Help?! My Harem is Trying to Kill Me!

 

Huh??? 

I found a pitch black room, neither hot nor cold. I felt as if.. I was floating? How? I don’t know. I tried to look around, but for whatever reason I couldn’t move. 

Where am I????

I was just sitting in my chair playing my favorite H game and now this?! 

I began to try and understand my current predicament. Drawing many theories until I found one that made sense. 

I’m dreaming! Duh?! 

This must be one of those lucid dreams where you’re aware that you’re dreaming. 

Well… if that’s the case. 

I tried imagining myself placed inside of the various amounts of H games that I possessed.  But, alas, nothing.  

I guess it’s not one of those lucid dreams… 

Well, this sucks. 

I quickly began to grow bored of waiting in darkness so I decided to go to sleep.

Wait, can you go to sleep in a dream? Would that push you into another dream?

While I was pondering many things, a bright light clouded my vision. 

Arggg! Someone turn that off! It’s too damn bright!

After a short amount of time a femine and surreal voice echoed inside of my head. 

“Welcome, mortal. You have been chosen by the council of Gods.” 

After my vision cleared, I looked up to see a stunningly beautiful woman floating in front of me. 

Her hair was long and flowing. Her eyes sparkled like diamonds. And her figure was one that could only be found in the most erotic ero game. Voluptuous was a complete understatement! But, what really stood out to me was her pink hair and rainbow colored eyes.

Man, I would simp for her so bad!!!

“Um.. excuse me?” The woman’s voice broke me from my stupor and I began to pay attention . 

Hopefully she didn’t notice me perving out for her. 

“Um.. I did.” The woman’s face turned bashful as she knitted her fingers. 

…Huh? What?! Did I say that?! 

“No.. it’s just that I can hear you..” The woman seemed to be embarrassed and she averted her gaze.  

“You heard me?”

I’m quite sure I clearly thought that! How does she know that?! 

I’m done with this dream, it’s getting weird! End it! End it right now! 

“This is not a dream, mortal.” The woman said with a less reserved tone. “My name is Lilia, and I am one of the servants of the council of God’s and you have been chosen to receive one wish from the council.” 

What?! This doesn’t even make any sense! Just let me wake up already!

“Why are you mortals always so..” Lilia sighed loudly before she resumed speaking. “My duty isn’t to convince you.” 

Lilia spread her arms apart and the bright light returned. 

Damnit! 

I tried to close my eyes, but it was useless. The light was bright as before, but this time it didn’t hurt. It was actually pleasant. 

Huh? 

“Mortal, it is time to choose. You can wish for anything that you would like. Just name it, and the council of God’s shall provide it.” 

I gave up on trying to understand this strange dream. And decided to play along. 

“Anything…” My lips curled into a vulgar smile. I couldn’t feel it physically, but I could feel it mentally.    

Lilia’s eyes filled with tears and widened into horror, while her lips trembled nonstop. “Please, no?” 

Hey! I’m not that bad! It was a joke! A joke! 

“No you weren’t!” Lilia’s eyes were filled with tears and her hands trembled as she balled them into fist. “This is not a dream! You have died, and your soul is in limbo!” 

“Died??” There’s no way that this is real.

I tried to pinch my cheeks, but for some reason I couldn’t. 

“You were playing a strange game and.. “Lilia’s voice trailed off and her cheeks turned bright red. “You were about to do strange things to yourself..”

This is real.. I actually died.. Oh my God… 

“Yes!” Lilia exclaimed in pure jubilation! 

Hey! Why are you so happy about this?! This isn’t a good thing! I had a life! 

Lilia looked to be embarrassed and quickly averted her gaze. 

I mentally sighed before beginning to speak. “But why did I die?! And why was I chosen?!” 

Lilia shrugged her shoulders. "I am not involved in the decision making process for the chosen."Lilia spoke matter of factly. “But, once you clicked the option, you accepted the gift from the council of the Gods.”

“But, there was no script! How the hell was I supposed to know?! And why would I need to die in order to accept this gift?!” 

“Oh, you died naturally.” Lilia said that, as if she was surprised that I didn’t know that. “You died from the sugary beverages and greasy foods that you were so fond of.”

I got taken out by energy drinks and fried chicken… 

“Fortunately you clicked the option before you had passed. If not, you would have been on your way to the afterlife.” Lilia said so with a slight smile on her lips. 

I don’t know if I should laugh or cry.... “Can I have a minute?” 

Lilia nodded her head and turned her back, revealing her well developed rear.

“Hey!” Lilia exclaimed.

Oh, right she can hear what I’m thinking. “Sorry!” 

Lila humphed before folding her arms. 

Various thoughts flooded my mind. Like how my dad and mom are taking my death, and hoping that my computer miraculously exploded so they would never discover what was on it.

I shivered at the thought of them discovering me in such a pitiful state. 

With all things being considered, this is a pretty good predicament that I found myself in.. If I can really wish for anything that I want… “I’m ready!”

“Great!” Lilia screamed as she spun back around. “You can have anything that you desire! You could be the strongest man alive! The king of your land! Immortal! Or wield powers beyond anything you could have ever imagined! The possibilities-” 

“Reincarnate me as a Harem Protagonist in an H game!” That was one thing that I truly desired more than anything! 

“Are...endless?” Lilia's words trailed off as her mouth slowly fell. “I...you...wha...uh..e-e-e-eeehhh????” 

Lila froze with her mouth hung open, while staring at me silently. 

“What’s the hold up?” 

“Why would…” Lilia muttered. “Are you certain?” 

“Completely.” I answered honestly and matter of factly. 

Lilia blinked a few times before she opened her mouth. “Are you stupid?” 

“Excuse me?!” That was extremely rude! 

“I’m sorry..” Lilia’s mouth opened and closed like a broken lid. “I just don’t understand..” 

“I don’t care if you don’t understand! It’s my wish! Do your job and grant it!” 

“Are you sure?” Lilia asked one more time, as if she hoped that I would change my mind this time. 

“I am absolutely positively certain on levels that you could not begin to fathom! I have wanted nothing more since I was 10!”

“I…” Lilia was speechless and continued staring at me before sighing loudly. “If that is your wish..” 

Big anime tiddies, here I come! 

As Lilia granted his wish, she sighed to herself. Thinking, ‘Please don’t ever let me encounter that man ever again.’