Chapter 356: I Don't Want To Be A Burden
Aisha thought that after giving him that deep kiss, Cassius would finally let go of his sulking and answer her. Instead, his eyes softened, a faint smile tugging at his lips as he reached up and stroked her hair.
The tenderness of the gesture startled her, but she didn't pull away, if anything, she leaned into his touch like a contented cat, her small ears twitching from how soothing it felt.
"It seems my little kitten has really grown."
Cassius finally murmured fondly, brushing his fingers through her dark strands.
"Usually, I'm the one stealing kisses from you, sneaking them when you least expect it. And usually, you're far too shy to do more than pout or scold me."
"But tonight...you were the one to start it. You kissed me, boldly. And after starting it, you went wild, like you always do, clinging and kissing like you never want to stop."
Her cheeks turned pink at his teasing observation, but she raised her chin proudly, folding her arms across her small chest.
"Of course, Cassius! I can't stay the same forever, can I? I'm also a grown women as well. I can take the lead sometimes too!" Her voice was firm, but her flushed face betrayed her embarrassment.
Cassius chuckled low in his throat, his gaze warm, while Aisha's pride softened into something gentler as she reached down to stroke his cheek in return.
"And besides…" She whispered, her tone shifting into something tender. "You looked so cute a moment ago. When you were pouting like that, sulking with that childish face...I couldn't resist."
"You reminded me of a little boy from the orphanage, so innocent and pouty. A motherly instinct came over me and I just wanted to coddle you, to kiss you and soothe you."
Cassius laughed under his breath at that, but his eyes glinted mischievously as they dropped to her bare chest, her petite frame glowing faintly in the firelight.
"A motherly instinct, you say?" His lips curved wickedly. "Hard to believe when I see...this." He poked one finger against her tiny breast, smirking. "With a chest that flat, Aisha, even if you become a mother, your own children won't recognize you. They'll think you're their sister at best."
The words hit her like a slap, and her smile fell. Her lip trembled as she whispered, "Cassius...but you told me before you didn't mind. You said you liked me just as I am...Even though I'm flat and small…"
Her voice cracked with hurt, and she looked away, her pride shaken.
And seeing her actually being hurt by his joke, Cassius sat up slightly, hands reaching for her. His fingers cupped her tiny breasts, kneading them gently, squeezing until her nipples stiffened against his palms.
"What are you saying, Aisha?" He said firmly, his tone unshakable. "Of course I love them. Look at them, they're like perfect little jewels." His thumbs rolled her pink tips, tugging them until she gasped softly. "They shine for me alone. So small, so delicate, but so damn beautiful...I wouldn't trade them for anything."
His praise, spoken while his hands caressed her chest with deliberate care, soothed the ache in her heart. But doubt still lingered in her eyes as she whispered.
"But...what about our children?" Her voice was timid, but the slip of "our" was unconscious, as if she had already chosen him to be the father of her future children. "If my chest is this small, they won't respect me as their mother."
"How can I demand respect from them when there's nothing here? What am I supposed to do, Cassius? Tell me?! What if they don't see me as their mother at all?!"
Cassius only smiled at her worry, one hand slipping lower until his fingers brushed the fragile folds of her pussy between her thighs. His touch was feather-light, but even that made her whole body jolt, heat rushing to her face.
"You're overthinking, little kitten." He said softly, stroking her tiny slit as though it were the most delicate treasure. "Once I've filled this little thing, so tight and fragile it scares me to even press here, you'll surely get pregnant."
"And once you're carrying my child, your body will change on its own. Breasts that leak milk, swelling for our babies...and then no one will question you. They'll know you're their mother."
Her heart fluttered wildly, images of cradling their children flashing through her mind. She blushed furiously, but a shy, dreamy smile curved her lips. She could already imagine it, Cassius by her side, her chest full, feeding their children.
But Cassius wasn't done. With a playful growl, he pulled her closer until her small chest was pressed against his face. He nuzzled into her soft skin, kissing one stiff peak before sucking on it with greedy vigor.
"Lick!♡~ Mmph!♡~ Ahh!♡~ Suck!♡~"
"But don't think I'll let them have it all." He mumbled against her breast, tugging on her nipple with his lips. "I'm a hungry man too. Your milk will be mine as well. I won't give in, even to our children."
"Cassius, no, you can't! That's for our babies, not for you!" Her laughter rang out in breathless giggles, her hands tangled in his hair as she tried to push him away.
But he simply moved to her other breast, lips fastening around her other nipple, sucking noisily until she whimpered.
"It's fine." He said between licks, grinning up at her. "That's why you have two, isn't it? One for the baby...and one for me."
Her protests melted into helpless moans, her body trembling under the teasing suction. She looked down at him with wide, limpid eyes, whispering shakily.
"But if you do it like this...if you drink it all...I'll run out of milk, and my chest will shrink again…"
Cassius smirked against her breast, looking up at her with lustful eyes.
"Then I'll just have to fill your belly again, won't I? Make you pregnant as many times as it takes to keep these perfect little breasts swollen."
He squeezed her hips possessively, voice low and rough.
"Would you mind that, Aisha? Would you mind carrying a whole litter of my children?"
Her eyes softened, her lips parting as she leaned down, overwhelmed by the intensity of his words.
"Mind? That's exactly what I dream of every day…"
She whispered, before lowering herself after being unable to hold herself back and capturing his lips in a slow, passionate kiss.
"Kiss!♡~ Kiss!♡~ Mwah!♡~ Kiss!♡~ Nibble!♡~"
A kiss that sealed not just the moment, but a promise of a future, her life, her body, her children, all bound to him.
Aisha then broke the kiss with a lingering sigh, her breath still mingling with his as she rested against his chest. Her expression softened into something teasing, her lashes fluttering as she looked down at him with playful insistence.
"Now tell me, Cassius. I've done enough to make you less angry, haven't I? So what exactly were you so upset about? You keep saying you're angry with me, but I honestly don't know what you're talking about. Tell me."
Cassius let out a long sigh, his expression softening as his hand brushed idly down her hair.
"I'm not exactly angry with you, Aisha." He admitted. "Just...frustrated and vexed, I guess."
That made her blink in surprise. Tilting her head, ears twitching at the word, she asked curiously.
"Frustrated? About what?"
His gaze lifted, his eyes catching hers with a steady light. "About being left out."
"Left out…?" Aisha echoed, still confused. "I don't remember leaving you out of anything? What are you talking about? Speak clearly, Cassius."
He frowned, his lips pressing together for a moment before he finally spoke.
"I'm talking about your orphanage, Aisha."
Her eyes widened slightly at the unexpected answer.
"I heard from Julie already." He went on, his voice low but firm. "She told me you come from one of the larger orphanages in town. A place stuffed with more children than it should hold, with barely enough food and clothing to go around."
"Because of that, you've been breaking your back to keep it alive. I know you've been going out of your way to scrape together coin, like asking those merchants for help after saving them, funneling your own salary straight back into the orphanage, even leaning on your brigade from time to time to donate."
"...Don't look so surprised." He added, stroking her cheek with a thumb.
"I know everything. And I think it's admirable. Truly, Aisha, it makes me proud of you."
Her lips parted, pride flickering in her chest at hearing that from him. She almost smiled. But then his expression darkened, a faint crease appearing at his brow.
"But what makes me angry..." He said, his tone shifting. "...is that you kept me out of all of it. Not a word, not a hint, not even once did you come to me."
Aisha's lips pursed; she looked away, uncertain.
"At first, I thought maybe you just didn't have the opportunity to bring it up. But even today, while we were riding, I kept giving you chances. I brought up your orphanage again and again, hinted about funding, about support."
"And every single time...you ignored me. Like my help didn't matter. Like I wasn't someone you could trust with it."
A somber look flickered across Aisha's face, her lips parting as the weight of his words settled. She lowered her eyes, guilt beginning to stir in her chest.
"Why?" Cassius's voice softened, but it carried more force. "Why is it you'll go out of your way to ask everyone else for help? You'll give up your own pay, threatenmerchants, rally others...but not me."
"Even when I practically hand you the chance, you turn away...What is it, Aisha? Why am I the only one you won't ask?"
Aisha froze. The air between them thickened, heavy with the truth she had tried so hard to avoid.
For a long moment, she couldn't speak at all. But the way Cassius looked at her, with that mixture of affection, curiosity, and longing for honesty, made it impossible to keep dodging.
"It's true, Cassius." Her hands trembled slightly as she clutched at his shoulders, her voice quiet, timid. "I've been doing everything I can to keep the orphanage afloat. And yes...I did think about asking you. More than once, even. But...I couldn't."
Cassius's brows furrowed. "Couldn't? Why not?"
"Because..." She bit her lip, her words spilling out haltingly, as if confessing a guilty secret. "We only just started this...us. And I thought...if I asked you for money now, right at the beginning, how would it look?"
"Think about it, Cassius. If someone got into a relationship and, right away, started asking for money, wouldn't anyone think they had ulterior motives? That they weren't in it for love, but for money?"
Cassius's frown deepened, almost offended.
"So what, you think I'd see you as some woman after my wealth? Do you really think my love for you is that weak?"
Her heart clenched.
"No! No, not at all!" She blurted, her arms tightening around him as she hugged him close. "I know how much you love me. You've shown it more than once. I don't doubt it, not even for a moment."
She pulled back slightly, cheeks flushed, voice softer now.
"It's just...I don't know how to ask you. Not without feeling like it would taint everything between us. It's...it's a weird feeling. One I can't explain properly. But I just...I couldn't do it."
She then let out a shaky little laugh, a wry smile tugging at her lips.
"Besides...most of my life revolves around that orphanage. I grew up there. It's where I became who I am. I owe everything to it. So of course, I devote all my time and effort to keeping it running."
"But...that also means I'm not free. I can't be like your other wives, who can stay by your side all the time. I have my own duty, my own burden. And I didn't want you to see me as someone weighed down, someone less appealing because of it."
Her voice softened to a whisper, almost fragile.
"That's why I avoided the topic. I didn't want you to think of me as less. I didn't want you to think of me as...a burden, who would prioritise something else over him."
Her voice trailed into silence, her confession hanging in the air like a fragile thread and Cassius watched her quietly, the sharpness in his eyes dimming into something thoughtful, something understanding.
At first, Cassius felt angsty, stung by being left out and ignored. But as Aisha's confession spilled out, her fears, her worry that he might see her as less for not always being at his side, his frustration unraveled.
His thumb slowed against her waist, his gaze softening. She hadn't shut him out because she didn't care, but because she cared too much, and that realization made his heart ache and soften all at once...