(Vol 5) Chapter 50: Calm, Cool, and Collected
The Cat Sith floating before Sammy gazed at her calmly. “Madam, if you would please refrain from rushing off to chew him out, I’d appreciate it. My consultation on this matter is not yet to my satisfaction.”
“I bet it isn’t, lawyer-cat! What am I supposed to do with that, huh? I’m not even going to suggest that to Red. I feel like… I feel like she’d do just about anything I ask that doesn’t involve burning trees or something.”
Sancus did not seem perturbed or offended by even one lick. But he did give one lick to his paw to smooth his top hair out. Somehow, it seemed to be done with great patience. “Before I say anything else, I am simply going to preach for a calm, cool, and collected attitude and demeanor in all dealings with Zadkiel, Madam. You’re dealing with a contract, and you want to be done with it, but don’t show it. Show whatever you want to show and be strategic.”
Sammy scoffed. “Easy for you to say, lawyer-cat! I designed you with those traits. Me? I am made of the fucking opposite!”
The Cat Sith just stared back at her, unperturbed. An unperturbed little feline in a suit and glasses.
Finally, Sammy sighed. “You’re impossible to even be angry at, you know. Too cute.”
“I do know, yes. Part of my strategy, which I execute to purr-fection.”
“D’aww! I want to hug you up and pet you now!”
“That would be inappropriate. Now, you acknowledge the superiority of my strategy in this respect. The other part of my superior strategy is to be…?” He raised his eyebrows, obviously bidding her to finish.
Sammy rolled her eyes and sighed again as she said, “Calm, cool, and collected.”
“Precisely! That’s what we are.” Satisfied, the feline flipped through the contract a bit. “Additional concessions are that he always retains the right to appear in his chosen form, imprisoned or no… that you’ll share vital intel for the war between realms… that you’ll deal fairly with his realm in any absence… that he’ll continue to manage his church and territory in the Land of Naug so long as it is within the stipulations provided-”
“So you guys came up with a code, then?”
“No, we took one he already had and modified it. As it turns out, it was potentially tyrannical and reliant on a benevolent dictator from above. While he at least acknowledged our critiques, I’d say he’s not wholly satisfied as he complained a great deal about changes he’d have to make and said doing it all at once would be catastrophic. So we drew up three stages.
“The first is the appointment of dedicated, empowered magistrates — judges, instead of relying entirely on clan rulers. This will first be done as Servitors, but they will teach law so they can eventually be replaced with natives. There is a role already close to this in the church deacons, which naturally seems to have been filled by Naugites of administrative and organizational bent who aren’t charismatic enough to fill the typical authoritarian roles. Zadkiel seems to have intentionally exalted them to a higher status than they’d otherwise obtain without being magic-users.”
“Makes sense. Okay, that sounds like a good start to me. And at this point, you know more about it than me, so go for it on that.”
“Indeed. And he also wants the potential to spread a contract-modified church in the new lands once they are ‘liberated,’ utilizing a more palatable identity to humans, fully integrated with your own and filling in the blanks.”
“Hmmph. So that’s the real angle. But he’d be more limited than me with differing identities. Does he know about the Pantheon?”
“We only hinted at the potential. He is curious but we left all the true details to you, whether to reveal some, all, or none.”
“If he joins the Pantheon, he’ll be even more locked in to behaving under the edicts and such. Let’s be vague in the contract. ‘Must join the existing structure to integrate’ or something like that. And nothing anywhere before I establish my own foothold.”
The cat-lawyer nodded approvingly and summoned a pen to make alterations in a flourish. “Done.”
“So, if everything works out, Sancus, do you think we have him reasonably directed the way we want? How much does he want to push the envelope, do you think?”
“Well, he’s a devil. If he could not push the envelope to some degree, he’d dig in and refuse to cooperate. I think he ultimately hopes to turn the predicament into an advantage. He is ambitious and optimistic or he’d never have tried what he did. He still wants to win the war and smash the Dominion.”
“Why? He won’t be an emperor anymore.”
“I don’t think that was ever his core motive so much as a dreamy bonus, but regardless of his status in the end, he’d expand and increase his glory. Furthermore, he’d restore the wound to his ego. The defeat. Finally, well, I think he is still trying to woo you.”
“What?! But you just told me he wants a marriage to Redberry!”
“He is as aware of her tendencies as anyone. Her pansexuality and openness. I believe he fully expects non-exclusion female-wise, and you being so flirty with him as Puck, while coupled with the highly-sensual Azure, he must see this as a potential doorway.”
“Oh. My. Fucking. Goddess! That lecher thinks he’ll get a deific harem! Idiot!” She sighed and shook her head, flabbergasted by his sexual optimism.
“I’d suggest doing as before and simply exploiting this. After all, he can believe what he wants to believe. Let him have his hope and guile, however futile.”
“Does he want to be teased for eternity?”
“Yes. Because at any given time, it ‘might’ happen through the existing dialog and relationship.”
“What an asshole. Pff. Fine, I won’t hard-check him on it. I’ll exploit it… at least long enough to get the contract signed.”
“That’s all I ask. Perfect. Another stipulation he added — dinner once every month, between him, you, Azure, and optionally Redberry.”
Sammy just facepalmed long and slow. “Get rid of it, Sancus.”
“Done. I take it we’ll be renegotiating the matter of Redberry?”
“No, we’ll be nipping that in the bud. We’ll be ripping the bud totally off! I have no idea if that applies to whatever that analogy means, but you get the idea!”
“Quite. Please keep calm, cool, and collected when he inevitably makes another counteroffer. You can always consult me mentally.”
“How much does he know about her restoration?”
“Nothing verifiable, technically. He is a clever boy, though, and had some intel in the form of rumors coming in, apparently before he could investigate it himself, being busy with Glae and the war maneuvers. He guessed it, and from Azure’s response, may have confirmed it in his head. Nonetheless, we have the wording as ‘when and if restored’ in respect to her.”
“I was going to tell him, but it probably works better this way.” There was a long, long pause as she looked off and bounced things around in her head.
How do I handle this with Red? If I mention his proposal, she’d feel pressure to agree. No. I’m not doing it beforehand, in any case. I’m killing that and he’ll just have to accept it. But… if I don’t go to her eventually to explain, he’ll try to leverage it when he’s free, I know he will. Damn him.
It struck her that she was defiant to the idea, where once she’d considered match-making them. Was it her own cultural stuff in the way? Arranged marriages were pretty much the rule for aeons. Then again, Red was pretty independent comparatively. Perhaps she was overreacting, but it still didn’t mean she was going to tie such a thing into a contract with her.
It also didn’t help that Glae had suggested it, too — Redberry as his ‘leash.’
Is all of this a leash? Is that what I do? I don’t know. But I can’t just let someone without any moral restraint run roughshod — let him kill another Marjorie when it was absolutely preventable and unnecessary. I’m trying to allow as much leeway as possible. In any case, he knows what he’s about. He understands exactly what he’s getting into.
With one final, extended, long-suffering sigh, Sammy said, “Okay. We’ll go in — but first, I gotta talk to Bast.”
✦•············•✦•···········•✦
Bast was conducting research in Zephyr’s massive library when Samantha pinged him. He was burning to understand those focus artifacts he’d had in the vision. Two rods with different routine effects, representative of Control and Power, relatives to the idea of Order and Chaos, but in him, they were stirred together and balanced. At least, that was the idea. It was vital he understood the underlying meanings… especially because those artifacts did not appear to exist.
Not with those names. But we have Tashome, and almost certainly we can find the right baselines to transmute into what I require.
Samantha said they needed to talk about something, so she showed up through a mirror and they sat down in the private study at an ancient, enchanted oak table, in chairs cushioned with soft and cool Aerojelly, which the goddess had never experienced and decided she had to have. Bast pointing out the rarity and expense — as the art of the creation was lost — put something of a damper on it. Instead, she vowed to recreate it.
The subject matter pivoted very quickly to more serious matters as Samantha related the very clandestine operation that had transpired in Pasker County. He knew something big had happened and knew the forces of Zadkiel and the Glaelychus fellow had suffered defeat, but certain things had been kept very foggy for everyone he talked to.
It got cleared up very quickly in the library right then as Samantha dropped the play-by-play in a great torrent. Bast listened quietly, eventually fidgeting with a wooden puzzle of interconnected blocks with symbols on them. Meanwhile, his inner thoughts were in continuous turmoil, never coming to any real conclusion or satisfaction.
“... and that’s where he is now,” Samantha finished. “He’s locked in a cell, and I created the Cat Sith Sancus to help forge a contract with him to return to the world when the time allows us. So. We’re putting together a deal and that’s pretty much-” A great snap of wood interjected the words, but she finished after momentary hesitation with a quiet, “It.”
Bast frowned in annoyance at the puzzle he’d just broken in his hands. Defective. Bah. He dropped the remains on the table and looked up at Samantha, who was looking from his face to the broken pieces a bit worriedly for some reason.
Taking a deep, deep breath, Bast sat back in the chair, feeling the Aerojelly jiggle under his posterior. His jumble of thoughts came together quickly. Satisfaction? Clear. It was actually all quite simple. “I should thank you.”
Samantha quirked an eyebrow, surprised and doubtful. “Really?”
“Yes indeed, Goddess. If you had not intervened, I would have never even had the chance to confront him, much less to destroy him, because he’d be gone. I’d be robbed of my sworn vengeance.”
The Goddess winced with a sickly expression. “Bast, I…”
“Oh, I am not suggesting you line him up for an execution, Your Majesty. I made a principal oath to you and your cause, and I am the very engine of that unstoppable train. How could I get in the way of my own purpose? Your cause became mine. Beyond that, our duel is not yet ready. But when one purpose is complete, when the lands are won and his use to you is finished, I will face him strength for strength, and I will best him. I will kill the God of War with my own hands.”
Samantha stared at him with the same worried expression, wide-eyed and saying nothing.
Bast picked up a broken, somewhat rectangular wooden block from the remains of the puzzle — and grinned to himself for the serendipity, as it had the symbol of a devil’s head on it. He stood it up on the table. “Furthermore, Samantha, whatever it is he does for you? What he provides as personal power to our cause? I will match.”
‘Whatsoever stands against me is devoured.’
Bast flicked the wooden block with his finger, to fall down on the table. “Match and exceed.”
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