Dungeons Are Bad Business

The Maluw house was a massive edifice of pitted gray stone, with a tower on each corner that overlooked the family's ample gardens. They were connected by thin wooden bridges, though Vee couldn't imagine such structures ever seeing much use.

As he approached the building, Vee looked around at the contents of the gardens, seeing several of the flowers that Kai had been planting in Westown in full bloom along with others he didn't recognize. The beds were well-maintained, and there were several marble benches throughout the yard for anyone who wanted to stop and admire a specific display for some time.

However, the grounds weren't only dedicated to beauty. Several of them looked like they had a far more practical purpose, with wooden man posts and other types of training dummies arranged in different patterns. There were also vast sandboxes that were home to various obstacle courses.

Peculiar decorations for a family of [Enchanters], Vee thought, but those weren't the only strange bit of decoration. Up on top of the roof of the house was a group of weathered gargoyles in menacing poses; they stood guard around the roof's perimeter and scowled down at the world below. Looking at one, which carried a menacing spear, Vee wondered if they were capable of coming to life like the ones back in the Bardis Gargoyle District were said to be or if they were purely decorative.

Filing that question away to ask Hanako later, Vee made his way to the great oak door and knocked three times. He waited for a moment, hearing no sound coming from within, and was about to raise his fist to knock again when the door slid open.

Staring at him from inside was an older, severe-looking woman with bright blue eyes and tightly braided gray hair. She neither scowled nor smiled at Vee as she stepped out, and her voice was perfectly even when she spoke.

"Good morning, sir. Might I inquire as to your identity and the nature of your business?

"I'm Vee Vales, [Dungeon Master] of Crestheart. I don't necessarily have any business; I was just wondering if Hanako was home yet."

The woman's expression softened somewhat. "Ah, Mister Vales. I apologize for not recognizing you; I'm afraid that my duties tend to keep me rather cooped up here. I am Janna, the [Head Maid] for the Maluw family. As to your question, I'm afraid that the Master and his family haven't yet returned from their trip. There was some sort of disturbance in Bardis during the young lady's gala performance, and they extended their vacation as a result. According to the master's last letter, they were going to spend a few days in Amespool, though I'm expecting that they'll be back in the next week or two. Is there a message you'd like me to give to the young lady when she returns?"

"Not really. I'm sure I'll see her soon enough after she returns, but thank you for the information," Vee said, bowing his head slightly. Darn. He'd been hoping for a quicker return date, but a week or two wasn't all that long in the grand scheme of things. Or at least, he hoped it wouldn't prove to be. Maybe it'd be wise to start looking into other restaurant-enabling options in the meantime – check the pawn shop or something – just to be on the safe side.

Before he left, Vee had one more question.

"Out of curiosity, do you know what manner of disturbance there was in Bardis? That's where I'm from originally, you see."

Janna's eyebrows tightened. "Some fool [Phantom Thief] stole a painting during the gala, among other //Unique// items. According to the master, the local [Lawkeepers] were still working to capture him and put a stop to his crimes."

Vee whistled. The Bardis [Lawkeepers] were pretty competent, all things considered, so the [Phantom Thief] must have had some real skills if he'd managed to steal multiple //Unique// items without getting caught.

"I see. Thank you again, Janna. Have a nice day."

"You as well, Mister Vales."

Turning around, Vee left the Maluw residence.

Though he was tempted to head straight back to Westown to help clear out the remaining buildings on the strip, Vee had agreed with Reginald's suggestion the night before that his time would be better spent if he went and sounded out a few of his prospective tenants to see if they were even interested. That way, he could mentally update his plans accordingly.

Up first was Torres, the [Stationer] who made guides for Crestheart and – presumably – other things for other clients. To tell the truth, Vee wasn't entirely sure how the man spent most of his time.

With the help of hazy memories from other times he'd gone to visit the man, Vee maneuvered his way through several blocks of Northtown until he reached the large residential area that Torres called home. Thankfully, it wasn't hard to find the [Stationer]'s house – it was garishly painted and stood out like a sore thumb from the other buildings around it.

Here too Vee knocked, and he was greeted by a stream of cursing that was oddly poetic. A moment later, Torres threw the door open, his eyes blazing.

"What could possibly be so important to bother a man at this ungodly hour?" he demanded, adjusting the belt of his violently pink bathrobe.

Vee slowly blinked several times. "It's…nearly noon, Mister Torres."

"It's nearly noon," Torres said in a cruel mimic of Vee's voice, sneering. "Yes indeed, Mister Vales, I have a clock and know how to read it. Allow me to ask you: so what? If a man chooses to sleep until mid-afternoon on his day off, that's his Gawain-given right. What do you want?"

Feeling oddly put out – how was he supposed to know it was Torres' day off? Did the man really sleep until mid-afternoon? – Vee cast his thoughts around for what to say next.

"Well, I'm sorry to have bothered you," he said. "But there's an opportunity in Westown that I think you might be interested in."

"Oho? And what might that be?"

Vee explained his plan for the Westown Strip – or at least the part of it that was relevant here: that he had space available – and asked if Torres was interested in setting up shop.

"There's plenty of space for you to have a workshop," the [Dungeon Master] said. "I don't know if you make your own paper, but there's probably enough space for you to do that too."

Torres reached up, stroking his mustache as he gave it some thought.

"Well, that's an intriguing proposition," he finally said. "And I would be lying if I said that I hadn't often dreamt of a proper papercraft atelier. However, I have substantial questions, the first of which is how big is it?"

"We've got a bunch of options. The smallest is around a thousand square feet, and the biggest is nearly five thousand. Of course, there's plenty of buildings between those two extremes."

"That leads perfectly to my second question: how much would a middle-sized space cost? Say something around two thousand square feet?"

"How much do you think would be fair?"

The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

"Fairness is, in my experience, rarely a consideration when it comes to rent."

Vee shrugged. "That's true, but there are… I suppose you could call them extenuating circumstances here, so fairness is indeed a consideration."

"Extenuating circumstances, eh? Well, in that case, I'd like to pay nothing."

Vee shook his head. "You and I both know that's not a reasonable number."

"Indeed. However, it is not the tenant's job to offer up his head on a platter, regardless of the circumstances of his prospective landlord. As such, I'll ask again, how much would such a building cost me to possess and operate?"

Vee had done a bit of number crunching with Alforde and Reginald the night before, so while he would have preferred Torres to make the initial offer he had a number in mind that would actually work. "We're looking at starting at three gold fleurs a month."

"That's…somewhat steep. Papermaking isn't the most lucrative of businesses you know. I think I'd much prefer some sort of arrangement that was based on my revenue. At least for the first few months until I see that the expansion is worth making permanently. Say…twenty-five percent?"

Vee rubbed his chin, resisting the urge to immediately accept that had bubbled up inside his stomach and doing his best to make it look like he was seriously considering the offer.

Truth be told, getting occupancy in the Westown strip was the [Dungeon Master]'s primary goal, so the money didn't really matter all that much to him. Had he been left to his own devices, Vee probably would have accepted Torres' first offer of zero, but Reginald had insisted – and Vee had agreed – on working with realistic numbers that would scale. Appearances were important, after all, and there was definitely a world where the Westown rents became a substantial source of revenue. Heck, depending on how big the district ended up growing, it was even possible that it would eclipse Crestheart's earning potential. Of course, such a thing was a long, long way away, but that was neither here nor there.

"I think I'd feel more comfortable with thirty percent," Vee said purely for the purposes of bargaining. When he saw the way Torres frowned at his counteroffer, he amended it. "Up to three gold fleurs per month, of course."

The [Stationer] shifted his weight back and forth. "Twenty six."

"Thirty."

"Twenty-eight."

"No. Too annoying to keep track of. It's thirty or nothing."

"Well you're hardly any fun, Mister Vales. Still, that's a tempting offer. There are definitely some projects I've been putting off on account of space limitations. Allow me some time to think about it. I assure you, I'll give you my answer by the end of the week."

[Bargaining +1!]

Dismissing the notification, Vee nodded. "That's fine. Have a nice day."

Torres muttered something that Vee didn't hear, and after the door was shut – somewhat haughtily, he thought – the [Dungeon Master] turned around and headed back the way he'd come.

The next stop on his list was his last for the day: Brice Gilbert, the [Toymaker]. Vee had set things up that way for two reasons. The first was that the man's workshop was the closest to the boarding house, so he could simply head straight back when his business was done, and the second – admittedly more compelling – reason was that he'd wanted to have an open schedule if Brice ended up wanting to discuss the dunpla venture.

Dunpla, dunpla, dunpla. The little figurines had ended up being far more popular than Vee would have ever expected, with their stock – including some refreshment on Brice's part – completely selling out during the circuit.

As they rebuilt their supply, Vee wanted to see what the [Toymaker] thought about expanding the line to include other designs. There were all sorts of monsters that could be found inside of dungeons, even if they weren't currently in Crestheart. Heck, they could also expand their operation to make miniature versions of other dungeons. He idly wondered if any of the other [Dungeon Masters] from the Dungeons of the Future circuit would be interested; Zeiken had led him to believe that at least three of them were relatively well off financially.

That was a lead worth following up on, and Vee filed it away for later.

Additionally, regardless of what they made, there were other logistical concerns to think about for expanding the venture. Packaging, shipping, things of that nature. Vee wasn't entirely sure that Brice would have many answers about those type of things, but it never hurt to ask. Beyond that, Vee wasn't even entirely sure that the dunpla was a good use of his time and energy. It was an apparently lucrative product, there was no doubt about that, but being stretched too thin was a well-worn cause for concern in business and there was no doubt that the [Dungeon Master] was already starting to feel a bit over-extended. The dungeon wouldn't be closed forever, and when it re-opened he doubted he'd have time to juggle so many different business ventures.

A little voice in the back of his mind – or maybe a whisper from the dragon on his shoulder? – told him that he'd have to start more aggressively finding ways to delegate some of his responsibilities. There were only so many hours in the day, it warned him, and his plate was already rather full of things that required his attention.

Ignoring the voice – and hoping that doing so wasn't a harbinger of bad things to come – Vee quickened his pace and made his way over to the little toy store.

Vee Vales

Primary Class: Ghost Smith (Self), Level 10

Secondary Class: Dungeon Master (Oar's Crest), Level 25

Tertiary Class: Guy-Who-Takes-Things-WAY-Too-Far (Self), Level 8

Might: 18

Wit: 42

Faith: 25

Adventurousness: 7

Ambition: 16

Plotting: 22

Charisma: 18

Devious Mind: 30

Leadership: 22

Guts: 16

Intimidating Presence: 11

Citizenship: 25

Public Relations: 8

Determination: 7

Persuasiveness: 6

Bargaining: 6 (+1)

Patience: 4

Competitive Spirit: 1

Pragmatism: 1

<3<3 Infatuation <3<3

Alforde Armorsoul:

Primary Class: Hammer Specialist (Self), Level 6

Secondary Class: Right-hand man (Vee Vales), Level 20 (+1)

Tertiary Class: Dungeon Champion (Oar's Crest), Level 18

Additional Class: Glaciernaut (Sacha Silverblade), Level 13

Might: 61

Wit: 16

Faith: 27

Adventurousness (Bound – Vee Vales): 9

Endurance: 36

Intimidating Presence: 16

Heart of a Champion: 15

Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 10

Vigilance: 11

Vanity: 2

Single-Mindedness: 1

Reginald:

Primary Class: Core Spirit (Unknown), Level ???

#$&Q#$)(@#$#@#$%!@#$##%#%()@#$**@@##

Secondary Class: Loudmouth (Self), Level 43

Tertiary Class: Majordomo (Vee Vales), Level 21

Additional Class: Announcer (Vee Vales), Level 14

Additional Class: Hyperthymesiac (Self), Level 5

Might: 2

Wit: 38

Faith: 17

Ambition: 29

Greed: 24

Deceptiveness: 28

Manipulativeness: 42

$#&*!@!!: !!!

Loyalty: 48

Patience: 11

Irritability: 27 (+1)

Remorsefulness: 17

Expository Prowess: 23

Pragmatism: #@$%@$

Hop@#!! @#$@!@#

@#$@%%^

#4^5#*&_!+++#(@$#

Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 10