Half-blood Prince’s tale (A hp fic)

 

The next time I opened my eyes, I was greeted by the sight of a familiar ceiling. I sensed a presence next to me and indeed Eileen had pulled a chair out and was sitting beside me.

 

As soon her eyes landed on me, she leapt at me. 

 

“Severus, you are awake!” 

 

A pair of arms grabbed me and I was pulled into a hug. I awkwardly hugged back. 

 

“How are you feeling, Severus?” she asked with a look of concern in her eyes. 

 

“I am fine, just a bit hungry,” I answered as I observed her. I noticed that she had changed. Not physically but more so the way she carried herself.

 

There was a certain grace to her actions now and her face still remained stoic but it gave off a calm, collected vibe rather than the depressed one.

 

“So what happened?” I finally asked.

 

“I-I am so sorry Severus for being such a bad mother to you. I was too weak to fight against that man and you had to suffer for it. I should have known that taking those vows was a bad decision, they forced me to have some lingering feelings for that monster and I couldn’t harm him even if I wanted to.”

 

Huh...so my guess had been right. I decided then to always make sure I don’t promise anything carelessly. One wrong vow could potentially fuck me over.

 

“It's alright mother, you couldn't have known. Besides, my actions did save you so I am happy with it.” I said trying to reassure her.

 

“But...you shouldn’t have been forced to take such an action in the first place…To kill at such a young age...”

 

“I would do it again if I had to free you from that man. I do not regret killing him.”

 

“I see..” a sad smile forms on her face. “How...d-did you feel now? Mentally I mean..”

 

Hmm…it was a good question. How did I feel? I had just killed a man after all. I thought about it and oddly I didn’t feel much. I didn’t feel any guilt or horror for having taken a life.

 

Was I a bad person for not feeling anything? If so I was fine with it. I never claimed to be a good guy so it didn’t matter. Heck, I felt killing Tobias was letting him off easy for the abuse he did to Eileen and Severus.

 

But I guess this was an alright outcome as well. I don’t think Eileen would have liked seeing her son torture a person.

 

The only thing I felt was a bit of anxiety. I was not worried about the kill per say but more so the consequences that came after carrying it out.

 

“Not really, I just feel a bit squeamish I guess? I don’t remember it that well” I said, putting on a confused expression. Better to act clueless than act like I didn’t feel anything.

 

“Oh...It must have been a harrowing experience then. I won’t pretend to understand how it must have felt for you but I am your mother so you can always come to me if you feel troubled.” 

 

“Thank you mother, I will be sure to keep that in mind.So….what did you do with the body?” 

 

“Well, I can use magic like before so I just made him disappear.” She answered, her tone taking a happier note at the mention of magic.

 

 Another theory of mine seemed to have been true as her magic returned after Tobias the oppressive force keeping her was removed.

 

“Oh...so can you teach me magic again then?” I asked. 

 

“Yes I can but you still don’t have a wand so you can’t use any complex magic but we can get you started on potions. You will need a wand for that too but you would have pretty much learnt the entire recipe except the wand part.”

 

“I am fine with that too but won’t making potions require ingredients?”

 

“Of course we need ingredients but for that we need money. I will go reclaim what little if left of my family’s fortune and then think of a way to earn money but you don’t worry, your mother will be the one to take care of you now.”

 

Seeing her confidence was a pleasant surprise. The change was sudden and much faster than I had expected.

 

“Alright, I will leave that to you then.” I said getting out of my bed. 

 

“So are you going to only teach me potions?” 

 

“Well yes…” she began. “Oh...how could I forget, I was planning on teaching you occlumency which is the art of defending your mind from external attacks but…I am rubbish at it. Even I know only the bare basics so there’s not much I can teach you.”

 

“I learnt it from my mother who was quite skilled at it but alas I never paid much attention to her and always looked for excuses to get away from the lessons. Still in the end, I did learn a few things….”

 

“So...how do I learn it then?” I asked feeling disappointed. I guess it made sense since if she was good at occlumency and legilimency, she would have seen through Tobias easily and would have never ended up like this.

“Well there is not much we can do right now but I could teach you what little I remember. Just some basic exercises for the mind, I know a bit of legilimency, just about enough to read surface thoughts so I could try that on you. How does that sound?”

 

“I...am fine with it. I suppose I can always learn it when I am older…or are there any books from which I can learn?” I said.

 

“Hmm...there are a few books on this but they are rather hard to find and at our current state, we can’t afford one….” she replied and looked down with a frown.

 

“Its alright...I will focus on other things for now. You can just teach me what you know.”

 

Eileen nodded and patted my head.

 

“So.. do we start now?” I asked with anticipation.

 

“Nope~ not today young man, when was the last time you rested? Look at you, you seem tired. So no magic today for you. Just stay in bed and your mother will tend to you.”

 

I wanted to protest but seeing her determined gaze, I backed away. It was not like not doing magic for one day would harm me. The only reason I wanted to try it was because it still had some novelty and I just wanted to see what I could do.

 

I let out a sigh and leaned against the bedpost. “Alright..alright, have it your way. I will rest for...today but you can’t expect me to stay in bed all day.”

 

Her gaze softened, “Hm...well it can’t be helped then. You can just watch me renovate this hovel of a house and then we can go out and do some shopping. How does that sound?”

 

“Wait...you are renovating the house? Are we gonna live here? Also aren’t we a bit tight in the finances?”

 

“No..I am just renovating the house to sell it. I doubt we would get much out of it as its more of the location than the condition of the house. Nobody wants to live in this dreadful town but the condition might convince some poor chap moving in here.”

 

“Now as for where we are gonna live, I want to move to the magical side again...if that's not an issue with you?” She asked with some nervousness in her eyes.

 

“Go on...I have no problem with living with magic.”

 

“Of course, you would see it that way.” She rolled her eyes and continued, “ Well there is a problem though, I have to see how quickly I can get the Prince name back. I am sure my parents didn’t remove me from the family tree considering I was the only child they had. I was a…. terrible daughter but they might have hoped my offspring would inherit the family.”

 

She had a melancholic look on her face as she spoke about her parents. She sighed, “When I get back my family name, I can access the vaults and if there is enough money left in it, I plan on opening up a potion shop and selling potions.”

 

“We could move in now but moving in as a pureblood gives you way more benefits and leeway than a muggleborn would get. Besides we are too broke to live there anyway…”

 

It was a lot to take in as I slowly digested what she said. I felt like a burden was taken off my back. I felt relieved to see that she had made plans to sustain us and it was well thought out too.

 

“Oh...and as for the money part. I had been secretly saving some. It's not much but we can have fun with it for a day at the very least.”

 

“I see...you seem to have thought of everything then. I am glad you are doing well now mother.”

 

“Its all thanks to my lovely son~ “ She smiled at me.

 

“I still feel guilty for making your childhood horrible…... You were forced to mature because of your weak, incompetent mother and I know it seems selfish of me but I beg you to give me another chance to set things right.”

 

“I haven’t been a good mother till now but I swear I will be one now. Please let me make up for all those years of suffering you went through...please give me another chance to be your mother.” She confessed and awaited my judgment. Tears were about to erupt from her eyes and her eyes had a tiny flicker of hope.

 

I sighed internally as I thought of an answer. First of all, I was not her son Severus and had not suffered like he did. I had suffered too but it was a completely different matter. Next, I didn’t know what Severus would have done if he were faced with this.

 

I took a breath and cleared my mind. As my mind cleared, I made up my mind. Sure I was not her son but I was the one who freed her. Also, I didn’t need to care about what Severus would have done, I was not him and I was the one with his body. He was gone now and I had free will.

 

Having made up my mind, I uttered, “Okay.”

 

Just one word but it seemed to have done the trick as her arms wrapped around me and this time I hugged properly. She sobbed into my shoulders as I held her.

 

I had cleared the obstacle that stood in my path and now I could start walking the steps to my dream. I might fail to reach it, I might succeed but one thing was sure, I would walk my path with no regrets.