Brewing Bad (Fantasy Isekai Light LitRPG)

By the time Lucas reached Heiseburgle, he was already so weak he could barely disconnect the hoses of the armor or remove its screwed on helmet. For a moment, he didn't even do that much, because he worried the thing might be too hot for the gnome; he couldn't tell. His cloak made even hot metal seem cool.

If it's too hot for him, then he's already cooked, Lucas told himself, trying to shake himself free of the indecision of that moment. Either way you've got to get him the fuck out of there.

When he got the helmet free, he saw that the gnome was indeed breathing, though he had quite a concussion and was bleeding from the scalp. Lucas forced a healing potion down his throat, and then, unable to take the damn armor off without a wrench, he dragged the unconscious gnome out of the burning garden, and to the dewy grass beyond it.

"God you're fucking heavy for a little guy," Lucas grunted, slowly pulling the gnome through the wreckage as he avoided the worst of the fires.

There, Lucas found not just Heisenburgle's men waiting nervously near the road, while the rest of the servants cowered near the manor house. He ignored the latter group and motioned for Heisenburgle's men to come closer.

"Is he… Did he…" one of the gnome's assistants asked as they came over.

"He'll be fine," Lucas assured the man, adding a silent probably to the end of that statement. "Just get the tools, and get him out of this armor, and then get him back to the Blackgate so someone can tend to him."

"What about the Hyperquadabulator?" the third man asked while the first one started tending to their boss and the second one ran back to the wagon for the wrenches they'd need to remove his armor.

"Fuck the Hyperquadabulator," Lucas answered dismissively. He knew that the gnome would be pissed to hear that, but they could take care of it later. "I'm going to go to the stables and get a real horse to go back to the city while you guys—"

"What about the dragon?" the assistant asked, interrupting him.

"She's dead, no one will have to worry about her ever again," Lucas sighed, annoyed that he had to repeat such stupid things to such supposedly smart people.

"No, I mean, should we launch the flare?" he asked.

Now Lucas was confused. "Flare?" he asked dumbly.

"The flare that will set all of the contingencies I've planned in motion," the gnome rasped, before coughing up a lung full of smoke. "Did we really do it? Is she really dead? Is that possible?"

"Don't ask me," Lucas answered, willing himself not to breathe an obvious sigh of relief that the healing potion had worked. "Look at your talent and tell me."

Lucas couldn't see what he did, but from the widening of his eyes, it was clear that the bargain he'd struck with his god had been fulfilled by both parties. He only gave Heisenburgle a second to appreciate that, though, before he asked, "Now will someone please tell me what fucking contingencies we're talking about?"

Even as he asked the question, the assistant who had asked the question was lighting a mortar tube on a stick, and then holding it skyward. Heisenburgle opened his mouth to speak, but when the thing went off, everyone was deafened for a moment as an ugly red-orange flare soared into the sky where it detonated in swirling whites and golds.

"The contingencies that must be carried out in the event of Skylara's death," Heisenburgle started again.

"Uh… Shouldn't I have been included on this?" Lucas asked, worried about what the gnome might have just set in motion. "What did you just do?"

"Well, I called in the butchery crew I had staged nearby to come and start harvesting her carcass," Heisenburgle answered, letting Lucas breathe a sigh of relief, which made sense. Her blood alone was probably worth a fortune, and when you added the scales, skin, and teeth, well, it was something he should have thought of. He would have if it had been anyone else, but he'd wanted her too bad to care about any of that shit.

Lucas was about to thank him for his foresight, a rarity for sure, but in this case, well deserved. That was premature, though, because before he could open his mouth, the gnome continued.

"We also have to blast Skylara's lair shut. I have men ready to start work on that immediately as well," Heisenburgle said. That struck Lucas as extreme, but prudent. A dead dragon would spark a literal gold rush. However, before he could ask about that, the gnome finished with the real doozy, "And of course, the Prince must be informed of this development. I—"

Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

"You what?!" Lucas exploded. "You're going to tell him? Let him find out in a day or two, like everyone else! We have shit to do before he strats cracking down on everyone and their brother. He's going to freak!"

Heisenburgle let him finish, but only he had another coughing fit as he was finally freed of his armor. "Everyone will, as you put it, 'freak,' and the Prince must be prepared for that."

Before now, Lucas had planned to ask more about the dragon's horde, or maybe tag along. He might have even stayed to watch the gnome's men butcher and drain a dragon corpse, but now all of those options were impossible. He had to move.

"Damn it, man, why didn't you tell me you were going to do any of that?" Lucas asked, stunned. He'd just started thinking the gnome was reasonable, and now he blindsided Lucas like this.

"Mostly because you didn't ask, or, dare I say, plan for it," Heisenburgle answered. "Though even if you did, I confess that I wouldn't have told you about notifying the Prince."

"Why the fuck not?" Lucas demanded, resisting the urge to drop kick him.

"Because if I did, you would have taken it very poorly," Heisenburgle answered. "While it may look like I did this to you for entirely selfish reasons, I also did it for him, and for the kingdom. So I prepared a long memo, explaining… Hey! Where are you going?"

Lucas didn't stay for a long-winded sermon. While he doubted that he could catch Heisenburgles rider, he could certainly get his ass into gear, and while the man talked, he ran for the stables. Along the way, he ignored any of the servants who asked questions and decided not to go upstairs to fetch his things. He had a change of clothes up there and a few potions, but it wasn't anything he needed, though, if he'd had one of Heisenburgle's positions of wakefulness he might of made the detour, because her was exhausted, and this was exactly the wrong moment to do this shit.

"Not like I have a choice in the matter," he grumbled to himself as he rushed to get ahead of events. He killed a damn dragon; he should be give a parade and a week off, maybe even a nice honey moon, but right now none of that mattered. All that mattered was getting his friends together and warning them about what was to come before the world freaked out.

So, he ran into the stable, picked out the nicest-looking horse in the place, and then started to saddle it. A few minutes later, he was riding down the road to Lordanin as fast as he dared, worried about everything that was going to happen, and soon. The most he could do for now was take a sip from his endurance flask. That helped some, but his eyelids still felt very heavy.

Lucas nodded off in the saddle several times. Mostly, his chestnut gelding just slowed down to a walk and kept going, but once Lucas woke up to find himself sitting on it while it nibbled at grass growing on the side of the road. He did his best to stay awake, but given all he'd been through, that bordered on the impossible. Each time it happened, though, he lost a little more time.

Lucas reached the city by dawn, but he didn't go straight in, not the way he looked. The guards would have questions, and answers would be complicated given the state of things. Instead, he rode around the city, reaching Meadowin before most were even up.

It was here that his urgency started to fall apart. While he could see the partially finished building that would be his new home and his lab standing there, not so far from the main square, no one was staying there. Why would they? It didn't even have a roof.

He'd kept himself purposefully ignorant of where Kar'gandin, Hura'gh, and Danaria were these days in case Heisenburgle betrayed him to the Prince and the mad whipped up a spell or a truth potion to make Lucas talk. That had seemed smart before, but now it was an obstacle.

Still, he only had to look blearily around the place to find an answer. While he didn't see any signs of his gang, he saw the bakery open for business, and he moved quickly to it and went inside. Even if I don't know where anyone is, everyone else will, he told himself. In a town like this, there aren't any secrets, and even if the baker doesn't know, my favorite herbalist will.

Fortunately, he didn't need to bother Casarra to find that answer. The baker was happy to tell him; she didn't even seem to know it was supposed to be a secret. "Why, the Lady Parrin is staying at the old Townsend farmstead, along with her servants what survived the fire," she told Lucas without much prodding. He didn't know where that was, but she was happy to tell him.

After that, he was off once more. The sun was fully above the horizon now, and he was dead on his feet, but he was almost there.

When he arrived, the first thing he noticed was that what had once been a small farm had become a sort of armed camp. The barn looked to have been converted into a bunk houses, and there were a dozen tents between there and the farmhouse.

He'd planned to run and find Danaria first thing and wake her up. He didn't have to do that, though. Instead, he found her in the garden, humming to herself while she played with a few song birds.

That was enough to distract her, almost until he reached his woman. After he dismounted, though, she turned to look, and that distraction made whatever power she'd been using fail, sending her little flock chirping in all directions as she gazed at him in shock. No, not shock, he realized as he approached her, denial. She simply couldn't believe what she was seeing.

"Lucas?" she asked. Her tone told him she didn't believe her own eyes completely. "Is it really you? But you said…"

He could have answered her questions and reassured her. He could have worried about how filthy his clothes were, and how he shouldn't rub them on her dress. He could have done a lot of things, but in that moment, she was an angel lit by the sunrise and surrounded by flowers and song, and all he could think to do was kiss her.

He devoured her mouth with his, dipping her slightly as he swept her into his arms, and after a moment, she reciprocated. He knew she had questions; he did too, but right now no question was half as powerful as his need for her. He'd buried his emotions for her for months as he'd done his best to pretend she'd died, and right here, right now? It was like she was born again, and all of those emotions he'd locked away exploded out of his soul.

Everything was for this, he thought, basking in that moment, as he wished it would last forever.