NOVEL NEXT Chapter 33: Mending
As I stood outside Steve’s door, sweat rushed down my cheeks and neck, and I could feel the blood pumping even in my fingers.
I took a long, deep breath, then let out a short, dissatisfying exhale.
Alright, this is your first time getting a chance to casually talk to him… don’t fuck this up.
Closing my eyes, I prayed for things to go well, then stepped forward, only for the door to open and reveal Steve, who walked out of his room and stared me in the eyes.
Silence bounced between our lips, creating an unspoken desire that neither of us could dare satisfy.
Before I could even speak, he turned and walked away.
“W-Where…”
“Dylan told me Rose is throwing a party. I’m going over. If only to brag about my achievements.”
“I-I…” I took a step forward, reaching my hand out… but my heart beat so violently that I jolted back a couple steps.
“What? Surprised I like taking in my achievements?”
I took a second to think about what I’d say.
“N-No… that itself i-isn’t new… b-but you told me why you a-act all proud.”
“Which is?”
I’ll admit. Part of me wanted to say it was because he wanted to impress me… but something about that look on his face told me it was… the less healthy reason.
“N-Never mind…”
”Hmm. Alright. Now, you gonna shut up and go to the party with me?”
I said nothing, just simply walking to his side, before we headed out of this unit’s hallway, turned left, and walked all the way down the even longer hallway until we reached a pair of double wooden doors on the right wall, with a sign that said Bar.
Steve pushed the doors open and walked straight inside, but I just stood there… helpless.
I can’t do this… if I walk in there… I’ll be disobeying my own father.
What has he ever done for you? Pemo argued.
Raised him, kept him safe, gave him a destiny, had people teach him when he couldn’t do it himself, Raen listed.
A black, gas-like slug slithered from the crack beneath the wooden doors, and reached my foot.
Yet he’s never physically comforted Rowan. Or gave him words of encouragement.
The slug crawled up my knee, and reached my hip.
He’s always been a busy man. He always has shit to do.
Yet he can literally split himself into dozens of copies of himself.
The slug reached my chest, and then my neck.
You just love to ridicule me, huh? You selfish, egotistical prick.
Suddenly, darkness covered my vision… before white blobs scattered across the black sky.
Once I was past the wooden doors, I looked to my right, and saw Josh, alone, sitting in leather, arc-shaped seat at a wooden table in the corner with a broken ceiling light above him. After a moment, I saw Cooper stand up from a table two tables away from Josh’s. He then walked over and sat down in the seat across from Josh.
I looked to the table where Cooper came from, and spotted Rose and Dylan sitting almost directly across from each other. Dylan was right on the edge of the leather, while Rose left enough room to her left for another to sit there.
I turned around, and didn’t see Rowan. I turned around again, looking back at my… friends, and shrugged, before sitting back down next to Rose.
“Where’s Rowan?” Rose asked, concerned.
“Probably wimped out. He’s always been too much of a bitch for parties.”
“Whoa!” Rose exclaimed with shock, “What the hell’s the matter with you?!”
“What? I don’t know why you’re defending him.”
“Weren’t you friends for years? Hell, Dylan tells me you were all the both of you had before he and Issac found you!”
I shrugged again, “He’s a son of our enemy, and a coward. He’s only siding with us now to save his own skin.”
Rose looked at Dylan, then at Issac, who was singing Galway Girl karaoke at a stage in the left corner of the bar, then she looked back at Dylan again.
Dylan nodded, then said abruptly “Let’s just… stop talking about it for now. Rose gave us this time to relax, which is exactly what we’re gonna do.”
As if to contradict him, his shoulders tensed when he glanced at Issac, who was closing his eyes and seemed to be completely lost in his performance.
“He has such a… beautiful voice, like a dozen sirens all whispering my deepest desires into my ear.”
Rose smiled at me, like she knew something I didn’t.
I leaned back, grunting, and crossing my arms across my chest.
After a moment, I finally quipped “Now who isn’t relaxing?”
“I can’t relax. I have to… keep everybody together. Without me… none of us would have ever trusted each other.”
…
“Is that including her and Isabelle,” I asked, gesturing towards Rose, “I thought they were always best friends.”
Dylan laughed.
“God, no. You see…”
Dylan hesitated.
“It’s alright, you can tell the story. She trusts me to let certain people know what happened,” Rose said, her second sentence directed towards me.
I took a quick look at the crowded room, relaxing another certain someone was missing. I couldn’t see them anywhere in the crowd.
Where is Isabelle… now that I think about it?
I dunno Pemo. She probably assumed Rowan would come to the party and skipped it so she could him… I don’t blame her.
Steve! Fucking stop! We both know you love him! Rowan doesn’t deserve—
He definitely does. He should’ve told me his feelings from the start.
HE TRIED!
…
What do you mean by that?
Dylan sighed, before saying “We… weren’t Isabelle’s first unit. She had another… before us. She… became quite attached to them. But, one day… she disobeyed a direct order, so she could save some civilians… and her unit payed the price.”
“When she joined our unit, she never talked. She refused to care about anyone. Not even Rose… until I convinced her to give us a chance. And now… she’s terrified the same thing will happen with… all this.”
The music started to fade, and applause filled the room once it had completely disappeared.
“I’m the only thing holding us together. Especially now that you’re here. I…”
Dylan’s eyes swelled up with tears, before he said “I’m afraid of what will happen if I spend even a minute not helping you all…”
I uncrossed my arms, my tough-guy facade fading, and I reached an arm forward, whispering “Da—”
I stopped, and pulled my hand back.
A sudden, overwhelmingly pungent odor flushed up my nose, nearly eliminating my sense of smell.
I took a quick glance to my left, and saw a group of three men and two women sitting along five stools at the long, slick wooden bartender table in front of a wall stacked to the brim with various drinks or kegs.
Suddenly, the doors to the room slammed open, revealing Isabelle, with red marks on her neck. Everybody in the room turned to spot the disturbance, and she stumbled to the bartender table before yelling out for the bartender, demanding they got her the most potent alcohol in the bar… which everybody knew as “The Hangover”, aka, the drink for when you wanna completely forget anything that dares exist.
“Speaking of… I should probably see what happened with her,” Dylan said, pushing himself up so he could leave the table.
Then, Issac started another song. The ceiling lights dimmed from a mildly bright yellow to a dark, chilling red.
…
What did you mean, earlier?
I’d… rather not say. That’s for Rowan to tell you. Not me.
“So, umm… read any good books lately? If you read casually, that is…”
“I don’t.” I turned to meet Rose’s… strange gaze. “I only read when it’s for the purpose of learning something.”
In that moment, I realized every time Rose asked a question like that, just to get to know her crush better… I felt a singe of anger. Weirdly… this emptied my gut.
Was I… feeling guilty that she likes me?
Are… are you not angry at Rowan because he likes you?
No. I’m angry because, if he had just confessed his love for me from the start… I wouldn’t be feeling like I’m forced to love Rose.
But what if… you aren’t? What if… and hear me out here. What if this is all your own doing? That your choices have led to this?
…
Probably.
Just as I let my guard down to make sense of everything… something touched my lips. Something… angry.
Once my mind started to clear up, I took a good look at what was making contact with my mouth… only to see Rose, eyes closed… and right in front of me.
What has Rose, or Love, to hate, if it’s her entire thing to love everybody?