Evil Organization’s Extra Mr. A

[ 10th Chapter ]

I do not believe in gods. Regardless of whether or not I have faith, I never even consider the existence of such a being. Our hometown’s humans have advanced into space, and everything is accomplished through science and technology.

From a physics student’s perspective, the things that are said to be done by gods are impossible to explain scientifically. I can believe in spiritual beings, but the concept of a god was never a familiar word to me from a young age. Today, for the first time since my birth, I found myself searching for the existence of a god.

Oh God. What is going on here?

There happened to be a motel across from where we were avoiding the rain, and Yubin, who claimed her legs hurt, suggested resting there.

We eventually entered, and since it wasn’t available for a short stay, we paid for an overnight stay. Due to lack of maturity, I stood blankly in the lobby, and Yubin completed the payment and led us to the room, after which I put down the shopping bag and found myself in this situation.

Sitting side by side on the bed, we couldn’t bring ourselves to speak due to the strange atmosphere. I couldn’t think of any reason how we ended up in this situation. We had been walking and chatting happily until before the rain started, yet it felt like ages ago.

“Older Brother… you go first.”

Her usual lively voice was gone, and the strong and powerful Red, as I knew her, was nowhere to be seen.

“Me? First?!”

Unable to maintain composure, my voice uncontrollably rose to an unusually high pitch.

“Should I just go first?”

Our eyes met, and I saw my flustered reflection in Yubin’s red eyes. At that moment, some rationality returned to me.

No matter how much I thought about it, this was not right. As a monitor and regardless of Yubin being the monitored, I strongly felt that I shouldn’t judge the situation based on instinct alone.

If I acted on impulse and got into trouble, our entire relationship could crumble instantly. It was best to distance myself from this situation, at least for now.

Having made up my mind, I abruptly stood up from my seat, startling Yubin, who looked up at me. Without looking back, I moved towards the entrance one step at a time.

“I’ll take a taxi and go ahead, so you can rest here for a bit.”

I denied the thoughts that had been plaguing my mind since yesterday and repeatedly told myself that I needed to leave this place. The door, which should have been just a few steps away, felt impossibly distant.

“Ah…”

I heard Yubin’s short breath but didn’t look at her. I had no confidence in controlling myself if I remained, given how instinctively I might act based on what came to mind.

I turned the corner and put on my shoes at the entrance. Just as I reached for the doorknob, I stopped, hearing a voice from inside the room behind me.

Ever since we met by chance and had dinner, then went home, perhaps even before that, I felt something was off.

The image of Older Brother during dinner, his demeanor when greeting, and his appearance tomorrow kept recurring in my mind.

How can I get closer and become better acquainted with Older Brother? Upon reflection, I realized that while Older Brother uses informal speech with me, I still use formal speech with him. Could it be that I haven’t gotten closer because I’m using formal speech? Would Older Brother be okay if I suddenly switched to informal speech? I hope he wouldn’t dislike it.

Waiting for Older Brother to come after work felt unbearably long, especially since I had never experienced such a feeling before. I greeted customers at the convenience store normally and turned my head each time I heard a door close.

I knew Older Brother’s arrival time was roughly fixed, and even though it wasn’t time yet, I wondered if he might come earlier today.

I was aware that Older Brother, who usually came at the same time every day for over a month, would unlikely show up at a different time.

With determination to wait, I served a customer and heard the door opening. When I turned my head, I saw the Older Brother I had been waiting for.

With joy, I called out to him loudly. Our eyes met, and despite the obvious sound, he walked straight into the convenience store without answering.

I felt foolish and somewhat disappointed, as if I were a fool for having waited for him to come.

Every time Older Brother visited the convenience store, he always paid and left immediately. It was expected that he would do so again today, but I felt sad seeing him leave. Could it be that I can’t have him stay?

Even when I couldn’t see him, I kept thinking about him, and now that I could see him, I wanted to see him even more than ever. Even while seeing him, I couldn’t stop wanting to see him more.

I held Older Brother back when I thought I might not see him again until tomorrow if I let him leave through that door. I hoped Older Brother would stay at the convenience store. I wondered if Older Brother would come to the convenience store where I am and keep coming back to see me.

I saw Older Brother looking at me intently while heating up a bento box in the microwave. If he stared at me so openly, it felt awkward to look back.

When I asked why he kept looking at me, he simply replied, “Just because.” There was no particular reason for Older Brother to look at me; he saw me because I was there, in the convenience store.

Why did I want to see Older Brother so badly?

Because I liked him?

No. It’s different from liking him.

The reason I want to see Older Brother is… I just want to see him. I just want to see Older Brother too.

While arranging cigarettes on the counter, I noticed Older Brother talking on the phone with someone. As I approached, I heard a woman’s voice. Who could it be? A friend? Family? Maybe a girlfriend?

The person Older Brother was talking to was his supervisor at work. Since Older Brother wouldn’t lie to me about such matters, I believed him and could focus on my work again.

Looking at Older Brother sitting in the convenience store, I noticed his outfit today. Had I been so focused on his face that I hadn’t noticed his attire all along?

Today, he dressed normally. I hoped he would continue dressing like this. Until now, I hadn’t known what I liked, but I realized I enjoyed simple styles.

Given this, I decided to talk about the clothes Older Brother wore last time.

Seeing the shock on Older Brother’s face, I wondered if I had been too blunt, feeling both regret and amusement. Avoiding eye contact, Older Brother mentioned going to buy clothes.

“When?”

I wished it could be a day when we could go together. If I could find a way to take time off from work next week, I would definitely want to go together.

It seemed Older Brother planned to buy clothes tomorrow or the day after. Since I couldn’t take off this week’s work, how could I persuade him to go on another day?

“Want to go together?”

Those words made me feel like I had the world in my hands.

I suggested we go together after finishing work tomorrow. This must be a date. Isn’t it? Going shopping together after work is definitely a date. There’s no other way to describe it.

“I’ll go!”

After energetically agreeing and deciding to go together, Older Brother left for home. I was in a panic. My heart raced, unable to calm down.

As soon as work ended, I ran home at full speed. Once inside, I turned on the old, cheap laptop and searched the internet for men’s clothing.

I don’t have a boyfriend, let alone a male friend, but I know a bit about women’s fashion, though I know nothing about men’s clothing. I can tell if something looks good or bad, but I don’t know what suits Older Brother’s style or what colors match well.

It seems Older Brother knows little about clothing too. I need to be sure about what I’m choosing to pick the right clothes and ensure Older Brother looks good. Although I worried I might be overly fond of Older Brother’s appearance, I concluded that it’s better to appreciate him looking good than poorly dressed.

I spent the night watching videos online about men’s clothing and fell asleep when dawn broke. Throughout the morning, I worked at the convenience store until an hour before closing, when I suddenly wondered what Older Brother would wear.

I had prepared myself and went out, hoping Older Brother had also paid attention. Seeing Older Brother’s outfit, I realized he looked very different from what I imagined.

Despite that, his choice wasn’t the worst possible, and among the options, he picked a decent combination.

Right after leaving the convenience store, I saw Older Brother. He had dressed exactly as I had said.

I wore a polar fleece with a chest hole and a short black skirt, wondering if Older Brother would like it.

At the department store, I chose Older Brother’s clothes with a serious expression. Many couples were around, and I felt a sense of responsibility to choose well for Older Brother. I focused on the outfits I had seen in videos the previous day.

Older Brother tried on all the clothes I picked and bought the ones he liked the most.

After buying all the clothes, Older Brother let me choose his outfit.

He had chosen my outfit seriously. Did I have such a serious expression when picking Older Brother’s clothes?

I intended to buy clothes, but the price was higher than expected. While I could afford it, I wouldn’t have enough money until next month’s salary.

Older Brother had picked out these clothes. Should I buy them anyway? As I hesitated, Older Brother used his card to pay for the clothes, saying it was a gift in return for picking them out.

The outfit Older Brother bought was a black dress, which suited him well.

What matters isn’t whether they fit well; the most important thing is that it’s Older Brother’s first gift to me.

After leaving the department store, we wandered around looking for a restaurant to eat at.

We ended up far from any restaurant because we only walked and talked. When we tried to turn back, it started raining.

Why does it have to rain on our first date? I felt slightly resentful toward the sky and glanced at the motel across the street.

If we stayed at that motel tonight, would Older Brother continue to stay with me? I’ve never done this before, but maybe it would be okay. Older Brother is kind, so it would probably be fine.

Driven by anxiety that Older Brother might reject me, I quickly grabbed his hand and led him to the room.

Sitting side by side on the bed, Older Brother seemed more concerned. After working and getting caught in the rain, it might be best to shower.

Older Brother abruptly stood up and walked toward the entrance.

“Ah…”

I reached out to grab Older Brother but stopped, realizing I had made a mistake.

I had liked Older Brother on my own, without asking for his opinion, and happily walked with him, holding his hand freely. I wondered what Older Brother’s expression was when I was enjoying myself.

I had selfishly led Older Brother here, although he didn’t intend to. Despite being alone, I didn’t like being alone. No one else was around. Not Mom, not Dad.

But then Older Brother appeared, accepting my calls and not complaining about anything I did.

I had mistakenly thought everything was fine.

I couldn’t call out to Older Brother, who was gradually moving away. If I left now, I might never see Older Brother again. Older Brother probably wouldn’t want to be with someone as reckless as me.

So, I was left alone. Even after Older Brother showed kindness, I still acted recklessly and ended up alone.

Someone like me is better off being alone…

I couldn’t raise my head. Tears welled up, threatening to spill. I had to hold on just a little longer.

When Older Brother opens the door and leaves, I will cry then. I couldn’t show a pitiful face.

“Gah, huhhh!”

Even as I bit my lip and screamed internally, the tears wouldn’t stop.

Closing my eyes tightly to stop the tears didn’t work either.

Feeling the warmth on my hand, I looked up to see Older Brother sitting and holding my hand, looking directly into my eyes.

Though I came to invade Earth, I am not a demon.

Although we were born in different places, I could empathize with the emotions of people on Earth.

“Why are you crying?”

Seeing a crying girl makes anyone feel sympathy and worry.

“No, I’m not. I’m not crying…”

I wiped the flowing tears and forced a smile.

I am monitoring Yubin, but today feels like a day of leisure, and I am happy.

For a moment, I thought this kind of relationship wasn’t so bad.

But if this relationship continues, it will lead to an unbearable outcome.

If I touched Yubin, who has opened her heart to me, in a way that goes against her feelings, it might cause irreparable damage as a human to human interaction, not as an adversary.

Yes. I should go back for Yubin’s sake.

That was the reason I decided to go back, not to force a smile or make such a face.

When I held Yubin’s hand, which was trying to force a smile, she started crying again.

“Older Brother, I’m sorry.”

She apologized, her voice barely audible, choking back sobs.

No matter how much I think about it, Yubin hasn’t done anything wrong to me. Why is she apologizing to me?

“You’re great, Older Brother. I don’t know what to do. I’m sorry. I’ve just been acting recklessly. I’m sorry…”

I’m perceptive.

Seeing Yubin, I realized she had feelings for me. It’s obvious unless one is a fool.

But I deliberately ignored those feelings and denied them each time they came to mind. I thought it was for the best.

Even though I recognized Yubin’s feelings, I denied them, and ultimately, my ignorant actions made a girl cry.

“No, I’m the one who should apologize.”

I hugged and comforted her, patting her back.

How much had I suffered inside while pretending not to show my true feelings? How anxious must she have been, seeing my unresponsive reactions?

My unconscious actions and unintentional behaviors must have felt special to her. She had fallen for me because of my actions, and I irresponsibly pretended not to notice.

In dramas, there are often characters who treat others kindly, making them fall for them, yet fail to recognize their feelings, causing pain. Although they are fictional, I truly despised such characters. If they were going to make someone fall for them, they shouldn’t have misled them…

Yet, I was doing the worst thing I could imagine.

After crying for a long time, Yubin and I sat side by side on the bed again. The only difference was that I still held her hand tightly.

“I’m sorry. I thought you were leaving, and I thought I’d never see you again.”

It seemed my intention to leave was mistaken as a desire not to see Yubin.

I never imagined HunterKiller’s Red could be this vulnerable.

“I won’t leave. I’ll stay here until morning.”

Upon hearing this, she leaned closer to me, seemingly relieved. My repressed feelings burst forth, and I squeezed her hand gently.

Interpreting this as a signal, she raised her head and looked at me, and our eyes met.

“But, if I stay here, it might be difficult to maintain my… self-control.”

Where did the playful comment about going first go? Yubin’s face flushed as red as her usual suit, and her gaze wavered downward.

I wanted to say something, but my lips trembled, unsure of what to say.

“It’s… it’s fine.”

Huh?

“If it’s Older Brother, it’s fine…”

Seeing her flushed face trying to speak made it clear that maintaining self-control was nearly impossible. In truth, the outcome was predetermined. Two people alone in a motel on a rainy weekend. Is there really anything left to think about?

“Are you really okay with whatever happens?”

When Yubin lifted her head again and our eyes met, she leaned closer and kissed me.

My body stiffened momentarily, then relaxed. After a brief kiss, she pulled away and we looked at each other again.

“Um, I haven’t showered yet…”

“It’s fine.”

Unable to resist my desires, I laid Yubin down on the bed, trembling with embarrassment.