I Became the Mother of His Child

"Wait." Xu Xiuxiu suddenly stopped Xu Fangfang's stride, "Xu Fangfang, I'm warning you, if Siya doesn't want to see you, you'd better hurry up and leave, you understand?" Xu Xiuxiu feared that Xu Fangfang would go in to beg Xu Jingjing, and if Xu Jingjing refused to meet her, she'd start screaming and shouting again—an ordeal Xu Xiuxiu certainly did not want to happen.

Allowing Xu Fangfang to seek out Xu Jingjing was because she truly seemed regretful, and also to let her, the one who started this, be the one to unring the bell, not to add distress to Xu Jingjing on purpose.

"..." Xu Fangfang, halted by Xu Xiuxiu, lacked the courage to firmly agree to what Xu Xiuxiu had said, and it was only after a long time that she spoke: "Siya won't see me." Xu Fangfang would have realized with even a shred of sense that repaying evil with kindness is extremely difficult, not something you can do just because you want to. The hurdle within one's heart is too painful, and she approached Xu Jingjing with immense resolve.

"I know." Xu Xiuxiu nodded, too.

How much Xu Jingjing detested Xu Fangfang was actually quite obvious to everyone. Why should she forgive the woman who completely ruined her future, making even the thought of starting over immeasurably difficult?

"Then..." Why do you still want me to see her? Xu Fangfang looked at Xu Xiuxiu wanting to ask, but ultimately swallowed her words.

"To make things hard for you, to make you give up hope!" Xu Xiuxiu answered the question Xu Fangfang had hesitated to voice.

"Why?" Xu Fangfang demanded angrily.

"Xu Fangfang, you should know that not everyone who makes mistakes in this world can be forgiven, and not everyone who regrets deserves sympathy. Your current plight is indeed pitiful, but it is self-inflicted. Siya never wronged you, yet her suffering is because of you; she endures a disaster that came without reason, while you are getting what you deserve." Xu Xiuxiu spoke measuredly, her words so cold they chilled to the bone.

Actually, she wanted to help Xu Fangfang, but she couldn't find the grounds to do so; she felt too much heartache for Xu Jingjing. She was so full of pity for Xu Jingjing that she couldn't bring herself to show any kindness to Xu Fangfang.

Deserved punishment! Yes, deserved punishment! But what gives Xu Xiuxiu the right to treat her like this?

"Xu Xiuxiu, if you're unwilling to lend a hand, that's fine, but do you really need to use such an excuse to disgust me? Fine! Rest assured, Xu Xiuxiu, even if my family is ruined and all is lost, I will never come begging to you again." Xu Fangfang sneered, taking a few steps into the wooden gate of the Xu Family, she huffed and turned to leave, casting one last venomous look at Xu Xiuxiu before departing.

"Eldest daughter! What foolishness are you spouting? Could you possibly still harbor resentment towards Sanya, uttering such suffocating and hurtful words?" Mrs. Xu's voice, laden with tears, suddenly rang out as she emerged from the Xu Family house, her eyes red, she glared at Xu Fangfang, and then turned her gaze pleadingly towards Xu Xiuxiu. "Sanya, I know I haven't been a good enough mother, not treating each of you as equally precious, but my hope for all four of my daughters to live well is sincere. Siya is already in such a state; could you really bear to let your father and me watch helplessly as your elder sister's family meets with misfortune? Sanya, listen to the heartfelt words of your mother, help your elder sister out. There shouldn't be so much hatred and grudges between siblings!" Mrs. Xu spoke, her tear-laden eyes focusing as she grasped Xu Xiuxiu's hand.

"How am I supposed to help? Mom, doesn't saying that give you a backache?" Xu Xiuxiu scoffed coldly. "Mom, there's a limit to favoritism. You so casually ask me with red eyes to help her, Xu Fangfang? Have you even considered whether I'm capable of helping her? When you speak up for her, you might solve her troubles, but have you thought that once you ask, you're placing me in difficulty?" Xu Xiuxiu said, her tone laced with irony.

Mr. and Mrs. Xu were such a couple, easily swayed. In the past, the original Xu Xiuxiu caused all sorts of trouble, and they tolerated it, even focusing all their care on her, fearing that Xu Xiuxiu wouldn't live well, constantly fretting over her. Now that Xu Xiuxiu no longer needed their concern, and seeing that she was doing well, that her in-laws, the Song Family, were good to her, and that Song Yuanhuan doted on her like a treasure, Mr. and Mrs. Xu's attention gradually shifted to Xu Fangfang, their hearts aching to see her struggle.

"I've said it before, if you feel sorry for her, Xu Fangfang, you're more than welcome to help her, and I won't stop you. But if you can't help her yourself, please don't always use your status as parents to talk about so-called kinship to pressure me, okay? When you utter a word, it's just the lips coming together, but have you thought about whether I can afford to give 3,000 yuan, and if I can, whether my in-laws, the Song Family, would have thoughts about it? I just gave birth to two children, are both children well? I'm not even finished with my postpartum confinement, and I have to go out in the cold; could I possibly get sick from this? Have you considered any of this for me?" To be honest, Xu Xiuxiu was disappointed.

The need to be strong on her own, the burden of handling everything on her own, weighed heavily on her. All she wanted was to live a good life; could they really not consider why she insisted on going out during her confinement? Could she truly be so careless about her own health?

"No, none of what I've mentioned have you considered. You only see Xu Fangfang at her wit's end, but you've never thought about whether I'd be in a difficult position, nor have you considered whether Siya is suffering because of Xu Fangfang. You're right to be pained to see Siya suffering, and you know that Song Wenshu got his comeuppance, but does that allow you to ignore mine and Siya's feelings? Is your haggard, stricken appearance because of Jingjing? No, it's because you've been worried about her, Xu Fangfang, all night. Mom, does it mean that because I have never truly blamed you, you assume I am magnanimous enough to let bygones be bygones for the sake of kinship?"

Xu Xiuxiu's emotions were a bit agitated. Frankly, she really detested the moral boundaries and so-called family shackles forcibly imposed upon her. Everyone sees things from a different perspective, feels differently; why do they always force their own thoughts onto others? Xu Xiuxiu was nothing more than a flesh-and-blood woman who could feel pain and cry.

So what if I don't want to help Xu Fangfang? Have they ever considered that I, Xu Xiuxiu, could not possibly be a divine figure capable of anything?

"Xiuxiu is right, help what? All the sisters are grown up and have their own families, and everyone should sweep the snow from their own doorstep. What free time do they have to worry about someone else's troubles? Xu Fangfang comes back to her parents' home crying over her massive debts, and you expect Sanya to selflessly help her? Does Sanya owe her anything?" Xu Qingqing suddenly spoke up, and not long after, Xu Qingqing appeared from the direction of the left side of the Xu Family's main gate.