Crownsmith Chronicles

Dalgren was the next to challenge Key, and the game they played was equally childish, if not worse. The piece of paper Key drew read, "Clean the Trough," which consequently used the buckets and the wooden ships from the previous round. The goal was to scoop your ship and only your ship out of the empty water trough. The exploit, it turned out, was that the rules did not specify that you needed to actually use the bucket, even though it was heavily implied. Key lost again as Dalgren easily removed his ship with a ladle.

The buckets were used a third time when Key drew "Collect the spoons." The rules were simple, put a bunch of spoons in the bucket, dump them all out, and whoever collected more of them won. Key had specified that the spoons had to be dumped on the ground and not directly into someone's outstretched hand. He also added a rule that you had to pick up your own spoons, and everyone else had to stand back a good distance.

Allister shouted, "Now you get it!"

This gave Key a jolt of happiness, which was soon quelled when the game started; Dalgren challenged him before the spoons were dumped out. When Key declined, Dalgren held out his mug with the freshly imprinted key and asked for a refill of water. Key argued, but ultimately, he hadn't declared that no one could challenge him in the middle of a challenge. And so, as soon as he left to refill Dalgren's mug with the horse's water, he heard the distinct sound of spoons pouring out onto the ground. He had already lost again.

His next challenge went a little better, depending on how you looked at it. He drew "Nursery Rhyme Performance." The rules, after Key was finished elaborating, were pretty extensive. Before you could vote, you had to take an oath that you were voting for the best performance and not for any other reason. Next, there could be no interruptions; this included other challenges, jeering, or the like. Everyone had to be absolutely silent, and there could be no distractions of any kind.

With the rules agreed on, Key took center stage and performed the first children's song he could think of. Everyone knew eyes, ears, and nose. It was a nursery rhyme classic. It involved pointing to the different parts of the face and explaining that his eyes could see, his nose could smell, and that someone was a big fat stink.

By the end of the performance, everyone laughed and cheered. It was a little embarrassing, but he did what he had to. It turned out that his challenger had no intention of competing. He just walked to the center of the stage and told everyone to give it up one more time for the "Widdow baby winner." That's how Key collected the first brand on his cup.

He got his second brand from Allister, however, not because Allister was going easy on him. The game "Dinner Bell" involved tying a rabbit to a pole with a long string. On top of the pole, there was a bell. The first rabbit to ring the bell won. Key came up rule after rule until there was no chance that the game could possibly be rigged in any way for either of them.

Each string had to be the same length, there could be no knots that intentionally shorten the string, there could be no outside involvement, no touching, throwing, and on and on the list went until someone said, "We get it already."

Allister lost, but not because he picked a slower rabbit. It was because he picked a male one, and Key had picked a female. The male chased the female until just before the length of the string when it caught and mounted the other. When it was finished, it fell on its back while Key's rabbit ran the rest of the string length and rang the bell.

Allister's brand was a fairy, which Key asked about as he admired it on his cup. "I thought your brand would be a star for sure. Why is it a fairy?"

"It's a play on words," Allister admitted. "Before I joined the guard, I was a ferryman."

Key looked at him, puzzled. "You mean, you used to take people across the river? Where's your limp and glass eyeball? Where's your grim tooth smile?"

"Yeah, I put all that stuff away when I'm not at work, but if you don't believe me...." Allister dangled his hands while dragging one foot behind him as he limped in a circle. He screwed up his face and said things like,

"Fancy a lift, good sir?" and "That'll be two coppers extra for livestock."

Key laughed at the absurdity of it.

"Does that help? He asked, limping around another circle.

Key's sense of humor died as Dilly approached him with the hat. "I hope I didn't interrupt anything. I do believe we have a challenge, you and me. Would you like to select one now?"

"Tell the children to pull the rope! There are no boondogglers on board this vessel!"

Ignoring Allister, Key looked into the hat and saw only a single slip of paper. Where had the others gone? He was certain there were at least twenty in there the last time he checked. Dilly must have taken the others out to make sure the one was selected. He picked it up and read, "Classic Spar."

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"What an interesting surprise," Dilly said, not sounding surprised. "This one is just like it sounds. You and I both get a training weapon, and we spar until one of us gives up or cannot continue fighting. Unfortunately, we can't change or adjust any rules during this game. We must use the training ground rules to ensure our mutual safety and security."

Key got a bad feeling but did his best to portray fearlessness. He had also spent a lot of time training and was confident he could hold his own in a dual. He got an even worse feeling when he was offered one of two weighted weapons used for improving your two-handed sword strength. He selected one but noticed that Dilly did not take the other. Instead, he brought his own training sword, a lighter one.

"I think I'll use what Dilly's using," Key said, looking around for a different weapon.

"Where do you suppose are you going to find another one of these?" Dilly asked, inspecting the training sword. "There are only three approved training weapons anywhere near this camp, and the only one that's not weighted. You either have to fight with what you have or forfeit. It's your choice."

Key understood then and there. The exploit of this match was that he would move too slowly to cause any harm. The only reason the weighted weapons were approved inside the ring was to practice defending. Still, the only one who stood a chance using it was seven feet tall and built out of pure muscle. Key struggled to even lift the weighted weapon, let alone swing it around. This challenge was not going to end well.

"Would you like to do a different challenge? Dilly asked, taking violent practice swings in the air.

As soon as Key said "Yes," the look on Dilly's face made him feel like he had made a huge mistake.

"Okay," Dilly said with a look of pure joy. "We have to finish this one first."

That was it. This was what Dilly had been waiting for all night. He had accidentally accepted a second challenge. Now, he was facing the possibility of having Dilly's brand on his arm for the rest of his life. A sense of doom filled the air. Since he hadn't started or lost the first duel yet, he still had time to come up with a plan.

"What happens now that there are no more paper scraps in the hat?" Key asked quickly, edging away from the dual.

"Oh, I think I'll be able to find more after this. Are you ready?"

"I would like to add my own," Key said, coming up with a plan.

"Sure, why not? We'll mix it in with the others," Dilly said, beginning to sound impatient.

Key knew there were no others. At least, not for now. Dilly had taken all but the one out of the hat. If he came up with a game that no one else had seen before or had an imediate exploit to, he stood a chance at winning. He needed to think fast.

Dilly called for Key to hurry up and dual him, but he was too busy setting himself up for the second dual, the one that would make him permanently branded if he lost.

"I need paper," Key called out to the mulling crowd, but no one seemed to be in a hurry to help. A few of them looked lazily around, asked what it was for, or said they didn't know where any was. Finally, he found a piece of an existing challenge and used charcoal from the fire to write two words on it. He practically ran to the hat, placed the piece of paper inside, and then drew it back out again.

"Ah, look at this, Sergeant Dilly. I just drew our next challenge that you tricked me into accepting," Key said, holding up the paper that said, "Which Hand?"

Dilly's face deepened with anger. He had clearly planned what the next challenge was going to be and had been looking forward to it. His look softened as he pretended not to be perturbed.

"That's fine; let's finish this first before we talk about it, eh?" Dilly said, holding up his arms inside the dueling ring. "I'll try to go easy on you since you're uncomfortable with the heavy sword."

Key dragged the training sword inside the ring as everyone cheered him on, though he had no intention of fighting. "No need. I forfeit."

"Sorry, you can't do that," Dilly said, taking a fighting stance. "We are using official dualing rules, and there are no rules about forfeiting a sparring session before it has begun."

Dilly nodded to Steele, who initiated the dual by yelling, "Begin!"

Two things happened simultaneously. Dilly kicked off with his back foot, dashing forward as he raised his sword for a brutal strike, and Key dropped the handle of the weighted weapon, bent to the side, and ducked under the sword path. Key had been training daily, and his unarmed movement caused his fist to form and hook directly into Dilly's diaphragm. The hit was clean, but Key was still inside of Dilly's range as he struck forward with his right elbow, knocking him back.

"I yield! I yield!" Key yelled, just as Dilly's sword began falling towards him without faltering.

Steele jumped in and caught the attack just before it landed, but he was not happy about it.

"Key yields," he said, disarming Dilly with one fluid motion. "No need to get yourself disqualified."

Dilly stood, breathing heavily as he became aware of everything outside the dueling circle. He pointedly ignored Steele's warning as he found Key's brand and moved towards it, wiping blood from his mouth.

"Now that that match has concluded, I am interested in what you drew from the hat?" Steele said, setting the training weapon aside. "Did I hear you say "Which Hand?" How does it work?"

"I put a coin in my hand, and Dilly has to guess which hand it's in. It's as easy as that."

"I'll play your little game," Dilly said, holding the key brand over the fire. "But how do I know that you're actually going to put a coin in your hand? I want a rule that someone watches you as you place the coin in your hand for confirmation."

"As long as they don't tell you which hand it's in, you have a deal," Key specified.

Dilly finished branding his cup and stood in front of Key. He then directed one of the other sergeants to stand behind Key, watching as he placed a coin in his right hand. As soon as Key turned around and held up two hands for Dilly to choose between, he could tell someone was communicating with hand gestures behind him.

Dilly laughed as he placed a finger on Key's right hand. "You said they couldn't tell which hand it's in, not which hand it's not in."

Key smiled and opened his empty right hand. "I'm not too upset. Where's your brand anyway?"