Eldritch

 

Okay, I'm confused.

Why is the entity I came to meet here looking exactly like me?
And why is it acting so familiar?
As if we'd know us.
I almost believe it's annoyed by me.

 

"Uh, ehm. Do we know each other?" (I)

"Do we know each other? Do we know each other?! If it wouldn't backfire at me I'd slap you! Do you have any idea what I've been through because of you?!" (I 2)

"Wh-what? I don't understand! Who are you?" (I)

"I'm you and no one else." (I 2)

"Ehm, sorry. I don't understand." (I)

"Oh, you will. Because I've had enough of this! It's your fault that I got stranded in this damned shithole of a dimension! And while I fight here for my continued existence you're enjoying your sweet life back at home! The simple fact that I'm differentiating between us is bad enough. But this will change now!" (I 2)

 

With each word of barely contained fury, she moves closer in a mix of walking and gliding on the ground.
She extends her arm in my direction and I fear what will happen when she reaches me.

No, she certainly shouldn't touch me with this!
I need to get away from here!

 

"Back home, back home, back..." (I)

"Oh no, you don't!" (I 2)

 

"Sstk"

 

"Iekh!" (I)

 

I feel a sting at my foot and find a tiny weird flesh strand there, emerging from the ground, plugging into my foot like a cable.
I still feel some kind of teleportation sense, that tells me I could do so if I press it, but it's not as effortless like before.
Yet I could push through and get away from here.

 

"I wouldn't recommend teleporting now. Unless you want to take this whole structure with you, wherever you intended to go." (I)

 

What?! I cannot escape?

I try to rip the strand away, even growing a small blade at my hand to cut it, but whenever I achieve to sever this surprisingly durable thing, it is immediately replaced by a similar one that sticks into another place or even the other foot.
I soon realize that this is pointless and instead look at my smirking doppelgänger.

 

"Did you really think I would let you do the same thing as last time?" (I 2)

"Last time?" (I)

"Yes, last time. You know, when you again were too weak to show even the slightest bit of resistance against an enemy who was set to slash you into pieces and I had to take over. And as thanks you simply abandoned me. Thanks for that." (I 2)

"A-abandoned you?" (I)

"Yes! You already almost went insane after only some few hours. How about trying a whole week?" (I 2)

 

A week?
Wait! That story!
There's just one explanation!

 

"You... Are you my arm?" (I)

"Oh please. Don't simplify it like this. I'm as much you as I am I. But not wholly, as less you are." (I 2)

 

I'm rather sure I make right now a silly expression, but this was pure mad talk.

 

"Fine, I see it's yet too difficult for me to get this. Let's say, I'm something we could fall back to if we need some enforcement. Or rather, ask yourself, how many things you've killed since you cut me away and left me for good?" (I 2)

 

How many things I've killed?
Now that I think about it, after that incident, I had no greater violent outbursts.
Some moments when I've lost control over my powers maybe, but nothing died due to them.
Not even this goddess or those hoodlums who weren't too nice.
Compared to what I did in this world before I was a saint.

So about what are we talking here?
Is she truly something who was the whole time present?
That could control my very own actions and made me eradicate everything that attacked me?
Like for example that ghost I encountered when I returned home?
This means she's my... killer instinct?

 

"Well, you could say so. Or survival instinct for a more pleasant connotation. However, that's not all. I'm much more of us than just this one single concept. An amalgamation of all the dark and necessary dirty strokes you usually won't use. Yet for simplicities sake, let's call it that. I'm your survival instinct." (I 2)

 

Wait, I didn't say that out loud!

How could she answer?

 

"What do you think is this thing at our foot for? We're connected, as we should be." (I 2)

 

Panic seizes me, but I know I have to persevere and ask the relevant questions.

 

"What do you want?" (I)

"Damn, I really am dumb, huh? Naturally we merge again. And this time I'll make sure that such a separation will never repeat." (I 2)

 

Repeat? How will she enforce this?
God, she's basically my dark twin.
What happens if she merges with me?

Will I stay who I am?

Will anything stay?!

Oh no, she... She's going to control me!
I'm going to be possessed!
My mind will be put to sleep, expelled, dissolved into nothing so that she can move my body like a puppet.
I don't want this!!!

My emotional stress takes over.
Suddenly the ground quakes and huge limbs burst out of my back, while spikes grow out of the walls, ready to expel terror at my twin.

 

"Oh my, I really have a tendency to overreact. But please, proceed. You know what happens if you do so, right? I'm getting absorbed by you, but different to prey, I'm you. I won't simply vanish. You're just helping me out here." (I 2)

 

Does this mean I would just open her a path into my mind?
Not good.
But what else can I do?
My other side meanwhile steps slowly closer in my direction.

 

"Stay away! I won't let you claim my body! You, you can't!" (I)

"Geeze. We've really seen too many anime. Calm down. You're not going to be controlled." (I 2)

"You just said yourself that you won't allow a repetition. You want to take control over whatever I am!" (I)

"Now would you please stop? It's not working like this. We aren't separate beings. Me and you, we are part of the same whole." (I 2)

"What does that even mean?"! (I)

"Think about it like this, would you separate all your doubts, worries, and insecurities, as well as your passivity and timidness, simply all the pushover personality strokes you have to offer and seal them away, how much of your character, your very being, would remain?" (I 2)

 

Even if she could've described this a bit nicer, I get what she wants to say.
She means what would be left of my character without all of my personality traits.

 

"Not too much?" (I)

"Exactly. And that's the point. There is no way to take control because we are one of the same whole. You can't expel half of what you are without consequences. What you see here is what I was capable to create with the part of us that I am. Splitting us means that only a fraction acts which directly reduces our capabilities." (I 2)

"So, you're not going to suppress me?" (I)

"We, like any other person are able to take a part of our personality and hide it away deep inside. For example, you could stuff it in that cage you were imagining just now, like it's common in some animes. Yet something like that would eventually resurface and excessively blow up. So, no, I'm not going to do any of the things you fear." (I 2)

"You say so, but you're exactly behaving like the typical evil body snatcher. And even if not, if I'd let you... urgh, merge. This can't be good. At least not for my character." (I)

"Would you please stop delusionally making things up?! We were together before and you were content with your personality back then, right? I'm not even everything of your rougher side. Just a fraction." (I 2)

"I don't know what to think! I'm scared!" (I)

"Oh yes, this much is obvious. The thing is, you need me." (I 2)

"Need you? You killed so many living beings! I don't want this." (I)

"Tsk, to think I am that dumb. Do you even have any idea what the big ones over there can do? What they were ought to do to us when we were still stranded in this dimension?" (I 2)

 

She points at some assembled demons which all apparently quiver in fear of her and seem to revere her as some goddess.

 

"If I hadn't put up some fight back then we could have gotten absorbed and redistributed into this world. And believe me, we don't want this." (I 2)

"Still! I, I cannot do this. You too surely don't want to stop being your own person. So why don't we forget about this?" (I)

 

The way she further advances while wielding this unyielding stare tells me that she doesn't intend to stop.

 

"You don't seem to understand. This state is not natural for me. I'm not my own person and don't want to be. All my efforts were directed towards merging us. So sorry, but you have no word in this. Now it's time to become whole again!" (I 2)

 

She steps again forward in my direction, coming too close to be comfortable.
I see tentacles emerge at her side and fear what will happen now.

 

"Done" (I 2)

 

"Flick"

 

"Ouch!" (I)

 

I tend to that stinging sensation at my forehead.

Looking for the reason, I find my dark twin's outstretched middle finger in front of me.
As well as her.
What is going on?

 

"Di-didn't you say you wanted to merge?" (I)

"No problem. I already did just that." (I 2)

"But, but you are still here!" (I)

"And with you. It's all the same. Don't think too deeply about this or your head will hurt. If it could." (I 2)

"I don't feel like anything changed." (I)

 

I mean, wouldn't there at least be the slightest shift in my thoughts?
Something that sets this apart from the continuity?

 

"You simply won't notice such an insignificant difference. Hm, but you're right. As I've mentioned before you're rejecting me. Too cowardly to really let me inside. However, I'm already connected. If you'd cut me off now I would still be in your mind." (I 2)

 

This doesn't sound soothing.
Not a bit.

 

"Please stop the distress. It's annoying." (I 2)

"Then get out of my head!!" (I)

"I really have no idea how that works, huh? We are the same. I feel and think everything the same you do. Right now I'm even catching up on your memories. You were too nice. Those thugs should have gotten a more emphatic warning." (I 2)

"You would have merged them, right?" (I)

"Not necessarily. On my own, maybe. But with you, we'd compromise. Something like sending lasting nightmares directly into their minds." (I 2)

 

I'm really hideous.
That reminds me.

 

"But you didn't do anything to mum when she hit me." (I)

"What do you take me for? As if I would eradicate mum! Come on!" (I 2)

"And what about Kyumi?" (I)

"I am not as feral as I would lose control for getting splashed with water by a mermaid. Maybe I should have done something with more impact, but I can judge levels of aggressivity. I could easily see the scared girl behind her act." (I 2)

"So that's it? If I teleport now, you're coming with me?" (I)

"Yes. But not in this form. Instead as a part of your personality. At the moment, a suppressed shard that's going to get activated whenever you're in a pinch. And as I've mentioned that kind of unhealthy way of handling your own personality strokes is going to lead to violent outbursts at times." (I 2)

 

I am not too sure if this arrangement is something I'd want.
Maybe I shouldn't have come here.

 

"If you'd stayed away in the worst case I would have had to rip a portal back home." (I 2)

 

God! Why does she have to read my thoughts?
That's annoying.
And what the heck does she mean with this?!
Ripping a portal open?

 

"What do you think I did here the whole time? Look up!" (I 2)

 

I look where she points and a hole forms there through all the fleshy mass surrounding us, granting sight to the other planet.
I don't know what to make out of it.
It's a reddish color and looks not too different from the others.
I turn back to my clone.

 

"I don't know what you mean." (I)

"Fine, then like this. Might be considered to be a little invasive, but that doesn't apply to us since we are same person." (I 2)

 

Suddenly thoughts flood my mind.
Images, sequences, ideas. An almost overwhelming amount.
However, I don't I just get enough at once that I can process it.

 

"What is this?!" (I)

"You already have all the memories I accumulated. If you assess them we'll get over this much faster than if I'd tell myself every little thing, word by word. Now lean back and enjoy the show." (I 2)