I Am A Table [LitRPG Isekai Progression Fantasy]

Blorbo held his metaphorical breath. If Lena was going to learn 'unlighted' magic (the robed mage's word, not his), it had to be something truly spectacular. He envisioned grand, world-shattering spells, the kind that reshaped landscapes and defied the laws of reality itself. Perhaps Lena would learn Shadowmend, summoning colossal beasts of shadow, or wield unholy energies that could unravel the fabric of existence itself! We're talking Umbral Genesis here. He pictured her commanding legions of spectral warriors, or maybe even… teleporting entire cities! Oh, oh! I've got a name! Realm-Shattering Displacement! Now that would be worth all this nonsense.

"Now, for your first leszzon," the robed mage spoke ominously, "we zhall begin wizh ze art of… ze Small, Decidedly Insignificant Weed Unlightener."

The Small what?

The mage extended a finger towards a particularly robust weed that Blorbo didn't know was there before. "Conzzzentrate, cabbage mongress. Draw upon ze unlighted, inner darkness… and make ze weed… jussst a bit… darker."

Lena squinted at the weed concentratedly. Blorbo, meanwhile, was undergoing an internal existential crisis. This is it? This is the culmination of their perilous journey into the city's underbelly, the grand introduction to 'unlighted' magic? Making a weed slightly darker?

"The weeds have always been too green for my liking!" Lena nodded furiously, having never commented anything about weed in her life.

"First, ze preparation!" the mage declared. He then began to contort his gloved hand into a series of elaborate, almost dance-like gestures, sweeping and swirling through the air. "You mussszt feel ze flow… ze connection to ze umbral essence!"

Lena, eyes wide with fascination, immediately pulled out the tiny wooden wand from her satchel.

She mirrored the mage's movements earnestly, but she was getting it slightly wrong every single time.

She's totally going to summon that dragon again, isn't she…

"This is so cool!" Lena exclaimed. "But why are we learning this first, of all things?"

The robed mage paused his swirling motions and said, "Zis is more of an exercise zan anything. For zis… Small, Decidedly Insignificant Weed Unlightener… we are engaging with the interplay of two pillars zat dark magic… I mean unlighted magic, by default enter a transaction with. Remember, zis is unlighted magic. If you must, you must tell people you are learning unlighted magic. You hear?"

"Yes, yes."

The mage nodded mysteriously. "First, ze Pillar of Structure. Ze unlighted magic reformsss, you see. It takes ze inherent form of ze weed and… reassembles ze light-absorbing properties of its very being, forcing it to accept darkness instead of light. We are enforcing a new solidity of shadow upon its form."

The mage then made a weirdly sluggish motion with his other hand, drawing an invisible thread from the air. "And second, and perhaps more importantly for unlighted magic, ze Pillar of Invocation. We are not simply commanding ze weed to be darker. We are making an agreement wizh ze essence of unlightness itself. Your connection to zis nascent unlighted force… zey dictate how much ze unlightness will manifest."

"How does the darkness decide how much darkness it would like to impose on the weed?" Lena asked.

The robed mage's gloved hand moved, not in a grand, sweeping gesture, but in a series of incredibly precise, almost minute twitching motions. He held his palm flat, then curled his fingers in one by one.

"It reads this," he hissed, his voice a sibilant whisper, his focus entirely on the minuscule changes in his hand. He flattened his palm again, then gently twisted his wrist. "All of zis is part of ze agreement. Watch closely." The mage pushed his fingertips together ever so slightly. He then drew them apart with painstaking slowness. "Ze degree to which you compress ze air around ze weed, ze pressure you exert, ze speed at which you draw ze energy… zese are ze syllables of ze agreement. A quick, sharp motion might lead to a harsh, sudden darkening. A slow, deliberate curl of ze finger, like zis…" he demonstrated, his finger barely moving, "might create a deep, pervasive unlightening."

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He opened his hand fully, then slowly, with intense concentration, closed it into a loose fist, as if gently cupping a fragile glass. "Ze clearer your movements, ze more precise your intent, ze better ze unlightness will respond." He paused, then gestured back to Lena's wand. "Now, try again!"

Okay, this makes sense. It seems to make TOO much sense. Surely nothing goes wrong.

Lena poked her tongue out from the corner of her mouth as she mimicked the mage's hand movements. She curled her fingers inward, but a little too quickly. She twisted her wrist, but with a bit too much force. She cupped her hand, but her fingers splayed out at odd angles.

Okay. Just little mistakes. Surely it won't affect the outcome.

"Will me having a table strapped to my back affect the outcome?" Lena asked as she waved her tiny wand forcefully.

The robe stopped and stared at her. "Not unless that table is—"

The air crackled.

Instead of the weed darkening, a swirling vortex of sugary, rainbow-colored light erupted from the tip of her wand. The air filled with the scent of cotton candy and the sound of a jaunty, almost circus-like tune. And then, with a POP, a figure materialized before them.

A candy dragon queen perched precariously on a giant lollipop, a dainty teacup clutched in one claw, her expression a mix of regal annoyance and utter bewilderment.

Both Lena and the robed mage started at her in disbelief.

"What?" The queen spat. "Have you never seen a candy dragon drinking Earl Grey before?"