I Became a Villainous Character with a Limited Lifespan

Episode 43



Episode 43

– The number you have dialed does not exist. Please check the number and dial again.

Seok-hyung was startled by the mechanical voice flowing out of the cell phone and checked the number on the screen again. The number that couldn’t be confused even if he could recite it right after waking up from sleep was floating on the display.

However, even when he called again, all that came back was the mechanical voice with a stiff tone saying that the number currently being called does not exist.

Denying the reality that was clearly visible was only a loss to oneself. Seok-hyung, who understood the situation before long, let out a small hollow laugh.

‘For a businessman, changing numbers is no different from saying they’ll quit work.’

It was something Seung-hyun had said when he tried to change his number someday. He had also self-deprecatingly said that he wasn’t great enough for business partners to individually save his changed number.

But he was a born workaholic and hated inefficiency, so he probably wouldn’t have changed his number even after reaching such a position.

That was natural. That’s what he thought. But these days, Seung-hyun seemed like a completely different person.

Seok-hyung also knew that a life with an end and a life that can dream of the future have to be different. But can it change this much?

He didn’t fully know Seung-hyun’s life, but he prided himself on knowing what kind of person he was better than anyone else in the world. Perhaps even the parts that Seung-hyun himself couldn’t see.

The anxiety and weakness that existed within that always sensitive-looking interior, the way he protected himself expressed through hysteria. He thought he knew everything.

“Even when it’s time to die… there are parts that won’t change no matter what happens.”

The appearance that seemed to have given up on everything, the calmness with which he called the work he had clung to all his life a nuisance. It was so unfamiliar that it was unbelievable to think that circumstances had changed a person.

Seok-hyung was always someone who cared for Seung-hyun. Some compared him to a dog, but he was even happy to be called a loyal dog. He even felt pride that anyone could see that he and Seung-hyun were tied together with such a bond.

If the current Seung-hyun saw Seok-hyung, he might make a slightly creepy face. But Seok-hyung rather didn’t understand such Seung-hyun.

“It was you, Director, who made me like this.”

It was also Seung-hyun who taught him the coldness of the world when he knew nothing, and how to endure facing it. Seung-hyun was Seok-hyung’s world, no different.

That it was just a temporary whim. Thinking that as long as Han Seung-hyun is Han Seung-hyun, he will someday want this situation again, he was preparing for him. But. 

“Don’t doubt. There’s no need to doubt.”

Seok-hyung put the cell phone on the desk and looked out the window. It wasn’t a familiar view. What was familiar to him was the view through the window of Seung-hyun’s office at HJ, or the secretarial office attached next to it.

“As long as Executive Han is Executive Han… a person can’t change that much. So this is.”

This is for him. Seok-hyung muttered to himself for who knows how many times. The face he had last seen, it hadn’t been long but it was strangely blurry, he tried to draw Seung-hyun’s face and bit his lip hard.

“This is all for you.”

A small voice that couldn’t reach anyone resounded through his teeth.

***

“Suddenly getting chills…”

Seung-hyun shivered at the sudden chill he felt. Come to think of it, the weather had gotten quite cold.

“Winter is coming soon…”

It was around the time of entering fall when he first became Han Seung-hyun, and now that season was ending.

That meant at least 25 percent of the time given to him had passed.

‘I don’t like that.’

At first, he thought this kind of life was good too. Anyway, he was dead, and even if he had lived, the situation was on the verge of his being gay being revealed. 

Moreover, he would have been seriously injured, so he would definitely need to be hospitalized for at least a month, but there was no way he had that kind of money.

‘Since I don’t have insurance either… I thought it was better to die cleanly at once.’

It wasn’t that he didn’t have a family to grieve, but it was the same for everyone that just making a living was burdensome, so rather than making them bear the burden of his hospital bills, it might be better to end it after being sad for a while.

So he thought the present, where he could enjoy daily life without worrying about money as long as he took his medicine faithfully, although with a time limit, was better. At first, he definitely thought so, but…

The more he felt satisfaction with his current life, the more he gradually had lingering feelings. It was a life where he was always busy and lived with anxiety that someone might notice his secret.

Now, time was what he had left, and since the end was set anyway, he was living each day where it didn’t matter what he did. Rather, because of that, the desire to live was gradually growing.

But… perhaps there was an even bigger reason than that. A more decisive reason for him to think that if only the time left for him was a little longer.

He told him not to say it, but in the world, are there only things you know by hearing them in words? Seung-hyun wasn’t completely sure what feelings Jae-young had for him, but at least he knew what nature they were.

And Seung-hyun didn’t dislike those feelings. The fact that those feelings that only existed on the screen could become his own, the fact that someone expressed such feelings to him was good in itself.

But he didn’t want to admit it. He didn’t want to recall the two letters of the name of the emotion that filled his head.

“No. Useless thoughts…”

Both the lingering feelings for life and the feelings he once had a fantasy about. They were things not allowed for the current Seung-hyun.

They had to be untrue, feelings that shouldn’t deepen any further. Seung-hyun shook his head and lightly slapped both his cheeks.

In fact, he knew what the wisest action was. Even now, to draw the line with Jae-young and distance himself from him so that neither lingering feelings nor hope would arise, he knew it was the right choice, but…

Wouldn’t this much greed be okay? Jae-young’s feelings probably started from curiosity and novelty, so it might not last long. He just wanted to think that way.

It had to be so that he could rationalize that he knew his feelings but couldn’t completely push him away.

“I need something else… anything to focus on.”

Seung-hyun shook his head and wandered around the living room that was now quite filled with things. He didn’t want to do outdoor activities in the gradually cooling weather, but he had to do something to shake off stray thoughts.

‘Should I go for a short walk? Getting some cold air might refresh my mind.’

And while doing that, let’s think about what to do tomorrow and the day after. Seung-hyun changed into comfortable outdoor clothes and zipped up his outerwear to the top of his neck.

It was good up to the point of energetically going out.

“It’s cold.”

The weather entering early winter was a bit chillier than he thought. Should I have worn thicker clothes when I came out?

‘No, won’t it get a bit warmer if I walk?’

He pondered for a moment whether to go back in and change clothes now, but decided to walk like this and took a step.

It had been about a week since he moved. During that time, Jae-young had visited Seung-hyun’s house one more time.

‘There are many empty rooms.’

‘If you like sleeping on the bare floor without a blanket or pillow, do as you please.’

When he made an excuse that there was no bedding for the transparently visible request, he inwardly hoped he would say it was okay. The answer Seung-hyun wanted didn’t come back, but it wasn’t like Jae-young gave up meekly either.

‘Then it’s solved.’

Seung-hyun couldn’t stop Jae-young from buying this and that on the spot as if he was going to set up his room furnishings in someone else’s house. It might be more accurate to say he didn’t stop him.

I shouldn’t be swayed, it shouldn’t deepen. But it was always just a thought.

“Was I such an indecisive person…”

When it shouldn’t be, he should have coldly cut it off, but he was only being dragged along in a relationship, and while feeling stupid himself, he didn’t want to end it.

If he ended up hearing those words like this, then he would really have to cut off this relationship.

‘I guess I’m destined to have no connection with dating.’

Seung-hyun smiled self-deprecatingly. Unlike his mood, the sunlight was dazzling. It was an ambiguous time between morning and afternoon, but quite a lot of people were passing by in the park.

‘There are many people walking their dogs.’

And most of their hands held a handle connected to a leash. Well, I guess this is the only place nearby to walk them. Seung-hyun looked at the dogs walking around in a good mood.

‘I wanted to raise one.’

He liked animals, but he knew that it was a bad thing for someone who couldn’t even take care of his own body to take responsibility for a life just because it was cute.

Not being able to raise one was the same now. Going out for a walk occasionally and watching would be the best. He sat on a park bench for a moment and looked at the dogs passing by.

Perhaps because it was a wealthy neighborhood, they all had a well-managed appearance, with no trace of tear stains on their faces.

“Woof!”

“…?”

How long had he been like that? A feisty sound was heard from behind his legs. When he lowered his head, he saw a puppy sticking its wet nose against Seung-hyun’s calf.


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