Damned Healer

A whole year went by.

Every single day, Darian moved nonstop searching for resources and enemies. He went through all kinds of biomes and regions, yet he still felt like he hadn't even seen half of the uninhabited land out there.

He easily found lots of herbs, ores, and a few hundred shadows, plus some idiots who tried to rob him.

Even after absorbing all the primordial cores, he never got any evolution notification.

But that day, after absorbing an herb with pure primordial power, a green screen popped up in front of him.

[Current Status: Dark Saint]

[Primordial Points for the next realm: 1,000/10,000]

[Level 1 Reached]

[Reward: +1 Random Upgrade]

[UP] [Wind Law +11]

During that time, Darian absorbed the shadows' essence every day. He failed a lot, but he managed to push almost all his Laws to +10, except Almighty Law, which stayed stuck at +3.

But he couldn't get past +10 — the success rate was way too low. Now, with each level up, he could finally push further.

Darian looked at the notification, but felt no joy. Because… a whole year had gone by, and he'd only gotten a thousand points.

The reason was obvious. The strongest powers of this world occupied only two-thirds of the land, but those were the best areas, overflowing with resources.

The wild region got stuck with scraps, not even 10% of what the rest had.

He let out a dry snort. At this pace, with each level getting harder, it would take him a decade at best to reach his goal.

But he'd already been away from home for almost six years. He kept asking himself what mattered more… revenge, or going back to his family.

The answer was obvious. Joining a sect would be the fastest way to get what he wanted and return home… but he didn't want that.

Back at the start, in the Wild World, he'd been driven by rage and denial. But soon after, that was swallowed up by his obsession with revenge.

And yet, after more than a year…

He felt like the biggest trash in existence. He was sure that being around people would only bring him even more pain.

Every day, he remembered his failure and Awel's last words. Those three didn't deserve that fate. They'd only lived six years, they were pure, and they trusted him completely… but because of him, they ceased to exist.

So, he accepted he'd stay alone from now on. But… Niara, Lucy, and Lucius were waiting for him. Was it really worth making them wait this long?

When he saved Remira, before leaving, she had given him a small blue stone with her mark on it. That would make everyone recognize her, and it would allow him to enter her powerful sect.

He just had to go find her. The path had always been open, right in front of him.

Darian was stuck in that inner conflict, sitting on top of a mountain while watching the huge full moon hanging in the sky.

But inside his soul, he could feel his spiritual meridians twisting and changing.

...

It took hours until they finally stabilized.

He took a deep breath, focusing on the changes. Just like the system had warned: after a thousand points, he leveled up and his meridians got stronger.

As he breathed deeply…

Darian felt his soul pulse with a new kind of power. He focused his vision far away and suddenly saw another mountain in the distance, in insane detail.

He could count the stones and describe their exact shapes. If there was an ant there, he'd see it. He could also feel all the energies and fluctuations of that mountain.

His physical senses, his energy senses, and his instincts had become razor sharp. The power of chaos had fused with his soul, turning him into something way beyond the average.

He was already a Spiritual Guardian, with his power concentrated at the center of his soul's forehead. Now, he was going through a new awakening. But it was only the beginning.

It should've been a moment of excitement, but… his mind was still broken, trapped in the conflict about what he was really supposed to do.

Darian let out a long, heavy sigh, his eyes fixed on the full moon dominating the sky.

He felt like a dried-up well, an empty hollow that got deeper every day. For a whole year, the silence in his soul echoed the deaths of the three kids, a constant reminder of his failure.

So he started testing his new senses, trying to fill that void with anything. And then he felt it.

"!"

His eyes jumped. He felt something that shouldn't even be possible.

It was very, very far away. More precisely, outside this closed world he was trapped in.

Through the connection they had... because of the recent changes in his soul...

"Niara"

He could actually feel her. They were apart, but still in the same universe. Even so, before it had been totally impossible to notice her.

It was still pretty subtle. But... he could sense a bit of what she was feeling.

It was like sending a silent signal to her. When it reached her, he left a little of himself there, then came back, bringing a bit of her with him.

The moment he felt her, she noticed him too.

A wave of euphoria and pure joy hit him. It wasn't his — it was hers. An overwhelming happiness, excitement and a longing to see him so big he couldn't measure it.

It was the opposite of the emptiness he'd felt for so long; it shocked him and made him tremble.

They couldn't see each other or speak, they just exchanged feelings subtly. Still... it was really strong.

But it lasted only a few seconds. Her joy was quickly replaced by terrible anguish.

Of course, she felt what Darian was hiding: the raw pain, the suffocating guilt, and the hatred eating him from the inside.

Darian clenched his fists tight, feeling the distress coming from her. Then it turned into a mix of desperation and a frantic need to help, to reach him and pull him out of that state. For her, it was unbearable to see him so broken and be powerless.

He breathed deep, his eyes shaking...

Then...

Something new hit him.

It was a new sensation, a warmth spreading through his chest. It felt like his soul — a barren desert — was being watered.

In that desert, grass began to grow, life started to bloom.

"…what is this?" he murmured, voice trembling.

He knew the answer.

It wasn't a power. It wasn't anything magical... just a pure feeling.

He could only pick up a faint trace from her, but it was enough. That nourishment, born from her love and worry, filled him, washing his pain away.

"I'm sorry... I won't be long," he whispered, breathing deep.

Everything changed in an instant. Darian soon felt happiness and excitement coming from Niara.

He smiled faintly... feeling the indescribable value of getting that. Even after all these years apart, nothing had changed. Actually... it seemed like he and she felt something even stronger now.

His heart, long inert, started racing. Like an engine coming back to life, pumping life again.

"I'll never forgive myself for letting them die..."

He murmured, breathing deep...

The image of those three and everything they'd lived flashed through his mind again. But this time, he wasn't afraid to face it.

Until... he hiccupped, and the tears finally came.

They were torrents, like a dam that had broken. In those tears, frustration, guilt, and hatred poured out of his body.

Slowly, he felt lighter, calmer.

He wasn't omniscient. He'd done the best he could and saved many. Looking inward, Darian realized he didn't regret what he'd done. He'd do it all again.

Running away, brooding forever, or letting hatred consume him wasn't the solution.

He clenched his fists with new determination. Not everything could be predicted, but one day...

...he'd be strong enough so tragedies like that wouldn't happen again.

He breathed deep, feeling renewed. Then he felt Niara's subtle sense of satisfaction, like a small "well done."

He stood up slowly, then looked up.

"Wait for me. I'll finish that bastard and get through this damn Trial soon."