Chapter 68: Sort Too Soon
September 4th, 1977
Sunlight flooded through the large windows, bathing the classroom in a warm light. In appreciation of the warm weather, most of her peers had discarded their outer robes, taking a seat in just their blouses and dress shirts, with more buttons opened than some might find appropriate.
"Let's take these few over here." Harry said motioning at a set of benches, before stretching his long legs out as he took a seat.
Lily and James sat down to their left; the remaining Marauders close behind them. Marlene glanced over her shoulder at her peers. The loss of Severus Snape was barely noticeable. Defense was still the largest NEWT class taught at Hogwarts, with the majority of upper-year students from all houses taking it.
"Cooling charms?" She raised an eyebrow at her boyfriend, who had rolled up the sleeves of his shirt.
"Yes please." Harry sighed, moaning in relief when she waved her wand over him from head to toe, murmuring under her breath. "You're so good at that."
"Definitely not the first time she's heard that compliment." Sirius sniggered from behind, earning himself a round of chuckles from anyone within arm's reach.
"You should really be more careful, Black." Marlene said, turning around on the bench, tossing a braid of blonde curls over her shoulder: "I'm also very good with this right here." She twirled her wand between her fingers: "It would be a shame if I had to add a few more bruises to the ones you received when Penelope Jones' father caught you on their balcony last week... Didn't you fall off and have to escape butt naked through their hedges?"
"Wait- I- " Sirius gaped at her while their friends roared in laughter: "How- how do you even know about that."
Before Marlene had to explain that purebloods loved to gossip, the door leading from the teacher's office into the Defense classroom was opened. Professor Meadowes stepped out, wearing a simple set of professional dark robes and a similar hat to the one she wore at the opening feast.
"Good afternoon, class." The witch greeted them enthusiastically, walking over to the blackboard: "As you will have gathered by paying attention when the Headmaster introduced me a few days ago, my name is Dorcas Meadowes. I have British and French origins, but the majority of my life has been spent working at magical universities all around the world, usually studying different aspects of the Dark Arts."
With small flicks of her black wand, the chalk started writing down some of the highlights she just shared by itself.
"For my retirement, I decided to return to England and also grant an old friend a small favor." Meadowes explained with a brief chuckle: "Well, to be completely honest with you, one of the reasons I even accepted this position was to study a magical phenomenon I have so far never encountered before. Let's see if I can solve it within a year's time."
"You're only staying for a year, ma'am?" One of the Hufflepuffs asked.
"That will fully depend on how successful my own study is." She answered with a shrug: "I might not have much of a choice in the matter and I'd rather not trigger any malicious consequences..."
Marlene exchanged a quick glance with Harry, aware that they were likely thinking the same. Yet it didn't seem like anyone else in the class had caught on yet; pretty much all of them showed great signs of confusion.
"Anyways, enough with the riddles." The professor continued: "As far as I've been told, this is quite a large class, partly due to the fact that many students in your year managed to score satisfactory OWLs in your examinations. You must have had a good teacher in your fifth year?"
A few people nodded in agreement. Even Marlene couldn't deny that Munrose had been a strong instructor.
"Remember our little duel?" Harry whispered into her ear, making her skin tingle: "You looked so cute back then, getting all worked up and angry with me... like a golden ball of fire..."
"You kept teasing and playing with me." Marlene scowled: "You know I don't like it when you tease me too much..."
"Just the right amount then, next time." Harry smirked.
" -however, just because you did well on your OWLs doesn't mean you should expect equally satisfying results in your NEWTs. The required demonstration of skill will be much higher." Meadowes explained, her blue eyes roaming from one student to the next: "Therefore, I'd like to get a better overview of where this class currently stands."
With a flick of her wand, a stack of parchments started levitating out of her back, before they flew towards the benches, leaving one copy in front of each student.
"Please, do not fret, this test will not be graded. It simply serves to evaluate the status quo." Meadowes explained when the first student started groaning at being handed a test in their first lesson: "You have fifteen minutes to demonstrate what you know so far, which means I don't want to see any collaboration. You may begin now!"
Marlene calmly took out her quill and a bottle of ink. Next to her, Lily was already filling out the first question, much to the amusement of her boyfriend. The blonde lowered her head and began reading:
Name four spells or charms that can be used to incapacitate an opponent (Include incantations)
Briefly explain the theory behind the shield charm and how it's used to maximum effectiveness.
Name three ways to protect yourself against spells that produce area damage
The list continued like that for a few more questions. Harry let out a tiny snort, barely silent enough not to be caught by their professor.
"Best of luck then." He whispered sarcastically before he started writing himself. With a low chuckle, Marlene focused on her first question and scribbled away.
"Alright, quills down please, let me collect your papers!" Fifteen minutes later Meadowes' sharp voice tore through the silence in the classroom. The older witch flicked her wand and levitated the papers, one row after the other. "Alright, thank you very much. I will take a look at a few of your tests before our next class to get an understanding of where you stand theory-wise. Now let's talk about practical applications."
A murmur of excitement spread from bench to bench; students blinked up in surprise.
"Not to worry, it will be in a controlled environment." Twisting her wand around, Professor Meadowes summoned a training dummy from her office and placed it in front of the blackboard: "I will now randomly pick students and give them specific scenarios, where a spell or combination of spells ensure they suffer no bodily harm. I'd like you to demonstrate said spells on this dummy."
Many students started nodding eagerly. After the lackluster classes from last year, where active casting had been all but forbidden, most seventh years yearned for some action.
"Be advised, I will not tolerate anyone deviating from my instructions." Their teacher warned: "If I see someone casting spells at anything but the training dummy, you will find yourself in serious trouble. Don't test me!"
She waited for a few moments, letting her eyes roam over the class: "Very well then. Mr. Potter, how about we start with you? I'd like you to demonstrate how to combat a boggart most effectively."
"The boggart banishing spell will be the best." James stood from his chair and pulled his wand from within his sleeve: "The movement is like this- " He aimed at the dummy:
"Riddikulus!"
A faint ripple of magic surged through the room and impacted the dummy's chest, causing it to stagger backward by a few inches.
"Well done, Mr. Potter, take one point to Gryffindor!" Meadowes nodded appreciatively: "Ms. Rosier, if you would stun the dummy for me, please?"
The dirty blonde Slytherin girl stood up from the part of the classroom her housemates had occupied. She dutifully fired a bright red stunner, hitting the dummy on the shoulder, but still earned a point for her House.
The pressor continued with the exercise picking seemingly random people. Florence was asked to act like the dummy was a grindylow. She showed the correct way of defending herself against a possible attack by targeting her fictional opponent's weak fingers with banishing and cutting charms.
"Mr. Peverell..." Meadowes finally arrived at their bench after a few more turns, a curious gleam in her blue eyes: "I'd like you to demonstrate how to defend yourself against an Inferi. What spells would you use?"
"Any fire spell will do, ma'am..." The length of the pale Elder Wand lazily slipped into her boyfriend's palm, where he spun it between his finger while standing up:
"Incendio."
Small yelps and gasps echoed through the classroom; a few students cried in surprise. Heat seared past Marlene's face when a compressed flame erupted from Harry's wand. She edged back in her seat despite knowing that Harry was still holding back and would never expose her to any risks.
When she blinked away the bright spots in her vision, she saw that his spell had burned a fist-sized hole through the dummy's chest, leaving it scorched.
"Why fire, Mr. Peverell?" Meadowes eyed him somewhat warily.
"Most spells capable of incapacitating a human show no effect on Inferi. Magic keeps them animated like a puppet to do your opponent's bidding, giving them far greater physical endurance than naturally possible. They don't tire out and they also don't know defeat." Harry shrugged as he took a seat: "If they don't have blood to spill and if a broken bone merely slows them down momentarily, then one has to damage them beyond magical repair. Fire will do the job..."
The entire class stared at Harry nervously. His knowledge of Inferi made it almost sound like he encountered them before.
'And he had.'
"A very detailed answer, I could hardly have put it better myself." The professor nodded slowly: "Take 10 points for Gryffindor."
Her thoughts drifted off as the professor continued talking. Flashes of a crimson storm of fire in a bottomless, black cave played in her mind. Pale, bony fingers broke the surface of a lake, reaching for her, pulling her down into a cold wet grave.
" -Ms. McKinnon, how about you?"
"Pardon me, Professor?" Marlene was startled from her thoughts. Fixing her posture and tossing her braid over one shoulder she met Meadowes' expectant gaze.
"I was saying that we have time for one last demonstration, my dear." The witch repeated: "How would you defend yourself if you were attacked by a dementor?"
"They say that the Patronus charm is the best defense," Marlene replied neutrally: "It repels a dementor and acts as a shield."
"Oh, do they say so?" Meadowes chuckled in amusement: "There's no need to hold back now, Ms. McKinnon. If you can demonstrate the charm in the Headmaster's office surrounded by staff then you might as well do it in a classroom for educational purposes, don't you think?"
Excited whispers broke out behind her.
"Ridiculous..." Someone huffed from the corner the Slytherins sat in: "No student could do that, let alone her."
"But Montague swore that he saw her do it last year!"
"It's supposed to be a large horse, he said..."
"Silence!" The professor's sharp voice tore through the room: "Well then, we're waiting, my dear..."
Gritting her teeth for a few seconds, Marlene decided to pull through with it. Not to demonstrate her superiority in front of her classroom, but to ensure she and the professor won't have a fallout in the very first lesson already. NEWTs were still of importance to her.
Pursing her lips, Marlene snatched her wand from her waist, enjoying the small warm thrill that was sent up her arm upon contact. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She didn't need to turn to Harry to picture him in her mind, feel his hands on her, hear his loving whispers in her ears, or listen to his promises of the future they had together.
'Harry is always with me.'
A bright warmth spread from her chest and raced down her arm to the fingers holding her wand:
"Expecto Patronum."
A blinding light seared her eyes through closed lids. She opened them to see her ethereal guardian burst from the tip of her wand, floating towards the blackboard while spreading its beautiful wings and throwing its head back.
Her peers either gasped in a mixture of surprise and disbelief or cheered her on with applause, many of them had vacated their seats to come edge closer to the magnificent granian.
While everyone marveled at the Patronus, Marlene's eyes were trained on their instructor, who studied the ethereal avatar curiously from its wings to the set of hooves. She didn't miss the quick glance the professor shot towards Harry sitting next to her, where her eyes lingered on the golden ring on his finger for a few seconds before they dipped to Marlene's wand.
'Damn it!' She quickly reattached it to the holster on her waist.
"Very well done, Ms. McKinnon, that will do for a demonstration. Take 20 well-deserved points for Ravenclaw." Meadowes nodded satisfactorily: "I'm looking forward to having you help me instruct this class when we study the Patronus towards the end of term. And I'm also sure you'll have the most fascinating story to tell regarding the unique form it just took..."
September 11th, 1977
He spun his wand through the air, leaving a sparkling ripple of magic that twisted into a layer of gold. It flowed like liquid honey, seamlessly attaching itself to the ring of silver that was already hovering a few inches above his open palm.
He studied his work critically before glancing up to see the Marauders sitting around the Map in the middle of the Gryffindor seventh-year Dormitory: "How far are they already?"
"They just reached the grounds," Peter reported nervously.
"Merlin, you're almost wetting yourself again, Wormy." Sirius chuckled: "One would think that for how often you've done this with us that you'd be less scared."
"It's always dangerous..." Peter murmured, biting on the nail of his thumb: "And risky..."
"Don't listen to Wormtail, Harry, it will be fine, especially now since we have you in the air." James said: "But you might want to put aside that pretty ring and get ready."
"A ring?" Sirius' head snapped up from: "Does McKinnon have you so whipped already that you're seriously considering marriage?"
"It's not a ring, you blind old dog, I was just practicing some magic." Harry brushed it off and jumped off the bed, flicking his wand to summon a pair of boots.
Sirius smirked: "I never thought you'd be the first to get married off, it was always Prongs that is completely smitten with his girl." He shrugged as he pulled on a shirt: "Well, I know where to find some muggle strippers and they'll hardly care whose stag party they show up to..."
'I doubt Marlene would find any amusement in that.' Harry cringed: 'In fact, I can't think of a worse way to ruin a honeymoon...'
"If you think for even a second that Marlene or Lily are the types of witches to allow strippers on their fiancés' stag parties then you're even dumber than I thought, Padfoot." James shook his head while laughing. He picked up the map from the floor: "Mischief managed."
After pocketing it Harry's father flicked his wand, drawing a set of purple numbers in the air: "Anyways, it's almost 11:30 pm. Moony and Pomfrey just arrived in the shack, we should get going."
They followed James out of the dorm back into the Gryffindor common room. A few coals in the larger fireplace were still smoldering, casting long shadows on a lonely figure sitting in one of the pushy armchairs.
"Late night trip, James?" Harry's mother looked up from the stack of parchment she had on her lap. Standing up, she walked over to them, meeting them in front of the portrait hole where she eyed them suspiciously before the tension eventually left her face and her green orbs softened: "It's that time again, isn't it?"
James nodded: "We'll be back in the early morning."
"Good luck." Lily swallowed heavily, taking him into a fierce hug before dislodging herself: "And please be careful."
"Can I get a hug too, red?" Sirius waggled his eyebrows at her, dodging James' attempt to slap him over the head.
"Not tonight, Sirius, sorry." Lily rolled her eyes, a small smile tugging on her lips. "Now, get moving already."
"At what point did you tell her what you do on the full moons?" Harry asked curiously after they carefully closed the portrait of the Fat Lady, stepping out onto the seventh floor.
"Quite early actually." James checked if the air was clean before motioning them to follow him towards the staircase: "I was so glad that she finally gave me a chance that I didn't want to butcher things by keeping unnecessary secrets from her. Besides, Lily is too smart not to find out eventually..."
'He was smarter than I was.'
"She does look quite hot whenever she's all worked up though." Sirius barked: "You know what I mean, don't you? It's whenever her eyes start sparkling... A real fiery ginger, that one."
"Please, just shut up, Padfoot." James groaned, holding out a hand to gesture for them to wait while they let an entire group of ghosts pass by.
"This will take forever; I have a better idea," Harry murmured. He let the Elder Wand glide into his palm, tapping each of their heads. Shivers of magic ran down the Marauders' bodies like pearls of water before they became almost fully transparent.
"We should've spent our time learning something useful like the disillusionment charm instead of all the prank spells we never ended up using anyways," James murmured appreciatively, waving his limpid hand in front of his face.
"You wound me, Prongs." Sirius sighed: "Just because you've been promoted to head tosser doesn't mean we won't get our chance to use those spells. Perhaps we'll even test them on you now."
They sneaked through the dimly lit corridor in silence until they reached the giant staircase. From there it was all the way down to the ground floor and then towards the courtyard.
Not a single cloud attempted to hide the moon tonight. It stood proudly far up in the dark night sky, illuminating the grounds of the castle and giving them a clear sight of their next destination.
The thick, dark branches and twigs of the Whomping Willow shifted in a gentle breeze. A dim shadow rose from its roots, glanced over its shoulder, and hurried across the lawn back up to the castle.
None of the boys dared to breathe as Madam Pomfrey approached them, carrying a cloak and a familiar wand in her outstretched hand. Harry caught a glimpse of her worried face, marred by deep wrinkles before she passed the stone pillars they were hiding behind and entered the castle.
Harry glanced at his muggle wristwatch, frowning when he caught the clock's hand moving dangerously close to the number at the top. "We have to get moving," He whispered as soon as the giant oak doors closed with a heavy thud.
"Finite Incantatem." Each of the young wizards canceled the disillusionment charm Harry had applied and hurried down towards the willow, which by now had stopped swaying in the gentle breeze, looking as dangerous and threatening as ever.
"Alright, Wormy, get ready. You're up now," Sirius grinned, pointing at the roots of the tree.
Peter shivered and gave a small, unconvinced nod before he transformed on the spot, shrinking down in a whirlwind of brown and gray. The rat squeaked twice and dashed forwards, leaving a trail of parting grass that revealed the path it took.
The monstrous willow didn't notice the small invader until too late to react. Peter escaped into the shadow of the Whomping Willow. Its branches were creaking as though in a high wind, whipping backward and forward yet they failed to connect with the small target.
Peter placed a paw on the small knot near the base. He pressed against it with all his weight, standing on his rear legs until the knot gave in, causing the tree to become immobilized.
"Let's go." James urged and hurried across the lawn.
They covered the distance to the trunk in seconds and reached the gap in the roots. Having used the tunnel before, Harry went first; he crawled forward, headfirst, and slid down an earthy slope to the bottom of a very low tunnel. Seconds later, James and Sirius slithered down beside him.
"Lumos!" Harry whispered and flicked the Elder Wand down the length tunnel.
An orb of bright light burst from the wooden tip and raced down the darkness, briefly illuminating the face of Wormtail who was waiting for them.
"Quick," Sirius fell into a light jog, following the light like a moth in the darkness.
Harry and James easily followed, with only Wormtail's breath becoming more ragged as the slope increased, announcing their imminent arrival. Finally the tunnel twisted and Harry could see a patch of dim moonlight through the small opening on top. They pulled themselves out of the hole, giving a struggling Peter a hand. Harry glanced around, taking in the disordered, dusty room.
Paper was peeling from the walls; there were stains all over the floor; every piece of furniture was broken as though somebody had smashed it. Just as he remembered, the windows were all boarded up.
"You came..."
Harry turned towards the corner the voice came from, his eyes roaming over the pale form of Remus Lupin in a long, white hospital gown.
"Of course we came, Moony." James crouched down beside him and patted his shoulder: "No matter how many times you'll tell us that we shouldn't do it, we'll always be here for you."
"You- you should change now..." The moonlight sparkled in Remus' ires, showing they had slowly changed. The veins along his forearm became more prominent. He clenched his jaw, grimacing in pain: "Please- change!"
A high frightened squeaking noise escaped Peter's throat and the next moment the soft taps of his paws could be heard on the old wooden floorboard. The rat ran into the corner furthest away from them.
Harry pictured a long back feather and twisted on the spot, grimacing in slight discomfort as the world around him began to grow while he shrank down. He jumped over the broken furniture and took to the air, landing on the sturdy antlers of the magnificent stag that stood where his father had been a few moments ago.
Relief flickered through Remus' eyes for a split second before yellow invaded them. Then his limbs began to shake while he cried in pain. Harry had known that the transformation was painful, yet watching it only reaffirmed his suspicion.
There was a terrible snarling noise. Remus' head was lengthening. So was his body, ripping the white hospital gown into patches that dropped down onto the floor. His shoulders were hunched and hair was sprouting visibly on his face and hands, which were steadily curling into clawed paws.
The werewolf slowly raised itself to full height, its furry ears almost touching the ceiling. A predatory pair of yellow eyes focused on them. The wild beast flashed them a set of sharp teeth and released a deep howl while it threw its head backward.
Harry quickly fought down the raven's survival instincts. He did not take to the air and fled and instead remained on Prong's antlers, flapping his wings to keep his balance when the stag suddenly moved forward.
Next to him, the enormous, bearlike dog bounded forward as well, barking threateningly at the werewolf, who eyed the two massive animals cautiously, undecided whether to attack or not. Prongs and Padfoot moved in on the beast, pushing him into a corner in an act of dominance, while Wormtail hid underneath a shelf, and Harry crowed in support, puffing out his feathery chest.
The growling werewolves seemed to realize that he was outnumbered and eventually gave in, remaining in the corner with his tail between his legs. Some of the hatred and rage left his burning yellow eyes, instead, he almost seemed to welcome his newfound company.
Padfoot slowly padded forward, guarded by Prongs' antlers, keeping his eyes trained on the werewolf's claws. Two furry snouts, one black and one gray, closed in ever so slightly until Padfoot barked triumphantly and licked the other four-legged animal's face, wagging his tail.
Harry let out a crow of relief but kept his distance a bit longer, just as Wormtail did. Prongs and Padfoot were now gently playing with Moony, who showed less and less resemblance to the beast that had hunted Harry and Hermione through the forbidden in his third year. Still, every so often the werewolf's yellow eyes found Harry, seemingly aware that the large black bird was a foreigner in this familiar round.
After perhaps half an hour of playing, Padfoot paddled out of the room into the hallway. Harry jumped off the top of the shelf he sat on, flying to the wooden cupboard, as he followed him with quick hops. The giant black dog had reached the door to the Shrieking Shack. Standing on his rear legs, he used both his paws to push aside a heavy wooden beam that was blocking their way out.
Padfoot finally managed to do so. After several failed attempts to push down the handle the door creaked open, allowing faint beams of moonlight and gushes of chilly night air to flood the dark, dusty hallway.
Harry immediately jumped over the threshold and took to the sky, relieved to finally stretch his wings and glide through the cool summer night underneath the moonlight. Just as they agreed, he flew a few circles over the perimeter, watching out for anything suspicious with the raven's sharp eyes. When he was certain that everything was clear, his crow echoed three times through the night. Then he flew back down to the Shrieking Shack.
Wormtail darted out of the door; the rat was but a tiny shadow on the dark lawn. Next, the werewolf, surrounded by Prongs and Padfoot, was slowly guided out of the shack. They allowed him a few seconds to rise to his impressive full height and howl at the bright full moon before pushing him towards the edge of the Forbidden Forest.
Whatever bestial tendencies had remained in Moony during his playtime in the Shack, they now fell off and vanished altogether. The large werewolf started sprinting into the dark forest in child-like excitement, hunting a lonely butterfly, scratching his fangs on the bark of a tree, and even chasing its own tail in playful circles.
Harry waited until Wormtail cautiously trailed in the woods before he joined the four friends, darting through the thick crown and branches of the Forbidden Forest to fly impish loops over the heads of the Marauders. The werewolf tried to snap at him a few times, before not letting it bother him too much and eventually accepting the black bird's presence.
Harry glided through the air right above their heads as they all raced through the forest, dodging thick trunks, and branches alike, while Wormtail did his best to keep up with the group. They allowed the werewolf to tire himself out completely, keeping him occupied until his breath became ragged and he was drained of any energy.
Harry darted upwards through the crown of trees until he broke through and flew underneath the bright moon and sparkling stars again. Spotting the Castle in the distance to his left, he dropped back low, memorizing the general direction for the others to guide them.
He found the Marauders in a small clearing, resting against the thick trunk of an oak. Padfoot and Moony were both panting heavily, each sticking out their tongue to ease their breathing. Harry landed on Prongs' majestic antlers and crowed at them, wrenching his feathered head and black beak towards the direction they needed to head back to soon.
The group slowly trotted back, still playfully chasing each other but too exhausted to run too far off track. Moony dutifully obeyed when Prongs and Padfoot surrounded him again and gently drove him towards the Shack across the lawn from the forest's edge.
After howling at the moon one last time, Moony stumbled through the entrance and back into the very room he had transformed in before. Once there, he simply searched for the most comfortable spot on the floor to rest at.
Harry watched from his trusted position up on the shelf as all four Marauders, even Wormtail, closed up and cuddled together.
Something strange stirred inside him, watching them all so peaceful like that. If he weren't from the future and didn't know what was inevitable to happen, then he would surely laugh at anyone suggesting that this group of friends could ever fall apart.
The raven's sharp eyes roamed over the brown little form of Wormtail, who snuggled against Prongs' smooth side. How many nights had they spent together like this already?
'How many more would it have taken for the rat not to betray them?'
He glanced over to Moony, whose heavy eyelids were slowly shutting down, burying the yellow orbs underneath them.
Harry's father and Sirius had risked their lives countless times to comfort Remus Lupin during these hours and make the gruesome transformation as bearable as possible. Sure, Remus' childhood was far from perfect, and still, something told Harry that spending one night a month in pain but surrounded by friends was far better than spending every night for ten long years in a small, dark cupboard under the stairs.
'How many more nights would it have taken for the man to search out the surviving son of his best friend and ensure he was safe and well cared for?'
'And where was Remus after that, when Harry went to Hogwarts?'
The truth was that the man could have easily reached out to him, but he never did so...
'How many more nights together would it have taken for Remus Lupin to be there for Harry when he was entered into a lethal tournament against his will?'
'Where was Remus when Sirius, the only real family Harry had left, died?'
A low crow that almost sounded like a snort left Harry's black beak. If one stopped to think about it, the only time Remus Lupin showed any desire to be there for Harry, was when the man was running from his own responsibilities.
'Running to leave behind a wife and unborn son.'
Harry knew that the lines were getting blurry soon and that it was somewhat absurd to hold grudges for events that had not even taken place.
'However, was it really that absurd to hold a grudge and be cautious when one knew fully well how a person will react once said events take place?'
Dumbledore's words echoed through Harry's head while he took to the air one last time and flew over to rest on Prong's antlers, burying his head underneath a large, black-feathered wing.
"You know, I sometimes think we Sort too soon."
The words had been meant for Severus Snape, and still, Harry couldn't help but feel they applied to more people he had ever gotten to know.
'Including Peter Pettigrew.'
'And Remus Lupin.'