his Japanese parents adopted him, and they moved to Osaka. When he was ten, they moved to Kyoto. And Ryu… had problems.

He had a reputation as a rebel.

Crescent Moon Academy was the only school that accepted him.

I found an acceptance letter and what looked like a student handbook, but I ignored it.

No one ever reads student handbooks.

My goal was to find Lana as soon as possible and make her get me out of here.

I exhaled slowly, slipped the identification papers into Ryu's book bag and slung it over my back.

"Oh, thank goodness," I muttered.

In the corner, against the wall, I saw a guitar. It looked exactly like mine—but black, with dragon stickers.

"You really lean into the whole 'Dragon' aesthetic, don't you?" I muttered, smirking.

"Who are you talking to?" I heard a voice whisper.

I jumped.

"Who's there?" I tried to keep my voice steady.

A whisper.

Like someone speaking from another room, their voice slipping through an old vent.

"Gracious! You can hear me?"

A girl's voice.

My heart pounded. "Can you speak up? I can barely hear you," I said loudly.

BANG!

Someone downstairs smacked the ceiling.

"Nya! Keep it down up there! Yelling hurts Natsumi's ears!"

"Sorry, Natsumi," the voice murmured.

I swallowed hard. "Where are you?" I asked, quieter this time but still firm. I moved toward the wall, pressing my palm against it. Maybe she was in another room?

"Shhh… you can use your normal voice." The whisper came again, gentle, deliberate. "I'm right here, Ryu. Standing beside you."

A chill crept up my spine. My breath caught.

"You just can't see me," she whispered.

My eyes scanned the room slowly.

"My name's Yuki Fuyuzora."

The whisper softened. "The ghost of Shin'yume-sou."