Chapter 83
Winter break is over.
It’s been a long two weeks, or a short one… well, just a ridiculously short winter break.
Now I have to be locked in this school prison until the end of March.
Is there really no way to graduate early…? I ponder while opening the door, and the empty classroom welcomes me.
It’s strange.
I definitely thought in my previous life that it would be nice to go back to being a student. But now that I’m back in school, all I want is to graduate quickly.
“Hmm….”
Normally, I would have faked sleeping by resting my forehead on the desk without hesitation, but now I just can’t do that.
It’s not that I’m getting sentimental or anything.
It’s just that the desk is too cold, and my forehead gets chilly…
…By the way, I wonder how my evaluation in class turned out?
From what I learned during the Christmas party, my reputation in class is that of a pitiful girl who keeps others at a distance due to past wounds.
But it turns out that it was all a misunderstanding, and Miyauchi said she would explain it to the other classmates.
However, I haven’t seen any discussions about it in the class group chat over winter break.
Did Miyauchi forget?
Or maybe she told everyone at the Christmas party that day.
Well, I don’t mind if they find out that I’m not really the pitiful girl who keeps others at arm’s length because of past wounds.
After all, the fact that I have no friends at school won’t change.
You want me to use this as an opportunity to get close to my classmates?
That’s such a ridiculous idea for someone who has no idea about the school ecosystem.
People who can say such things are usually the social butterflies with plenty of friends around them.
Just so you know.
In school, human relationships are typically established within three days after classes have been assigned.
Unless it’s a special case like transferring to a new school, it’s absolutely impossible for someone new to slip into an already established social circle…!
So, just like the past year, I can spend the next two years alone in school.
Wow, that sounds like so much fun.
…But do I really need friends?
It’s not that I dislike Suzuha or Yukari; I just wonder if I really need to push myself to mingle with others.
It would be a lie to say I don’t regret not trusting others in my previous life, but the truth is I’ve grown accustomed to this way of life.
So, do I really need to make an effort to fit in with people?
But even while I think this way, there’s a part of me that longs for human warmth.
When my classmates suggest getting together, I find myself wanting to go.
Deep down, I wish I could say I want to be friends with someone who treats me kindly.
I feel happy when I hear someone say “friend” about me first.
…What do I really want?
“Kayanoh!”
“Eek…!”
Lost in those thoughts, I turned around to see Miyauchi calling me from behind…
“Uh, Tateyama…?”
No, it wasn’t Miyauchi, but the most popular girl in class, Tateyama.
“Uh, you, um, came here early…?”
I don’t think I’ve ever seen Tateyama arrive at this time, except during the cultural festival.
“Ah, yeah. I knew Kayanoh would be here at this time. I wanted to tell you something before everyone else comes.”
“Something you want to tell me…?”
“Yes.”
Tateyama clapped her hands together loudly, creating a clap! sound.
“Kayanoh, I’m really, really sorry…!”
She bowed her head and apologized to me.
That exact pose you only see in anime when the protagonist is apologizing to someone.
I’ve never seen someone apologize in real life like this before.
Or maybe I just don’t know because I don’t have anyone around me, and this kind of apology is actually the standard?
But why is Tateyama suddenly apologizing to me…?
“I… I heard everything from Miyauchi. She said you’re really shy.”
“Ah, yes….”
“So back then, when we met in Akihabara… I thought I might have made it awkward by following you around without permission… I’m so sorry….”
Oh, I remember that.
It was certainly quite an awkward situation, but I don’t think it warranted this much of an apology…
“I set my own image of Kayanoh without consulting you… and even spread a nickname like Ice Princess… I’m truly sorry…!”
“Tateyama, I…”
Huh? Ice Princess? What does that mean?
Was there a nickname like that for me?
“Um, what exactly is that…?”
“Don’t worry, Kayanoh. It’s just me who calls you that….”
“Miyauchi.”
Answering my question was Miyauchi, who casually walked into the classroom, looking embarrassed as she covered her reddened face with her left hand.
“Speaking of which, why are you talking so loudly outside, Tateyama? If someone happened to pass by, it would’ve been a disaster….”
“Huh? But Miyauchi said there’s hardly anyone around at this time, right? Isn’t it fine?”
“Still, you never know….”
And so, they naturally started chatting.
“Um, excuse me for a moment… I’ll be right back….”
I fled to my sanctuary, the old science room.
★
Lunch break.
For most high school students, lunchtime is a welcome break after intense studying and a time to bond with friends.
But for me, lunchtime is just a time to eat.
Before I fully grasped the class dynamics, I used to eat lunch alone in the courtyard. Once I got a feel for the atmosphere, I began sitting alone in the classroom for lunch.
Then, my routine was just sitting quietly and zoning out or taking a short nap.
And today, there was a crack in that routine.
“First of all, I made sure to tell everyone in class. It was all just our misunderstanding….”
“Is that so?”
Why are we discussing this now?
Thanks to what Tateyama said in the morning, I already knew the situation, so I didn’t need to hear it again.
Yet, Miyauchi’s continuous talking made the taste of my lunch barely noticeable.
But I know this is coming from her goodwill, so I couldn’t bring myself to refuse.
The one good thing is that the other classmates are keeping their distance like usual.
Of course, I feel some stares every now and then, but at least they aren’t openly glaring at me.
“Ah, are you feeling pressured because I’m here now…?”
“No, it’s okay….”
Of course, that’s a lie.
I’m holding back the nausea.
But I can’t just tell her to leave because it’s uncomfortable.
The moment I say that, I’ll become someone who doesn’t belong in this class.
“That’s a relief….”
Though I’m not relieved at all….
★
[【SkyTravel】I will stand in the sky #KainohIzumi #Star’s Flow #SkyTravel #ST]
“Sometimes you find yourself in a situation where your perception of someone is just a bit different, right…?”
-Yeah, that happens.
-I hate that some people determine right and wrong based on differences in perception.
“You mentioned going to the Christmas party before, right?”
-That party where you sat quietly without singing any songs?
…Why on earth do they all remember that?
But the grown-up me knows better than to react to such things anymore.
I know they’ll just tease me more if I do.
“So at that party, I talked with a classmate, and there was apparently quite a misunderstanding….”
-Did you get into a fight?
“Ah, it’s not about who was wrong. It was just a misunderstanding, to put it simply… But when I finally had a proper chat today… I realized again, it feels so much easier to eat quietly alone, doesn’t it? Talking while eating… wow, totally impossible….”
Even at home, I usually eat in silence, so when I’m eating with others, I can’t process my thoughts quickly enough.
-Eating alone is kind of embarrassing though, haha.
-Your way of thinking is so antisocial.
“Huh? I have plenty of friends, okay? I’m totally a socialite! I just want to eat alone during meal times. Actually, I feel it’s more antisocial to say you want to eat with others out of embarrassment for eating alone! Aren’t you guys the ones without friends…?”
-So Mei-chan is tough enough now to not be broken by this, huh?
-Mei-chan is still growing.
“Hehe… well, anyway, I was just thinking about that today… As for the game we’re playing, it’s SkyTravel, just as I mentioned before….”
-Here we go at last.
-You said you wanted to try it last time.
-What a change for Mei-chan, who only played bad games.
“TLQ is a masterpiece, you know….”
SkyTravel.
An action RPG where you search for traces of the gods in a world without deities.
Released last November, it’s all about exploring a vast world and aiming for the ending.
The biggest feature is that there’s no fixed order for reaching the ending.
Once you get past the tutorial, you can play however you like, it seems.
Anyway, I bought ST as soon as it was released, but I haven’t played it at all until now.
I’ve only seen a few highlight videos.
I could have played alone, but since I have the chance, I want to stream it.
But right after its release, the company didn’t grant streaming permissions, and it’s only now, two months later, that I finally got the go-ahead.
It’s always tiring that I have to get permission from the company to play a game.
It often happens that I can’t play the game I want until its trends have passed.
There aren’t many games like TLQ where the developers grant streaming permissions.
This just proves that TLQ truly is a masterpiece.
“Well then, shall we get started…!”
With that, I hit the ‘Game Start’ button, and with a grand soundtrack, the screen went dark.
When the screen brightened again.
[Hades’ Remains – Cerberus]
[HP: 13451]
A monster with a long HP bar stood facing my character.
[Please choose a weapon.]
The system command appeared next.
There was no hesitation.
I had already decided on the weapon I’d use when I bought ST.
No matter what anyone says, it’s a weapon that suits the inner manly side of me best… the Tachi (Japanese Long Sword).
“Hehehe….”
-This is a disaster, huh?
-Definitely came back from watching something weird.
-It’s so obvious you know what kind of weapon this is.