I Became the Academy’s Kibitz Villain

After a while.

In the afternoon, inside an old freight train heading from Kaesong to Sinuiju.

“Living to see the ruined old North Korean land through a train journey like this.”

“Indeed.”

Yumir and I took seats in a different special cabin from Taejo, preparing for what would happen in Sinuiju.

As it was discovered that we were extraordinary ability users and since Taejo was in another cabin, Yumir and I, having released our transformations and set up a barrier, sat facing each other in our original forms.

“Have you ever been here before, oppa?”

“I came once on a mission, but it was just for the mission. This is my first time taking a leisurely train trip like this.”

Since coming into this world, I had experienced another new thing I couldn’t in my original world.

Of course, we hadn’t left the peninsula yet, but going up to Sinuiju was a new experience in itself.

“What about you, Yumir?”

“It’s my first time traveling by train with a man.”

“You’re subtly appealing there, but that’s good.”

I pulled Yumir’s cheek as she sent me a suggestive smile.

“Don’t do that when others are around. Only when we’re alone or with women who can safely talk without masks on. Understand?”

“Uh-huh…”

“And your answer?”

“Yes, sir.”

Although she showed a bit of dissatisfaction, Yumir nodded her head enthusiastically after last night’s definite ranking arrangement.

“I did it because I thought you would like it, oppa.”

“I don’t. Make sure to remember that.”

I faced Yumir.

“It may look like I freely build relationships with you and Baek Seol-hee, but I have clear boundaries too. What you suggested on the train clearly crossed that line. Got it?”

“It’s complicated.”

“There’s nothing complicated about it. Just think simply that I’m a very selfish trash villain guy.”

“A selfish trash villain… Ah!”

Yumir immediately understood the combination of words.

“So, it’s okay for you to meet other women and be patriotic, but I can’t even hold hands with another man?”

“Exactly.”

“That’s amazing. The mindset of ‘I can cheat, but you all must only look at me.’”

It sounded like the epitome of a trashy guy, but I once had this perspective.

As a single reader.

From a unicorn’s standpoint.

As an author who attempted to distribute heroines, I was even ready to cast an ultimate 7,800 skill rather than the 5,700 skill.

And after coming to this world.

Meeting the Chief and four executives, I didn’t abandon that unicorn mindset.

“Mir.”

“Yes, oppa.”

“Isn’t it okay for someone like me to wish for that?”

“…….”

“I’m not like Taejo, who messes with dozens or hundreds of people. The number of people I’ve had a deep relationship with isn’t even in the double digits.”

“Oh, really?”

Yumir’s previously ambiguous expression brightened for a moment.

“I thought all the S-classes from other countries, especially those cooperating with the society, had their gates opened by Goblin’s Bat.”

“No.”

While I couldn’t speak for the Goblin’s past as a player, the women I had met since deciding to live as Do Ji-hwan could be counted on both hands.

Even just the five people from the society already filled one hand, leaving only a few fingers unoccupied. But still, it was not wrong.

“I thought you had already messed with women like Nadeshiko or Jeongguk Heungdo Wang.”

“It seems you had a big misunderstanding. I’m not that promiscuous.”

“I heard Nadeshiko wants the Goblin’s child, so I thought it was already done.”

“No.”

“But if she wants it and it benefits the society, you’d do it, right?”

“Depending on the situation.”

Originally, I entered the academy for the beauty strategy.

I couldn’t deny that.

“But I’m a man of principles. The women I meet, I do so with permission. Unlike Taejo, who acts without any restraint and even overturns his fiancée’s attire, I report everything. I even send videos.”

“So, cheating with permission isn’t cheating but a netorase play?”

“Where did you learn such a professional term?”

“It was detailed in the Hero Wiki during the Hyangdan incident.”

“Click.”

In the process of dealing with demons, I didn’t hesitate to use any means, and now this karma was coming back.

Maybe that’s why Yumir acted that way.

“Yumir, I’ll say it again. I don’t like you holding hands with another man.”

“Oh my.”

“I also don’t like showing our contribution to the nation’s birthrate to another man.”

“But it’s okay to show it to women who also contribute to the birthrate?”

“Yes. And… I don’t want you to be with other men anymore.”

As I spoke openly, Yumir’s lips curled up as if they might touch her ears.

“Tell me one more thing. Something decisive, just one more thing.”

“I.”

Holding Yumir’s shoulders, I faced her.

“I hope that the man you date in your life starts and ends with me. I wish I were the only one in your life. If another man has to settle in your heart.”

I placed my hand on her chest where her heart would be.

“That should only be our son born between you and me.”

“……Wow.”

Yumir placed her hand over mine on her chest.

“Anyone listening might think you’re the protagonist of a pure love novel. Even though you’re someone who meets this girl and that girl with the permission of your main wife, sending videos of your patriotism. But.”

Yumir reached her hand behind my neck and lifted her body slightly.

“That’s why I like it even more.”

A warmth touched my lips.

“As long as I don’t look at anyone else, you’ll keep looking at me, right?”

That warmth wasn’t cold, nor did it taste like blood, it was just soft.

“If it’s not permitted, you won’t look at other women either.”

“Of course.”

“……I want to take it.”

Yumir’s eyes curved like crescent moons.

“I want the place of the woman who can hold you like this.”

“It’s not something you can easily get. It’s not something you can have no matter what you do to me.”

“It’s okay. I can learn bit by bit. Then….”

Just like before, Yumir, smiling brightly, placed her hand on my shoulder and stood up.

“Oppa is in your original form, I’m in my original form, no one else is here, and we set up a barrier so no one can see us, right? Then, it’s okay here, right?”

“…….”

In terms of location.

There was no problem at all.

“You’re addicted.”

“You made me like this, oppa, so take responsibility. When I see you, it keeps throbbing here… um, how should I say it? It keeps fluttering here…?”

“…….”

Ugh.

My head.

“It must be a serious addiction.”

The original protagonist seemed uninterested in such things despite having a harem, but now that Yumir had known a man, she seemed to no longer be the original protagonist.

“Do you like it that much?”

“Yes. If possible, I’d want to slow down relative time and enjoy it.”

“What?”

“Create a barrier where time flows faster inside than outside, enjoy everything with you, and come out satisfied to find only 3 minutes have passed outside.”

“It’s really serious.”

“See, it’s you who made me like this, oppa?”

When the person in question told me to take responsibility, what could I do?

“You’re making me worried that you’ll actually develop such a technique.”

“I’ll develop it. At a place of your choice, where 30 minutes inside the barrier feels like only 3 seconds outside. I’ll call it ‘Hyper Patriotism Time’.”

“…Taejo developed the Asura’s Hand through patriotism, now you want to become a god who controls space-time through patriotism.”

“Hehe.”

Seeing her laugh like a puppy, how could I say anything?

Maybe.

This was Yumir’s self-defense mechanism to relieve dissatisfaction and frustration after seeing the world’s evil and filth.

“Mir, have you ever thought about destroying the world?”

“What?”

“This filthy world, with a thought of mutual destruction.”

“…Hmm.”

Yumir twisted her lips slightly.

“Well, it’d be a lie to say no. But whenever I do.”

She clutched my hand tightly.

“After being with you, I want to find better things in this world.”

As expected.

I finally understood.

“Yumir, if I’m wrong about you, correct me right away.”

“Yes.”

“You’re lewd.”

“Someone awakened my true nature.”

“And you like being with me too much.”

“That’s wrong. The phrase ‘being with you’ is wrong. There’s no one else I do it with, so ‘with you’ is misleading. It makes it seem like I’m comparing it with someone else.”

“You crave me all the time to the point that we have these conversations.”

“Then, you know what to do, right?”

Yumir looked up at me with golden, sparkling eyes and pointed behind me with anticipation.

“The barrier is perfect. Before we reach Sinuiju-”

“…There are 10 minutes left.”

“…”

Yumir’s face crumpled in an instant.

Click.

It was probably an illusion, but it felt like a meteor counter went up.

“Mir.”

“Yes.”

“After we arrive, I’ll tell Taejo we’re 30 minutes late, so let’s focus on work right after, okay?”

“…Hehe. Oh, by the way.”

Yumir whispered to me with a slightly apologetic face.

“…If you make it feel like 10 minutes is 30 minutes, I’ll endure it.”

“…I need to be three times faster.”

It was probably an illusion, but it felt like the meteor counter disappeared.

Yeah.

Think positively.

I was controlling the being who was able to destroy the world with the Goblin’s Bat and patriotism.

“Mir, what will you do if I die or disappear?”

“…Hmm, maybe drag the sun and blow up the earth?”

“Don’t.”

“Hehe.”

For the peace and survival of the world.

Today, I engaged in an affair.