God Gave Me Trash System Because I Annoyed Her

Let me make one thing clear:

I didn't choose to join a sect.

I was recruited… after running from a pig.

And not just any pig — a spiritual boar that headbutted me through three trees and used my face as a mop.

So yeah, I wasn't exactly in "genius disciple" shape when I limped into Ironroot Sect's recruitment tent.

---

A wrinkled elder with an overgrown mustache looked me over.

"You smell like fear and mold," he said.

"I call it survival cologne."

He raised a brow. "Name?"

"Arin. Just Arin."

He flipped through some scrolls, frowned, then scribbled my name under a list labeled:

> 'Outer Sect: Cleaning Staff (Backup)'

"Wait—cleaning staff? I thought this was a cultivation sect!"

"We believe in starting from the bottom," he said. "Very bottom."

---

> [System Notification:]

Host has joined Ironroot Sect.

[System recommends staying alive.]

[Bonus Quest Activated:]

Sweep the Training Hall without dying.

Reward: Slight increase in Respect Stat (currently: 0).

Penalty: Further loss of self-esteem.

I sighed.

There I was, the great protagonist of my own story, clutching a broomstick while inner disciples shot fireballs past my head.

One of them laughed. "Hey! New guy! You missed a spot."

"Yeah," I muttered, "your attitude."

---

Later that night, I curled up under a leaky roof, chewing my last moldy biscuit like it was a feast.

Just as I closed my eyes—

> [System Message:]

Emergency Side Quest:

Target: Retrieve Elder Zhan's missing chamber pot.

Location: Outer woods. Possibly near a Spirit Beast nest.

Time Limit: 1 hour.

Reward: 1 mysterious pill. (Possibly expired.)

"What kind of hell-tier RPG am I in?!"

> [Host accepted terms and conditions upon death.]

"No, I didn't! I didn't even get to read the terms!"

> [They were on fire at the time.]

---

Still, I went. Why? Because I was broke, biscuitless, and being watched by a sentient rock named Larry (don't ask).

In the woods, I found the chamber pot… and also found three glowing eyes in the dark.

A low growl.

A spirit wolf stepped forward, eyes blazing like someone stole its lunch money.

> [System Suggestion:]

RUN.

I screamed, grabbed the pot, and ran like I was being chased by divine tax collectors.

And you know what?

I survived.

Barely.

With the pot.

Covered in… never mind.

---

Back at the sect, the elder nodded at my return.

"You have potential," he said.

"Really?"

"Yes. You brought back the pot."

"That's… your definition of potential?"

"Welcome to Ironroot."

---

That night, while cleaning spirit toilets and wondering how my life had fallen apart, I heard the system mutter something:

> [Host has potential. Corrupt system file recommends manipulation. Uploading fake gift file…]

Wait… what was that?

> [Nothing. Please enjoy your expired healing pill.]

I narrowed my eyes.

This system wasn't just trash…

It was scheming.

And so was I.