Chapter 12: Helpless
Making our way back to the Shunning Grounds, the two of us walked side-by-side. The path was clear of hostile creatures, and I occasionally checked the map to ensure we were on the right path.
Yet, there was a teeny, tiny problem.
What was the problem, you ask?
"So…" I said unsurely, "Hath thou thought of learning how to cook from Gordon? So, we doth not need to rely on him all the time?"
My question was met with silence as she ignored everything that came out of my mouth.
"It wouldst be quite enjoyable to taste something created by thy hands," I continued despite her indifference.
I kept talking, but I was ignored each time. The conversation died out slowly, and silence dominated the space between us. I let out a frustrated sigh, starting to feel hints of annoyance at her actions.
This– this was the problem.
Since our trek to the Shunning Grounds, Mehg has continually ignored me.
Usually, it wouldn't be such a problem. I would just bide my time and wait for her to calm down, and it's not like she stays angry for long.
This time, however, she was really, really angry, considering she didn't respond with a single peep or grunt, no matter how much I pestered her.
However, I couldn't back down on this one.
I understood she was overprotective and afraid something might happen to me, but she was being too restrictive. I needed some freedom to move freely without anyone breathing down my neck.
I tried to think of something to break the silence, and eventually, my mind went elsewhere, and I remembered a quest I had recently gained.
"Sister…" I called.
Yet, she didn't respond.
"Sis…" I called again.
Yet, she didn't respond.
I felt a spark of anger, but I smothered it then and there, breathing a heavy sigh to control my emotions.
"Mehg, look at me," I called, my tone having an edge to it.
It worked, as she reluctantly decided to grace me with her attention.
"What?" she asked, her tone sharp.
My eyes twitched at her response, my nose flaring in indignation.
"'What?' Don't what me, sister. Especially after ignoring me for the last few minutes."
She stared at me blankly, her eyes showing no hints of any particular emotion.
I ignored that, getting to the point as I asked my question.
"Hath thou ever thought of leaving this place?"
Upon hearing my question, she stopped in her tracks, a thoughtful expression taking its place on her face.
"Thou knoweth we canst not leave with the seal in 'lace, 'rother. So, why wouldst thou ask 'e this?"
I rolled my eyes at her stating the obvious.
"Suppose, hypothetically, if we were to shatter the seal, then wouldst thou wish to leave?" I threw the question her way, causing her to think carefully instead of just brushing it off.
At first, she seemed to struggle, unsure what to think or say.
"I… a' not sure. Where wouldst we even go? How wouldst we survive? We know nothing of the world 'eyond the seal, and neither Tricia nor the other 'er-'er'u-'er'u'ers– the other healers tell us anything."
She expressed her concerns, which were all valid from her perspective. She had no memories of the city aboveground or her childhood. She knew neither the beauty nor the cruelty the world beyond held.
Again, her concerns were valid because she didn't know what lay aboveground.
But I did, to a certain degree.
The outside world was indeed quite dangerous, but the Shunning Grounds weren't exactly safe either.
From the little bits and pieces of information I gleaned from Tricia, it has been more than a decade since the Golden Order was established. Yet, in such a short time, it has managed to gather a following of hundreds of thousands of people.
In the game, the majority of the Golden Order was predominantly racist, as their primary approach to other… less human species was either genocide, or slavery.
Case in point: the Trolls.
Even after betraying the Giants and siding with the Golden Order, their fate was less than savory; their guts were gouged out, and they were bound in chains, forced into servitude until their dying breaths.
Since the war has not happened in this timeline, the Trolls have lived peacefully… I think.
But the same cannot be said for the Omens. Although we have been living in relative peace, how long until said peace is shattered?
How long until the Golden Order decided we've bred enough and sought to cull the population below?
How long… until the first Omenkiller descends here and sets a precedent that would be upheld for years to come?
Just thinking about it fills me with dread. There's no way in hell I'm going to wait for them to come and slaughter their way through this entire place. I will leave this place, not just alone, but with Mehg and maybe even Gordon. If they're unwilling, then I'll drag them out. If they're unsure, then I'll convince them.
Even if I have to lie to them.
"I wouldst not be so sure about that," I said confidently, putting on my best poker face.
"Huh?" That was all that came out of her mouth as I continued speaking.
"The world that exists beyond this place… I know of it," I spoke mysteriously, and the response I received was expected yet unwelcome.
"I know what thou will sayeth, so stop gazing at me with such a buffoonish expression on thy face. I know, for I learned from one of the Perfumers."
She gave an 'Ah!' at my excuse, but I paid it no mind as I kept speaking.
"I know of Stormveil, a magnificent castle that stands atop a cliff, surrounded by vicious winds that rage across day and night. Of Liurnia: A vast wetland with shallow waters surrounded by high cliffs, its forest perpetually blanketed in fog."
Taking a quick peek, Mehg's eyes were set on me, intently listening as I regaled her with the sights of this land.
"The Mountaintops, eternally blanketed in snow and frost, once lorded over by the Ice Dragons, now home to the Fire Giants and their lesser kin."
My voice gradually became more passionate, and my emotions resonated with Mehg's as her body trembled in anticipation.
"The Altus Plateau, under the shade of the Erdtree, bathed in its light and falling golden leaves."
Suddenly, my voice dropped an octave lower as I took a deep breath, preparing to give one last push to solidify this lie of mine.
"Yet, one stood out, above all. A land that exists far, far away. A warm place where no harm canst reach us. There, even we canst liveth in peace. A place where we doth not need to fear or starve."
"What… is that 'lace called?" she asked, her voice trembling.
I bit my lips, knowing what I was doing was unacceptable. I was giving her false hope.
There was no land of peace or warmth; no such thing existed. Beyond was a world rife with violence and cruelty, which took the hopeful and mercilessly crushed them.
It held no love–not for anyone, even those it had seemingly blessed, and especially not for us.
Even so, I had to commit to this lie.
"A land… called Vinland."
As I beheld her gaze, I saw in her eyes–an undeniable spark.
A spark of hope… hope for a brighter future.
"Vinland…" she muttered, lost in her own thoughts, mulling over what she'd heard.
It was enough that she had started pondering the idea of leaving this place. Pushing any more would do more harm than good.
With Godwyn's birth, my dad should still be present in the Capital. That should deter the Order's fanatics from acting rashly.
Although I have no idea when exactly the Omenkiller raids started in the game, his presence alone should buy us time–time I could use to prepare.
There are many things I have to do–getting stronger, finding a way to break the seal and escape the clutches of the Golden Order, all while making sure we don't die.
To that end, instilling in her the idea of leaving the underground is just the first step.
"Just think over it. I doth not expect an answer immediately," I broke her line of thought, easing off the pressure.
She let out an affirming hum in response, picking up pace as we continued our trek back to the Shunning Grounds.
X – X – X – X – X – X
The rest of the walk back was uneventful, with little to no conversation. Yet, the silence was much more bearable than before.
My sister was mainly occupied with ensuring a clear path, but I caught her getting lost in thought a few times. I made sure to cover for her when she wasn't concentrating since I had an ability that let me scout out my surroundings more effectively.
Once we returned, we stopped by Gordon's place for a quick greeting. That was what we did every time we returned from the sewers; it had become a routine.
Stepping inside his room, we were greeted with an unusual sight. Gordon was there as always, but another Omen was present this time.
Hoisting a crudely made axe on his shoulder, he stood over a head taller than Gordon, with horns jutting out from most of his body, like any other Omen. His upper half was bare, without anything covering it, while a sheet of cloth was tied around his waist that went down to his knees. He was barefooted, just like the rest of us.
He seemed to be conversing with Gordon using… grunts and hand-motions? What's up with that? Is he mute?
Mehg stepped forward and tried calling out to him, "Gordon, we–"
Smash!
Her eyes words were cut short, and her eyes widened as I roughly grabbed her and pulled her aside swiftly, wrapping both arms around her right before something crashed right where she stood moments ago, kicking up some dust.
I moved quickly, checking on Mehg and making sure she was alright. It didn't look like she was hurt, but she looked shaken, her eyes staring at where she'd just been.
"What the hell?!" Gordon screamed, quickly grabbing his cane as he hobbled over to us. "You kids alright?"
"We art fine…" I replied, getting my beating heart under control. My gaze moved, landing on the spot where Mehg stood before, replaced by an axe lodged in the ground.
I then turned towards the only other presence beside us–the Omen stood with his legs slightly apart, his torso leaning forward, and one arm outstretched in a throwing stance–the same one he'd been gripping the axe with.
If I hadn't reacted in time…
"Hey," I called out to him, my voice eerily calm, "You better have a damn good excuse for this. Otherwise, I'm gonna tear you a new one."
Hearing my threat, the Omen only responded with a slight raise of his eyebrow as if daring me to make good on my threat.
This little…
After almost killing my sister, he doesn't even look ashamed, not one bit!
Hitting an {Observe} at him, I could feel a bead of sweat slide down my temple as I read his stats, my anger slowly giving way to nervousness.
{ – Observe – }
{Name: Garm}
{Race: Omen}
{Level: 22}
{Title: None}
{Class: Warrior}
{HP: 4500/4500}
{MP: 220/220}
{SP: 460/460}
Well… shit. How the hell am I supposed to beat this guy?
Should I try to catch him off-guard?
[If I may interject, it is not wise to fight him, at least not at your current level, given your current capabilities. While he is the one who instigated this confrontation, retaliating could bring you significant harm due to the pact established in this place.]
I know that! I know… but what he did, I can't just let it slide–
Thwack!
Lost in my own thoughts, I was brought out of my musings by the sound of something being struck.
Right in front of my eyes, the Omen was holding his head in pain, glaring at Gordon as he supported himself with his staff while holding a wooden club with his other hand.
While I was distracted, he made his over to Garm and struck him on the head hard enough with the club to create some bruising.
"What do you think you're doin', you utter buffoon?!" he asked loudly, "Are you tryin' to get yourself kicked out?!"
His words caused Garm to freeze as he considered the consequences of his actions. Letting out an annoyed sigh, he began walking over to us, and I tensed up, ready to react if he tried to pull anything.
Not that I'm any confident in being able to fight him off.
Once he was close enough, he didn't stop his strides and walked past us, right towards the weapon he'd thrown at Mehg.
Wordlessly, he picked it up with ease and left the room.
We all stood in collective silence for a moment before Gordon cleared his throat and spoke up first, "Uhm, sorry you had to go through that."
"Why are you sorry?" I reprimanded him in a frustrated tone. "You did nothing wrong."
"Considerin' how stubborn and prideful that guy is, the world would end before he musters out a simple sorry," he sighed, his words laced with exasperation. "So, I guess I'm just apologizin' in his place."
"Then don't. Don't apologize because of him. His actions are his own, and he should suffer the consequences," I grumbled angrily, infuriated by what had happened.
He didn't even have the decency to apologize before leaving, as he was entirely in the wrong.
"Tis 'ine." Mehg piped up beside me. It looked like she had snapped out of her shocked state and no longer looked frazzled. In fact, she seemed completely calm, as if the event prior had never happened.
"How doth thou feel, sister?" I asked, honestly feeling concerned for her.
She just went through a near-death experience, and I knew that it would end up leaving a scar on her, no matter how small.
"I 'eel… shaken. Hath thou not 'ulled 'e aside… I a' sure I wouldst hath survived it naught," she said, her voice cracking briefly.
Without any hesitation, I pulled her close, wrapping my arms around her as I embraced her tightly. She stiffened momentarily before reciprocating the hug, resting her head in the crook of my neck.
"Tis not fine," I said quietly, gently rubbing circles on her back, "I almost lost thee. Hadst thou died, I know not what I wouldst do in grief."
She was completely silent. I didn't hear any crying or feel her damp tears wetting my robe, but although imperceptibly, I could feel her body trembling.
As I consoled her, I felt something deep in my gut slowly building up. An emotion akin to anger but far more potent.
It was rage.
But strangely, I couldn't pinpoint the reason for that emotion.
I know it wasn't directed toward that Omen because I was already seething at him moments prior.
And I know it wasn't directed at Gordon either because while I did feel irritated at him for apologizing on that asshole's behalf, there's just no reason for me to feel this… boiling rage.
The more I thought about it, the more the rage built up. I took a few deep breaths, trying to calm myself, as getting angrier wouldn't help the situation.
But it just didn't work.
It kept rising like boiling water pushing outwards as it tried to escape its container, even though I put a lid on it.
"I… a' sorry, 'rother. This only ha'ened 'ecause I was not strong enough."
Her words were only fuel to the fire, and I finally realized the source of my smoldering rage.
It wasn't because of Garm, Gordon, or anyone else.
The rage… was directed at myself.
At my hopeless, helpless self, who could do nothing in the face of a strong opponent.
Even though I've fought strong enemies before, I was able to come out on top because they weren't that stronger than me.
But this time… this time was different. I was completely and utterly outmatched.
No matter how much I deluded myself, the truth is that if I had fought Garm, he would have completely wiped the floor with me, {Skills} or no {Skills}.
The difference between us was just that big.
Man, this fucking sucks.
[...]
Not gonna say anything this time?
[My apologies, but there is not much I can say. I believe you already know what must be done, don't you?]
Yeah… there's only one path I can choose.
I pulled up the available dungeons, of which only one was actually available, while every other one was locked behind the Level requirements.
If I'm outmatched, I just gotta climb up to my opponent's Level. For that, I'll gladly risk my life over and over again…
[...]
Tightening my arms around my sister and feeling her warmth, my resolve only hardened further.
This feeling of helplessness–this is the first and last time I'll experience it.
So that no one, not Marika, the Elden Beast, or even the Greater Will, can force me through such a thing… ever again.