I Didn’t Even Want to Live, But God Forced Me to Reincarnate!

Long, long ago…

It was said that there was a world with only gods and goddesses living in them.

Unfortunately, calamities and conflicts engulfed the world until there were only a few remaining. The notable ones were three who were said to have created our world of Sphaela.

Aion-sama, the god or goddess of life and the nature itself, the beginning of all living beings… The Alpha.

Bahamuth-sama, the god of power and knowledge, the source of the indestructible energy… The Beta.

And then the last deity was dubbed as the Omega. It was unclear what or who exactly was the Omega, but they were called Omega because their power could bring about the world’s ending. Their name and supporters had been lost for some reason…

 

The three of them were the most powerful deities still existing up until now, or people believed they still existed until now.

Let’s put aside the fallen deities or the evil deities like Gehenna, symbolised as the gamma.

Did you know that the three almighty deities had underlings?

It was unclear if they were demi-god or just weaker deities… Not much was known about them.

But there was this legend about how a demi-god or the weaker deity serving Aion-sama then became an inhabitant in Cielle—before Cielle was even founded, before the world fell into chaos for the first time in the everlasting great war—and she became a mortal. She was called as “Vidaestinae”. Even so, she was worshipped as the deity of life in the village that she built—the Vittae village. The biggest statue in the Temple of Life build inside the Vittae village was said to be made based on how Vidaestinae looked like.

Her descendants would continue to live in that said village. They were just like other elves, perhaps with stronger magical power.

However…

Very rarely, there would be a child born with her powers.

Atavism.

An organism that would exhibit traits of distant ancestors.

The people of the temple would claim the child as the reincarnation of Vidaestinae.

 

Aside from the child’s overwhelming [Life] power, the child would be born with a peculiar mark that was said to be the mark that Vidaestinae had.

As such, it was very easy to identify the child ever since they were born.

 

…I was exactly that child in this era.

I was born in a simple family living in Vittae village.

My birth was much anticipated because I was my parents’ first-born. They had decided on my name even before my birth—Eneida.

But when my parents gazed at the ‘mark of life’ that was evident on my body, they were stunned.

 

[Every child that was born with the ‘mark of life’ shall immediately be baptized and raised by the temple as the saint.]

That was the rule that had been passed down in the generations that lived in Vittae village.

Because an atavist wouldn’t be guaranteed to exist in a century—no, seeing one in 500 years would be considered lucky—not many believed that an atavist could be born.

The Temple of Life took me away from them and I was baptized as “Eneidaestina”.

 

Of course, I didn’t have any recollection of all this.

Ever since I was aware of things, I had always lived in the temple.

When my magic was tested, it was true that I had a maxed affinity to [Life] magic, with yet another maximum mana. Yet… my affinity to other magic was a total zero.

I was told that even before anyone could teach me, I could already use [Life] magic, though they still waited for my magic test before officially declaring me as the saintess.

 

My life consisted of nothing but prayers, worships and being worshipped by others, and also bestowing blessings to everyone that needed it.

I was actually happy at that time.

Everyone that came to me would go with smiles on their faces.

I could help them all.

I could cure them of illnesses that were said to be incurable.

I could restore life to dying people.

And I believed it was the reason why I was born.

To help others like this, with my blessing.

 

But…

One day, I was playing together with my younger sister that was born not too long after I was taken away by the temple.

A landslide happened near the cliff where we were playing.

That was the accident that changed everything.

 

When I came to, my world was turned upside down.

My younger sister was drawing her last breath when I regained my consciousness, and I couldn’t restore life back to her…

Starting from that point, I realized that my power had gone.

I could no longer do miracles.

I could no longer heal others.

My sole reason of living… was robbed from me.

 

Weird things started happening after that, however.

People who were close to me, for example the priests who were serving me, would soon fall ill one by one, and eventually they passed away.

Those who were in contact with me would feel unwell.

It was then that I realized that my blessing had been replaced by a curse that did the reverse of what my blessing could do.

I seemed to suck others’ life forces.

 

My existence had gone from ‘the long-awaited girl who could bless you with vitality’ to ‘the cursed girl that could suck life out of you’… from the most anticipated to the most avoided.

People who had worshipped me suddenly turned their attitude towards me, as if it was as easy as turning the palm of their hands.

…I didn’t want to explain in detail regarding this part, but I was exiled.

Some people came and wanted to help, but I felt that I was only an object of their curiosity. My curse and history intrigued them, they didn’t want to really help me.

 

Thankfully, the kingdom heard rumours about me and went to detain me in the Tower of Exile.

Only this place was able to handle me, after all.

…

 

***

 

“…And that’s the story of my life,” Eneida said, ending her recollection.

“…”

We were all silent, trying to process what we had just heard.

 

“…Eneida, sorry, but this… is definitely far from ‘my life story is nothing special, it might bore you’… It’s… really… How do I put it…,” I muttered.

“Extraordinary!” Carbuncle said with a spark in her eyes.

Yeah. Carbuncle would normally be bored with many stories, but she didn’t seem to be distracted during when Eneida told us her story, not even once!

“Yeah… I totally didn’t expect you to have power that’s totally the opposite of your curse right now,” Clavis added.

“But the question is, how or why did your blessing turn into a curse?” Ein said, still with his hand on his chin and his eyes looking down, thinking.

“That, I am not sure of,” Eneida shook her head.

 

“Did a close contact with death turn your power into a completely different one? No, I have never heard of such thing before. If that is the case, how exactly can we reverse that? You’re already exposed to many lives yet it didn’t improve at all…,” Ein paced around the area.

“Yeah, I’m also wondering,” Eneida wryly smiled.

“Will another close contact with death or another life and death situation be able to help—”

“No, it didn’t.”

Just as Ein was saying an absurd idea, Prince Manasye quickly refuted his words.

“How did you know that?” Ein was stunned and asked as he looked at Manasye.

“Uhm… Before she was taken into our custody, a group of people… scientists it seemed, they did experiments on her,” Manasye said with a hint of sadness.

I quickly turned to look at Eneida, who hung her head down. Her expression seemed to be sad and pained as she recalled those times…

…I can’t imagine how it felt like being her.

After being worshipped, she was abandoned and shunned.

Then, the people who seemed to want to help her, they turned out to be people who treated her as an experimental object.

 

I took a serious look at the little girl who was younger and smaller than me.

Despite what life threw at her, I didn’t see any hint of resentment or even anger and hatred in her.

Eneida is strong.

Really strong.

Such experiences would usually change a person.

It wasn’t an exaggeration to say that her story could be a villain’s back story.

However, look at her.

She still seemed kind and was even worried of others.

She didn’t seem to be spiteful.

She was just… sad.

And she seemed to blame herself, although it was definitely no fault of hers.

 

I…

I really want to help her, if possible.

But how can I do that?

All that I know is… I don’t wish for such a kind and pitiful girl to lead an unhappy life.

An elf’s life was long too, I’m not sure if it’s a blessing or curse in Eneida’s case.

It means that there’s a longer time to figure out what went wrong with her and fix it, thus making her able to lead the rest of her life in happiness.

But on the contrary, it means a longer time to suffer if nobody can figure out how to help her.

 

“Well, have you tried investigating things from the source? The cliff where she fell, the place where she was treated after that fall, or even the entire village itself?” Ein asked.

“Yes. I heard that there were investigations, but there was nothing notable found,” Manasye said.

“Hmm, but have you tried investigating yourself, Eneida?” Ein asked to Eneida.

Eneida nodded her head and said, “After me and the people around me realized that some kind of curse was put on me when the people around me fell ill, the people of the temple tried to help me by finding out what caused it. They had done some purification rituals, prayers, everything, but nothing worked. We also found nothing. After that, however, they started dying and so, they stopped helping me and banished me.”

“…”

“This is harder than I thought,” Carbuncle muttered.

 

“But there must be something back there. The origin of everything. Since Eneida’s power was distorted there. It’s better to revisit and investigate things again this time. Although some time has passed after the incident, hopefully we can still find something useful,” Ein said.

“I want to go there and investigate myself, but I can’t,” Manasye shook his head as he added, “Eneida can’t go anywhere aside from this area too.”

“You’re the… I mean, with your position, shouldn’t you be able to go there?” Ein almost mentioned that Manasye was the prince, but Manasye gave him a warning stare and thankfully Ein understood Manasye’s intention and quickly changed his words.

“That is exactly why I can’t go there. I… am not like my elder sister. I am weak and not courageous enough. In short, I am not allowed to go somewhere far away yet, not without one of my family members. And with how the situation is right now, I can’t revisit the place myself in the near future,” Manasye explained.

 

Aah.

The timid prince.

And did he say he was weak?

Perhaps that was why his family became overprotective of him.

Add that the situation of the kingdom wasn’t exactly peaceful right now, it was near impossible for him to go to Vittae village right now.

 

“This is hard,” Clavis muttered.

“But…!” Manasye’s eyes suddenly brightened, as if he just thought of a good idea.

“But can you guys go there and investigate in my stead?” Manasye suddenly asked.

 

HUH?!!

I was so surprised at his words that I reflexively turned to look at Ein, who had an unreadable expression as of now.

 

What to do?

If we were to say yes, we’d go there and we could help Eneida, but…

Our main objective is to find more information about Alt-nii and the others…

If we were to say yes, we’d become unable to resume our main focus, but…

If we were to say no in this situation, wouldn’t the prince be suspicious of us?

First, we wanted to help. But when he found a way for us to help, we are suddenly unwilling to help?

 

I…

I really have a mixed feeling about this…

 

At that time, Ein’s words echoed in my mind.

‘Remember don’t be too naïve. We are no god. We are no hero. We are no main protagonist in some fiction. We can’t do everything and save everyone.’