Aristocrat (HP/SI)

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***

Here it was exam time. First year students started their exams earlier than the rest of the class, and accordingly, they finished faster too.

Richard found all of his exams, with the exception of Potions, very easy. Potions, as he had expected, was not the highest grade, but "higher than expected". But that wasn't bad either, considering that only Hannah and Susan were on the same level as him in his department. The rest of his Puffendu classmates should get a grade lower - 'satisfactory'. Snape is unlikely to give a negative grade - he's not as cruel as he wants to appear. Bile, sarcastic, picky misanthrope, ready to hand out punishments for any provocation. But he doesn't usually set out to take anyone down. Though Harry Potter had said that the Potions Professor behaved differently to him, as if he hated him from the first lesson.

It was terribly hot outside. Harry Potter had once complained to Richard about the pain in his scar, to which Grosvenor had advised his mate to visit the school healer. The visit to Madam Pomfrey didn't help Harry much, which made Richard somewhat wary. The fellow suspected a dreadful disease that had been a scourge in the past that had become his present - cancer. So Richie was worried about Harry, whom he had managed to become attached to and for whom he felt responsible.

The last exam of all four first year faculties at once was History of Magic. Surprisingly, the exam was not taken by a ghost, but by an elderly wizard from the Ministerial Commission - Professor Richard Vine.

After the exam, Richard, Harry and Ron separated from their faculty mates, went outside and strolled leisurely along the shore of the lake, away from prying ears.

- No more lessons! - Ron Weasley sighed with relief, a look of indescribable happiness on his face. - Harry, you could look a little more cheerful. After all, we have a week before the exam results are announced, and we can rest for another week. They say we only get a week off in second year.

Harry rubbed his forehead and wrinkled his nose.

- I'm sick of this pain," he said sharply. - The scar hurts all the time. It used to hurt before, but rarely. Now it's like it's on fire. And the healer didn't say anything, just flailed her arms and gave him a potion that doesn't work.

- Yes, Harry, it's not good," Richard said. - I'm afraid it might be a tumour. We'll send you to the Royal Children's Hospital right after school, because I see that wizards are quite incompetent in some diseases. Though in other cases they can give a head start to any doctors, for example, they can cure ordinary diseases quite well and very quickly.

- Guys," Ron whispered, "I heard that Dumbledore left school today.

- Ron, that's the way it's supposed to be," Richard was beaming with smugness. - I had to pay a lot of money to organise an unscheduled meeting of the International Confederation of Mages. The headmaster won't be at school until late afternoon. And after lunch, your brothers have to incapacitate Snape and Quirrell, so be ready - we start the operation an hour after lunch.

- Snape?! - Ronald was horrified. - Oh, Merlin! He's going to kill them! I've had the occasional argument with Fred and George, but I don't wish that fate on them.

- I don't think Snape will do them any harm," Richard shook his head from side to side. - Besides, Fred and George promised not to get caught. Given their considerable experience as pranksters and the amount of time they've had to prepare, I think they'll be fine.

- Richie, we promised we wouldn't tell anyone," Harry looked at his mate reproachfully.

- I didn't tell anyone," Richard assured him honestly. - I just gave the twins an assignment without telling them what it was for. They assured me the other day that everything was ready and we'd have three to five hours. But paranoia tells me that we can't spend more than a couple of hours on the operation.

Harry wrinkled his nose again and rubbed the scar with the palm of his hand.

- Richie, you mentioned once that we need an alibi," he said.

- We'll have an alibi, boys," Grosvenor Jr. said with a mysterious look.

- Yeah?" Ron wondered. - But how? We can't be in two places at once, can we? Or..." His face lit up with enlightenment. - Did you bribe witnesses?

- No, boys," Richard shook his head. - You'll see for yourself soon enough.

Richie glanced at his watch and added:

- It's time. Let's go to the one-eyed witch's corridor.

Ron and Harry were intrigued by Richard's behaviour and followed him without thinking. When he opened the secret passage, the boys watched with breathless delight.

- The secret passage! - Ron said excitedly. - Where does it go?

- To the basement of the Sweet Kingdom," said Richie. - Hurry inside, the statue will be back in place in a moment.

Richard performed a marvellous display of acrobatics and climbed into the secret passage. Harry quickly followed him into the hole, and Ron climbed in after him.

After a while the boys made their way out of the basement of the shop and into a small alleyway. The door was easily unlocked with a standard spell that Harry Potter had mastered to perfection.

- Isn't this Hogsmeade? - Ron looked around excitedly. - Cool!

- Are we expecting someone? - Harry kept up with his friend's craning neck.

- We are," Richard said chastely. - Herring spawn in June..." he said in a clear voice.

- What?" Ron looked at Richard in bewilderment.

Suddenly Harry pulled out his wand and froze, horrified as the unremarkable bush straightened and took on the features of a man. As he looked closer, he suddenly realised that it was in fact a man in a military camouflage dressing gown with a blotchy face.

- The birds are flying in schools," the soldier replied.

Harry could tell that it was a soldier by the automatic rifle on the man's shoulder.

- But spawning is better," Richard replied.

Ron looked from Richard to the soldier in stunned amazement. His eyes bulged in amazement.

- What the hell are you talking about?! - he exclaimed nervously.

- Quiet, Ron," Richie shouted.

The soldier approached the boys and looked them over with an unconcealed disapproval.

- Sir," he said to Ritchie, "the password and recall are correct. We're at your disposal, sir.

- I need three men," Richard addressed the man in an orderly tone. - Get down to the basement quickly.

The military man put his right hand behind his back and showed some signs with his fingers. A moment later, two more bushes took the shapes of people and quickly appeared next to the boys.

Harry and Ron watched with great interest mixed with delight.

- Are those Muggles! - Ron whispered in Richard's ear with immeasurable surprise.

- Forget it, Ron. You didn't see anyone," the young earl replied with a hint.

The soldiers quickly found themselves in the basement of the Sweet Kingdom. The boys went down the same way, and soon they all found themselves in an underground passage.

Richard began to give out instructions to the military men:

- Gentlemen, you must have been briefed, but I doubt you believed everything. Just in case I repeat: now you undress and take a special drug. For exactly one hour, your appearance will change dramatically. Time it. In exactly 58 minutes you will need to take the second portion of the drug. Same with the third, but hopefully you won't need it. Your job is to provide us with an alibi. Be visible to the students, but don't socialise with them so no one suspects a switch. On the signal or in two hours and forty minutes, meet at the statue of the one-eyed witch.

- Your radio, sir.

The first trooper handed Richard a Walkie-Talkie.

While the impromptu briefing was in progress, the soldiers promptly unmasked. Ritchie pulled nine vials of Werewolf Potion from his bag.

- Harry, Ron, I need your hair. A few hairs will suffice.

- What's this?

Harry Potter's question was very appropriate. The soldiers themselves would have been glad to know what they would have to drink, but dared not ask questions.

Richie answered:

- A reversal potion, it allows you to temporarily change your appearance to someone whose hair you add to the base.

The naked stout men each drank one vial of the potion, to which the boys' hair had been added, without question. Their faces grimaced as if they had to drink some kind of nasty stuff. After that, their bodies flowed and shrank greatly. The transformation resulted in two Harry Potters, Ronald Weasley and Richard Grosvenor each in the tunnel.

The doppelgangers quickly donned their school uniforms and robes, which Richie handed them from his bag.

Richie began to take off the robes and froze for a moment under the astonished gazes of Ron and Harry.

- What are you guys waiting for? - He asked. - You're all wearing your ninja costumes, aren't you?

- Yes," Harry confirmed with a nod.

- Me too. It's very comfortable, it doesn't feel hot," Ron said. - It just feels weird for summer, like wearing underpants.

Soon the six boys were out of the underground passage. Three looked like normal Hogwarts students, and three looked like miniature ninjas.

Richie turned to the doppelgangers:

- 'Has everyone studied the map of the castle and surrounding area?

- Yes, sir," Ron's doppelganger replied.

- Dismissed.

Harry, Ron and Ritchie put on their thermal imaging goggles. Harry had to put them on over his goggles. The doppelgangers, a little tense, set off at a measured pace towards the stairwell.

- Activate invisibility, boys," Richard commanded.

- Richie, what about our bags? - Harry asked.

- Mine has a similar enchantment," said Richie.

- I have the same one," Ron said. - They make them at my father's work, he made them for all his brothers.

The three of them disappeared from the visual spectrum, and the Earl's and Ron's bags were similarly invisible.The boys orientated themselves by heat vision and moved quickly towards the forbidden corridor.

No sooner had they reached the stairs than the head clerk's cat got in their way.

- Should I kick it? I've been wanting to do that for a long time," Ron whispered to his mates.

Harry shook his head in denial, and Richie gave Ron a light slap.

The three boys crept carefully past Mrs Norris. Though she didn't see them or hear their footsteps, she followed them carefully with her head, apparently sensing smells and movement with her nose and vibrissae.

They met no one else, and quietly reached the door behind which the cerberus lurked.

- No one is here, you can take off the invisibility," Richie said and became visible.

Tucking his glasses into one of the many pockets, he pointed at the door to Harry, who had also dropped his invisibility.

Potter nodded and used his crowning spell:

- Alohomora!

Something clicked in the lock. Ron reached for the doorknob, but was stopped by Richard.

- Wait," Grosvenor said, then rounded his eyes in amazement.

Harry found Ron's rummaging around in his bag odd. Even more startling to him was the fact that his Gryffindor friend had pulled out an owl.

- What?!" Ron looked at his mates. - It's an owl.

- An owl? - Harry looked at the ruffled bird in amazement.

- An owl?! - Richard looked equally dumbfounded.

- Yeah, an owl," Ron snarled. - Haven't you ever seen one?

- Why do you need an owl, Ron? - Potter asked.

- What if there are traps? - Ron asked. - Or a Cerberus... We could feed it to the dog and run away while it's fascinated. You'll deactivate the traps, won't you?

- It's a pity for the bird," Richard looked sympathetically at the redhead's grasp. If it hadn't been for the taped beak and the boy's firm grip, it would have been mauled.

- It's Malfoy's owl! - Ron replied with evil delight in his eyes. - So no pity.

- Oh, well, if it's Malfoy's..." Harry stretched out. - I do feel sorry for the bird, though. It wasn't its fault that its owner was an asshole.

- Never mind the owl," Richard stopped paying attention to the bird. He pulled a small pistol with a very wide clip out of his bag and held it out to Potter. - Harry, you're the only one of us who can shoot.

- Richie," Potter stared at the weapon in horror, "are you suggesting I shoot a cerberus?

- It's a gun for veterinarians," Grosvenor explained. - It uses darts loaded with elephant doses of sleeping pills.

- Oof!" Potter breathed out in relief. - Do you think it'll work on a Cerberus?

- It works on an elephant, so it'll knock this dog off his feet," the young aristocrat shrugged. - Nowhere in magical literature does it say that sleeping pills don't work on cerberus.

A few seconds later they were standing in front of the open door. The sight of the open door reminded all three of what lay ahead. What awaited them were three huge, grinning mouths of a giant three-headed dog that was taller at the withers than any of the boys.

Harry turned first to Richard and then to Ron.

- Guys, I've been thinking," he said. - Why didn't we send soldiers in our place?

- Because we were going to keep it a secret, Harry," Richie answered, unable to take his eyes off the cerberus. - Besides, they're not wizards.

- But do muggles at Hogwarts and secrecy go together somehow? - Weasley asked the logical question.

- Sort of," Richie replied. - "Don't ask me what it took to get the Muggles to agree. I had to kill the short Easter holidays and make some promises. Harry, what are we waiting for?

- Ah, yes!

Potter caught himself, raised his gun, took aim....

He expected to hear a loud gunshot, but instead there was a slight pop and hiss as he pulled the trigger. The small dart hit the neck of the centre head of the cerberus, who disliked the jab intensely. The dog growled loudly, but the muffling charms Richard had applied in time kept it private.

Ron huddled fearfully against the wall.

- Um, guys, how long is he going to be like this? - He asked. - What if the chain doesn't hold...

- We'll have to wait a couple of minutes," Richie said. - It's not poison, and we're not killers. Although..." he glanced at the owl.

- It's a Malfoy owl! - Ron snapped at him. - And anyway, you'll thank me for the owl when it saves our lives.

The growling grew quieter and quieter, and then it stopped. The dog swayed and sank to his belly, then fell on his side. There was no doubt that he was sound asleep.

The lads moved slowly towards the hatch that the cerberus guarded. The hot, stinking breath that escaped from the three jaws was felt more and more strongly.

- Guys, we've got to get the dart," Richard said. - We can't leave any evidence behind.

- Do you want to do it yourself, Richie? - Ron asked.

- No, I wouldn't dream of it," Grosvenor shook his head.

Richie and Harry turned and looked at Weasley almost simultaneously.

- Why Ron! - Weasley said indignantly. - I'm holding an owl!

- That's a good excuse, Ron!" Richard said sarcastically, giving his mate a thumbs-up.

- I'll do it," Harry Potter stepped boldly towards the cerberus.- Harry, can't you use the enticement charms? - Richard asked.

- I don't know them," Harry answered honestly, pulling the dart from the cerberus' neck and quickly bouncing away.

Richard bent over the hatch and pulled on the ring.

- What's in there? - Ronald whispered excitedly.

Harry Potter also bent over the hatch and answered first:

- 'It's as dark as Hitler's arse! I can't see any stairs. We'll have to jump.

- Harry, I know you've got a headache, but not so bad that you're going to crash into the first hole you see," Richard said ironically. - Give me a light.

- Oh, yes, light," Potter slapped his forehead with the palm of his hand. He pulled out his wand: "Lumos!

The bright light from the ball at the tip of Harry's wand illuminated the darkness below.

- And what's down there? - Weasley asked again.

- Some kind of fucking dancing," Richard rounded his eyes.

- Э? - Weasley looked at him with incomprehension.

- I said, there were some plant tentacles sprawled in the corners when Harry turned on the light.

- Richie, don't you know the name of that... um... herb? - Potter said. - You're a genius!

- Really?!" exclaimed Richie sceptically. - No, maybe, but it wasn't proper for an aristocrat to be tinkering with herbs like some kind of gardener or farmer.

- You should have said you didn't know! - Weasley snorted merrily.

- Let's jump," Potter said. - The grass looks thick and will soften the fall.

- Harry, are you sure you didn't hit your head? - Richie held Harry's shoulder. - It's fifty metres at least. Why break bones when you can fly down safely?

Richie pulled the glider out of his pocket rather quickly, used his wand to make it a normal size, and stood on it.

- What are we waiting for? Let's go down!

Harry and Ron stood next to Richard on the glider. Their feet were glued to the surface of the artefact at the same moment - the safety net that protects the flyer from falling. The glider angled into the hatch, forcing the boys to lean and duck.

The boys flew over the sprawling green tentacles towards the only stone passageway that led away from here. All they heard, except for their own breathing and the rustling of grass, were drops of water falling from the walls.

The corridor went sharply downwards and led them into a brightly lit hall with a high arched ceiling. The hall was full of fluttering and circling birds, small and bright as jewels. There was a massive wooden door on the other side of the hall.

After landing and getting off the glider, the boys made sure the birds weren't going to attack them and reached the door.

- Oh, flying broomsticks! - Ron noticed a pair of tattered brooms leaning near the door.

Potter jerked the door handle and stated:

- Locked.

He immediately pointed his wand at the door.

- Alohomora!

Nothing happened.

- Alohomora! Alohomora! Alohomora!

- Harry, stop it," Richard said. - You can see it's more locked than the first door.

- Um..." Ron, cradling the owl and cocking his head upwards, said, "Guys, I think those aren't birds, they're keys. We should get on our brooms and catch them.

Richard gave Ron a look that was no doubt reproachful.

- Ron, there are hundreds of them," he said. - Don't be silly. We'll break that door down faster.

- Break it down? - Weasley looked at the massive door doubtfully. - Unless Harry kicks it with his head," he added ironically.

- He's not doing well with it as it is," Richard said, taking a steel cylinder out of his bag.

- Hey!" Potter said indignantly.

- Who's going to jump into a fifty metre hole? - Richie pointed out a fact that had almost happened.

Harry was embarrassed and fell silent.

Ron watched in amazement as a bright stream of light erupted from the steel cylinder in Richard's hands.

Harry watched with equal amazement. His jaw dropped to the floor.

- My God!" he exclaimed. - That's a Jedi lightsaber! Richie, where did it come from?

- The same place where all my other gadgets come from," Grosvenor replied. - The wizards in the workshop had managed to cram some clever modification of Lumos into the metal cylinder. Watch out!

Richie tried to burn through the door, but failed.

- It looks like it's heavily enchanted," Weasley said. - We'll have to get the keys.

- We don't have time for this nonsense.

Richie brushed off Ron's words and took a couple of steps to the side. He plunged the light blade into the stone wall like a hot knife into butter.

- Ha!" he said triumphantly. - As usual, the door had been reinforced, but the walls had been forgotten.

In a matter of seconds, Richie had carved a round hole in the stone wall. Then he pulled a robot out of his bag, zoomed in, climbed inside the suit under Ron's amazed gaze, and pulled out a heavy stone circle with melted edges with metal arms.

Putting the suit back in place, he grinned victoriously and pointed to the passageway.

- Please, gentlemen.

Harry approached the hole in the wall and jerked sideways.

- It's hot," he said.

- Okay," Richard sighed, then pointed his wand at the hole. - Aguamenti!A stream of water came out of the end of the wand like a hose and hissed against the hot walls of the hole. The air was filled with hot steam, and there was a loud crunch like a firecracker explosion - several stones cracked.

As the walls of the hole cooled, the boys made their way into the next room.

The next room was so dark that they couldn't see anything at all. However, as soon as they took a few steps, the room was suddenly flooded with bright light.

All three of them stared in amazement. They were standing on the edge of a huge chessboard, right behind black stone pieces that were taller than the three of them, even the lanky Ron. On the other side of the board stood the white pieces.

Harry and Ron shivered, and Richard rubbed his chin thoughtfully - the white pieces, unlike the black ones, had no faces.

- What do we do now? - Harry whispered.

- I think the answer is pretty obvious," Ron said. - We have to win to get to the other side of the room. We have to replace the pieces with ourselves.

There was another door behind the white figures.

- Guys," Richard pointed out, "what's with all the suicidal tendencies? Are all Gryffindors like that, or is it just you?

- What do you suggest? - Weasley asked.

- 'Just fly over in a glider like we used to do. And don't care about the door, we'll just make another hole.

- Sounds good," Potter remarked. - I'm sorry, Ron, but let's skip the chess game today.

- Merlin! - Ron said expressively. - How did I not realise that?!

A short while later, the boys calmly glidered over the chess pieces, who went wild and snapped out of their seats. They piled up below the glider. Richard had to make a hole at the height of the glider, and a larger diameter than last time.

This time it was Harry Potter who showed himself. He took out his robotic spacesuit and glued himself to the wall (the ninja suit allowed him to do this). Behind him, Ron was glued to the wall and Richie stood on the edge of the glider. Harry zoomed into the spacesuit standing on the flying platform beside Richie, then climbed in and took off.

Harry, levitating in the spacesuit, ripped out a rock with his steel tentacles and rained it down on the giant chess pieces. Several of them were destroyed. There was a terrible rumble in the room.

The next thing he did was to cool the walls of the hole and fly through it. Harry flew in a spacesuit, while Richie and Ron flew in a glider.

In the spacious hall below was a giant troll. He cocked his little head upwards and stared down at the fliers in amazement.

- Harry, fall on his head," Richard exclaimed loudly.

Harry Potter's adventurous streak immediately kicked in. The boy corkscrewed downwards without a second thought, four flexible metal arms folded together in front of him. The manipulators struck the troll's head, and then he kicked it with his legs. Finally, there was a crunch, and the troll collapsed to the floor with an awful thud. He was definitely unconscious.

The boys landed at the other end of the hall by a door, which Harry opened carefully and peered in cautiously.

- 'Guys,' he said, 'everything seems fine in there. There's a table in the centre, and seven vials of liquids on it.

The boys walked into the room. Just as they reached the table, suddenly a wall of magical bright purple fire burst out from the floor behind them. Immediately, tongues of black flame danced in front of the door that was in front of them.

- Super! - Richie said with ineffable sarcasm. - We're locked in here.

- There's a mystery here," Ron grabbed the unrolled scroll of parchment on the table.

- Ron, you'd better hold your owl and not grab any of that nasty stuff," Richard admonished.

- It's not my owl, it's Malfoy's," Weasley replied. - And why shouldn't I take the parchment?

- What if it's cursed or poisoned? - Richard said.

- 'He could be,' Potter pointed out. - Apparently, the traps were set by the teachers. The first was from Professor Sprout, the second was Flitwick's work, and the third was McGonagall's. The troll was a surprise from Quirrell. And the vials... They must be Snape's trap. He'd do well to poison the parchment.

The scroll fell out of Ron's hands and onto the floor. The boy jumped away from it like a snake and wiped his palm nervously on his suit, as if that would help get rid of the poison.

Potter, in his monumental spacesuit, hovered over the parchment.

- There's a mystery here," he said. - It's like one potion will allow you to go forward, one backwards, one vial contains wine, and the others poison.

- There! - exclaimed Weasley happily. - Let's try the liquids on the owl! I told you it would come in handy!

Ron only had time to peel the tape off the owl's beak. He was doing it with unprecedented enthusiasm. Harry approached the fire in the doorway and gingerly held out a hand, protected by the fabric of his spacesuit, to the flames.

- There's no need to poison the bird, Ron," he said. - You can get through in a spacesuit. The fire doesn't burn.

- The suit is designed to withstand a hundred degrees for a very long time," said Richie. - So it can withstand higher temperatures for a short time.

- But we only have two spacesuits," Weasley said with slight annoyance.

- No," Grosvenor shook his head negatively. - Two spacesuits and one prototype of the coloniser's robotic armour. It's got a couple of broken tentacles, but that's not important in this case.

- Oh," Ron said. - Then we can all get through.

Richie pulled out both suits. While he was climbing into the robot, and Weasley was trying on the spacesuit and trying to shove a struggling and bellowing owl inside, holding it to his stomach, Potter boldly jumped into the fire and leapt through the doorway.

His loud, speaker-enhanced voice came from the other side:

- 'It's perfectly fine, guys, jump in.

Richie and Ron had successfully leapt through the magical flames without even scorching their protective cloaks.

In the centre of the spacious room stood a single object, a huge rostral mirror.

- Oh!" Potter said excitedly. - "It's the Einaledge mirror! It shows the wizard's wishes.

- Curious, Harry, how can you be familiar with such an artefact? - Richard asked, looking at the mirror with interest.

The young Grosvenor was eager to get his hands on this mirror. An artefact that could manifest wishes would be incredibly lucrative. If something like virtual reality helmets could be made based on it, people would be willing to pay huge sums of money.

Although no... To produce virtual reality helmets would require the power of thousands of wizards. But if you create something like servers that can remotely connect to the user through Protean charms, it should be a sweet deal.

- Guys, be careful with the mirror! - Richie shouted menacingly at his mates.

Ron, who was about to approach the mirror, bounced away from it and turned to Richard.

- Is it cursed? - He asked apprehensively.

- I don't know," Richie replied. - But I need it, so don't even go near it. In spacesuits, you'll smash it.

- Э?!

Ron's face was incredibly surprised. His lips were folded into a bow, his eyes bulging, and he looked at Richard in bewilderment.

Harry, too, looked at Grosvenor with incomprehension.

- Why do you need a mirror, Richie? - He asked. - Dumbledore, when he caught me in front of the mirror, said it was very dangerous. Well, like people would want to watch their dreams come true over and over again.

- Yeah! Yeah, baby! - Richard said excitedly, as if he'd spent the night with a hot girl. - I knew right away that this thing was a game, so don't you dare scratch this beauty! It's gonna make me billions. People will bring me money to immerse themselves in their dreams! No money no honey (Know mani no hani)! Ha ha ha ha!

- Harry, I'm so afraid of him....

Ron was whispering to his friend, but since he was in a spacesuit and his speech was duplicated through a speaker, his voice was unexpectedly loud. But Richard didn't even think about taking offence at that.