Chapter 161: Departure I
Zen Focus.
Axel had bought the skill by paying quite a heavy prince. He couldn't help but wonder what was so special about this skill to warrant such a huge price.
But when he went through what he would be able to do once he learnt it, he was surprised.
The information related to the basic training of the skill came into his mind and Axel got to working with the first step.
First step: Peace.
He has to go through all of his worst actions and have peace with them.
After some time.
'Done.'
Axel did this quite easily. Axel stands by everything he has done. His every action, his every mistake, his every sin, he owns up to it.
'Why was it so easy?'
[You are a rare existence in this World. This step proves to be incredibly difficult for most practitioners. Not many have convictions over their actions. Most humans are hypocrites who can't face their real selves.]
'Well, that's good. Because I don't have much time.'
Axel shrugged, moving on to the next step.
Now came the truly difficult step. Connecting with the soul.
Axel went through the instructions. In order to connect with your soul, you need to cast magic and truly locate the origin of that magic. It can be anywhere in the body. The objective is to be able to connect with it in order to proceed further into the skill.
Axel casted a simple spell. The magic appeared on his wand, but he didn't quite feel where it originated from.
He cast magic a second time. This time, he felt it rush from his hand all the way to his wand. Still, no origin. Axel tried a few more times before he was exhausted. Sighing, he got up and went out to find Daphne.
Though he couldn't find her in the living, neither in the kitchen, nor in any other rooms. Axel looked at the only only other room he had left out, which he hadn't even introduced to her.
He sighed. 'Of course she went there.'
Axel found Daphne in his study, where he kept all the important stuff. Daphne was looking at a particular miniature model he had made as a reference for planning the heist.
"I see you found my study," he said, making her jump.
Daphne rounded up on him, looking a bit panicked. "I….I thought it was one of the bedrooms."
Axel nodded, "Well, it's not. Anyways, glad you're no longer angry with me."
?? Daphne suddenly remembered that she was supposed to be angry with him for teasing her mercilessly. She turned her head away. "Hey! I'm still very much angry, alright?"
Axel nodded. "If you say so."
Daphne sighed. She could never stay mad at him. She turned back, returning to observe the model. 'This model… it's the third floor corridor, right?'
Daphne sighed upon seeing him nod as if ask why she is asking that. "You were there, weren't you? You were the one who stole the Philosopher's stone."
Axel shrugged. "I did." He said, expression saying 'big deal'. He didn't think it was a problem if she found out. "I needed it to make the cure."
Daphne rubbed her forehead. "So, it was you." She murmured to herself.
"What's the matter? The stone wasn't even real."
Daphne just shook her head. "Nothing." That day, she had almost lost her life. But 'someone' swooped in and saved her from her. Now she's discovering that even that, was none other than Axel.
She was frustrated. Just what is she supposed to do when she is already in such a huge dept? She's ready to give him her everything but she doesn't seem to have anything he wants or needs.
"Oh, right. Martina called, asking for you. She said you aren't picking up her calls," she said before she leaving.
Axel, who didn't even remember that he had saved her, scratched his head. Is she still mad? He just decided to contact Martina and Akiko. Those two must have been worried about him.
As expected, his magi-mirror was full of calls and messages. Axel just rang Martina, who picked up very quickly.
"It's him! Hello?"
"Axel? Are you alright?"
"Of course I am, didn't Daphne tell you that?" He asked.
"Daphne? Yeah, she said a lot of things." Axel fell like he heard grinding of teeth. Axel wondered just what the hell Daphne said to her.
'Ask him where he is.' He heard Akiko say over the phone.
"He can hear you, Akiko. Anyways, where are you? When are you coming back?" Asked Martina.
"Me? I'm at this secret living space I found in one of the corridors. Can't tell you the location over the call." he casually before taking a more serious tone. "Listen, don't worry about me. I can recover better on my own than under the supervision of the healers. Plus, I'd rather not answer to Dumbledore and professors. So, I'll just stay here and recover. Call me if anything comes up, alright?"
"… Alright." Martina didn't sound too happy for some reason. "Though the situation is getting a bit serious about your disappearance are beginning to wonder what happened. And with no statement from the school, it's only making things worse. Dumbledore is also haunting us for your location."
Axel clicked his tongue, Fame really wasn't a good thing. "Just let Bellatrix handle Dumbledore. As for the restless students, just let them wonder. You know why we can't let other's find out about my status."
Axel decided that it would be best if he remains missing. It will leave throw the Organisation off his trail. Hell, they might even assume he was dead after Theron and Nerio kidnapped him. Even if they think he's alive, they'll at least not focus on Hogwarts after knowing he never returned.
"Alright, I understand," said Martina. "And Axel, sorry about the last time. We shouldn't have tried to stop you."
"It's alright. I should be the one apologizing. It was emergency." Axel didn't really mind that. Martina and Akiko were only trying to help him. He regretting using force on them. It's just that at that moment, he was just too furious since he had know idea what had happened to Daphne and he didn't have the time to explain.
"Are you still going to go?" This time, it was Akiko who asked that.
"…Yes, and I'm not taking you with me."
"I'm going," said Akiko firmly.
"Not happening. To be honest, for a ninja, you aren't all that adept at deception and covert operation. I'll call you if need you."
"…." It seemed like Akiko took some damage from that. But it was true. Akiko is good as fighting, killing, using force, but not at other things like espionage, spying and disguise. She has always been so strong that she has never needed those.
"Um…" began Martina, but,
"Don't even bother asking, Martina. You're too inexperienced for this."
Axel hung up after talking some more. He could understand the girls wanting to come, but Axel decided he'd rather do it alone. Sure, those two are incredibly powerful and would be helpful to have around, but he hasn't forgotten that he is injured in the first place due to protecting them.
Whatever happens in Atlantis, Axel would be much more comfortable if he has to look out only for himself. He has the survivability of an immortal creature, but he can't say the same when having to look out for others.
After a meal, Axel went back to training, having recovered some of his strength. He tried, failed, tried failed, recovered, and then tried again. Connecting with his soul took quite a long time, and the process was complicated. But till the next day, Axel did it. It was a lot like Occlumency, so that also helped him along the way.
But as soon as he did, problems arose only after that. Axel's body jerked violently as he quickly broke the connection.
"What the hell?!"
It really was. Hell. His soul… It was like a purgatory that seeked to destroy his mind as soon as it connected. It was full of pain. And anger. There was so much anger…
'System, what the hell just happened?!'
[Axel, your mind might be at peace with your life, but your soul is not. Mind is something that can be controlled consciously, but the same does not apply for the soul. With such a soul as your medium, you are not able to make the optimal use of your magic. That's why you feel that your magic limit is very low.]
'Damn…' Axel now understood why he was unable to do much magic. His soul has been weakened due to the loss of most of his records. That small purgatory can't process much magic before it reaches its limit.
'Does everyone have a soul similar to mine?'
[Only you do. Due to your extreme experiences in your life. The only reason you were able to so much magic is because you had too many impressive records, strengthening your soul. Now that they are temporarily gone…]
Axel understood. Now that his impressive qualitative and quantitative records are gone, his soul can't bear the burden of magic when it's already in such a state. If Zen Focus can help him solve that, it would enhance his magic greatly.
[That is only one of the benefits of Zen Focus.]
'Yeah, yeah, but how the hell do I even proceed? That thing won't even let me in!' That was the problem. He could see that the skill could be extremely beneficial, but Axel couldn't see himself succeeded.
He knew what he had to do to proceed from the information in head. The next step is to somehow gradually bring tranquillity to his soul and make it as still as a pond at dawn, so that the magic can flow unobstructed through it. It might be easy for others, but Axel couldn't even bring his conscious near it let alone make adjustments.
He was supposed to find an anchor. Something that would pacify his soul, but had no idea what it meant.
[You have to find that on your own]
Of course, the system didn't help out at the crucial moment.
'Sigh…' And thus began Axel's difficult part of recovery. No matter what he tried, he couldn't succeed.
No matter how much he tried, he couldn't influence the turbulence in his soul at all. It was simply not in his control, unlike his mind. Until now, he had always thought that he had put all that suffering past him. That nothing could really affect him as long as he doesn't let it.
But he was wrong. The shitty life he has life, and the pain and suffering has gone through, they're all still with him, in his soul. And it has been affecting him a lot.
[Don't take it too hard on yourself. You can be powerful even without this skill once you regain your overwhelming records. Even the most powerful wizards have bad memoires and regrets. Most of them don't have tranquillity with their soul. But they turn these sufferings into great source of motivation and power.]
'Really?'
[Affirmative. It's just that none of them have suffer quite as much as you at your age. If someone is alive after all you've been through at your age, they'd rather kill themselves.]
The fucking system was NOT helping at all! Axel sat there for he didn't know how long. It wasn't working at him.
While Axel was struggling, his hand was suddenly grabbed between two soft and comparatively small palms. "Are you alright?" A voice asked tentatively.
!!!
The burning purgatory of suffering that had been blocking his consciousness from entering suddenly became much tamer, letting him easily enter. But Axel was just so surprised by this sudden change the connection broke, bringing him back to sitting on the bed.
Axel opened his eyes, stunned. The anchor. He actually found it!
"What happened?!" Asked Daphne, really scared.
Axel fixed Daphne with an intense gaze. "Daphne."
?!
Daphne's heart skipped a beat. Axel had never looked at her like this before. "Wa-Wa-What is it?"
"I need your help," said Axel seriously.
'Help?! With what?!' Daphne's imagination began running wild. "S-Sure. W-Whatever it is…just tell me," she said, looking down as she fidgeted her hands. Holy Morgana, is this a dream?
"I need you to stay with me."
Daphne's heart was pumping so loud that she thought even Axel would hear it. "Stay with you? I-In what way?"
A few minutes later, Daphne found herself sitting in bed, holding Axel's hand while concentrated on what he was doing. And, it seems like they are going to stay like that for a while.
Well, it wasn't what she was expecting. Definitely not.
But…
Daphne smiled. Isn't this great as well? She can look at him as much as she wants. And she's helping him too! Somehow. Something related to soul. Whatever the case, Daphne felt like her soul was quite serene right now.
....
A.N.: Wonder what Daphne said to Martina on call?