I Became the Final Subjugation Target of That Era’s Light Novel

Chapter 394



Youth.

There may be various opinions about the scope of that word, but most would agree that it generally includes ‘teenagers.’

In life, those ten years that pass by unnoticed have a tremendous impact on the rest of one’s life.

The things I did, the things I liked, and the things I saw during that time end up defining and determining what I want to do even in my 20s and 30s.

No matter how much time passes, the things I enjoyed the most back then continue to come to mind, often leading to me doing them again and again. Perhaps the constant reboots and remakes of old movies and cartoons stem from this, as people who spent their childhood in that era still want to see those things.

Then, what about the part of Kagami’s youth that has been left empty?

Honestly, that was a hard part to guess. My childhood Kagami hardly had any real ‘personal life.’

Kagami, who had to earn money alone to support herself rather than in a dual-income family, moved solely for her own sake even on weekends. She would go grocery shopping nearby or play in the nearby park.

When at home, she would either lie down or sit and rest, tightly hugging me. In some ways, that would be an emotional recharge for her. As a mom who truly loved me, hugging her calm daughter must have eased her heart.

The problem was that Kagami’s hobbies were just that.

If Kagami had been an ordinary teenage girl during that time, she would have talked with friends about what she saw  on TV at home. She might have shared stories about the latest anime or a just-released movie.

But Kagami couldn’t do that. There were no friends to share such talks with.

…Kagami’s youth was filled with my childhood.

I probably can’t give her back those days.

But still, as Kagami’s only friend, I wanted to play with her. I wanted to find at least a piece of her youthful joys that she had missed.

“…”

“How is it?”

Anyone traveling with their mom on a school trip would likely be seen as a serious codependency case — but, who could say that showing my mom things she had never really enjoyed wasn’t fun?

Thinking back on Kagami tagging along on my school trip, it felt possible that she had come to this place.

“It’s beautiful.”

Kagami quietly said while looking down at the red maple leaves. It seemed she truly hadn’t seen them in a proper way.

When one thinks of Kyoto, visiting famous spots that come to mind is the proper attitude of a school tripper. Yuka and Sota probably had already been to such places, but I was still relieved they quietly followed us.

While it was money I received from Kagami, I made sure to use it to buy her various snacks. Kagami felt really sorry and wanted to spend her own money, but I didn’t really want to feel like I was mooching off her.

It felt like I was using Kagami as my wallet while taking her around to eat various things.

Thinking about it, I had never seen Kagami gain weight. Well, considering her age, I thought that maintaining her figure was probably normal, but at the same time, it made me feel like I was looking at a child who wasn’t getting enough to eat.

I wasn’t too sure if it was okay to feel that way towards my mom.

“…”

The more I handed different things to Kagami and led her around, her expression gradually changed.

At first, she looked a bit excited and joyful, but now it somehow turned into a calm smile. Even when I reminded her to look over there with my hand, Kagami kept only looking at my face.

“Mom?”

I asked, feeling a little uneasy.

Did I go too far?

Was I bringing her around without considering the age difference too much?

But while I worried about that, Kagami was already hugging me tightly.

“Koto Ne.”

Kagami’s whispering voice reached from above my head.

“Thank you, Koto Ne.”

“…”

Kagami’s words made me feel something release from my body.

Perhaps I had been a bit tense all day. Until now, I had only been receiving from Kagami.

It seems like it was a bit concerning that I was taking Kagami around instead of her taking me.

“I always thought of you as a child, but you’ve already grown up so sturdy.”

Kagami said while hugging me tightly.

“Thank you, really.”

“…”

I wanted to say I still wasn’t.

I remembered things about my previous life. I had a fairly long period of working, during which I even lost a colleague who worked with me.

I maintained those memories as a member of society for quite some time, but still, I thought I always felt somewhat like a child.

I guess all adults feel that way.

Even when I turned 20, knowing I could buy alcohol, cigarettes, and go out wherever alone, while graduating from college and earning money, I would see myself aging in the mirror.

I thought that, somewhere inside, I always had aspects of feeling like a child.

While I kept my youthful hobbies from back in the day, I also delved deeper into them, spending my own money.

The friends I met didn’t change much from that time, and when I saw my mom or dad, somehow I felt at ease and found myself speaking like I did in childhood.

Even after crossing over into this world — I thought the same.

After all, having my body turned into that of a child, it would be strange not to think that way anymore.

I hadn’t fully grown up yet. Even when I eventually lived apart from Kagami, I would feel the same way.

When that time comes, how will Kagami perceive life?

Will she regret the moments she spent raising me? Will she feel that time was wasted only after going through a long future?

I hope Kagami doesn’t think that way.

We held each other for a while.

Passersby, and Yuka and Sota looked at us, but I didn’t feel embarrassed.

I knew that this kind of close embrace would eventually come to an end someday.

*

Kagami often thought of her daughter Koto Ne.

In fact, saying ‘often’ might be a bit of an understatement. It could be more accurate to say she thought about Koto Ne almost all the time.

At first, she just considered Koto Ne to be a reason to live.

Before that, her life was simply one of existing, a life where even dying wasn’t allowed.

When she impulsively ran out while hugging young Koto Ne, even that reason didn’t properly register as she frantically fled.

From that moment on, Kagami’s reason to live slowly transformed into Koto Ne.

She first communicated with someone. She met someone who didn’t desire anything other than her being there.

Although she had given birth to a daughter out of coercion, that daughter only needed her.

Kagami still couldn’t forget the moment when that tiny hand grasped her finger tightly.

And now that child had grown to embrace Kagami tightly with both arms.

If it hadn’t been for Koto Ne, she might have never received such hugs for a lifetime.

“…”

Kagami let go of Koto Ne.

The hug was nice, but it couldn’t last forever. Koto Ne wasn’t Kagami’s possession.

At the very least, she wanted Koto Ne not to receive the same treatment Kagami had endured in that household.

“Koto Ne, that’s enough for today.”

“By ‘today’ do you mean we’ll meet again tomorrow?”

I would like that, but of course, if Koto Ne didn’t want to, I wouldn’t push it.

Kagami had no plans to leave this area despite her own thoughts. She still felt uneasy. At least until the other side completely vanished.

Koto Ne was already fighting while shedding blood. Kagami couldn’t do anything about it. If she didn’t do something, she felt her heart wouldn’t settle.

“I’m okay, Mom.”

Koto Ne said.

“Tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, it doesn’t matter if we go home together.”

Ah.

How could such a child have come to find me? Kagami thought.

“…I should have fun with my friends.”

As Kagami gently stroked Koto Ne’s head, Koto Ne smiled brightly. That smile was natural, unlike before.

Although the situation was deepening to the point where they couldn’t step back, Koto Ne always smiled like that. Rather, it seemed she had learned how to smile regardless of the situation as time passed.

It was admirable and pitiful.

…If only Koto Ne were someone else’s daughter, she would probably have lived an ordinary and happy life.

Though Koto Ne would likely get angry if she heard this.

“Still, I want to see your face.”

Koto Ne said, smiling.

Seeing that smile, Kagami couldn’t help but smile back.

Now, Kagami felt like she couldn’t withstand Koto Ne.



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