I Am Your Natural Enemy

When dawn was about to break, the Old Lady with a Fox Face gently stroked Sparrow Cat's head.

"Remember to go back, send my regards, and come visit this old crone whenever you have time. I wouldn't dare promise anything else, but when it comes to roast chicken, this old lady is second to none."

"Okay, okay, definitely, definitely." Sparrow Cat nodded repeatedly.

To the side, Lord Zhu picked up his teacup, took a sip, and then casually crunched down the entire cup as well.

He stood up, shook out the long robe on his body.

"All right, time to go, this tea is pretty average, I'll send you some good stuff next time. And these cups are nothing special, just mass-produced factory products—I'll get you a set later."

Lord Zhu glanced around the room and beckoned at the two ghosts.

"Come on, you two, get over here."

The two ghosts didn't dare say anything, eyes downcast, shuffling over obediently.

"Kneel."

Lord Zhu glanced at one Single-Horned Evil Ghost, swung a slap across its face, smacking it so hard its face went crooked.

"Go back and tell that Old Ghost of Mount Qilian to stop messing around at his age—this slap is for him."

The Single-Horned Evil Ghost didn't make a sound, not even daring to protest that it wasn't from Mount Qilian.

Lord Zhu looked at the other ghost, a scrawny hanged ghost in a long robe, and gave him a big smack across the face as well.

"You, at least, were supposedly an educated man. How come you're so dumb? No wonder you couldn't pass the exams and ended up hanging yourself. When you get back, report to the Scorching Sun Department and have them send you to Guanzhong Commandery. If you're not there within three days, find another place and hang yourself again."

"All right, let's go, let's go. Never did find out which Flying Zombie showed up—shame I never got to meet them."

The Old Ghost strode away, not even glancing back.

The remaining ghost objects didn't dare say a word either, and each slipped away on their own.

"All right, break it up, dawn's about here."

The Old Lady with a Fox Face hauled up the red-haired fox, whose two legs had been broken, and started heading back the way she came.

Lady Lie, who hadn't spoken the whole night, stood there, respectfully seeing off the two big shots.

When everyone had left, Sparrow Cat glanced at Lady Lie.

"Remember, don't pocket the good stuff the boss gave you."

Watching Sparrow Cat fly off, Lady Lie finally let out a long breath.

This whole night was sheer torture. Good thing Wan Jun had made her preparations ahead of time, otherwise today might've just been the anniversary of their deaths.

...

The journey was smooth, and by the time they returned to Virtue City, it was already daylight.

Wen Yan first gave Director He a call to book the deluxe luxury furnace in advance.

When he arrived, Old Zhang had already finished prepping the furnace—he could crank up the blaze at any time.

Standing at the Funeral Home's entrance, Gan Tang gave it a look. It was an ordinary-looking funeral home, but to her eyes, it suddenly seemed changed.

Rotting, deep, saturated with a heavy, terrifying aura—at its core, it felt like some great horror lurked within. Everything was quiet, but laden with danger.

"I'm not going in. I'll wait for you outside. You'd best not come here at night, either."

"Don't worry, Aunt Gan. I work the day shift here—it's not open at night, anyway."

"Mm, off you go, then."

Wen Yan hefted the two urns and entered the Funeral Home, heading straight for the Cremation Department. Old Zhang was already waiting, rubbing his hands in excitement.

"That other luxury furnace—it hasn't been fired up with full power in a long time. One run wastes a hundred thousand in materials, plus another hundred thousand for reconditioning and maintenance."

But as soon as he saw Wen Yan carrying two urns, his smile dropped and he turned serious.

The weirder the stuff that needs burning in a luxury furnace, the more dangerous it is.

Wen Yan personally placed the Fake Mo Zhicheng's ash urn in the deluxe luxury furnace, smashed the urn, and closed the furnace door.

As for Uncle's remains, Wen Yan hesitated for a moment but put them in the standard luxury furnace for sterilization.

Even though he knew Uncle was gone and the ashes themselves didn't matter, just because he knew that didn't mean others wouldn't have ideas.

Everyone thought Big Executor was dead, but some people still knew the truth. What if someone tried to make use of Uncle's ashes?

Might as well toss them in the luxury furnace for a little disinfection—safer that way.

Both luxury furnaces blazed at once. In Old Zhang's words, this hadn't happened in ages.

Especially that deluxe luxury furnace—every run required a report and the director's signature.

Even through the door, Wen Yan could feel the searing heat. This cremation was perfectly quiet—nothing strange happened at all.

By standard, an hour should have been enough, but Wen Yan told Old Zhang to wait a little longer.

The two luxury furnaces burned for two hours straight, then cooled down for another hour before Old Zhang, following normal procedures, finally gathered the ashes inside.

For Uncle, he prepared a Golden Pagoda, carefully collecting the ashes and sealing them up. Later, he'd have Zhang Laoxi find a good feng shui spot for burial.

As for the Fake Mo Zhicheng's remains, those would go the sea burial route as per procedure.

This guy got lucky—if he'd run into someone else, he'd never have enjoyed such treatment.

Firing up the deluxe luxury furnace once meant burning money—hundreds of thousands, just like that.

Once everything was finished, the director's office got it all squared away, making sure all paperwork was in order.

Zhang Laoxi drove Wen Yan and the rest, heading directly south towards the sea burial site.

After three hours to the coast, then boarding a ship, they reached the place designated for sea burials. Following the staff's advice, Wen Yan went to the downwind side and scattered the Fake Mo Zhicheng's ashes little by little into the sea.

Once the entire process was done, Wen Yan finally let out a deep breath.

This chapter was finally closed.

In the past, Wen Yan had wondered: since some people's ashes might cause problems, isn't it risky to dump them in the sea?

But then he figured, the ashes would scatter across such a vast area, and the tide would have long since washed them everywhere, eventually becoming fertilizer for marine plants.

Scientifically speaking, at such a low density, even if they were poisonous, they've become harmless.

And from a mysticism point of view—if someone who died on land has their ashes cast into the sea, then neither the land nor the ocean has jurisdiction. They're totally screwed, finished for good.