I Don’t Want to Be a Heroic Spirit

When Gorou woke up early in the morning, he was immediately startled by the sight of Itto, who looked like a ghostly gray shadow of himself.

"Whoa, what the—?! Did SCP-096 get loose here or something?"

"What SCP-096? That's your senior brother," came a voice from behind him.

Before Gorou could react, Kiichi Hougen appeared and smacked him on the back of his head, causing Gorou to instinctively crouch and protect his head.

"Honestly… I'm starting to regret telling you all those stories."

Kiichi Hougen had always tried to make up for her disciples' childhood shortcomings by engaging them in games or storytelling.

But in hindsight… what on earth made her think stories about SCP-096 and containment breaches were suitable for kids?

Gorou awkwardly chuckled as he turned back to see that the figure was indeed his senior brother. Yet, confusion clouded his expression.

"Why does Senior Brother look like… this?"

"Well, that's partly my fault." Kiichi Hougen squinted slightly, explaining, "Itto's progress has been faster than I anticipated. After finishing yesterday's training, he still seemed to have energy to spare. So I decided to give him a solo special training session afterward. And, well… now he looks like this."

What kind of brutal training could leave even someone like Arataki Itto looking so utterly defeated?

Gorou didn't dare to think too hard about it, let alone ask.

After all, Master would never truly harm Itto, so it was better not to push his luck with further questions.

"Have you washed up? If you're done, head to the main hall for breakfast. After breakfast, we'll rest a bit and start today's training."

"I've already washed up," Gorou replied.

Just as he was about to leave, he couldn't resist glancing back at Itto's desolate figure.

"What about Senior Brother? Isn't he coming for breakfast?"

"Oh, him?" Kiichi Hougen paused briefly, then walked away without looking back, saying, "Don't worry about him. He already ate plenty last night, so he probably isn't interested in breakfast. Besides, Sara prepared today's breakfast, and since Sara's still mad at him, she most likely didn't make him anything. Let's just leave him be."

As Kiichi Hougen's silhouette disappeared around a corner, Gorou glanced back at Itto one last time. Seeing no reaction from him, Gorou shuddered and hurried after his master.

---

During breakfast, Kiichi Hougen quickly noticed that Sara seemed out of sorts. After the meal, she decided to approach her.

"Still upset about last night?"

"Master…"

Sara's lips tightened as her inner thoughts were effortlessly laid bare by Kiichi Hougen.

"Frustrated because you couldn't catch Itto last night? After all, speed is your forte," Kiichi Hougen said nonchalantly. "Feeling a sense of urgency because of Itto's progress?"

It was only natural to feel uneasy when someone you'd always looked down on was improving faster than you, perhaps even surpassing you.

This world thrived on competition. If someone else's progress outpaced yours, it was as if you had fallen behind.

After a brief inner struggle, Sara spoke up.

"Master, I—"

"You want to train with Itto and the others, thinking that this way you won't be left behind, right?"

To Kiichi Hougen, Sara's thoughts were as plain as words written on her face.

"Ah…" Kiichi Hougen sighed lightly. "Why are you so fixated on this? Your training path is entirely different from theirs, and I've already planned everything accordingly."

"Your current focus is on mastering elemental energy. Training alongside Itto and the others would only lower your efficiency… Besides, whatever happened last night, I wasn't there to see it firsthand. But when I arrived, hadn't you already caught up to Itto using your elemental abilities? If I hadn't intervened, do you think Itto would've had the upper hand against you?"

"You're making progress too, just in areas different from theirs."

"You're overthinking this, Sara."

Lowering her head, Sara remained silent, leaving Kiichi Hougen unsure if her words had sunk in.

Hopefully, she took it to heart… Otherwise, Kiichi Hougen had no better advice to give.

Back when she was in school, Kiichi Hougen wasn't much of a talker. Social interactions were a struggle, and now, as a mentor, understanding human emotions was even harder, let alone offering guidance.

"…Go back and think it over carefully," Kiichi Hougen said with a helpless tone. "If, after thorough reflection, you're still set on your decision… I'll arrange for you to train with Itto and the others."

With that, Kiichi Hougen turned and left, leaving Sara standing there in silence.

---

And so, the matter was temporarily resolved… or at least put on hold.

Among Kiichi Hougen's three disciples, Sara was undoubtedly the sharpest.

But that also made her the most troublesome when she got stuck in a mental rut.

Hopefully, she'd figure it out herself…

"Comforting people is so exhausting…" Kiichi Hougen muttered to herself.

She'd never been good at such things, even from a young age.

There was this one time during school when a female classmate, someone she was fairly close with, had cried her heart out over something.

Everyone, including Kiichi Hougen, gathered around to console her.

Some handed her tissues, others said things like, "Don't cry, don't cry." Everyone seemed to be doing what they could.

As for Kiichi Hougen… she merely stayed by the girl's side, silent, listening as the girl vented her frustrations through sobs.

Later, a teacher arrived. Perhaps because Kiichi Hougen had been kneeling by the girl's side in a knightly posture, the teacher had commented that she looked like a knight.

A knight, huh… What kind of knight was she, really?

Other knights could slay dragons or escort princesses to their prince… But what had she done?

"…"

Standing in the courtyard, Kiichi Hougen stared at the clouds.

She was a peculiar person… Deeply afraid of loneliness and desperate for affection, yet capable of moments like this—finding solace in solitude, sinking into the peace of being alone.

"I guess I'm not as carefree as I thought I was…"

---

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