From Bookish To Goddess

The entrance to the library was brighter than it normally was. The library hadn’t glowed this bright in a long time. It seemed the library was excited to have new patrons. There was a new painting on the wall; it was of me in a long brown dress with a gold plaque beneath it that read “Astrid D. Head Administrator”.

The grin on my face took over as I remembered that dress. It was what I was wearing when I first came to the library. I hadn’t worn it in a very long time, rather I preferred more comfy clothing. A dress that was so low-quality wasn’t the best choice for comfy reading time. Nonetheless, I really should wear it again sometime for nostalgia's sake.

“Mom, look, there are so many books!” Thun said excitedly, eyes glowing with joy.

“Would you like a quick tour?” I asked, looking forward to showing new people around. In the past, I would occasionally give tours to newcomers to the library if I wasn't in the middle of a good book. Which I normally was, so that was a rare thing.

“Yes!” he replied, jumping a little.

“Son, please ask nothing of Lady Astrid. She is already helping us out so much,” Highthorn said, scolding him for speaking so informal.

“Oh, it’s fine. It’s actually something I like to do but haven’t done in a really long time.” It was important to raise kids properly, but I really wasn’t one to care about formality. Formality was just one more thing that would make me anxious. There are far too many customs. 

I needed to figure out exactly how much time had actually passed since I had come to the library. That would require going through the entirety of my memobrary’s memory containment hall, which would be a total struggle wagon. That area was where I could store every interaction I had ever had, but it was a real pain to go through since I had been around for so long. The book “Nizmen’s Guide to Never Forgetting a Thing” was helpful, and the forward was hilarious. The author wrote it because he always misplaced his wand! What arch wizard misplaces their wand!

We walked through the various sections, which I felt like was taking too long. Before I realized it, the children were asleep in their father’s arms, the soft sounds of heavy breathing coming from their mouths. I led us to the private room area so that they could tuck away the kids for the night.

When we arrived at the rooms, I whispered, “Looks like I took too long. These are your rooms. Go ahead and choose any of them. No one else is here.” My room had moved to another area when I became the head administrator. 

Highthorn put them to bed and just sat there, looking at them as he rubbed their heads. So I spoke to Liz, “Hey, he can stay with them. I just want to show you a few more places and have a chat. What I need is information, and either of you can provide that.”

“Honey, Lady Astrid said to stay with the kids and rest. I will talk to her like she asked.” She spoke softly so as to not wake the children.

He smiled at me and got in bed with them, holding them in his arms. He looked so cute, like a bear and its cubs. I was really glad I had saved him. I rubbed my arms while thinking that this moment had made me miss my family, even my fan club, a little. There was no one around who actually knew me, which made me feel lonely. That was part of the price I had paid for being in here for so long.

Liz gently closed the door behind her, turning around with a sullen look. She faced me and took a huge deep breath, looking like she was trying to maintain control of her emotions. There were probably thousands of things running through her head.

“Are you okay? Do you need anything?” I asked, wanting to help her. I could cast a spell on her if she wanted to make her thoughts subside.

“No, you have already done so much for us. It’s been a really long couple of days. So many things are changing. So many things I don't know how to handle,” she replied, clearing up the sullen look on her face. She still seemed worn out and tired, but less gloomy.

“Yeah, it’s been like that for me since I left the library. Do you want to get some rest yourself?”

“No, I need to decompress anyway. I also told you we would chat. It’s the least I can do. Maybe I can answer some questions you have.”

“Oh, that would be good. Let’s go to the cafe!”

“Cafe? Okay, I don't know what that is but I will follow you,” she replied sounding genuinely confused.

The wizard that had brought in the cafe idea said they would be all the rage, with one on every corner. I guess he was wrong. Well, an apocalypse can do that. Maybe they were popular and just went away. I should check if any history books mention them. 

We headed to the cafe, which was a small area filled with red cushioned dark oak chairs. The tables were engraved with the outlines of board games. The walls were plastered with favorite quotes from the books in the library. The air was filled with the scent of roasted coffee beans. There was a counter with a bear guard behind it, ready to take and make our orders. 

“Is that a stuffed bear?” Lizlin asked, sounding perturbed.

“Yes, it is. Well I call it a bearista. They are the guards of the library. I was wondering why I hadn’t seen a bear on our tour. They may have been on break. They are really sweet and good with kids. You should have your children play with them while you are here,” I replied, knowing that they were probably hiding from me. As punishment, I decided to sic the kids on them. They had been alone in the library also, so maybe they would like the attention. Who knew? I didn’t. Upon thinking about it, I needed to find a better way to communicate with the bears. I would have to reference my books later on. Maybe some sort of mental connection could be established that allowed for more than just commands.

“Oh, so they are friendly?”

“Yes, Very friendly. They serve some functions other than just guarding. They clean up, organize books, retrieve books, and run this specialty area, amongst others. There are some people that think they are fully sentient, but I have never really investigated it. I probably will at some point. Let’s get our drinks.” My personal thoughts were that they were quasi-sentient or golem spirits.

I walked up to the bearista and gave my order. “One iced coffee with milk and sugar.”

The bear turned around to the back countertop. A small light glowed around his hands. I knew he was conjuring what I had ordered out of the library’s mana. It was like the cafeteria that could materialize anything ordered, but I preferred this place more. It was far more personnel, even if it was just a stuffed bear. I grabbed a menu off of the counter and handed it to Liz.

She was staring at what the bearista was doing. This wasn’t strange. She had probably never seen magic like this. She snapped out of it when I gave her the menu. “Oh, I can read this. It’s in my language. It surprised me to see that everything was in our language,” she said calmly before getting excited. “OH, there is sweet bread and juice? I have only had sweet bread once.”

Following my lead, she spoke, “Could I get two pieces of sugar bread and grapple juice?”

It surprised me that she mustered up the courage so fast. The food probably motivated her. It appeared we maybe mood kindred about food. “Yep, that’s how you do it. You only think it’s in your language because it’s using advanced magic. There are lots of quirks like that here.”

“Oh, that is very interesting. Do you need help around here? I could work for you,” she said with hope-filled eyes.

My face scrunched up, causing her to look tense up. I was trying to figure out how to explain it to her. While I wouldn’t mind her help, there were consequences and she had to know about them before making that kind of decision.

“I apologize for stepping over boun—”

I cut her reply off. “No, no, it’s not that. There are just complications with working here. You don’t age while you are here. So you would outlive your kids and grandkids even if you went home after work.”

“This is really another realm. The realm of the goddess.”

I cringed a little when she called me the goddess. “No, well yes. Probably whoever made it was the actual deity of knowledge. Others have theorized that it’s a culmination of several powerful people.” I personally agreed with the former, considering how it was able to maintain energy.

The bearista set the drinks on the countertop with a small plate of bread. I took my drink and headed to an empty two person table. I set my drink on top of the table and flopped onto the squishy chair. This place had some of the best chairs to read on.

Liz thanked the bear and followed behind with her order. I sipped my drink, enjoying the flavor and energy it provided. Liz came to life again as she ate her food. She enjoyed every bite, but she managed not to scarf it down, unlike me the other night.

“So I would like you to be candid with me for this conversation. I understand you still won’t want to be honest, but I really want you to be. We are all equals in the library, book lovers at heart. We are here to learn and read, not follow noble etiquette,” I said hoping to assuage her fears so that I could get some good information. That was what I really needed.

“I will attempt to.”

“Okay, I am going to ramble so I will have the bearista bring us drinks as they empty.” I signaled to the bearista with mental commands to keep our drinks full. I had read through the command list presented to me in the head librarian guide.

Liz drank the rest of her juice fast, probably in anticipation of more. It seemed she had only been reserved thinking she couldn’t get more.

“So, all of you think I am a deity, but I am not. I have a general idea of how it happened, but I am not the goddess you think I am. I probably appear to be one because of my powers, but I am very mortal. There is a very particular set of rules associated with being a deity. I don’t want to be one either; I just want to read and get more books for the library. I am thinking about camouflaging or disguising myself, but I haven’t decided yet. Any thoughts?” I said, taking a gulp of my drink after saying so much at once.

“I need a moment to think about this.”

“Of course,” I replied, sipping my drink. She was eating the sweet bread while she thought. I liked the fact that she was taking the time to consider her answer rather than just spouting something off. I hoped it meant she would be more honest.

“You are a very kind person and can do a lot of good for the world. You can help people like my family who were exiled for one reason or another.”

I felt a little guilty from her words, which must have shown on my face because Liz didn’t give me a chance to respond.

“Not that you're obligated to at all. You are a goddess to everyone. Even if you say you're not, you are still of superior status. You have great power and can come to this place. So much status people would probably just give you whatever you wanted. Things like money or land or books. If people thought you were the goddess, you would get even more of what you seek. “

I smiled at the realization I could just have the books come to me. It made sense, of course; if people worshiped then I could ask for books as praise and punishment. Being a goddess shouldn’t be too hard. “Yes, that’s a great idea. If I can put up with it, people will bring me books! I also get to help people at the same time. Maybe I can find some suitable candidates to bring to the library.”

“Did you want to see the wastelands outside the dome?”

It surprised me she was comfortable asking me something rather than answering. “Yes, I really haven’t seen what this world has come to. There is just a lot to do on my list and it is hard to prioritize what I should complete first.”

“I think you should go outside of the dome and see what it is like. Visiting the refuge would give you some good perspective to compare to life inside the dome. It’s pretty bad out there. From what we have heard, most of the buildings are in poor condition. The lives of the children out there are terrible. There may be some books that were smuggled out.”

It was obvious she was trying to leave me a trail of crumbs, but I wanted to see if I could help them anyway. “Oh, I could hunt for rare books. That would be great. I am sure I could snap up some land out there and also open a sub-library as an entrance to my library. I will have to wait till I get there to see what I can do.”

“Well, there is plenty of lands out there. Basically other than the roads that the corporations use, it is all open. Most of the structures there are dilapidated, so they would probably like any development out there.”

A plan to fix the area outside the dome came to mind. I would need to do research on town development in my memobrary, but I think I could make a difference out there. This would be a chance to practice what I theorized when I read the book series “Mythical City Creators Journals”. There were 5 volumes but I could never really put anything into practice because I was inside the library. Theory is fun to ponder on, but practice allows you to work out the issues. From the sound of it, they would appreciate anything I did. If they asked to pay me, then I would just ask for books. Unsure of myself, I thought I would check if the situation was really that bad. “So it’s terrible out there? Like anything I did would be a help?”

“From what we hear, it is horrendous. Again, thank you for saving us, so that we didn't have to experience it.”

“Alright, it’s decided. I shall go outside the dome and get books. I mean, help rebuild the town.” Dang it, I slipped up. I was trying to not be so focused on books, but it’s what I really wanted.

“That would be fantastic. Lots of people in the dome have family out there. People are rarely able to communicate with them.”

“Well, we should probably get some rest. I will do some research before I get to sleep,” I said, knowing that I would also do research while I slept.

“I am wide awake after that food. It is stronger than coffee. I or my husband can go with you tomorrow. We can bring the whole family if you want.”

“No, you should probably stay here with the kids. It would be safer. Feel free to look around and read. Also, don’t forget that the bears love kids. I will put you to sleep,” I said, knowing that I always kept a sleep spell on hand for when I was just too into a book to pass out. “Don’t Count Sheep Just Go To Sleep With Magic By Somnus” gave some good ideas on how to put people to sleep, whether they had muscle pain, psychological anguish, poison, curses, or other issues. With a wave of my hand, I cast the basic sleep spell.

“What woah, okay, I am sleepy now.” She slowly got up and slightly stumbly made her way to her family’s room.

I got together my thoughts on what I had to do the next day and headed to my bedroom to get some rest and enter my memobrary as I slept.