Aka Amy

"Hello? You still there?" Kreff asked. "Amy?"

I grimaced, "Sorry Kreff, sorry everyone. I'm here, I'll try and stay focused."

Leah offered, "We don't have to keep doing this if you've got something else going on. We can always save it till next time."

"No I'm good," I stated. "We already missed last week because I had RL stuff going on, and next week might be busy for me as well. Saturday night for sure, but hopefully I'll be available Friday. Anyways, I'm here, so let's do this. Ok?"

Leah and Kreff both agreed. Raven stayed out of it, and I was positive the other two had noticed something was up with her. She still joked and flirted with them, but her interactions with me were different now. She was more reserved with me, there wasn't any more flirting or teasing.

I worried the others would think our dark rogue and I had some sort of falling out, since it probably came across like she was suddenly acting a lot less friendly towards me. And for that matter they'd obviously noticed the way I was acting different tonight as well.

In my case I was just distracted. I kept thinking about the night before, what I did for April, and how it played out afterwards. I pretended to be Amethyst the Goddess and granted a miracle for Tess's friend. And I tried to downplay it afterwards, I told her I was just plain old Amy and I could channel Amethyst now and then. Even so, April was still understandably awed.

Now in addition to Tess I also had one of her classmates acting like I was a capital-G goddess. And I knew that was just the beginning. Regardless what we said about secrecy I knew April was going to talk. She'd tell other trans friends, and they'd want miracles as well. And Tess would also be looking for other people she and I could help.

As for me, I wasn't opposed to any of it, not in theory. But it would mean I'd have to act like a goddess over and over again, while more and more people started worshipping and praying to me. And while I knew I'd need that to fuel all the miracles they'd want me performing, I couldn't help worry about how it might change me or impact my life.

And I worried that sooner or later my secret would get out. I had no idea what that would look like or what it would do to my life, but I was confident it wouldn't be fun.

Now that I knew there were other gods around, and I knew they weren't all nice, I couldn't believe none of them had ever tried messing with humans or using their powers in some obvious or blatant way. Since that hadn't happened, I figured there must be some mechanism in place to prevent it.

I realized Raven might know, so I made a mental note to ask her. Then it occurred to me I didn't have to wait, and I opened up a private message dialogue with her.

"Hey Raven," I typed at her, "Two things. One, please just act normally toward me here ok? I'm not your goddess in here, I'm role playing a cleric the same way you're role playing a rogue. Two, in the real world what stops other gods from revealing themselves and their power, what stops them from messing with humans or conquering the world?"

It only took a second or two to get her reply, "One, very well my Goddess, I will try and remember that. Two, it's complicated and this is not a secure way to communicate. With your permission I will visit and tell you in person."

"Another time," I typed back. "Tonight we're having fun. Go be Raven the dark rogue, I'm Amy the cleric."

"As you wish my Goddess," she responded.

I closed the message window, but by that time Leah and Kreff had realized me and Raven weren't responding again. Our non-binary elven archer commented "She's AFK again. I think Raven is too this time?"

"They're probably just sexting in private chat," Leah teased.

I laughed, "Hardly. And sorry again. Raven and I had something come up IRL but I think it's sorted out now. We'll keep that stuff out of the game anyways, right?"

"Right," the rogue agreed.

Leah asked, "Wait you two know each other IRL? Since when?"

I mentally kicked myself, then briefly thought about trying to backpedal. I quickly dismissed the idea, now that I knew about my angel she didn't need to be so secretive.

"Yeah, it was a weird coincidence but just a couple days ago she moved into the same apartment where I live with my girlfriend." I replied.

Kreff laughed, "Small world? How'd you two actually recognize each other?"

"Oh um," I cringed slightly. "So you might not believe this, but IRL I look exactly like my character? I mean, I made my character look exactly like the real me?"

Raven added, "I'm not quite identical but I guess I look a bit like my character?"

I smiled, "Right. So we ran into each other in the lobby and she recognized me, as soon as she said something I recognized her voice..."

"And awkwardness ensued," my angel finished the lie with a laugh.

I laughed as well, "That about sums it up."

Leah and Kreff were quiet for a second or two, and I started to worry they didn't didn't buy it. Though I was impressed with Raven's acting ability.

"Damn," Leah finally stated. "You two look both like that IRL? What do you use Amy, silver hair dye and purple contacts?"

"I'm honestly a little jealous," she added a moment later. "What I wouldn't give to be my character for real."

Kreff sounded embarrassed as they added, "Yeah, same..."

Suddenly I was distracted again, wondering if I should say anything. I gave Tess's friend a miracle last night, maybe I ought to offer my friends miracles of their own as well? I knew Leah wanted to change her name, I could do that instantly for her. I didn't realize she wanted to change her appearance too, though it wasn't a surprise. And I already suspected Kreff was trans, but this was the first time they'd said anything to confirm that theory.

The awkward silence was finally broken by Leah who asked, "Shall we get started?"

We all agreed, and the four of us set out. We left the safe-zone of the town and soon we were heading through dangerous forest again. Almost a full month had passed since our fight with Dorn, and the four of us were ready to try finishing that quest our former party-member interrupted.

I was back up to the same level I'd been before, though my three companions were all a half dozen levels higher than me now. And I got myself a new enchanted staff. It was technically better than my old one, it had better stats and buffs, but I still missed the original. Which was silly since it was just bits and pixels, it didn't make sense to feel sentimental about it. But I did.

As usual Leah and Raven took point while Kreff and I followed. Our tank was ready to block any sudden attacks, the DPS had her eyes and ears open watching for traps or sneak attacks. Our archer had an arrow set on their bow, prepared for action. And I was ready to cast healing or harmful magic as required.

Like before, we got through a couple random encounters without any difficulty. During the action I was focused on the situation, but while the four of us were travelling through the woods my mind wandered elsewhere.

Should I offer miracles to my friends? How would I go about revealing myself, without scaring them away? Would I have to visit them IRL? Or should I keep silent and not offer them anything?

I didn't want to risk losing their friendship, but I suddenly felt guilty about not offering to help them with my magic. On the other hand I was already worried about being exposed and my secret getting out, so maybe it was better to keep quiet after all.

The four of us breezed through a couple more random encounters before we found our target. The quest was to retrieve an artefact from the heart of a dungeon, and as we descended into the darkness I forced myself to pay attention to the game.

It was a challenging dungeon but we worked well as a team. Leah was our vanguard with her heavy armour, great shield and sword. Raven used her agility and speed to dance through the enemy ranks while her curved blade sliced and diced. Kreff had a number of enchanted arrows, their ranged attacks kept enemies at bay. And I was there with healing magic, and light spells and monster detection spells to keep my friends healthy and warn us about danger.

We even got into some jokes and banter in between the action, which was refreshing. And we finally learned how Raven did those flickering teleportation attacks last month. Apparently it was thanks to an enchantment she won on a solo quest, when she was grinding to level-up.

When we got to the last level the dungeon boss turned out to be some kind of undead demonic dragon, which seemed a bit much. It meant the thing was overpowered and it was really hard to defeat.

It was resistant to fire and non-magical weapons, but vulnerable to light and holy magic which meant I had to spend more time focused on combat. Unfortunately that meant there were times I had to choose between attacking the boss or healing my teammates, and I wouldn't let any of my friends down.

The fight lasted a long time and there were a few tense situations. Kreff used every last enchanted arrow they had while Leah and Raven fought off the boss's minions and lieutenants. And bit by bit I pecked away at the boss in between healing my friends, until the beast was finally defeated and we captured the artefact.

We'd spent several hours clearing the dungeon and completing the quest, now it was nearly one in the morning. I knew it was probably about dawn for Leah, while it'd be evening for Kreff. And we were all tired after the fight. Even if we weren't really running around a dungeon there was still the emotional intensity and mental focus, and that could be exhausting.

While the game tallied up the experience points and loot Leah suppressed a yawn then commented, "This was fun but I'm glad it's over. I'm about ready to get some sleep."

"We still have to get back to the town so we can complete the quest and save our progress," Raven reminded her.

Kreff groaned, "You just had to jinx it didn't you?"

The rogue apologized but it was like we all knew we were going to run into trouble on the way back.

We kept focused and wary as we exited the dungeon, but we didn't encounter any other foes on our way out. And nothing was waiting for us just outside. Our trek back through the woods was relatively quiet as well. And unfortunately the quiet walking through the woods got my mind wandering again.

My thoughts drifted back to last night with April again. Then I thought ahead to next Saturday night when I'd make Tess a cleric after celebrating her birthday. I thought about my friends again, and whether or not I should offer them miracles as well. And about talking to Raven tomorrow, to find out what keeps other gods in check. And finally I thought about the potential risks of being exposed or found out.

The longer we went without any trouble the further my mind drifted, until we were nearly there. In fact it wasn't until the town walls were in sight and we were almost safe when we walked into the ambush.

With my thoughts so far away I didn't even realize what was happening until their first attacks landed and my health was in the red. Raven was down as well, she and I had been the primary targets of their initial strike.

By the time I got my wits about me Leah and Kreff were already engaged in a losing battle, and I was scrambling to heal myself and our goth rogue.

As I did so I heard Leah shout, "For fuck sake Dorn you whiny tosser! Just sod off and leave us the fuck alone!"

I was tired, I was stressed, I'd been thinking about goddess stuff, and I was extremely not in the mood to deal with our former friend's petty little revenge obsession.

It took me a month to get back the levels I lost after his last attack, I still missed my staff he cost me, and now that we'd retrieved the artefact we just had to get into town to complete the quest and save our progress. If he killed any of us now we'd have to do the whole thing over again.

I was positive that's why he decided to wait till after we finished the dungeon instead of before we entered it. He'd know we were tired, our supplies would be low, and it'd hurt us more to die now.

So I lost my cool. I forgot about the game mechanics, I ignored my character's spells, and in a moment of anger I poured some real magic through my computer and into the game world. In the heat of the moment I convinced myself it was ok, since I wasn't hurting anyone. It was just a game, just pixels and bits.

My character's health and mana were suddenly restored to maximum, as were those of my companions. The next wave of incoming arrows and spells all vanished mid-flight. Dorn and his party all found their characters frozen in place, unable to attack or retreat or use magic. Finally him and his team all had their health points start draining away.

Before they all dropped dead I stated over voice for all my friends and enemies to hear, "Dorn I'm not in the mood and I don't have time for this crap. Leave us alone. This is your only warning. Never bother us again."

The enemy players' health bars all hit zero moments after I finished talking. One by one all eight of them collapsed and vanished, dropping some gold and one or two items from inventory as the system sent them off to respawn at their last save point.

With the ambush suddenly over and the perpetrators gone, an awkward silence settled over my friends and I.

"Maybe we should all head into the town so we can finish the quest?" Raven finally suggested.

Leah agreed, "Right. Yeah."

Three of us started moving again, but Kreff held back and asked "What the fuck was that? What just happened?"

I sighed, "Sorry Kreff, Leah. I uh... Actually maybe we should take this to discord instead of discussing it here."

"Discord isn't secure either," Raven pointed out. "But it's probably a better choice than the game servers."

I sighed again, "Right. Look let's get into the town and finish up before anything else happens, ok? Complete the quest, save our progress, then we'll talk on discord."

"Fine," Kreff sighed.