NOVEL NEXT Chapter 237
_Thud thud thud._
She thought constantly afterward.
_Where did it all go wrong?_
I definitely did everything right.
_I made a perfect plan, almost turning her into my first love._
I made her look only at me—how did everything change like that?
In the dim room, she continued to think.
_Maybe I dragged this out too long. Maybe I created too many options. Maybe I spent too much time waiting for Sara to become that perfect person. Perhaps I should have stopped when I felt she was similar enough._
Light barely seeped through the heavy blackout curtains. The dark room felt like it was after the sun had set.
Today, she recalls her face. She remembers her voice.
…But she thought it was a relief.
_No matter how many faces of a person you capture in photos, or how much you record them, once that person leaves this world, their memory tends to fade._
No record is as vivid as seeing them in person.
_The fact that she was just a reach away, aging with time as well, was such a joy._
Ah, her thoughts sank too deep.
_But the thought that this shouldn’t be happening doesn’t arise._
_Why? Why didn’t Sara choose me? Why did she try to escape, and why was I rejected?_
In the dark room, the memories of Sara popped vividly into her mind. The warmth of her sitting on her lap, the white shoulders revealed by the wedding dress, the soft cheeks and the shiny, smooth hair.
_Surely, she should have felt the same._
In that dark room, isolated from everything else, she had to focus solely on Choi Na-kyung. And every time she saw Choi Na-kyung, she should have been yearning persistently.
_But for some reason, everything unraveled._
_Why? Because of whom?_
The first face that came to mind was Yang Hye-in. She had thought of her as a mechanical maid, but suddenly she had betrayed her.
…No, that’s not right. The maid couldn’t have swayed Sara. Her nature was to not react until provoked—they couldn’t have changed Sara’s mind.
_Then who? Those kids around her? Was it because of those friends that Sara herself mentioned?_
_How?_
Rumors certainly had their effect. Rather than passively observing, it felt like they had been actively used. Buying off teachers and even some parents to inflate the rumors and make them seem real.
Even if they had nothing to lose, entering that school was incredibly hard, so the few things ‘gained’ made them hesitant to ruin it. If those students were easily admitted, they were probably kids who had too much to lose already. Naturally, they wouldn’t recklessly try something new.
_One of them was a heiress. That makes it even weirder._
…So, the change must have started with her. It had to have been Sara.
_Why? How?_
_How did Sara change? The one who seemed like she would never change, why did she change?_
_Tap, tap, tap._
_Her teeth clink._
_Fear. It’s fear._ The emotion that Choi Na-kyung felt now was fear. The fear that Sara had forever changed, and would once again leave her side.
_There might not be another chance._
_Sara was her last chance._
_What should I do?_
_How can I not lose her? How can I bring her back?_
_She needed to find and eliminate the cause. If the cause was gone, she could retrieve Sara._
_This was such a hard-earned opportunity, such good luck—there was no way she could give it all up._
_Fortunately, there was still some time left. Sara’s guardianship still belonged to her._
_But what is the cause?_
_What could it be? Find it quickly. It had to be found so that it could be eliminated._
_She struggled to recall what Sara had done when she looked at her before. She worked to remember the words she had spoken to her._
Then she remembered one thing.
You killed her!
_Yeah._
You killed Sara!
That’s what she had screamed.
_What did that mean?_
Sara suffered so much.
Sara must have suffered. It was why she had to be the only one to be Sara’s hope. But she couldn’t do that.
_Why?_
She must have felt so alone!
She must have been lonely. It was why she had to be the one to love Sara completely. She was the only one who could love her. But she couldn’t do that.
_Why?_
I loved you so much!
Choi Na-kyung trembled at the thought.
_Indeed, Sara loved me. There was no way she couldn’t. I tried so hard to make it so._
But, ‘not anymore.’
_Why?_
…….
Ah.
_Sara is dead; how could she be alive? When a person’s breath stops, and the heart stops, when the blood clots and turns rigid, turning the face white, and the body cools, and the joints refuse to move, they can never come back. She did too._
_But Sara is alive._
_Alive, yet dead?_
_What could that mean?_
_Think._
_Think._
_She had to think._
_What does that mean?_
“…Ah ha.”
_Suddenly, an absurd idea popped into her head._
_Absurd, yet… it’s not impossible._
_If the body didn’t die, then the mind did. The one who saw Sara’s mind die was within Sara. Probably someone who loved Sara._
_But who?_
_Who else could it be? It had to be Sara herself._
_Sara died. And a new Sara was born. From within Sara’s consciousness._
“I see. Yes. That was it.”
_There’s no evidence. Perhaps the scream Sara let out that day was just something she blurted out in a half-crazed state. No, ordinary people would have thought so._
_But Choi Na-kyung was someone who strayed from the ordinary._
“There’s another one inside you.”
_Then, the cause is that presence—the being born from within Sara._
_If she could just eliminate that existence, Sara could return to being Sara again._
…Even if she couldn’t come back, it wouldn’t matter. Even if she became an empty existence, it wouldn’t matter.
_Because what she wanted was her._
_Whatever it takes._
_No matter how much time it takes, no matter how much money it takes, she would surely bring her back._
_Because that’s what she decided._
_Ever since a long time ago, since the day she lost her._
Choi Na-kyung released her hands that were hugging her knees. She lowered her hands and felt something smooth.
_Smooth, hard, and rectangular. It was a phone._
_It was made by the people helping her. With this, she could call without fear of being tracked._
_But sadly, that kind of life would end now._
_She needed to bring Sara back. For that, she had to reveal herself._
“…So, we’ll meet again.”
_Her voice cracked as she spoke, sounding monstrous. If anyone had been listening nearby, they would have surely reacted with chills._
_Of course, she didn’t care at all._
_She turned on the screen. She shut her eyes against the pouring bright light._
_After opening and closing her eyes multiple times, she managed to look at her smartphone screen._
_She opened the internet browser._
_Then, she searched for the words ‘guardianship,’ ‘family,’ ‘diminished capacity,’ ‘dissociative identity disorder,’ and ‘mental hospital’ in turn._
_And she made a call._
*
“Hey, it’s Sara.”
_Since that incident, one new kid had been following behind me like a shadow._
_For some reason, after those three who had kept me and Yang Hye-in apart, Areum had begun sticking around too. Despite that, there was still a moment to talk._
…Having one more person who liked me felt a bit overwhelming.
_Ever since Areum began hanging out with us, Ha Neul, Sua, and Sohee’s expressions darkened slightly. As if they were hiding something they wanted to tell me._
_Could it be that my hanging out with Areum is bothering them?_
…It would make sense if it did. After all, Areum had kissed me by mistake.
This is all your fault.
_You being pretty is the reason; you’re an accomplice too._
……
_I think I’m starting to understand how to handle Sara._
_Putting aside Sara’s bad mood, I replied to Areum, who had spoken to me._
“Yeah?”
“I have one question, can I ask it?”
“Uh, sure.”
_I didn’t think it would be anything significant, so I answered easily._
“During your last conversation, the word ‘personality’ came up. Could I ask what that meant?”
“…Huh?”
_Not just me, even Ha Neul, Sua, and Sohee stopped, all looking shocked._
“Uh, that…”
_Such a strong reaction was unexpected, and Areum wore a downright flustered expression._
“Is it something I shouldn’t ask…?”
_She asked again with a hesitant look._
“…”
_Everyone’s gaze was on me. Even Sara seemed to be looking at me intently._
_They were saying they’d follow my lead._
“…Sigh.”
_I let out a light sigh._
“Alright, I’ll tell you.”
_Seeing Areum shrink even more at my sigh, I replied._