Convict Unit: Black Parade

The Death Auction for Flight Risk’s effects began.

«The most useful item here is this trench coat—quite a quality piece,» Rapidfire added playfully.

He added, «Of course, considering what Flight Risk did in this coat, you might find it a little… unsettling. But then again, when are a dead man’s things not unsettling? Now, we’ll start the bidding at a mere ten thousand Credits!»

Having been on the same mission as the deceased, Jae-hee was prepared to raise his hand if no one else bid.

But this time, a group of suspicious-looking, middle-aged men in trench coats suddenly rose from their seats next to the Glasses Society.

Their representative, who wore nothing but a necktie on his bare chest under his coat, stepped forward and spoke.

“We, ‘The Trench Men,’ will purchase Flight Risk’s effects.”

The other audience members around them recoiled in unison, a wave of fear rippling through the crowd.

“He was a founding member of our society, a comrade who shared our conviction and dedicated this coat to its sacred mission.”

The representative gazed at Flight Risk’s coat on the auction block, his eyes filled with a deep melancholy.

“We would be grateful if you would grant us the right to remember him.”

A cold sweat trickled down Jae-hee’s back. “There are a lot of ‘societies’ in this place, huh…”

“Never seen those guys before… What are they, some kind of dark secret society?”

“So creepy desu…”

Razor and Status Window shuddered.

In any case, the bidding proceeded without a hitch, and all of Flight Risk’s belongings went to the Trench Men.

Swoosh!

Draping Flight Risk’s coat over their representative’s shoulders, the men turned and shuffled out of the theater. Beneath their trench coats, their hairy legs were on full display.

After a few more auctions for the effects of the dead, the Death Auction concluded.

Jae-hee looked puzzled that the effects of other prisoners he’d known hadn’t come up.

Seeing that, Razor began to explain.

“For the prisoners who died more recently, their belongings are probably still being sorted. Model Student and Flight Risk died about a month ago, and their stuff is just coming up now. There’s a bit of a delay.”

“Ah, I see.”

“And don’t feel indebted to someone just because you went on a mission together. It’s not like buying their old junk is some grand memorial service.”

They were wise words, but coming from Razor, who’d demanded a debt be paid for Miss Hellth’s death, they lacked a certain… conviction.

«Alright, everyone, we’re already halfway through today’s Hell Auction!» Rapidfire announced, wiping a bead of sweat from his brow as he scanned the audience.

«With Part One, the Death Auction, concluded, we’ll now take a short break before Part Two, the Main Auction! We’ll see you all in thirty minutes!»

The curtain fell, and the crowd began to disperse with a low murmur.

Status Window pulled out some snacks he’d prepared earlier and handed them to Razor and Jae-hee.

“Here, have some curry bread desu.”

It was from that evening’s mess hall service. Jae-hee had seen him stash a few extra, and now he knew why.

He gratefully accepted one and took a large bite. Just sitting through the auction was surprisingly draining, both mentally and physically.

“Wow, this is a real marathon… And I haven’t even seen the item I want yet.”

“You still remember what you’re here for?”

“Of course! It was the cape… No, wait, the Outing Permit!”

Razor chewed his curry bread, watching Jae-hee’s moment of confusion with an expression that said this was nothing new.

Status Window, having already devoured two buns, pushed his glasses up, the lenses flashing white.

“Part Two of the auction is going to be way more intense desu. You’d better stay sharp.”

“What makes you so sure?”

“That ring over there hasn’t been used once,” Status Window said, gesturing toward the square ring set up behind the stage curtain.

“There’s no way they set up a stage that elaborate just for show desu. The organizers will be dying to use that thing, and they’ll find any excuse to do it…”

Status Window was right.

While the mood during the Death Auction had been somber, the atmosphere in the theater ignited the moment the general auction began.

«Alright, our first item for Part Two is a limited-edition 2020 erotic magazine! It’s a thirty-year-old antique, but it’s in pristine condition! And it looks like we’re down to our final two bidders!»

And just like that, the very first item of Part Two christened the Ring of Hell.

«Will either of you concede? No? Excellent! You are truly magnificent bidders, worthy of participating in this Hell Auction! Now, you two! To the stage! To the ring!»

The two bidders, who had been glaring daggers at each other, scrambled from their seats and rushed onto the stage.

«In the blue corner! A resident of Deck Two! General inmate grade! Callsign—‘Powerbomb’!»

The muscular man in the blue corner ripped off his shirt with a menacing roar. He put on a show for the crowd, making his massive pectoral muscles ripple and bounce.

«And in the red corner! A resident of Deck Three! VIP inmate grade! Callsign—‘Bookworm’!»

Standing on the opposite side of the ring was a frail-looking woman. She was small in stature, with her hair in pigtails and a pair of round glasses that covered half her tiny face.

“Bookworm!”

“You can do it!”

“Show them the power of the four-eyes!”

She must have been a member of the Glasses Society, the dominant faction on Deck Three. As soon as she stepped into the ring, her fellow members erupted in cheers.

Bookworm gave them a slight nod, then clenched her small fists and threw a few jabs into the air.

“It’s so obvious…” Status Window surveyed the two corners and shook his head with a sigh. “This one goes to the red corner.”

“What? Why?” Jae-hee asked, confused.

From any angle, the physically overwhelming Powerbomb seemed to have the clear advantage, yet Status Window was declaring Bookworm the winner.

Did his ability to see status windows reveal something else?

“Isn’t it obvious desu? It’s a classic trope. When a huge, muscle-bound male character faces off against a delicate little female character, the girl always wins. It’s the law of the universe desu.”

“Huh? Really? Is that a thing?”

“Tsk, tsk. Jeez, Boy-kun. You need to log off from reality and brush up on your anime desu. Then you’d see these universal truths.”

Jae-hee tilted his head and studied the ring.

Status Window’s bullshit aside, there was something strange about the way the small woman stood before her hulking opponent without a trace of fear. Was she hiding an ace up her sleeve?

Just then, Rapidfire stepped between the two fighters, waving his arms dramatically.

«No time limit! No rules! No fouls! The fight ends when one of you surrenders… or dies!»

“Woooooah!”

The audience members, who had been dozing, yawning, or watching with feigned interest, finally roared to life.

“This is what I came for!”

“Kill him! Kill her! Kill them!”

“Blood! Skulls! Death!”

“Popcorn for sale, get your popcorn!”

“Taking bets on the winner right here!”

The room instantly devolved into marketplace chaos. Jae-hee, though startled, focused his attention on the ring.

«And now… for the first Hell Fight of today’s Hell Auction!»

Rapidfire chopped his hand down and leaped back. «Ready~ Go!»

Ding, ding, ding!

The bell rang, and the muscular Powerbomb shot forward with the force of an explosion.

Facing his charge, Bookworm bit her lip and clenched her small fists.

And then…

***

The match was over in an instant.

Jae-hee stared silently at the carnage in the ring, his hand clamped over his mouth in disbelief.

“Power… Powerbomb…”

Standing alone in the ring, raising a blood-soaked fist to the sky with a cruel smile, was…

“Powerbomb won… in a total landslide!”

It was Powerbomb.

The fight had been completely one-sided. Powerbomb had simply beaten the ever-loving shit out of Bookworm.

The first punch broke her nose, the second split her lip, and she immediately collapsed to the mat and surrendered.

The match was over in seconds.

“Hey, didn’t you say it was… obvious? That Bookworm would win for sure?”

Status Window adjusted his glasses, quiet and awkward.

He chuckled. “Well, it’s this kind of unpredictability that makes life worth living, don’t you think desu?”

“That wasn’t unpredictable, it was exactly what anyone with eyes would expect! We were the only ones who got it wrong!”

Razor cleaned his ear with his pinky and snorted.

He said, “Count me out. You two were the only ones confused. I mean, we’re not outside—everyone’s wearing Null Cuffs. Of course the musclehead has the advantage.”

“Woooooah!”

“Powerbomb! Powerbomb! Powerbomb!”

The match had ended in a flash, but the crowd seemed satisfied, having gotten a taste of blood right from the start.

After basking in the cheers, Powerbomb claimed his rightful prize: the 2020 erotic magazine. He carefully inspected its contents, then clutched it to his chest and quickly descended from the stage.

Meanwhile, the battered Bookworm was helped to her feet by other members of the Glasses Society and escorted away.

“Ugh, I really wanted that book…”

“It’s okay, it’s okay. We don’t need trashy magazines like that in our ‘library.’”

“But I wanted to read it.”

“You need to kick this habit of only reading smut. It’ll rot your bones…”

Watching them leave, Jae-hee broke out in another cold sweat. You mean she went up there with no plan at all, just because she wanted the magazine?

More items came and went. Expensive liquor, foreign cigarettes, the latest smartphones, thirty-year-old game consoles, and even contraband sesame oil and gochujang.

Most items were sold without incident, but occasionally a bidding war went to the bitter end, and each time, blood was spilled in the ring. The energy in the audience grew hotter with every fight.

Jae-hee decided to ignore everything but the Outing Permit. He was taking deep breaths, trying to calm his nerves, when the next item was announced.

«Now, this next one is a bit unusual. You hardly ever see these anymore, do you?»

Rapidfire held up a small case and shook it. «It’s a cassette tape of a 2000s trot music medley!»

“…!”

«They say that before the world went to hell, you could find trucks at highway rest stops selling these things by the crate. These days, with the highways in ruins and the rest stops all gone, they’re not easy to find. And they’re even harder to find inside this prison.»

After his explanation, Rapidfire called out the price.

«Starting at five thousand Credits! A 2000s trot music medley cassette tape, starting at five thousand Credits!»

Before he knew it, Jae-hee’s hand shot into the air. Razor and Status Window, unable to stop him in time, stared with their mouths agape.

Fortunately, there were no other bidders, and Jae-hee successfully acquired the 2000s trot music medley cassette tape for five thousand Credits.

“I can’t believe I scored this…!”

Jae-hee returned to his seat, beaming as he clutched the tape case. Razor and Status Window just shook their heads.

“I don’t get why you’d buy that, and I really don’t get your taste. What are you even going to do with it?”

“Listen to it, of course! This stuff is great!”

“This kid’s the youngest one here, but he’s got the taste of an old man.”

“I’m serious, it’s amazing! You know what? That settles it. From now on, during meal times, I’m going to blast trot medleys in the mess hall. Everyone must experience the beauty of trot!”

“Boy-kun, you have all the makings of a tyrant desu…”

After that minor incident, after countless items and countless brawls had stormed across the stage…

«And now, the moment you’ve all been waiting for! The highlight item of this Hell Auction!»

Finally, the item Jae-hee had been waiting for appeared.

«The Outing Permit!»